How can I part more gently with my obsessive girlfriend? We've been together for three years, we don't live together, but we generally spend a lot of time with each other, but she still says it wasn't like that. I also get annoyed because I ignore some friends because of her, but she felt she was in the background and I didn't compromise. I had told her several times that I had no intention of starting a family and children in the near future, and she lost her temper, but after a few days she spoke to me again about family, dormitory, etc. In general, none of us is perfect, but during these three years we got along well and didn't drive seriously, but we obviously have different views on how our lives will go. I don't want to hurt her and make her suffer, but I want to end this relationship, obviously she wants more than I can give her. Please give advice on how it can be done in the most cultural way. thanks
Answers 8
* No matter how softly you tell her, there will be: - Roar - Repentance - Mental lability * To feel sorry for her the most and to stay with her, you will have to swallow your desires and aspirations. * And if you have finally decided that you will not comply with it anymore ... - You explain that your views are different - You say: "Your obsessive state makes me withdraw from you." - Let's stay friends (cliché, yes, but it can work) - I don't see a future with you * Good luck in the separation! - Mary
Don't waste her time. Tell her that you enjoy hanging out and sleeping with her, but you don't want a family and children with and from her. That will be enough.
Maybe he wants to know what will follow from these 3 years with you, will there be any sense of development, or will you just see each other and that's it. It also depends on how old you are, but I don't think there will be a person who will waste 3-4 years in the wind if, for example, the other doesn't even want to live together, but only meetings, etc. Nobody says anything about children , marriage, but you can't spend years with someone only on the level of meetings, and really without upgrading. Her behavior is just a normal way to find out what might happen to her in the future, how serious you are about her, and whether she's wasting time in years of meeting you instead of meeting a man who won't be afraid to try something. more.
I agree with the opinion of 1. In general, such people are toxic, even if you start a family it will get worse. And they are good manipulators. Be prepared to be blamed even for solar eclipses. In general, just don't argue with her, tell her you have to break up, so you've decided for your own good. If you go and explain yourself, the accusations I mentioned will follow.
What kind of ***** do you have to be to ask strangers how to gently dump the woman you've been dating for 3 years? Is this your first time dropping one? How old are you, kid? Besides, you don't love her if you loved her, firstly - you wouldn't feel obsessed and secondly - if you understood each other (your words), you wouldn't leave her. You don't love her and you didn't love her. It is your fault that you are in a "serious relationship" with her. Tell yourself at the beginning what you are so that no one is deceived. She's making family plans, so she didn't know you didn't want to.
I have come across such men several times and I assure you that it is extremely unpleasant. Especially this 'freaking out' that the author mentions is super stressful. I even tell myself that I don't want children in general, and these men always thought they could change me over time or something. The people who think they can change someone, put them in a frame of their own, are probably the most deluded in this world. Author, just be direct and categorical, there is no other way. It sucks, but it can't happen without suffering, because she's just already wrapped everything in her head and probably already your great-grandchildren can imagine what they will be ..
And why did you waste her time? She's not honoring you, I hope she realizes sooner that you'll actually do her a favor by breaking up.
Have you been dating for three years and don't even live together? Well, it's normal to wonder if it makes sense to invest more time in this regard or not. Obviously, in my opinion, the answer is no. After all this time, you are not even ready to live with her, obviously you do not take her seriously and she feels it. Release her and don't waste any more time.