Hello, I'm a 20-year-old girl. I've never had a serious relationship, I don't know what it's like to love and be loved. But still, I'm very in love. The last boy I met was 28 years old. We live in a city, I had noticed it for a long time and decided to look for it on social networks. So we started writing on different topics and it intrigued me a lot. He has a great influence in our city and is definitely the man of my dreams: tall, handsome, with a strong voice, smart and hardworking. He didn't know that I was from here and how old I was, and when he found out, he was a little disappointed, but we still saw each other and agreed that we would continue our relationship. But after a while he changed his attitude and started answering me at a fairly long time. I don't know what the reason is, but I'm very annoyed, because it got under my skin from the moment we met and I only think about it. I dare say that I am a smart and good-looking girl and I have never lacked male attention, on the contrary. The problem is that when I meet someone I get attached very quickly and I start to have some expectations, but definitely things don't turn out the way I imagine and I get disappointed. I have the feeling that I will never find a person for myself and I will be left alone. Every night when I go to bed I start crying, I wonder where the problem is and does it make sense to live in a situation where I have not yet experienced the best feeling. I am asking for advice.... that when I meet someone I get attached very quickly and I start to have some expectations, but definitely things don't turn out the way I imagine and I get disappointed. I have the feeling that I will never find a person for myself and I will be left alone. Every night when I go to bed I start crying, I wonder where the problem is and does it make sense to live in a situation where I have not yet experienced the best feeling. I am asking for advice.... that when I meet someone I get attached very quickly and I start to have some expectations, but definitely things don't turn out the way I imagine and I get disappointed. I have the feeling that I will never find a person for myself and I will be left alone. Every night when I go to bed I start crying, I wonder where the problem is and does it make sense to live in a situation where I have not yet experienced the best feeling. I am asking for advice....
Answers 10
I think you're pushing men away with your expectations and this "sticking." OK, you looked for the person instead of him looking for you, which is normal, but you shouldn't have hinted at a relationship and how much you like him from the first date. In principle, men should take this step. The man was otherwise interested, but something in you repelled him and it was not age, but rather the feeling that you were expecting things he was not ready for. Men in general / there is nothing to turn it around / go out with girls for sex and good company, experiences. They are not looking for a relationship because of the relationship itself, but they want to get to know the woman first, to see if they will be fine with her in bed and out, and only then do they take the next steps. You probably pushed him away with your naivety, your inexperience - he saw that you would have more headaches than good experiences and he broke, but I think that he didn't cut you off permanently. You can continue to follow what he does on Facebook and write comments, like his photos - he may still be looking for you, but he has to do it. If another time you are looking for contact with a man through Facebook, I advise you to first put a real photo on your profile and your real age, so as not to be disappointed. Write on the wall of people various comments on their posts, but do not talk to them personally. Also take an active part in social events in your city - go to city concerts, go out among people. Tell your friends that you would like to have a boyfriend - they can arrange a meeting with a cousin, brother, acquaintance, but in general men should take this step. I have a very pleasant experience with an arranged meeting, but nothing happened because honestly I still loved my ex-boyfriend and we got together, but the man, who I was introduced to was top notch and in other circumstances something very nice would happen, I'm sure. It doesn't scare men. Let things happen on their own and leave them the initiative. And don't think that the "best feeling" is to be with a man. You have to learn to be happy for yourself and then men will start looking for you. There is nothing more frightening than a depressed woman who wants a man to fix her life and make her happy.
I will tell you only one thing. If you can't be happy on your own, you probably won't be happy for long and committed. Don't look at us men as something on which your happiness depends. I came up with the saying "If you want to make your wishes come true, get rid of them first". So if you don't learn to be happy now, you won't be happy later.
I agree with № 1, but not completely. Indeed, when you show interest, you scare men, but mostly those who don't like you enough. Try it with a boy who is not well-built from there and suffers from a lack of female attention, to behave like that, let's see if he will run away. No. This is the behavior of a man with self-confidence and unfortunately, even if you are very obsessed with him, he is not. The fact that you look good does not mean that there are not many other women who look good and he shows it to you by withdrawing. . F, 28
If you have expectations, then you are in a serious relationship, but you still do not know if you have met a serious man. The more frustrated you are with your failed attempts, the less you will fall in love and the more sober you will think, until you will finally find the one you are looking for. That is, my advice is to continue living as before and someday things will work out as you expected, but just be careful "not to step on the onion", then you will feel like a rag.
Are you a Cancer author?
Number 5, I was just about to write it !!!
No, I'm a calf.
What makes you think the author is cancer? I am a cancer, I am her age and it can be said that I am at the other extreme of her situation ... for me almost everything is love and I have had quite long relationships as for my age, but I have never "pursued "Man, even if I like someone very much, I haven't shown them first in any way, and with all the men I've had a relationship with, they've taken the first step. What is written on the horoscopes is not always true, and yet crabs sometimes hide in their shells, do not always show all their feelings and emotions :)
I am a calf too. Taurus and cancer are the two most emotional signs in the zodiac. And I'm 20, and I haven't had a relationship, and I'm in love. I believe that there is time for everything. We are 20 years old. Life is before us. I am sure that you and I will soon find the great love! :) this man, in my opinion, as you said, is smart. Some lunatic would come to you for the number as soon as you're good at it. Men in their 50s stick to people like you ... my opinion is that he doesn't know exactly what he wants and doesn't want to mislead you. Write it off as more than a friend. Ask him what the problem is and why he is behaving this way, explain to him that you only want to maintain friendly relations, and this, if it is written to you, will grow into something bigger. Good luck
'He's a big influence in our city' ... at 28? with influence? !? Abe, you are either from the village or you are very deluded. There is no such animal as a 28-year-old with influence. Unless his parents are some kind of 'so-so'. Then it may have an effect in the eyes of the smaller sets of it, but this is a pure illusion. Otherwise, calm down and focus on boys your age. There are many of your peers who are also terribly lonely and secretly cry in the evening that no one notices them yet.