I am a 43-year-old woman, with an older child, I have lived with a 13-year-old man, I have my own home, I have a profession and a job. 3 months ago I saw my old friend, with whom we grew up together, we talked, I asked him about a friend of his, with whom I had a relationship 15 years ago, I asked for the phone number of this old love of mine, which was my biggest love in life . I thought for 2 days and dialed the phone to hear the man I loved very much and our relationship lasted 2 years (he was married), we broke up without explanation 15 years ago, he just stopped calling, we rarely saw each other at the end of the relationship and we broke up, nor he and I fought, there was no drama, but it was hard for me, I didn't tell anyone how much I was suffering. When our relationship ended, I met my current husband and we lived together. A year after we already lived together man, about whom I mentioned call me again, came to my work, asked me how I live, what I do and I told him that I live with a man, since then he has not called again. So three months ago, after I took his phone from the friend I grew up with as a child, I called him and he recognized me, he was happy, we talked for three hours on the phone, on the viber then that evening we wrote for another two hours. The next day he sent me his photo on the viber, we hadn't seen each other for 12 years, I also sent it to him. We talked for another hour about who lives what and how. The next day he came to my work, he had been living in another city for 9 years, he got up from that city and came to see me. We talked, drank coffee, I have a company and an office and stayed until 11 pm in the office to see each other, hugged, kissed, kept me in my arms all night and did not let me go, we had sex, he said, that he regretted that he hadn't done anything to live together in the past, he hadn't left my office in the evening, he said that when he heard me on the phone his heart was pounding with excitement and he couldn't believe it. He said that he has not got along with his wife for years, they live in different rooms, from time to time they go to the theater, go shopping, but that's it.
His wife is strong financially, he makes a lot of money, he also makes money, but not as much as her. He admitted to me that 15 years since we separated he started changing women often, now he has 3 lovers who he used only for sex and they used him for the same, he rarely called them too, but when he wanted to go out with one late at home, but not very often. He told me that such feelings as they were then with me in our relationship with no one had ever experienced, many women have since gone through it, he was looking for something different and couldn't find it and now it was like that, now he only had pieces. He left late because he was married and had a trip to the city where he had lived for 9 years. The next day I called him, he said that in the evening when he came home he had a big scandal with his wife, he didn't tell me why. He promised to come see me again in two days, but ... he called a day later and said, "I'm not coming because I feel like the other women I have, like another number, and I don't want that to happen. We didn't have to have sex when we saw each other, we just had to talk. I'm not coming now, I'm going to come further, I want to think. "I agreed. Two weeks later I wrote to him on the viber, he didn't answer me, I called him, he didn't pick up my phone, the next day I wrote again, he didn't answer me again. I stopped looking for him and writing. Two weeks later, he sent me a song on Viber, which is my favorite and his, and we wrote to each other. After another week I wrote to him, but he did not answer. He neither wrote to me nor called. In the end, what he wanted, he said he would think about us, what we would do, he thought for three months, and I don't write often, he writes to Viber. I can't understand anything. I live in a medium-sized city, close to the sea, our city is nice, he also lived in this city until 9 years ago. The distance from my city to the city where he now lives is 70 km. However, the situation with this man is dark to me. I think he is afraid that we will not delve into the relationship again, as he once did, because at one time he was very depressed and in order not to get deeper again, he is careful, but I don't know if that's the case. He has a business in the other city, he is developing this business and now he is making money, he has settled there for years, he and his wife have an apartment where they both live at the moment. I have no explanation for his behavior. I hope I didn't bore you with my writing.
Answers 39
Didn't you think for a moment that there is a huge difference between what he tells you and what he really is? Have you had sex and bye, nothing more
You did your best to come up with another fake story. This sounds more like the plot of a Turkish TV series than a real story.
I don't think he has any feelings for you, he just wanted sex and as you can see he got it. You are actually his 4th mistress, and he will almost never part with his wife because of you. You made the mistake of looking for him, he had to stay in the past where he was before. - scorpion.
The man does not want to part with his wife. This is the explanation for his behavior. Don't get involved in rumors that he doesn't sleep with his wife and blah blah. Certainly not. Ask yourself, if, hypothetically, you get together to live together, what will happen to his lovers? Will you end your relationship with them, do you think? Or in a short time you will find yourself in the situation of his wife?
Stop doing it, it's just using you.
If I'm your age, I won't expect anything
The author: I forgot to say - he has no children. This is his first marriage, his wife's is also his first marriage.
I think deep down you know very well what he wants and what you are to him. But you are afraid to admit it to yourself. The gentleman starts the car on the first day to have sex with a new babe (sex after 15 years is new sex), and then there is none. You have to think. You have allowed a crazy youth adventure to last too long, 14 years too long.
Well, I'm sorry, but I'm personally bored. You are 43 years old and it is not clear to you that your hero spoke sweet stories just to slap you? Do you seriously think there is any chance at all? The only reason he sends you songs on viber is because he wants to slap you again and this door doesn't close. So much.
Well, he clearly told you, even you wrote it to us: "I will not come, because I feel like the other women I have, like another number and I do not want it to be so. We should not have sex when we met. I didn't just come now, I'll come further, I want to think. "In my opinion, by 'I want to think' he meant to think about his own feelings, of what he was feeling, and not 'for your future as a couple' for example. And apparently during his thinking he confirmed what he told you. I also think that he obviously really respects you as a person, otherwise he would have fixed you 2-3 more times and then just stopped contacting you at all. Well, that's what he's actually doing now, but if he didn't respect you, he wouldn't be so honest with himself. And he sent you a song more out of guilt that he awakened some hope in you. And at the moment you just see what you want to see, not what is real and at the same time super obvious, and you are told quite literally. But don't get ridiculed and negative comments here. It can happen to anyone, no matter what age they are. Or 'if I'm your age, I won't expect anything'. At any age one can find love. I advise you to look ahead and look for someone new. Digging in the past usually brings mostly negative experiences, and in my opinion it is typical for cowardly people. ж31 But don't get ridiculed and negative comments here. It can happen to anyone, no matter what age they are. Or 'if I'm your age, I won't expect anything'. At any age one can find love. I advise you to look ahead and look for someone new. Digging in the past usually brings mostly negative experiences, and in my opinion it is typical for cowardly people. ж31 But don't get ridiculed and negative comments here. It can happen to anyone, no matter what age they are. Or 'if I'm your age, I won't expect anything'. At any age one can find love. I advise you to look ahead and look for someone new. Digging in the past usually brings mostly negative experiences, and in my opinion it is typical for cowardly people. ж31
Another womanizer with 3 lovers .... Do you really expect anything from this man besides sex? Did Sam tell you that he didn't take you for anything different? I understand that it is an old love for you, but you yourself say that you live with a man.
Up to №2 by the author: At least our story is not made up, it is quite real!
As soon as I read about the three lovers, it became clear to me that this could not end well. men have moments of sentimentality just like us - I say it from experience - almost all my exes periodically look for me, write, but I know exactly what that means and I'm not mistaken. if things are over at some point, then there was a reason ... you had sex, he satisfied this sentiment and withdrew ... that is. do not look for more than what is there or more precisely what is not in this relationship . makes an impression on how it all ends both times - with a retreat from him. I personally do not give a second chance, let alone a third. people don't change and people give us clear signals about what they represent, even outright, and sometimes they say what's lame about them - you just have to be open-minded from the beginning. this saves a lot of pain and frustration.
To № 9 by the Author: I have a big son and I raise him in values and respect for women from an early age. I sincerely hope he doesn't make fun of anyone's feelings and that his goal is to "slap" her.
To №3 and 9: Yes, and I think like you. I don't think there is any chance, it could only be a relationship based solely on sex and rare dates. I have no illusions about anything more than sex, at least He showed it with his actions, I wanted the opinion of more people. Thanks to everyone for the feedback. From the Author.
Sex. This is the explanation. F31
I fully support opinion number 10.
And what explanation to have? Sex and only sex. As long as you filmed looking for a calf under the ox. A man with serious intentions just doesn't behave like that. And you're engaged, aren't you? What to expect from you! You don't know how funny and elementary everything is. Who's in my pants ...
You are a big woman, but you are worse than 18 years old. Both before and now the man has been married, his wife is comfortable and you are only for variety. Don't you get it?
Oh this is a fucking hypocrite. Good thing you broke up. Hell of a brazen lie. If I were you, I would believe his words. but the facts speak for themselves .... a woman and three lovers
You mention that the person has no children in the comments below. You say you had a relationship years ago and he was married to the same woman again. I think he's a gigolo who got married for money - you say his wife makes a lot of money. Even at that time he did not reunite with you, to this day he has not divorced his wife, he has no children and so on. There are men really who never want to have children in their lives. I don't know the reason he doesn't have a child. but this woman of his also has no child. However, the reasons can be many. I don't think your man decided to ruin his family in time, despite whatever the reasons for a child. His wife, too. This tells me that the two are obviously happy with their lives with each other only that he cheats on her and not with one and two constantly. You can't talk about his love for his wife, it's clear that money is a priority for your man, and that doesn't speak well of him at all. You can't hope for more than sex. I'm sorry to say this, but for me the man is mercantile, the interesting part of his wife is constantly reconciled with a few in a life in which there is no child. even if the reason is in him, which I don't know, and his wife lives with him and has not decided to separate over the years. Of course, everyone in life makes their choice for everything. I do not condemn anyone. I express an opinion. You can't want and expect anything from your ex. And he only wants sex from you and nothing more. It is clear that he likes sex with you and he strives for that. Everything he told you when you saw each other was for the sole purpose of having sex with you. It is best to leave it in the past and do not deal with it anymore. Not worth it.
I understand you and I know how a person feels when he loves someone, and not recently. However, I will tell you that He only wants sex from you after everything I have read. He doesn't want to close the door for sex. Don't bother anymore. Leave it in the past because that's where it belongs. I don't believe he will give you love when I read the story. It will only hurt you. It is not worth renewing this relationship. The man only wants sex from you and nothing else. He will continue to cheat on his wife, he will be fine with money and his life will go that way. Don't look for him, don't write, let him live his life. Look ahead and don't go back to him.
What will he think? Because there are other lovers and he has no intention of abandoning any of them, and a new one may have appeared on the horizon. He wants to buy time when he fucks you, with an apology for the expression, to be available to him. Let him think for the rest of his life. Don't deal with it. No feelings. He just wants sex with you, nothing more. He will stay with his wife. Leave it in the past.
Everything is clear. The dude wants sex with you when he's happy. Don't be sorry you called. At least you understand that there are no feelings and you can't hope for anything. Don't believe what he's talking about his wife and other things. She wants sex ONLY. You decide whether to have such a relationship with a man you loved. You have no other chance but sex with him. M. 46 g
The gentleman has been with his wife for years because of her money and the material she gives him. He will never divorce her. You will be his next mistress, who will fuck without feelings for sports and for cool sex. I even doubt before he had feelings for you. For him, money and material things are important. Don't believe the kind words he said to you. M. 54
The man does not deserve to give himself again. Stop! Pay attention to the people around you. F 41
He sends you songs on the viber when you're not looking for him, he looks for you when you're not looking for him because he knows you still have feelings for him and it kind of flatters him. He doesn't deserve your attention. Some time ago he withdrew. Apparently he doesn't care about love. He wants sex from you, he won't give you anything more. Money and sex - the values of this man. If it suits you, act. M. 49
He would think. What does he have to think? Let the men say. Their understanding of things is different. J. 35
Watch the actions of a man, do not bind yourself to words. The actions of the guy say one thing, no serious intentions, no feelings. He wonders how it will go. Kefi is ONLY having sex with you. You will be his next mistress and there will be others along with you.
It is clear to him that you still love him. You appear like thunder from a clear sky years later. He has lovers, his life settled with money. He doesn't know what to do. I'm not sure he has no feelings. He wanders. M 51
only I understood that the author has a man who does not appear anywhere in your comments, that he is neglected and deceived is not important, it is important whether the old man will come again to hat here, I'm not saying that you did it, but that your thoughts are you engaged with the former
I'm a man. My opinion on the issue of this story is different and I will allow myself to share it with the author. The man in the story has feelings for you. You are not a vent for sex like his lovers, but the money he has through his wife, the material, will not allow him to part with her. For him, money is of great importance. He deliberately told you that you are one of the many for sex, because he himself does not know where to catch at the moment, he wants time. He flatters himself in thought. He doesn't seem to love his wife. He even certainly leads politics and pretends to love it when they are alone. He understands that you are not indifferent to him. He is not happy in his life. It will not be with the many lovers on the wings of love. He himself is aware of this. Do not be surprised if he looks for you after a while, but not to live with you, but because he has feelings, he knows that you have, he will ask for sex. But he will stay with his wife. Men are often cowards in life.
At your age, with a partner and a child, do you ask a similar question? Apparently you filmed very tightly with this womanizer. Before and now he only wanted sex and entertainment. If he only wanted to be with you and loved you truly, he would have divorced and reunited in time. Is it worth spitting on the present because of the past? To cheat on the man you're with now? You say that you raise your child in values, and what are yours, since you pass the person to you so easily? Like your favorite from the past. You have the right to live your life the way you want, but not to lie and betray the person you are connected to. It's just disgusting.
When he came home in the evening, he had a scandal with his wife, but he didn't tell you what. She smelled that she was under the influence of the shows with you, she understood instinctively that there was something. She may have issued ultimatums. The man is scared that he will drive him away and loses money and tells you that he will not come and he has to think ... It is clear.
The dude won't get up the next day to see you travel if he has no feelings. He is confused. His wife pressed him in the evening when he came home. He needs time, so he said he would think.
The commentator under number 13 has most correctly captured the genesis of these relations, there is nothing to add. Unfortunately, such behavior has recently become quite common among both men and women. Take the incident as a moment of weakness on your part and don't think about it anymore. And to continue a relationship in some form will not bring you anything good - only pain and disappointment.
He wants sex with you! Don't believe the words! You will be one of his lovers. As he is with them, so he will be with you. Only sex is in the foreground.
Why do you live in your past !? ... and you miss the present and have no future !!! In 15 years, neither He nor You are the same people. People without dignity !!! He goes to bed at night with his rich wife, you go to bed with the Unloved Man ... they were unhappy! This is your choice. Who are you lying to and what do you expect ... 3 hours of "happiness" on the couch in the office. He will not divorce his wife, nor will you leave your husband. Instead of asking yourself what to expect from him, sit down and talk to your husband about your problems ... and most of all, ask yourself Why do I live in my past and not in the present ... what do I miss?
You can't be absolutely sure what he thinks. But you can tell by his actions. And to read the small print, ie the small and insignificant things he told you. I support the opinions of 10 and 33. I think he really has strong feelings for you. It's not just about sex. He is madly in love with you. No, he will not divorce his wife to live with you. You give him what he lacks in marriage. And he knows very well that if he reunites with you, in time he will be overwhelmed by routine and monotony again. But to live together, you have to destroy your current families, to hurt a lot of people - starting with your spouses, your child, parents, friends, yourself, etc. It will really be a nightmare for both of you and on this nightmare. you need to build a new relationship. Strange and immoral as it may sound, if you are of the same mind and opinion, you can look after your personal life and families, but enjoy each other for years to come. M37