Hello, a 22-year-old girl / woman is writing to you. My friend is just as old, we have been together for a little over a year. I don't know where to start, maybe from myself. Before I met him, I was quite frivolous and frivolous. I used to work and now I also work sometimes at discos. I am not at all proud of my past, on the contrary. Sex for one night, I cheated on my friends, even though they deserved it, but I was no different. I heard a rumor of blood fucking indiscriminately. It may sound arrogant, but I'm a pretty beautiful woman, wanted, I was proud of it, I love sex and I got it when I wanted it. I'm definitely somewhat sorry for the things you do. But anyway, it's past and it happened when I met the boy I was with. What can I say about him, he is a man with a huge heart. Terribly tolerant and broad-minded. Simultaneously radiant and sweet, beautiful and sexy. I just see how much he loves and desires me, I adore the spark in his eyes, the way he looks at me. It makes him different from everyone else. His favorite thing is to hug me, no matter how, no matter where, just to hug me, sleep in him and caress me. He is a student, he goes to various courses, works, puts a lot of effort, but he always smiles, treats me well, never raises my voice, reaches out, etc. We only fought about nonsense and I called him a lot and screaming, which I'm not particularly happy about, but he's never been to me before. Sometimes things don't work out for him on all fronts, I see him a little sad or thoughtful, as if worried about his future, but he doesn't let me help him in any way. He says these are his problems, he has to solve them, he has to cope and it's hard to sometimes go head to head with him on this topic.
He has never strangled me, he has not forbidden me to do or not to do anything, he has not restricted me, he has not imposed anything on me and I like this very much, on the contrary, he is very caring and careful with me. Before, everyone tried to restrict or forbid me, and he never did anything to me. The other interesting thing is that his best friend and I don't like each other at all as the reason has nothing to do with him and I'm sure she informed him well what I was, what I was doing, what I was doing and convinced him for a long time that not worth it. However, I learned from a mutual friend that he liked me for a whole year before we first went out together and this is something I never expected before I learned it and honestly when I found out about it I felt great inside.
The problem comes from the fact that lately, we have become a bit alienated, I like to go out more, parties, discos with my friends and I always call him with me, but he almost always refuses me. I have a company, there are men and women who want to call a friend/boyfriend, some of us know each other from childhood and it's fun to get together. He tells me to go and have fun and that there is no problem that I go out without him. Yes, I go out, I have a good time, but sometimes I want him to be there, and he rarely comes and he does it only because of me, not because he likes it very, very much.
I asked him if he was confused that I was going out without him, and he told me that he understood that I loved and cared for my friends and he was not confused that I was going out without him, since I only have fun with friends, and it is important to hold on to your friends and don't dump them even though you already have another person in your life. When he goes out with his friends he calls me and I almost always go with him, but the opposite is not the case. Lately, I realize that I ignore it a bit because of my friends or for some other reason. Several times I thwarted his plans, which he had devised only because I had already agreed with my friends and, accordingly, his little free time. And so a lot of things came together and we moved away a little bit. The other thing is, for 1 month he always wants to talk, he always had something to tell me, but for one reason or another, we always avoided talking. Finally, we talked, it was the other day and after the conversation, I came home upset. He asked me if I saw us together, how I saw us going forward, it was a nasty conversation at all as if he was hinting to me that he was not happy with me and that it was not going well between us. On top of that, his personal problems sometimes derail him, and there seems to be a tension between us lately. But I love him very much, from the first day I've been with him I haven't thought of cheating on him. I don't think I loved anyone like that. I became a completely different woman around him, I try to fit in with his interests, to learn things around him, even to understand him is difficult for me, but I love him. I feel calm around him and despite our differences, I am happy with him. It's hard for me to say what he thinks, but I know he loves me. I just want him to be happy with me and make things a little better, but I don't know how or what to do. So I ask you for advice, you how to fix problems with each other, how to solve them, we need to talk I know, but lately, this is happening hard, we still disagree, but separation is not an option.
Answers 5
Are you afraid to ask yourself and answer a question? Friends or loved ones? Such a person meets once in 100,000. With your appearance and past, he knows he can lose you. If you continue in this way / discos, pubs, etc./ you will definitely lose it. Especially if you go out without him. Think about what you really want. Tossing until the age of 35-40 on the chalgoteks and from churka to churaka until no one looks at you at the end or to indulge in the only loved one who, despite everything, has voted for you and given his love to you. She answered herself and then fought tooth and nail for her decision. It will not fall from the sky. You have to try.
You both have mistakes. So, in a given situation, there is never only one culprit. The mistake with him is that he doesn't tell you openly, about the problems, for example. In my opinion, if you really care about one person and want to be one, sharing and trust is very important. I understand it to some extent, because I am also a person who does not like to burden others or seek help, I do not share, but I do not have a friend for this reason, I mean I do not want to commit myself because I do not feel ready to share with another and trust him. I find it difficult to admit people. But I still realize that it matters. You may neglect it too much, but you have felt it. I understand you and you, because I also have a social circle and I like to have fun. In my opinion, even if you have a friend, you can't sit at home all the time. The bad is, that you are from two different worlds as if you have many differences - you are more extroverted and he is more closed. I don't think that serious commitment means sitting at home all day, not having a social circle. I know many married couples, including my parents, who are not glued to each other. My father goes out with friends from time to time, my mother is not angry. She does not want to go to banquets with him, he goes alone and goes home. She also works in another city and a few days are away from each other, but either she comes home or he goes to her. They told me that it was even better for them not to be glued to each other. Separately my friend's parents - they are both together, but they both love to have fun, to party and that's great. I know another couple like that, married again - the woman has a huge social circle, she is very beautiful, she puts on make-up, dresses well, abe, doll, plays in the theater, separately and does some activity in the municipality. Sometimes I only see her with her friends, I saw her walking outside alone, I only saw her with her husband, her husband and their friendly company. They travel together, separately, anyway. It's just perfect for me. Trust and respect are very important, but this only exists in adults. Only with passion and love nothing happens. In my opinion, if you really want to succeed, you need a serious conversation. If I break up with you now, I don't think he's that keen on getting things done. You still invite him, he doesn't want to come with you. With a serious conversation, I think you could fit in better, but you need to be open. For example, some mode - when to see your friends separately, when to be together, etc. It's very bad not to share. I do not think, that you even have to manipulate yourself for your past. From personal experience I know that a person who is 18-19-20 knows nothing and such manifestations for me are more like a child's squat and after a while it passes. Even then, you hadn't met the man you deserved. In any case, it is definitely better at 19-20-21 to try different people, to have fun, than after 30, when you already have a husband and children, and then to remember that you have to catch up and break up your family. .
I'm 35, I'm not complaining that I don't have friends, I don't miss them! And they are unlikely to support my hobbies - when there are concerts, ceremonies, etc., I go with my camera to shoot them! Since most people prefer to crash into a foxhound, I prefer to respect the work of everyone who organizes this event! Otherwise, the Municipality of Varna takes over the organization of the events in our city and that is why they are free and accessible to everyone! My other hobby is recording interesting shows, concerts and movies on TV! And thanks to the fact that I don't have any company that interferes with my hobbies, I do everything without any restrictions! And not exactly when I leave for the concert, for someone to call me and let's go to a pub and waste my time talking nonsense! I just don't like wasting my time, especially when I know there's something important, and I want to shoot it, everything else is in the background! Otherwise, I know a few neighborhood boys, even from children, but they have been married for a long time and work, which is why they are not looking for me or me!
The important thing is to look in one direction. How do you imagine the future, do you have common plans? He's a student, are you? Do you have a desire for development, do you do something about it? There is also the moment when people start to develop in different directions. I guess, but for example you think mainly about entertainment, and he - about his development in the future. Think and talk. This conversation does not have to end, it can simply initiate a positive change in both.
Tell him that he can trust you completely and ask him more often what to do for him to be happy according to his ideas !!!