I was finally afraid to share my story. I want someone to give me advice on what to do, because I only hear from my closest friends: you have to decide, the decision is yours, I don't know how I would act in your place ... etc. I understand that it is my decision but I don't see myself from the side at the moment ... I will tell you, briefly and I ask someone to give me advice, because I am already going crazy from thinking and worrying. And so we have been together since we were children - from 17 years old, now I am 35 years old. We have had a long relationship since 1996. until 2006 we were boyfriends and since 2006 we have been married - for 8 years. We have no children. Everything was going well, we loved each other a lot, we couldn't do without each other, it was like that for the first 5-6 years since we met. His parents adopted me "as if" as their child. I respected them a lot, but over time I found out more and more, that they are still dissatisfied with me - I was lazy, I did not go to their village every week with my husband to work with them, it is still not enough ... He was always there. I worked agricultural work with them for 10 -12 hours a day, I was dying from work and they were still not satisfied. So I was silent for about 10 years and swallowed "frogs" just to have peace and not to quarrel with them and especially with his father for me. He began to alienate himself, to work more and more, he stopped paying attention to me, I was last for him. As a family, money has never been shared - he spends his money as he pleases, but he takes care of mine. He made good money from agriculture, but he put everything in the bank, and I, the madwoman, spent my money on food, on clothes, that is, I took care of myself. But I kept putting up with him and sticking to his talk that things " they kept quiet about everything and even said that I wanted 50% of the property, that I was some kind of accountant. It hurt me a lot, because the person next to me is on their side. Things have been going from bad to worse for a year and a half now, I'm telling him I'll leave him, but he's not taking me seriously. So left alone without a drop of hope, I met a new person, at first it was nothing serious, but over time I saw that he gives everything for me, I felt alive and wanted again. It so happened that I was currently pregnant and did not know what to do. I know I shouldn't have allowed it, but it happened. I haven't had children in over 10 years and I was desperate that this would never happen. Now I have a very difficult decision to make - to keep the child and start a whole new life or to give up the child and give another chance to my husband, without being at all sure, that this time things will work out, still the wolf's fur changes, but the temper does not. I haven't been on my own for a few days ... I want this child, but it will be very difficult. I know that some people think I will be a "slut" and an "infidel," but God is my witness that I tried everything to fix my marriage, and only I know what I went through. Please advise me something, you will still be of great help to me, even if you treat me negatively.
Answers 39
It's not good that you didn't leave him AFTER you met this other one, but ... Don't ask, but start fresh with the child. F40
Do what you want, but don't give up on the child !!! Children are the meaning of life. By the way, you didn't say why you didn't have children from your husband?
Of course to start over. How can you even think? These people have poisoned your life. Will they condemn you? Why did you choose to have a child and live normally as you are loved and respected? God has given you a sign girl! Come to your senses! And don't care who tells you what. This is your life and your child's already. Live for yourself, not for bad people. That is the answer. SUCCESS! :)
I would tell you a lot of negative things ... only with this grumbling for so many years how you will leave it you are clear. What kind of trust and respect do you want when you are obviously blackmailing from the very beginning. Either way, it doesn't matter now. Baby, it's important! How is it possible to hesitate at all, to ask others ...? !! Does this mean that you are uncharacteristic of me except a grumble and that someone still has to make decisions for you? I hope it's not like that ... It's time to take responsibility for yourself and the child you are carrying! Tighten up in the fastest way and start acting. If the new one is so "amazing", I guess at the moment he took down another star, I hope he's responsible, besides being a good listener ... Ugh, I don't even know where to start .... I'll tell you what I would do , but the difference is that I don't need to "racketeer" the man next to me emotionally. We are equal, we can be together, we can be separate, we are together because we love each other, not because we are dependent. Well, I would move the divorce in the fastest way. I would give birth to and look after the child with or without "amazing". No one knows how strong he is until he has to act. Believe me, the mother is capable of EVERYTHING for her child. I even think that it will force you to grow up at last and take your life in your hands. There are no "chances" for your husband to give you more, I suspect that you yourself have exploded the chances he has given you over the years, hence the distrust about the property. And to be honest, I understand it, and if they constantly threaten me how they will leave me ... in fact, I would not give a chance, I open the door directly and who came from where. I wouldn't last 18 minutes, let alone 18 years. This husband of yours has the patience of an ox. Accept the child as a gift, (it is) end your marriage with dignity, and start a new life cleanly. And for God's sake, stop manipulating, blackmailing, racketeering emotionally ... because the new one may not be so patient and show you the way so quickly that you will feel dizzy.
I don't see any point in continuing to have anything to do with your husband other than "out of habit." And why didn't you have children with him after so many years together, it just doesn't fit my mind, honestly! It's been 17 years, and you're already that age, I don't find any justification for the situation at all, unless your husband and family are so selfish, but it's a fact that "slut" or not - you have no future with this person and in the end, only you will suffer from your decision. Take yourself in your arms and look after your life, the child, etc., because no one will thank you for sacrificing your happiness for the sake of human opinion! m28
You got pregnant by another man and you're still wondering what to do. Does the father know? You wonder which one to choose, but do you really have a choice? Do not turn out that the other does not want to deal with finding out about the child. If he is ready, then leave your husband. Better than having an abortion at 35 after waiting so long for a baby. Otherwise, almost everyone tries to protect themselves from their wives so that they do not have any claims to any property, but this is usually done at the very beginning, when you have not yet spent a long time with a man. If after 8 years of marriage and 18 years of relationship you have not yet passed this stage, then you will never pass it. You don't have children, nothing connects you, except the habit of everything going the same way and the fear of admitting that everything has been in vain so far.
If you are pregnant by your new friend, what can you think of him, live with him if he wants to, of course! If you are pregnant by your husband, consider whether he will take good care of your child and whether you are ready in the name of his happiness to become an impersonal person, without the right to an opinion and without personal needs. But know that in twenty years the child will have grown up and left the family nest, then you will be a woman of extreme age and I will wonder how your life went and were you happy? Know that then it will hurt a lot because you will realize that everything is lost forever!
So, as far as I understand, you are pregnant by the other man. First I want to tell you that everything that has happened to you is precisely because you did it that way, that is, you want advice on something that you have already made as a decision. I start with the property, you may think that your husband ignored your words that you would leave him, but he obviously did not miss it, that's why they made you the number with the property. Think of him and his parents. You give the money you spent in your child's life to have a place to live, but his wife scares him that she will leave him. Naturally, after the divorce, she will take his apartment and he will stay on the street. You would do the same for your child. Second, if you got pregnant by someone else, then the problem was with your husband. I have no idea if you've tried in vitro or otherwise, but you're pregnant by someone anyway. Why you got pregnant by your lover is clear because you did not take precautions. And why didn't you take precautions? Because you wanted a child from him. So I don't see why you ask what to do after you've decided what to do? You wanted a child from your lover, you got it. One thing is clear. If you have a lover and you are expecting a child from him and you wanted a child from him, then I do not see why you seek guilt from your husband and make him an evil demon. What you have done, every married woman knows is not right, but like any other woman, the one guilty of your sins is your wife. I'm not going to ask if your lover is married, because I'm 99% sure he is. So, there's no point in asking for advice, you've made the decision. May your child be alive and well and may your new husband not leave you for another mistress. And why didn't you take precautions? Because you wanted a child from him. So I don't see why you ask what to do after you've decided what to do? You wanted a child from your lover, you got it. One thing is clear. If you have a lover and you are expecting a child from him and you wanted a child from him, then I do not see why you seek guilt from your husband and make him an evil demon. What you have done, every married woman knows is not right, but like any other woman, the one guilty of your sins is your wife. I'm not going to ask if your lover is married, because I'm 99% sure he is. So, there's no point in asking for advice, you've made the decision. May your child be alive and well and may your new husband not leave you for another mistress. And why didn't you take precautions? Because you wanted a child from him. So I don't see why you ask what to do after you've decided what to do? You wanted a child from your lover, you got it. One thing is clear. If you have a lover and you are expecting a child from him and you wanted a child from him, then I do not see why you seek guilt from your husband and make him an evil demon. What you have done, every married woman knows is not right, but like any other woman, the one guilty of your sins is your wife. I'm not going to ask if your lover is married, because I'm 99% sure he is. So, there's no point in asking for advice, you've made the decision. May your child be alive and well and may your new husband not leave you for another mistress. after you have decided what to do? You wanted a child from your lover, you got it. One thing is clear. If you have a lover and you are expecting a child from him and you wanted a child from him, then I do not see why you seek guilt from your husband and make him an evil demon. What you have done, every married woman knows is not right, but like any other woman, the one guilty of your sins is your wife. I'm not going to ask if your lover is married, because I'm 99% sure he is. So, there's no point in asking for advice, you've made the decision. May your child be alive and well and may your new husband not leave you for another mistress. after you have decided what to do? You wanted a child from your lover, you got it. One thing is clear. If you have a lover and you are expecting a child from him and you wanted a child from him, then I do not see why you seek guilt from your husband and make him an evil demon. What you have done, every married woman knows is not right, but like any other woman, the one guilty of your sins is your wife. I'm not going to ask if your lover is married, because I'm 99% sure he is. So, there's no point in asking for advice, you've made the decision. May your child be alive and well and may your new husband not leave you for another mistress. every married woman knows that it is not right, but like any other woman, guilty of your sins is a wife. I'm not going to ask if your lover is married, because I'm 99% sure he is. So, there's no point in asking for advice, you've made the decision. May your child be alive and well and may your new husband not leave you for another mistress. every married woman knows that it is not right, but like any other woman, guilty of your sins is a wife. I'm not going to ask if your lover is married, because I'm 99% sure he is. So, there's no point in asking for advice, you've made the decision. May your child be alive and well and may your new husband not leave you for another mistress.
Please, but really and wholeheartedly, keep the child and live with your new husband! I beg you! It will not be easy for you, but in time you will realize how much you have earned. Better late than never. Your current husband cannot have children. He and his parents are angry with you. The deal with the apartment is a clear signal that he is insuring himself, because he probably feels that sooner or later you will leave because of the children. He may try to cry and make you envious that you will finally be happy with a child and another man. But you do not give up in any case. You will have to isolate yourself from it for a while, cut it from the root! Get out an hour early, don't even warn him about it. Just one day while he is in the field take your documents, some clothes and disappear! Don't be fooled that something will change from now on. Even if he gets nicer, this will be hypocritical. Don't you think that he will give you half a house, or that he will make you children? You have taken yours for all these years. He obviously treats you like a second-hand person when he doesn't even take you seriously. Enough. In time, you can meet as friends if you are very sad for him. But you can't have family happiness with such a person. Realize it now. Don't kill a child for selfishness! You swallowed so many frogs in vain! Don't kill a child for selfishness! You swallowed so many frogs in vain! Don't kill a child for selfishness! You swallowed so many frogs in vain!
I think leave your husband, you do not benefit much from him, not that this is the most important thing, but if he does not give support and does not share, and you do not have children for a long time, the child can just come to show you change, I did not understand from the other is the child? The most important thing is to feel happy ...
Save the child and move on with the person holding you! I'm sure you'll be happy!
Hello, I think you should keep the child. Just yanma for when. If you do not have a child - why go back to your husband? It doesn't cost 5 bucks. throw away EVERYTHING, you don't need property and belongings. Get out of this hole you are in as soon as possible. There is another possibility - your husband has been manipulated by his parents and does not realize what position he put you in. But I think it's too late for anything. Success!
It does not matter that the home was acquired with a donation. Once purchased during the marriage you are entitled to half. I tell you this from experience, because my apartment was donated by my father and was in my name and the name of the child. After I got divorced, it turned out that my ex-husband owned half of my share. We transferred his share to the child using a lawyer, not just a notary. Regarding your other question, keep your child no matter which man you live with.
You've been giving out enough for people who haven't appreciated the right time for a fresh start.
Unless your current official husband has made you children at 35, I don't think you should regret starting a new person.
You will always be a stranger in that family. Even to her husband. The feint with the apartment shows very well that there they despise. I don't think it's worth giving him any more chances, especially since he's obviously barren and you won't have children. The child is a great joy, but also a great care. If the new person is really serious to you, then this would be a really wonderful new beginning, and with a child next to you. It all depends on how serious your new friend is, and whether you can handle a child alone if he decides to dump you.
Well, in my opinion, get a divorce if you are not happy with your husband and start a new family. You don't write much about the new man, do you love him, he loves you, your relationship, what he thinks, I hope he's not just a substitute or something. There is something I don't know if you know that your husband will be the father of the child even if you divorce immediately! I wish you happiness!
Hello! I'm a 15-year-old girl, but my mother and father have things like yours upstairs, except that my father drinks and the apartment is not donated. My father was very influenced by his mother. Whatever he told him, it happened. God forgive her, she died in August and everything went well, but anyway. Before her grandmother died, every night she raised scandals with her mother about her money, why the apartment was written in her name, and he paid it off. Let's just say I have a little experience from what I saw at home and I'll tell you one thing, don't kill this unborn child, give him a chance at life. Go to your man who loves you and dump your husband, you still can't wait for them to die for everything to be okay. Live your life. And I called to her mother that I, my father, and she would be fine, but she didn't believe me and stayed with my father, and I told her that in 2008 and I've seen a lot so far. I advise you to keep this child and watch him and your loved one, and if he does not want it and separate (God forbid) raise him alone and show him that he has a very strong mother. Therefore, forward, as I call "Forward with the horns and you will overcome everything!", So let's live once. :) Regards Rumi (Ru)
What kind of question at all? of course you will keep it and start fresh. Otherwise, what will you gain besides another disappointment? Keep in mind that I am firmly against infidelity in general, but in this case even I justify your action. No wonder, you will be very wrong if you stay with the man, even more so if you remove the child. I know how it is in the village and how they will talk, but if you do everything just so they don't talk to you, you will be unhappy all your life, and they won't care much.
Abe, I sympathize with you in principle and stand by your side, but the way your life has developed clearly shows that in the end your husband and his parents had every right to feint on you with the property. It is clear that they are not a flower to smell, but at least if you separate from your husband, he will at least lose nothing financially, because if, in addition to so many years of time, he loses your savings and those of his parents invested in the apartment - Well, it would be too brutal. I don't know if you will be able to take something from the apartment, but it is best for you to end your exhausted marriage and live with the father of your child. There will certainly be choral tales, but know that in the end every miracle is really for 3 days, so very soon people will not comment on you, and some will even take your side. You have obviously made the decision to look after your own interests, so you have no choice but to keep doing it. You are even at least 7-8 years late, but better late than later or never. :)
Does the new man know you're pregnant? Is he available? Is he ready to live with you? Otherwise you have to leave your husband, you have been unhappy for 2 decades, it will not get better. You're getting a divorce! And without any scandals with him. You're just leaving his life.
Save the child. At the age of 35, this is a gift from God and Fate. Your only and last chance. Nothing else matters. Even if your friend gets scared and withdraws, still keep your child and become a mother. Everything else, in time, will be fine and will be fine. If the child is not from your husband, do not give in to manipulation, because there are such examples in life - he can offer you to stay with him and raise the child together, regardless of the fact that the biological father is different. Finish this man once and for all. Good luck and be brave! The greatest happiness in the world awaits you!
Save your child, maybe the fact that you haven't had children with your husband for so many years is a sign that he is not the MAN for you. And at 35 you can start a new life. Good luck be happy.
Drop your apartment and your husband. Let him live there alone. Didn't he burn his job? !! You look after the child and if there is a possibility to reunite with his father, I wish you a lot of happiness. Children are a gift. No apartments, money and a bunch of nonsense can compare to them. And my husband is annoyed by his act. He can be completely happy now. The apartment will not share it with you. You will be hooked there alone, and you dear be happy!
1. Donations are contested in court and fall to 90%. 2. The property was acquired DURING marriage, no matter how. So, no matter how you look at it with a decent lawyer, you can easily claim 50% of the property.
Of course, you will get rid of those energy vampires who have confused your thinking and life! Even better alone than badly accompanied! Have faith in yourself and start reading books that will change your thinking and look more cheerfully and boldly at this short moment - Life! And I'm 35- I'm alone. I am glad for you that you will have a child. And don't forget to smile. If there is a desire, there is always a way - never lose optimism and faith - especially in yourself! Success!
Congratulations first !!!! Fate has decided for you whether to separate or not. I was in a similar situation, now I am in an more advanced pregnancy and I am very happy that it happened. No, pay attention to the negative comments, they aim to kill their complexes instead of sincerely giving you advice. Do not remove the child because you will regret it. You will return to your husband for a second chance and he will disappoint you again. Then you will regret killing the innocent child for him and you will get depressed. If the second man is decent, start a family with him. And don't forget that your husband is in a weak position because in case of divorce you have the right to half. Do you keep any documents that you gave half the money? Because if you gave him the money by hand and he bought the apartment without you appearing anywhere, I don't know, then you should talk to a lawyer. And about the money in the bank, tell him that you supported the household and he saved his money. Among me, you deserve half, seek your rights. Not to mention that by law this child is his and will be his heir. Things are in your hands. Consult a lawyer as soon as possible, to tell you what opportunities you have in front of you and then make a decision. If I were your friend, I would advise you - split up and start over. You're not an adult, you're just rooted in this relationship, half your life is there, but that doesn't mean it's worth continuing. And keep your child, you will be very happy with him and he does not deserve to be killed because of this man who is obviously very selfish. Good luck!!! Not to mention that by law this child is his and will be his heir. Things are in your hands. Consult a lawyer as soon as possible, to tell you what opportunities you have in front of you and then make a decision. If I were your friend, I would advise you - split up and start over. You're not an adult, you're just rooted in this relationship, half your life is there, but that doesn't mean it's worth continuing. And keep your child, you will be very happy with him and he does not deserve to be killed because of this man who is obviously very selfish. Good luck!!! Not to mention that by law this child is his and will be his heir. Things are in your hands. Consult a lawyer as soon as possible, to tell you what opportunities you have in front of you and then make a decision. If I were your friend, I would advise you - split up and start over. You're not an adult, you're just rooted in this relationship, half your life is there, but that doesn't mean it's worth continuing. And keep your child, you will be very happy with him and he does not deserve to be killed because of this man who is obviously very selfish. Good luck!!! but that doesn't mean it's worth continuing. And keep your child, you will be very happy with him and he does not deserve to be killed because of this man who is obviously very selfish. Good luck!!! but that doesn't mean it's worth continuing. And keep your child, you will be very happy with him and he does not deserve to be killed because of this man who is obviously very selfish. Good luck!!!
Start anew! Life has given you a second chance, you finally have the opportunity to be a mother and have a person who loves you. Come on! Don't give up on love! And you know that your husband will never change, or if he does, it will be for the worse, not for the better. That's why you have the right to be happy! Act now because the years go by and after 40 it will be even harder for you to start your life anew. And now in your mid-30s you're still young and you have a chance to change things. I know it's scary, but do it! Success! You deserve it, you deserve to be a mother, to be a loved and happy woman!
I want to tell you that your husband is in a very disadvantaged position. At first, this child will not even be his until he divorces. His or not there is no court to stand on his side, if you can prove that you lived there - address registration, it follows that you are legally entitled to remain in it until the child reaches the age of majority (if of course you decide to you make him dirty). But I wrote to you above. Don't poison your life with small souls. Have you ever considered that your husband may have a problem with having children? A problem that not only you know about and that they have decided in a heap to deprive you of your rights. Maybe they knew and thought that when you found out you would leave him.
First for the apartment - you gave half of the amount, and then you are not entitled to half of the apartment ... his father allegedly made him a donation ??? This is dishonest and completely disrespectful to you, and your husband is a mold when he allows it to happen. However, the good news is that a DONATION CAN BE DISPUTED. f. you can challenge it and claim half as it should and get it. A transfer of money from an account or documents can be seen, as witnesses also confirm, talking to a lawyer. You didn't sign a waiver document (as they used to try to make me - my father-in-law was pushing a sheet for me - to sign a waiver; it was a sale, but I told him it wasn't in my favor and I wouldn't I signed and stayed that way, now I am entitled to half the property because it was acquired during the marriage ... it will remain for our children one day, I will not carry it to the grave). Second, give the new relationship a chance (although it wasn't right for that to happen if you're married ... not divorced; you remember what I mean; but that tells me that between you and your husband you have nothing left and that's why you decided to get in touch with someone else). The child is something priceless - do not remove it. Give him a chance to grow up in a family environment with a man who loves and appreciates you. If something could have changed for the better in your current marriage, it would have changed a hundred times so far, and your husband is obviously childless .... he has no illusions. ж47 Give him a chance to grow up in a family environment with a man who loves and appreciates you. If something could have changed for the better in your current marriage, it would have changed a hundred times so far, and your husband is obviously childless .... he has no illusions. ж47 Give him a chance to grow up in a family environment with a man who loves and appreciates you. If something could have changed for the better in your current marriage, it would have changed a hundred times so far, and your husband is obviously childless .... he has no illusions. ж47
Not the girlfriends, not us here, the strangers, but the god of the universe and whoever you believe there have given you all the answers .... new love new life in your womb something expected and desired .... just because you are 35 there is no time to wait and to hope in your husband. don't stare at common things to lose happiness. I'm not saying it doesn't matter how many years have passed, but let him embrace the panels and you embrace your child and your new life. I wish you courage
From the description (I read it several times) it is not clear to you who you are actually pregnant with - your husband or your new love .... Maybe it's the new one? If so, no wonder.
Pray to GOD to lead you on the path HE wants you to walk. Trust HIM. Ask the GO to help you. Don't hurt the child, whatever happens, please don't kill him. If you have a Bible, start reading. Read always. Always pray to GOD. Only HE can help you. GOD bless you and your loved ones. Amen. If there is something - skype: ************ / Moderator7 - We do not publish contact information.
Oh! GG is riding the broom again!
If the person you are a child of loves you, fuck everything, collect your pears and enjoy life, you have had enough pain and deprivation and you live one life :)
Without even being afraid or doubting and wandering, keep your child and start a new life with the new man, with him if he wants you to be together or alone but clean. If necessary, leave the city where you live. It is not easy, but it is a new beginning for a new life. If I were you, I would do that and I wouldn't even think for a second. Act !!!
Now, I am younger than you (I am 26 years old) and I will listen to you if you want. In this rotten life, you have to be selfish to be happy. Personally, I am not like that, but I am convinced that it is so, precisely because I have suffered. From what you have written, it seems that you have married a mother's son, no matter how strong and independent he is. If he is a real man he will stand up for you, I will not listen to "mom" or "daddy". You say all your life you wanted this child and a nice man next to you, you obviously found him if you didn't tell him about the child, do it and see how he will react, if he is happy and ready to raise him with you WHAT ARE YOU WAITING for, isn't that is the purpose of life, to continue it with a person who loves you. If you remove this child, and give the mother's son another chance, you will simply regret it for the rest of your life. DON'T BE A FOOL. The relationship of " mom and "dad" to you will not change, respectively, and that of your husband because he tries to please them not you ("the love of his life": D). RUN TO LOVE girl (woman) at 35 you don't have time for children's games. PS Changes are a good thing :) I would very much like to know in time how you acted, I hope I will understand somehow. :)
Thank you very much for the comments, you helped me a lot. for those who have not understood me, I just want to add that the child is not from my husband, but from the new man, who is not married and generally wants us to be together and be a family, he loves me very much, but he also has the courage to tell me that after all, the last decision is mine and will comply with it. I thank him a lot, I feel wanted and loved with him, no matter that at the moment it is a little difficult for me because of the developed things. As for the apartment, I want to tell you that I never had any claims for it, because when we got married I made the foolishness to buy from my parents my home / floor of a house / with purchase and sale and to live with them in it. Unfortunately, since we bought my hometown, it has not become OUR home, it has never been repaired, nothing has been touched ... and so on. I didn't threaten him with divorce, so that he would be afraid that I would take the new apartment given to him by his father, I just wanted to be protected that he would not throw me out on the street tomorrow because we already had a lot of problems and I thought about leaving it but still not gathering strength. We don't live in the new apartment, because he has been finding excuses not to furnish it for a year and a half, maybe on purpose, but at the same time he claims how much he loves me? I don't trust him anymore, and you just gave me the strength to fight, I wandered a lot. I have always told my husband that money does not make a person happy and that a golden apartment furnished in the latest fashion will not make us happy because its foundations are rotten, but he does not believe me. I took out a loan so I could get a divorce, he didn't believe until the end that I would really do it. It's a pity that if I hadn't withdrawn the money, he wouldn't have taken me seriously to this day, because he was calm - she has no money, nothing to do. I already know what I want and that is to start a new life with this child who is not guilty of anything. Thank you very much.
From number 22. I am very happy! Congratulations on your decision and go ahead!