Hello ... I share my story / and I don't know why / I have had 3 relationships in my life / platonic / and nothing special ... At 17 years old. I met him ... It wasn't something special, but he attracted me somehow ... Without wondering who with whom, how and why ... our relationship started ... the other thing happened very quickly / you remember ...: ), and it was my first time /, but I'm not sorry anyway. Our relationship lasted 5 years. during most of which we lived together, ie we were almost not separated. Our relationship was calm / without going out, without friends / only us ... It suited me, I didn't complain ... From home to work - from work at home ... and so for 5 years / here and there I went out, whereupon he grumbled a lot about what ... but I just wanted to /. When I went out, nothing happened, of course, with friends, fun and nothing more. There were, of course, disputes and jealousy, and so on. / normal things for a relationship /. After these 5 years. we decided to get married ... and so it happened ... the wedding went wonderfully and I was already pregnant / there is no more wonderful feeling than in this world /. The days and months after the wedding were normal ... there were quarrels and arguments again (to describe how happy we were, I don't know, but it sounds banal to me). A wonderful child was born, who was cared for with a lot of love / on my part / ... my husband became somehow cold. It did not irritate me that he was cold with me, but that he was drawn to the child / what is the fault of the sweetheart /. Anyway, two years passed during which I raised the child alone, my parents / wonderful people / helped me from time to time, no interest from his parents. It's time to start working. He consulted them / important decisions, not that I haven't grumbled sometimes / we decided that from a financial point of view it's better to start work. We live in a small town and finding a job is difficult to understand. But one day it happened that through acquaintances I found a job in the neighboring town, and the reward was good. So after a few days I started working ... and the problems started, of course. A jealousy began (and there was one before, but not like that), of the kind of you and your boss, you and your colleagues. And they are all nice / I respect my colleagues a lot / elderly people and with families / not that there are no such cases in history /, but I do not see myself in the role of the woman who spoils families. I don't think of myself as anyone, but at least I see myself as a person with morals and some principles. Understandably finding a job, my income rose and my self-esteem / in normal doses of course / friends, relatives for me were still the same, and I had not changed for them, I just became a different person, more beautiful, more confident, more responsible ... Of course, these things attract men and I did not deprive myself of attention, but I've NEVER abused it, it's just not in my style. Of course, like everyone, I had a skype and facebook page, where there were also compliments, but of the most harmless variety. And I'm not a person who, when someone compliments him or invites him for coffee, I put my sign on married. Still, I consider myself sensible so as not to cross certain boundaries ... nooo ... according to my husband, this is not true ... and it started ... some insults, some miracles, a total collapse of self-confidence and self-respect . And me from home to work, from work to home / we traveled with my husband /, going out once or twice a year and for what ... For the least encroachments, beatings, persecutions ... And I never understood where the reason was ... Yes, I am in contact with many people / women, men / and what of it. To stop contact with men so that no one thinks of me as ... what ... as he is ... no one has the right to judge me if he doesn't know me (at least I do). I must emphasize that I have not been beaten or taken to hospital, but this is no excuse for the things he has been doing to me ... And this for three years ... and what was this patience for / to ask someone / , no one is to blame. It was not do not eat, you will gain weight / I secretly ate /, in the sink there are a few plates / pig one slap /, it is not swept / pig one slap /, knocks on the ground and what not ... I have no left no self-respect ... persecution in the middle of the night ... etc. One evening the persecution was repeated, this time I went out with the child .... iii ... END. I just said no ... I took my child and went to a dormitory without considering anyone or anything, so far I have always been afraid that I would have nowhere to go, how I would manage alone with a child, etc. something ... better alone and calm than well-insured but unhappy. I'm still so young and who will take my years back ... Despite everything, after a while I decided to try, but without going back ... to see each other to see how it will happen ... BUT ... control over my life went on and at the first moment when I felt it I withdrew ... and I decided that this would be the end ... we look for each other, we hear each other, we ask ourselves HOW ARE YOU? and so ... A few days ago my husband went to the hospital and I went to see him ... I was very worried, so he is the father of my child ... on the part of my parents a worry, on the part of his accusations against me, I'm almost to blame, and they know very well that their son kicked me out, but still ... DEVILS ... And my husband once again insulted me by asking me WHY ARE YOU HERE? -and I: Because of the child and from a human point of view ... I'm looking for him to ask how he is ... I'm really worried ... I didn't say I would come back I'm just worried, but ... maybe I'm wrong ... there is such an expectation in his eyes ... IT'S BAD ... BUT I JUST DON'T WANT TO BACK, because he won't change as much as I want to. So you tell me, can such naivety, stupidity on my part? Thank you! I didn't say I would come back, I'm just worried, but ... maybe I'm wrong ... there's such an expectation in his eyes ... IT'S BAD ... BUT I JUST DON'T WANT TO BACK, because he won't changed as much as I wanted. So you tell me, can such naivety, stupidity on my part? Thank you! I didn't say I would come back, I'm just worried, but ... maybe I'm wrong ... there's such an expectation in his eyes ... IT'S BAD ... BUT I JUST DON'T WANT TO BACK, because he won't changed as much as I wanted. So you tell me, can such naivety, stupidity on my part? Thank you!
Answers 12
You have come across a unique person - a judge and a chauvinist. There is no point in poisoning your life with it. True, he is the father of your child, but there is no point in cutting your life in half and being with him. Leave him now and be happy and free. You better stay away from him. Move away and live happily with your child. I'm sorry for the strong words, but one day you will realize that you did the right thing.
RESPECT!!!! I'm telling you a unique woman! I don't know, I really don't know what to tell you, I read the story in one breath and just ... you are a sane person, a strong person and even though you have that fear, you have that note of determination with which people change their lives 180 degrees. You are not naive and you are not stupid, you are just a person, you have feelings, fears, longings and dreams ... it is normal for these human habits to hinder us and make us tolerate such madness. Thank goodness you realize the whole situation correctly, but never blame yourself for anything in this story, you once had a logical explanation for your actions. Good luck, health for you and the child! Zu-Za
Look, the problem is not in you and this can be seen everywhere. I don't know, but somehow, a great respect and esteem for you was born in me, maybe because you are real in life, which is great. And that's what I'm writing about now and I want to help you. You are just a good woman, loving and caring. But you are not naive. Your husband is very lucky because he has you, but unfortunately he does not see him. He doesn't see what kind of person you are, he doesn't see what a big heart you have. He, unfortunately, has fallen into the trap of jealousy. So much so that he hated you. He imagines that you are cheating on him or at least that you are flirting with colleagues, friends, etc. He doesn't believe you, and it's because of this terrible jealousy he's accumulated for no reason. It's not your fault. It is normal to have jealousy, but there is also love. But he has lost control of his jealousy, and jealousy already controls him. Instead of the jealousy weakening over the years, it always intensifies in him. He hasn't always known you well enough to trust you. And these slaps and this bad attitude and attacks - because of jealousy is, you can see. And despite all this, you go to him for a visit to the hospital because you care about him. But he treats you the same way, he looks at you with the same zealous look. He does not see that you, despite everything, are by his side and, above all, that you are giving him a chance to change, because you still love him, but unfortunately he does not realize it. Talk to him seriously. Because your child will one day ask "Where is Daddy" ... and what will you say? ; (Tell this to your husband. Tell him to realize it in time. Because sooner or later you will stop seeing and even hearing from him if he continues to be jealous and hates you. You will look for and find another who will really appreciate you and there will be no drop of jealousy towards you, or at least his jealousy towards you will be as much as one drop. And your husband? He will realize what he had, but he will realize it later and he will regret it a lot and he will suffer even more after he thinks of his child, which he was not interested in, as he was not interested in you. He will realize that he has lost 2 huge values in his life and for what? Because of his stupid and excessive jealousy. Good luck darling and don't give up. You can change it. Love always wins :) One Boy - 20 years old. which he was not interested in, just as he was not interested in you. He will realize that he has lost 2 huge values in his life and for what? Because of his stupid and excessive jealousy. Good luck darling and don't give up. You can change it. Love always wins :) One Boy - 20 years old. which he was not interested in, just as he was not interested in you. He will realize that he has lost 2 huge values in his life and for what? Because of his stupid and excessive jealousy. Good luck darling and don't give up. You can change it. Love always wins :) One Boy - 20 years old.
To number 1 by the author ... You are very right and your words are not strong at all, but real ... the truth itself ... and thank you for the kind words!
To number 2 by the author ... Thank you ... unfortunately until recently I could not look at myself as you describe me ... I was used to the idea that I was almost some garbage. And it was my feelings and fears that prevented me from making the decision earlier ... And I have to stop apologizing for other people's mistakes.
To number 3 from the author ... Thank you too ... And I was very surprised that such a comment has been written for 20 years. boy ... WELL DONE ... RESPECT ... The question "Where's Daddy?" For now, the child knows that he lives with his mother, and his father lives in his house. Until I love him ... ??? I don't know if there are such feelings left in me ... that there is respect ... there is, but that's it. And it's only his fault, you can't expect someone you hurt to love you like that.
You are definitely not what you think and flaunt, despite the pubertal comments above. You think of something ("good", "naive"), you play it like that, but this is not your essence, but a great conquest (some phrases in your writing unambiguously betray it). The good man is not naive, but aware. To be good you need inner strength, and the offending person is neither strong nor aware, at least - good. On the other hand, the naive person's self-esteem, friends, flirtations on Facebook and coffee without the label "married" do not grow along with income. So: what you wrote is your version and your self-esteem. It will be very interesting to listen to the other side with its version, as well as the assessments of others (but not your parents - for them you are undoubtedly ideal), because there is a very big difference between what a person is considered to be and what he really is. Your big mistake is that you connected your life with someone still young and green. You did not have the opportunity to get to know people in general, the opposite sex, yourself if you wanted, nor to gain the necessary life experience, nor to choose a suitable and appropriate partner for your nature. People come together in a similar and mutually attractive way, rather than catching the first person you meet (or hers, respectively) and then trying to change it. But you are still very young. Good luck next time! And don't go out in front of people saying you're good and naive - it's grotesque. the other sex, yourself if you want, neither to gain the necessary life experience, nor to choose a suitable and appropriate to your nature partner. People come together in a similar and mutually attractive way, rather than grabbing the first person you meet (or hers you) and then trying to change it. But you are still very young. Good luck next time! And don't go out in front of people saying you're good and naive - it's grotesque. the other sex, yourself if you want, neither to gain the necessary life experience, nor to choose a suitable and appropriate to your nature partner. People come together in a similar and mutually attractive way, rather than catching the first person you meet (or hers, respectively) and then trying to change it. But you are still very young. Good luck next time! And don't go out in front of people saying you're good and naive - it's grotesque.
To number 7 by the author ... I do not flaunt what I am, I know myself well or just now I started to get to know each other ... and in my story / if you read it / I / I wrote that I see people like yourself ... obviously you see me as yourself ... or ... ??? you know, people are like coals, if they don't burn you they will blacken you ... I am writing this in connection with the other side ... for them I am the wrong, the corrupt one / and there is such a specimen in their family / and of course they kill complexes on my back ... and about whether I take over or not ... many people have told me that, and all of them people from whom you can't hear a kind word, ie cold ... it's me I am not and I do not want to be a cold person ... If someone does good to someone consciously knowing what will happen to him, he would not rush to do it at all ... Naively the good does good only because it is good, and consciously the good one does it either for profit or ... all this ... / my opinion /. And this with self-confidence, friends, etc. ... how did you come up with it, with the growth of my income I did not write that who knows what has changed, qualitatively yes, but not quantitatively ... ??? Oh, a man for himself for a while is what is imposed on him / in my case /, and when you realize you really see yourself ... for the people around you it is never more ... And this, that I've connected my life since I was a child with someone ... oooh, I'm not sorry at all ... I haven't looked for much ... we've moved from city to city, I've seen, but I haven't taken advantage ... I praise no one, the fact that someone can't get rid of the fact that there is something more is his personal and mental problem ... / and everyone is more for himself and I respect that in people / /my opinion/. And this with self-confidence, friends, etc. ... how did you come up with it, with the growth of my income I did not write that who knows what has changed, qualitatively yes, but not quantitatively ... ??? Oh, a man for himself for a while is what is imposed on him / in my case /, and when you realize you really see yourself ... for those around you a man is never more ... And this, that I've connected my life since I was a child with someone ... oooh, I'm not sorry at all ... I haven't looked for much ... we've moved from city to city, I've seen, but I haven't taken advantage ... I praise no one, the fact that someone can't get rid of the fact that there is something more is his personal and mental problem ... / and everyone is more for himself and I respect that in people / /my opinion/. And this with self-confidence, friends, etc. ... how did you come up with it, with the growth of my income I did not write that who knows what has changed, qualitatively yes, but not quantitatively ... ??? Oh, a man for himself for a while is what is imposed on him / in my case /, and when you realize you really see yourself ... for those around you a man is never more ... And this, that I've connected my life since I was a child with someone ... oooh, I'm not sorry at all ... I haven't looked for much ... we've moved from city to city, I've seen, but I haven't taken advantage ... I praise no one, the fact that someone does not get rid of the fact that there is something more is his personal and mental problem ... / and everyone is better for himself and I respect that in people / with the growth of my income I did not write that who knows what has changed, qualitatively yes, but not quantitatively ... ??? Oh, a man for himself for a while is what is imposed on him / in my case /, and when you realize you really see yourself ... for those around you a man is never more ... And this, that I've connected my life since I was a child with someone ... oooh, I'm not sorry at all ... I haven't looked for much ... we've moved from city to city, I've seen, but I haven't taken advantage ... I praise no one, the fact that someone does not get rid of the fact that there is something more is his personal and mental problem ... / and everyone is better for himself and I respect that in people / with the growth of my income I did not write that who knows what has changed, qualitatively yes, but not quantitatively ... ??? Oh, a man for himself for a while is what is imposed on him / in my case /, and when you realize you really see yourself ... for the people around you it is never more ... And this, that I've connected my life since I was a child with someone ... oooh, I'm not sorry at all ... I haven't looked for much ... we've moved from city to city, I've seen, but I haven't taken advantage ... I praise no one, the fact that someone can't get rid of the fact that there is something more is his personal and mental problem ... / and everyone is more for himself and I respect that in people /
Написах коментара си именно, защото се досетих, че преди не си можела да гледаш на себе си като такъв човек. Едно е да се родиш със самочувствие, гордост, борбеност и благодарение на това никога да не са те мачкали, а съвсем друго е докато си мачкан да си изградиш тези неща. Като цяло е трудно за един човек да се изправи и да изкрещи мнението и позицията си, когато всички го сочат с пръст, обвиняват го и му се присмиват. Но много се радвам, че си от жените, които говорят за това, така, сякаш всичко е заровено в пръстта. Зу-За
To number 9 by the author ... Before I looked at myself ... rather from the point of view of others / my husband mostly /, they told me how they see me like that ... without a personal opinion. From now on it is clear to me that my opinion and position will be quite difficult to break through me, but at least I try to defend my right to a human being ... And for pointing a finger ... it is clear, everyone points the one who, in his opinion, is lower or almost failed - and that has nothing to do ... It is very easy, especially for those whose conscience is not very clear, but while according to them there is worse than them - this is welcome!
I don't know how you can even contact the person who BILL you? !! He treated you like a slave, he didn't care about your child, it is clear that in time he will attack your child as well ... Leave him alone, you don't deserve such rubbish, let him die alone!
To number 11 from the author ... I can't stop the contacts normally because of the child ... he will understand what it is about anyway, but she is still young and does not realize what is happening around her, I left her to live in the nursery your world without problems ... for now ... I've left him alone already, but a hard word like "let him die" is very painful ... just like a thought. Thank you!