Hello readers! It's really hard for me to write about what you're going to read, but I really need advice, even though I know what your comments would be. The story begins with the fact that I met an exceptional being, one I had hoped to come across after a difficult separation I had experienced a few months before. Our acquaintance was very atypical, but it still happened. In the beginning, it all came down to talking on the phone, because of the circumstances - I study and he works ... Until one day he admitted to me that he was married. Things were not going well with his wife, their marriage was open at times. We met once, then again and again, and each time I liked him more and more. At our last meeting, he told me that he would settle down alone, without his wife. The bad thing was that he said "ALONE", he didn't want anyone. I, for my part, had explained to him that I am serious and looking for something real, not just bedtime love, but a little later, with all the sincerity I appreciate, he admitted to me that he could not offer me what I was looking for, but he wanted me, as I wanted him. (though in every sense of the word), in other respects.
The idea: I still don't like it, but I feel that things are going in that direction. I want to stop them because I don't want to cry at some point because of stupid mistakes, but I also don't want to stop things with him because I hope he will be with me at some point. Please do not judge me for what I am or am not. I just want friendly advice from you, because what's happening is starting to strain me - I want it, but I can't, because it's as if I'm meeting a beam on his side. For the record, there are no children, so that makes me hope that after a while I could talk about "Us" and not "me and Him." I will be extremely happy for your opinion! :)
Answers 26
Мила, минала съм по абсолютно същия път! Първо, искам да ти кажа да не обръщаш внимание на всякакви негативни коментари, много хора тук са комплексирани от собствения си живот и се опитват да разпръскват негативната си енергия навсякъде. Едно те съветвам - НЕ преспивай с него, колкото и да го желаеш!!! Така ще му покажеш, че си лесна и няма да си интересна. Вместо това му покажи, че го цениш като човек, подай му рамо, когато се нуждае от подкрепа, бори се за него! И ако е писано, той ще види всеотдайността ти и ще отвърне на чувствата ти. Ако пък не, ще продължиш напред с усмивка, само той ще изгуби. Имай си едно на ум, че може да не се влюби, че може да не поиска връзка, но не се отказвай, докато не разбереш, че няма вече смисъл. И не си лягай с него през това време, ако той иска това - зарязвай го по-добре! Ще боли, но ще е за предпочитане пред болката от това да се чувстваш използвана като парцал.
Love does not ask! We have no right to judge you. I think you should wait a while. He has soon ended his marriage, he needs time to be in a more serious relationship ...
If you have already printed it, what prevents you from trying it physically, since you already like it mentally? If he liked everything too, he might have "Us." But, "I study" is very relative, you better show your age so we know how to think!
In general, married men do not leave their halves. Even more so if they have children. Then the other side is a thrill for them. I don't think such a relationship has a future. It doesn't start clean on the part of the man.
I didn't understand you. Do you understand each other? I don't like him - I told him I was serious, maybe one day I'll talk about us. I don't just want sex. But I want it. What do you expect from him - since, you don't love him? Let's say you live together. Are you sure you will love him madly? Or you will just live together. If you just live together, you don't think you deserve anything better. So that you don't cry one day from your stupid mistakes. Before you do anything, you need to know why you are doing it. And you're not sure you want the result. Then how do you expect your actions to be motivated. At such a moment, just stop and wait for the time to show. But until you are sure that the actions you will take make sense, nothing will happen. And if you expect us to tell you what you want - this cannot and should not happen. In general, you need to answer the questions: What I want? Why do I want it? It is good to imagine things as early as possible. To think, are you ready, to be in this position. When you answer these questions, only then can you act. Otherwise it will not happen.
Well fuck, so what. But you want a relationship, he doesn't want a relationship - that's more of a problem. Some people just get sick of relationships for one reason or another, sorry. Some people need us to be ME, not US. A woman.
Some clever man had said that two people come together not to look each other in the eye, but to look in the same direction. You are obviously for the first / wrong / option. Do you have any idea of the male psyche and physiology? What do they have to do with his mentality and behavior? Why and how unstable is his marriage? You don't seem to have, so read on these topics, here and elsewhere. Talk to more mature people too - both men and women / but close, not with everyone they meet /, these are normal things. Take your time, but look around often, or he'll be gone. Because, as you / you / want / without a bed, only lilac nights /, this is very likely ...
Well, what can I tell you, it's not good at all, besides, as far as I understand, this man has no intention of parting with his wife. If you only agree to sex, you must first know what you want from him and whether you are ready if you have to end it. And I have hidden desires for a man who is married, in fact, the sexual contact itself does not seem wrong to me, but the thought that the man is married makes me feel disgusting. Mine will always end because it won't happen, or so I think, but you're in a difficult situation. If you have the opportunity, you must be sure that you are mature and strong enough for such relationships and their consequences.
Well, the man in plain text tells you that he doesn't want a serious relationship, and you're still pushing for something serious. Well, you'll see each other, you'll sink even deeper, and I doubt he'll change his mind once he says he doesn't want anything serious. And who will end up being fucked? And then you'll roar on the forums about how nasty men are, as if he didn't tell you directly.
To clarify some things about the situation: I study at university, he has no children, but he is not divorced. On the subject of love - I still do not feel love because I do not want to allow myself to indulge in such strong feelings from now on (I know that it will eventually happen, but for now I am trying to suppress it). And I know what I want from him, but at this point I don't think he wants it.
To clarify some things about the situation: I study at university, he has no children, but he is not divorced. On the subject of love - I still do not feel love because I do not want to allow myself to indulge in such strong feelings from now on (I know that it will eventually happen, but for now I am trying to suppress it). And I know what I want from him, but at this point I don't think he wants it.
To comment 1, extremely inadequately said, I am a man and if I show my feelings and they are made inaccessible to me, my feelings evaporate, it is absolute nonsense that if a woman pulls, men accept her as "decent". pffff
I was very angry with number 12, and how do you understand them from people's stories, who was right. And they can tell me what you do with this one, he comes from a small town / village, he doesn't have a prestigious position, he is not a muscular man, what do you like about him ... what is it for you? If I like a person, if I have seen something that others can't, why shouldn't I try it with him, if I put a label on him and behave biased in the beginning, I will only fail this connection for its further development. A woman may have slept with only one man, and by the fact that she is not a virgin, you already define her as a light woman, right? A lot depends on how old she is, because young women pretend to be more open than the other way around. Many young women are ashamed to admit that they are, for example, virgins or with past experience because there are men who do not want to deal with women without enough experience as for a more serious relationship. Women without enough experience generally do not know exactly how to behave in a relationship, this is normal since they did not have a basis for comparison, the same applies to men. This is the biggest mistake, number 1 is right, these men like you are few, the woman how to judge in the beginning what kind of women you like and what impression you will be left with.
Number 12. You describe it as if you are showing feelings so that she can sleep with you. And if he refuses to sleep with you, you lose interest. Yes, but wanting one and loving it are different things. Men should not love with their penis. That's why number 14 is rightly angry with you. Besides, you describe the whole comment on number 1 as ridiculous. And it also mentions not to be in a hurry to believe people's words. Number 14 is right, examine the man personally. You may not have wanted to say that, but of course. On the other hand number 14. I don't know why older people are made more closed. In my opinion, the right strategy for women (probably for men, but I don't know) is to show how much they want a partner. To reveal a few feelings. Be the active party. Young people have not been so rejected and they do not have such a great instinct to protect themselves. They and therefore, they are often more attractive. Even if young people do not have experience, they do not know how to behave - but that is why they are more relaxed. Their attitude is: I love you, I want you - that's why they are more inclined to keep their partner. How can a woman judge in the beginning what kind of women you like and what impression you will be left with - And why a woman should know what kind of women a man likes. To be able to resemble this type of women? But if this type is not natural for the woman, too soon, she will feel discomfort and this will affect their relationship. Young people do not ask the man what he likes - they are natural, they behave because they are. As a result, they may not be noticed, feelings may not appear at all. But if they appear, they will be much stronger and more durable. Precisely because there is no such compulsion, there is no mask. We older men also have a bitter experience in relationships and we are also afraid that now they will pull one for us. That is why when a woman withdraws from us, shows no interest, so as not to think of it as easy, we also lose interest. Not that we don't want her, but how do we know she won't call us brash and persecutors. Besides, our dignity is collapsing, look, I'm trying, but I only get feedback. If she doesn't want to be with me, I won't harass her. So, as with the hens, run - but look back a little, if we catch up with you, the hen even finally stops running. It is the bitter experience that prevents adults from being together. Although both parties want to love and be loved. But adults are afraid. And now with this uncertainty - to back off, we will do the same. Show us a little green light, and we will wish you much more. That's why young people attract us so much - because with theirs - I want you. And we run not to miss them. And in adults - pulling, we already think we have missed them. But it is one thing to show a person that you would let him into your life, and quite another to sleep with him. I think you should sleep with someone only after you trust her completely. And that takes a lot of meetings. And number 1 is right. You go out with him, be friends, but intimacy must arise from your mutual desire. I think you should sleep with someone only after you trust her completely. And that takes a lot of meetings. And number 1 is right. You go out with him, be friends, but intimacy must arise from your mutual desire. I think you should sleep with someone only after you trust her completely. And that takes a lot of meetings. And number 1 is right. You go out with him, be friends, but intimacy must arise from your mutual desire.
What do you cat the author to sleep with the still MARRIED man ?! Well, let him do it, then she'll be bloody, with an apology. If you have at least a little dignity, girl, take a step back. You want something serious, he doesn't. The end. To sleep with bound men does not suit ladies, but only cheap florists!
Number 16, from 14. "And why should a woman know what kind of women a man likes. In order to be able to resemble this type of women? But if this type is not natural for a woman, too soon, she will feel discomfort and it will be It also..you're right! I meant that since they don't know each other well enough, the woman doesn't know what type the man likes..how she will know, but she doesn't care, she reacts the way she does and it comes from inside, young women do not start with the attitude of a serious relationship. If she has been hurt before, then most likely her behavior will be more withdrawn. For example, I even admitted to understand in some way that it will not be easy with me and I see nothing shameful in this.If she has not been rejected she will behave more casually and will not be afraid to show her feelings.But whether she was rejected or not in no way makes her a woman with rich experience or a few pieces, of course, as I mentioned above. How will it be while having sex to pretend that you have no experience, I do not know but it is probably difficult and Is it possible after you are sexually attracted. And on the other hand, which is more likely to happen, you have done it before, but various factors betray you. Sometimes men also give mixed signals, you start to wonder if you still like it, hold on. is bad..or is just his character..and from there can you accept him as such and why?which is more likely to happen you have done it before but various factors betray you. Sometimes men also give mixed signals, you start to wonder if he still likes you, behaves badly..or just that's his character..a from there can you accept him as such and why?which is more likely to happen you have done it before but various factors betray you. Sometimes men also give mixed signals, you start to wonder if he still likes you, behaves badly..or just that's his character..a from there can you accept him as such and why?
Number 17. To sleep with bound men does not suit ladies, but only cheap florists! "That's how you insult my mistress."
17, this is not a place for desperate wives. 12, the decent ones are definitely inaccessible, and since your 'feelings' evaporate so easily, you are obviously one of the countmen, and they are not decent. The advice of No. 1 is the most correct. It is good for the author to listen to her. women leave, I have several acquaintances who have second families, but there are others who fill in the gaps with the third person.
Do you want an opinion? Cool this desire and give yourself a chance to burn with desire for another, more suitable one! What are you all clinging to in marriage? Married is forbidden - remember it and we will not have to read constant complaints of this kind! With so many free men, you have clung to those who are not available. Do you know what the word "NO" means?
21, there are married people with exhausted relationships, don't feel sorry for them so much, and many of them initiate a new relationship on their own, because their main one is unsuccessful. Give them a chance to have second marriages, people with failed relationships. There is a 2nd and even a 3rd chance.
I do not agree with № 7 by saying "because, as you / you / want / without a bed, only lilac nights /, this is very likely." - a bed does not make a person more beloved or not and if it is about a serious relationship is desirable even on no bed until you see how serious the relationship can be. Also about marriage - why and how unstable was it? "What exactly does that matter?" Marriage does not oblige you to be with a person after all, and it can break down at any time, no one runs away from the good.
№12, not to say that women are obliged NOT to pull, so that your feelings do not evaporate. Scratching scabies has nothing to do with serious feelings. And let me tell you, if a man makes it a condition for me to have sex with him without being convinced that this is the man of my life, I will watch him with the greatest pleasure as his feelings harden. Whoever wants me will be waiting for me, if necessary for 5 years! If not his way - let's see how right he will be, ha ha ... This is exactly the big problem of modern male-female relationships - that sex is done left and right, without anything real and safe between the partners and then a row of tears, a row of snot.
Number 21. The forbidden fruit is sweeter.
Number 22, good jump man! If they are exhausted, why isn't he divorced? Divorce is dear to him, is it convenient for him to have his wife nearby, if he needs it? But how conveniently do you come up with excuses for any nonsense - "exhausted marriage".
Number 27, having the woman around if he needs him, it's like we're talking about his stepmother.
27, his marriage was open - understand exhausted, for some a dead marriage may be nonsense, but for others it may be torture. And divorces are not expensive and pass quite quickly, especially if they are civilized.