Good evening! One year ago, when my grandmother died, my grandfather experienced it extremely hard, but I still understand it to some extent, they were together for 60 years ... he was 85 and my grandmother was 83, so after her death he started talking incoherently. things - For example, one day I see him open the window and sit in front of him on a chair and I had told him to close it because it was quite cold, and he replied: "I'm waiting for my Nedyalka to come, to see her coming home ! ", since then I was a little startled and told ours, one day my mother sat down to talk to him, to explain to him that Grandma is now in a better place, that we should look forward, and he just staggered back and forth and she was looking at one point ... It started in the evening, when we all went to bed, got up and went out with the words that her grandmother was afraid of the dark and to wait for her somewhere. He goes to her grave almost every day and spends hours there. He doesn't sleep at night, he stands in front of the window and pretends to be waiting for his grandmother to come. Our people are even thinking of taking him to a psychiatrist, but my aunt (his daughter) does not allow it. It is quite difficult to survive the death of Grandma Nedyalka, do you think Grandpa is crazy or just some kind of depression?
Answers 9
I don't think it's for a psychiatrist, it's a defensive reaction. Everyone has different ways to deal with pain. He just wants to think that your grandmother will be back soon. If he realizes she's gone, she'll really go crazy.
I think it's good too. Man loved very much, something that is extremely distant nowadays.
It is not a protective reaction, and his stress has triggered senile diseases - dementia, for example. He may have had microstrokes. Take him at least to LL to measure his blood pressure. It is appropriate to send him to a neurologist. And his daughters-in-law and daughters, if they can't remember, at least hand them over. Dementia and so-called diseases can be very painful for the relatives of the patient. And when he will leave, no one knows.
Do not torture the person with doctors, this is senile dementia, his thoughts are already confused. Rejoice that he has not started to get lost, at this age this is normal, you should watch him as a small 3 year old child.
Maud, why don't you upload? I don't know what the other three wrote before me, but the questioner needs to calm down. There is nothing unnatural or wrong! Treat the old man with respect. Respect his will! Give him peace of mind! Don't torture him with psychiatrists! He doesn't need them! They (at least those in our country) can not help him in any way. Respect him and support him whenever you can. That is all.
Oh man, what do we know about the life of such an old man. How many of them have been with your grandmother? 60-65 for sure. Three times your life so far. Well, she is a part of it, does she live normally afterwards? Number three is right. Such stress leads to disease, let's review. And you left him alone. It's easier for him, in the delusion. He has no one to share his grief with anymore. But you can still make him tell you about her. This will make him feel closer to her and will transmit the memory of her. And when he leaves, there will be no one to ask.
Do not listen to what he says, but see how he says it, with what emotion on his face, the tone of his voice. That way you will know if he is crazy or sensible in his talk. It can be a ritual, small actions that keep the memory and habit of his wife. It is true that through his self-suggestions, he may lose touch with reality, but that is why it is you, especially the grandchildren. You are young, talk, ask about your grandmother, to tell you how they met, for example, it can make him sick, but it is also possible to help him, to cope with the lack. It is better to share than to self-suggest and lose touch with your loved ones. Lonely people drive him to self-suggestions, not by personal choice, but because they have no one to share them with.
Very sad! I don't want to scare you, but the chances of your grandfather getting out of this state are quite small. I don't think it makes sense to take him to a psychiatrist, he's 85 years old, why stuff him with drugs and give him a bunch of therapies? Just accept that part of it is gone with your grandmother and it will never be the same again. This seems to be the case with most older people. And my grandfather became strange after my grandmother died. Well, he didn't say he'd be back any minute, but he kind of shut himself in, and he refused to go to the doctors, and he had diabetes. He claimed that the doctors had killed his grandmother and would not allow him to be killed. It was sad! He lived for several years, but he was no longer the same.
Ordinary senile dementia, my grandmother also died a year ago and my grandfather (81) asks when she would come, he had not seen her soon. There is no point in doctors, this is not treatable and it is normal for his age. F19