Hello! I will drive straight. I have a friend for almost 5 months. Whenever he calls me or I know he's coming to pick me up to go somewhere together and a worry starts, I can't even put on make-up like people do. It's the same during sex, I just feel my hands tremble. He is my first ... let's say it's because of that, but we went on vacation, I stay with them, he knows ours and I know theirs, time has passed anyway. What could it be? Even when he kisses me and I pull away sometimes, something always scares me. And I want it so much. Recently, he even started asking me if I'm okay, if he's too rude, he can feel it - my pulse is speeding up a lot. I don't know what to say. I'm generally more shy, but when we talk about work or whatever - no problem ... he even tells me that I've started to open up a lot (as a joke), but if he gets too close and gets to a kiss, I even go numb, I've already said about sex, it's all in his hands. Will it pass with time? Maybe that's a little for me? Or am I just like that? I also wonder what men think. I know they love the liberated, but still. At 21
Answers 9
So am I. I'm very excited to see or know I'm going to see my boy. I was wondering, but it is obviously from the strong emotions, excitement, feelings ... He knows it and always accepts it with a smile. :)
Don't worry, over time you will get better. You just still feel some shame, which is normal and very sweet! Just don't worry, everything will be fine :)
I'm like you, even worse. I hate myself a little for that, but it looks cute on the side. It means that you have feelings for the person next to you, and you are not with him just for one fuck. Those who are looking for "liberated" are not looking for them for anything but dirty sex. Do you think they love them? They use them to satisfy the urge and perversions they have seen in porn. Fact. And those who can love are looking for modest and decent girls. Fact.
Calm down, because it's your first. Time will pass, you will relax more. 5 months is nothing.
You're just very much in love, darling.
You are obviously more anxious in general, but after 5 months of relationship you had to relax at least a little in his presence. Does something in his behavior bother you? It may be on a subconscious level, at least I guess so. There are people who scare me, they are unpleasant to me, I tell myself frankly. Their very look, their very posture. But you shouldn't be afraid of your friend. I think it will pass with time if he himself is kind and treats you well. :) As I understand it, so give yourself time.
You mistakenly think that men like the more liberated. Do you really think that if I'm with someone who broke 100k ** and I'll die of fun. They can't even have sex because they're already bored. Not to mention feelings and devotion. The feeling of being with one is like talking to the saleswoman in the supermarket and being her 100th customer for today. And her smile is on duty and her attitude. Hypocrisy and interests. Even many of them they take for the next, even if they are no longer in the first place. Because their inertia. Trust me. The thrill you feel at the moment is UNIQUE. Literally. I hope the boy is right that you are still in love.
And there was one such male individual in my life who made me extremely inadequate, figuratively speaking. Call it excitement, love thrill. It happened to me that I got so excited before a meeting that my legs were shaking and I was a little sick of those butterflies in my stomach. I was in this state for about 3-4 months, and then I learned to cross my boundaries and relax. Not that I still didn't enjoy a meeting, on the contrary, but at least it didn't affect me so much physically, I got into a rhythm. There was a storm of emotions in me, I did not shrink from fear, I shrank from joy. I learned to concentrate on all the good feelings I have and in this way I felt an incredible desire to show them. So I stopped shivering and worrying. I saw him and immediately went to hug him, to rejoice in him, to indulge in desire and the same to stop bothering me. I realized I was shaking because I wanted to kiss him, not for anything else. It may be the same with you. Try to make sense of your feelings and put them in order. I was in love for more than a year, then I just loved him for a few more years. If I had to tremble constantly with him during all this time during our meetings, I would probably get enviable plates on my stomach, but, alas. Here I will admit that really almost until the end of our relationship I felt different tremors and there were moments when my pulse was frighteningly fast, but it only took me a few months to get used to and learn to control my nervousness, if not my heart. He was also my first and I, like you, didn't know very much what to do at first, but I had a very strong desire to be with him and I allowed myself to demonstrate it, to take the initiative for bed gymnastics and to control the situation with a little control. As much as I can, so much. Not that I didn't have shoots, but it didn't matter, he was in love too. Once I failed to take off his pants, something happened to his belt, all the romance died, but we have a funny memory and now I smile when I write these lines. Your anxiety is unnecessary when your intimate moments are full of shared love. Repeat it often so you don't forget. Trust your body, it knows what it wants, let it act and doesn't think about anything extraneous (like whether your hair is tousled) while you're naked with the person you're holding on to. something happened to the belt, all the romance died, but we have a funny memory and now I smile when I write these lines. Your anxiety is unnecessary when your intimate moments are full of shared love. Repeat it often so you don't forget. Trust your body, it knows what it wants, let it act and doesn't think about anything extraneous (like whether your hair is tousled) while you're naked with the person you're holding on to. something happened to the belt, all the romance died, but we have a funny memory and now I smile when I write these lines. Your anxiety is unnecessary when your intimate moments are full of shared love. Repeat it often so you don't forget. Trust your body, it knows what it wants, let it act and doesn't think about anything extraneous (like whether your hair is tousled) while you're naked with the person you're holding on to.
I was like that with my third boyfriend, but I hadn't had sex in 2 years. Excitement, anxiety, excitement, it's normal, but it's a little awkward if the man is decent he won't laugh or find it abnormal. For me, however, it was the exact opposite on his part, but nothing;)