Hello, a 22-year-old girl writes to you. I live and work in a small town. I support myself and have been living alone for 3 years. I've never been in love before. I have had 3 relationships, and of the 3 I have always been hurt. My last relationship was with a 35-year-old man (divorced and with a child). This relationship ended 3 months ago. I caught him lying many times, he wrote to others while I slept next to him, but I forgave him because I loved him too much and hoped he would change. I dare say I look good, I'm not bloated. I am also good-natured and always help people as much as I can. I get a good salary and I don't miss anything but being loved. It was very difficult for me to end my last relationship, but I did it with all my might. I was depressed for about 2 weeks. I cried all day and night, I was all swollen, I was even in the hospital, because there was no way I could go to work in that state. One day I just told myself I had to get on my feet and I did. I started living my life, going out with friends again (because my ex-boyfriend forbade me to do that). While I was with him, I only stayed at home. Really, one day I just stopped caring and I felt great. I realized that he had lost me, nor me him. I told myself that I would take a break from the men and that for a while I would look after myself. Yes, but no ... Just when you live well and pay attention only to yourself, someone appears who fails all this. Two months ago a boy started working for us.
I liked him when I saw him, but I didn't do anything because I didn't care and I didn't want to suffer anymore. I noticed that he was looking at me too. 3 weeks ago he found me on social media and wrote to me. The conversation started and we went out the same evening. I forgot to mention that he is a Turk. He is 28 years old and came here to work with his father. We were supposed to be joking, but we had a lot of common topics and we imperceptibly started spending every day together. He, like me, was hurt by his ex-girlfriend. I told him what I had experienced and that I never wanted to experience the same thing again. We have already started to show up together and at work, so now all colleagues know about us. He introduced me to his father, his mother, and his sister. In fact, we are already together. I have never met a sweeter boy than that. He talks about the future with me, he says that life and health, if everything goes well between us, will take me to live with him. I share absolutely everything with him, as he did to me. I have been sleeping with him every night for 10 days now. I became very attached without wanting to.
We had sex for the first time 4 days ago, he didn't press me for anything, and I didn't want to hurry with that. He also tells me that he will never hurt me and that the last thing he wants is to break my heart. I never trusted him because it's hard for me to trust my ex-boyfriend. I always have one thing in mind and I never believe what they tell me. When we have a great time together, we watch movies, cuddle, I just feel in my dream how he hugs me so hard that he will suffocate me. He is the reason I fall asleep and wake up with a smile in the last few days. But from 2 days he started behaving strangely. For example, yesterday it was a day shift, and I will go at night. He hadn't written to me all day. The night I went to work, he was gone, he had left earlier. I wrote to him, asked him what he was doing and why he hadn't told me he was coming home. Whereupon he asked me if he needed to tell me that he was coming home from work. I told him he could just write to keep me calm.
Then he got out of line and most likely fell asleep. I know I may be petty, but is it normal for you not to remember to write to me all day asking me how I am, what am I doing? The other thing is, I keep proving to him that I care about him. Two days ago he told me that he did not get along with his father and could not live under the same roof with him, and now the two live together. He told me that he wanted to find a place to live and live alone. I immediately offered him to move in with me until he found a new place to live. He thanked me and said that he appreciated what I was doing for him, but until then ... He did not answer me whether he would come to me or not. I'm really crazy about thoughts, I feel like I'm crazy. Last night I was sour at work all night just because he didn't write to me during the day. If I was alone, I might have cried, but I was stopped by the fact that there were people around me ...
I don't really know if I'm petty or crazy. On the one hand, I know that if he has no serious intentions towards me, he will not introduce me to his family and friends and introduce me as his girlfriend. But on the other hand, there are days when he doesn't write to me all day ... I don't know what to think anymore, I try to be a liberal person, I don't suffocate him. It's not my style to constantly write to someone where you are, who you are with, etc. But I'm very afraid that I will be hurt again. I can't imagine making me go through the same thing again, which I experienced 2 months ago. I don't want to cry anymore, I don't want to suffer, do I want so much - just to be loved? At times I want to go to them and tell him that we are here, but I stop because I have no good reason. I know that he is in a difficult period at the moment, he doesn't get along with his father, he hasn't taken a salary yet, he has almost no money, but for me this is no reason not to remember to write me at least how I am ... I needed to pour out my soul somewhere, I accept all kinds of advice ...
Answers 13
Why don't you write to him first, but live according to your own expectations that he will write to you first? If you want to know how it is - ask him. I understand your fear of being hurt again, but I don't understand why you're not acting. You have to overcome your fear on your own, without expecting people to do what you want. Sisi
It sounds to me that the problem is inside you. A man does not like when he is given everything ready. Maybe that's why he turned away. You had sex recently. Wasn't it more than mediocre? I did it with a woman with whom I have the feeling that everything is wonderful, then you fuck ... and it's ... some kind of nothing. Then you cool down, not because you want to, but because you're just not happy. There are many reasons. Don't put it on. If he doesn't talk to you and doesn't want to be with you - he's just not your man. And for every man there is a man. Calm down. You're young ... there's so much more to happen to you.
You are a young, romantic girl who wants to be enslaved by a man. Getting paid is good, but what does it have to do with finding love? You will not offer help to men because you risk being used. And you will sink even more, after the gestures you will make and then you will suffer. A man is not helped with material things, even if you can. Only moral support is given to a man. Material things must come from him. This is how the world shines. You will not give up emotionally too quickly. You will write to each other if you have three at a time, until you decide who is better for you. And no, that's not immoral. You are at an age where you have to choose, not suffer that someone has not written to you. Forget about suffering. Where there is a patient, there is no future. And I'll tell you a secret, men don't like women in love. Love inaccessible, to fight for their attention. If they feel that you have sunk, they run away.
Nobody hurts you. You hurt yourself. Until you understand this, you will not be ready for a successful relationship. Success!
A person who does not write to you is not in his thoughts! Nobody is so busy that they don't take 2-3 minutes to scratch something. There is simply no desire. If a man wants to do something, he does it. He probably writes to all kinds of people, colleagues, but not to you. So he just doesn't feel the need to communicate with you. There was a quote that I really like. It was paraphrased that if someone can spend a day without hearing you, so can everyone else. No one is so busy that they can't. He just doesn't want to. It sucks, but it does. I searched, but I felt it as forced communication and it was as if I was interfering with him, a sluggish one. And I stopped, there's no point in wanting to communicate with someone and he doesn't want to. You cause it yourself, you put too much effort and energy. While you're wondering why he doesn't think of you, he can live his life, party, go out with others, and so on. You think about him and he doesn't. If he wants to look for you, he knows how to find you. And what he wrote 3 is true. If you tie a man in a towel, he runs away. But if you step back, if you show that you don't care anymore, he runs after you. If he looks for you, don't blame him for not looking. Just say you went somewhere, even if it's a lie that you were busy with something, a hobby, for example. That is, you did not miss him, and he will expect you to blame him. He'll expect you to make scenes that he didn't look for you, and he'll be infinitely surprised that you don't. You will show him that your life does not revolve around him. Just pretend you didn't notice, but keep one thing in mind and watch his reactions. And be more controlled and less emotional. It may be about character, but you shouldn't be so devoted to everyone. You will wear out while you are still young. And when the man appears for you,
From the author: Hello again, let me tell you how the story unfolded after that. 2 days after I wrote on this site I was on a daily shift. He kept not looking for me, but he came to me at work and said, "Honey, don't even say hello to me anymore while we're at work." "I was shocked, I asked him why. He said that the bosses allegedly remarked to him that he was constantly with me at work and forbade him to stay together. I did not believe this version at all, but I told him well. The next day I did not. I put up with it and wrote to him. I told him I wanted to talk to him if he was free to see me in the evening when I finished work. He told me he was in them and if I wanted to go. So I did. I went to them and I asked him directly what the problem was, he said there was no problem, I told him directly that everything had changed a lot, that he doesn't even remember to write me what I do, how I am, etc., to which he replied that he saw no point in writing to each other while we were at work, that he knew what I was doing, and that I knew what he was doing. I told him how I felt, after which he told me :, My door is always open for you, there is no need to wait for me to write to you, whenever you want you can come to us, whether you want to share something, you have a problem and He also told me that sometimes he needed to be alone with himself, to rethink things about what would happen next. Anyway, I stayed with him to sleep. I was hoping it would change at least a little after I revealed the cards and told him what I didn't like. Yes, but no ... The next day he didn't call me again. I was very nervous and went to bed early in the evening. When I woke up the next morning, I saw that at 12 o'clock in the evening, while I was sleeping, he wrote to me that his cigarettes were over, he wanted cigarettes. I was even angrier, but I didn't answer him. Then he wrote me why I did not answer him. I told him I had watched a movie and I didn't feel like writing. I asked him what I could do after he ran out of cigarettes, and I told him I wasn't a 24-hour store. I also told him that we both knew very well that he wanted something else, but he invented cigarettes as an excuse to go to them. He replied, "I don't want anything from you, if I want something else, I can safely tell you, I just ran out of cigarettes." I got even angrier and told him that since he didn't want anything from me, then yes he doesn't only look for me when there's trouble, and he wrote me okay. That was our last conversation 2 days ago. Nothing since then. I'm very tormented, I feel used, delivered like a fool. What hurts me the most from my last words is that he didn't want anything from me. And until 1 week ago he wanted everything from me, he wanted a serious relationship, he wanted a family ...? I try not to think about it, but I can't. I go out with friends, I don't close myself at home, but in the evening when I go to bed I think that this man lied to me while he was sleeping with me doesn't give me peace. It destroyed my self-confidence, my self-esteem, it leveled me to the ground. And on top of that, he's cheeky. How can he not think of me all day and finally want to bring him cigarettes at 12 in the evening? Several times I go to block it on social networks, but I stop because I don't know what's right. On the one hand, I want him to never write to me at all, but on the other hand, I want him to see my photos, that I'm fine without him. But the feeling of being with an injured ego is awful, I can't believe how it is possible for a person to tell so many lies just to sleep with someone and not feel bad afterwards. Hell, if you just want sex, it's full of whores and prostitutes, why do you have to hurt someone just to have fun? It hurts me, no matter how hard I try to hide it, at work I always try to look good, to always be smiling so that he doesn't understand that I suffer because of him ....
I am 100% sure that he quarreled with his father because of you, his father is urging him to catch a Turk because the Turks insist on it a lot, no matter how much you don't believe it, and that's why he behaves like that, I tell you from experience with my friend , think about it
Have you heard the word "obsession"? Leave a little personal space to the person! He didn't call you. Big deal. Unlike you women, men can only think of one thing at a time. Learn to understand the other, be patient.
At 9, the author, from 7 I wanted sex from you. Why else would someone be looking for you so late for some cigarettes? Come on, we're not kids! He denied it, because how can he tell you that that was the goal, when he may be ashamed? It's different to use cigarettes as a pretext and get to bed. Separately, how stupid it is to make a girl go at night to buy you cigarettes, because you, the man, can't. How does he not care about your safety? If a man gives me that number, we won't be together long. Even if he wanted sex, be a man and take the girl from them, not for her to come to your feet at night. It doesn't write to you because you have already reflected it, and you have hurt his ego. You've revealed his plan and he knows you're mad. Maybe he thinks that in a few days it will pass and you will get along again. Then he will look for you, he hopes that in time your anger will subside. And for sex you are right that you can pay again. But you're sure he doesn't have to pay for you. He just knows that when he calls you, you will come. That is, he will not dawn to look, you are tied in a towel. It sucks, but a lot of men do. They know you have feelings and benefit. Just don't look for it, and watch seir. He will reappear with some kind excuse, I guarantee you. They always come back to women who know they can mess around. But at least you're up against it, and he'll know you have to work hard to get along. I give you a guarantee. They always come back to women who know they can mess around. But at least you're up against it, and he'll know you have to work hard to get along. I give you a guarantee. They always come back to women who know they can mess around. But at least you're up against it, and he'll know you have to work hard to get along.
Breh, what psychologists we had here! Like No. 12! You must be dying virgin, but terribly proud of the fact that "no one has taken advantage of you"! ...
When you do the same things, you always get the same results. Can't you understand that the reason is in you? In that you put too much emotion, not reason, into your relationships with men, that you are in a hurry to give them your best. Listen to those who wrote above - you really become too easy and comfortable for the man you like, but what is easy is not interesting. That's why your relationships run out quickly and you're left alone. The good thing about mistakes is that they give us life experience and we learn from them, but some of them need more time to learn. I don't want to offend you, but if you showed a little common sense, you wouldn't be hurt, abandoned, and used. You are 22, why do you start a relationship with the wrong people? Why are you 36 years old? divorced with a child? What did you expect from him? besides having fun with you? The boy from the last relationship - I have nothing against the Turks, but how many mixed marriages between them and a Bulgarian (k) can you list for me? I am the only one whose parents gave up on the Turk and I live in such a region. They have a very different mentality, especially the older ones, and the young ones are influenced by them. Their attitude towards women, I will not comment. So don't expect anything from this one either, he showed you how much he cares about you. Do not believe stories about love, common future, etc. blah blah, look at the deeds of man. When they want to sleep with you, everyone is kind, gentle and promising, the truth shines after that. In general, think seriously about your future and so that the same thing does not happen to you, change your attitude towards men, there is no way to change them. Be more sensible and distant, don't take everything for granted, don't let them use you. Let them run after you, if they want to be together, show that you are a girl with character and self-esteem. If you don't respect yourself, others don't respect you. Finally - for prostitutes, you ask why they did not go with them, etc. Well, very simple - why pay for something they receive from you for free? Separately, all the attention and love you give them and brush their ego. No prostitute will give them to them, for her they are nobody, just another client. For your own good - I tell you again, change yourself if you want to change your life. Success! what do they get from you for free? Separately, all the attention and love you give them and brush their ego. No prostitute will give them to them, for her they are nobody, just another client. For your own good - I tell you again, change yourself if you want to change your life. Success! what do they get from you for free? Separately, all the attention and love you give them and brush their ego. No prostitute will give them to them, for her they are nobody, just another client. For your own good - I tell you again, change yourself if you want to change your life. Success!
About 13 out of 12 The girl has posted a topic and wants advice. I and others have answered in our opinion how things are, otherwise she decides what to do. Why should I advise the girl to leave this one, or someone else to use it, as she, like everyone, deserves love and attention? If you teach a person, regardless of gender, that he can play you, he will get on your head. If you teach him that you accept all excuses and excuses, he will continue with them. This applies to love, friends and colleagues. He must learn to assert his rights against men, but not to go to extremes, of course. Just to show that she also has an opinion that she is a person and deserves respect. If this is unthinkable for you, good health!
Hello! I also had a relationship with a Turk who behaved in the same way. In the beginning he was very nice to me, we went out regularly, we wrote to each other constantly, until the moment I decided to sleep with him. Then he started behaving horribly, he didn't call me, he was just rude. I will tell you something that you will hardly like but it is a fact .. The Turks use Bulgarian women only for sex, because a Turkish woman would find it much harder to let them go (according to them). Of course, not everyone is like that, but the table ...