Hello and thank you for stopping by my story. I am 22 years old and I have an affair with a man of 30 years. We have been together for a year and a half. Before me, he had no relationship and went out mostly with his friends at discos, etc. After we met, these outings dropped sharply. We worked abroad for 4 months together, but after we got home he couldn't find a job. It still seems to him that the money in Bulgaria is small, and at this stage we have no choice to leave because I study. His company from childhood are mostly his age, but they do not have serious relationships. They go out, drink and so on. He told me that he sometimes wanted to go out because he was told that he was "under a slipper", but his meeting with them included only pubs and drinking, and they sat down and started discussing women. I want a serious relationship with him, but I have the feeling that he behaves childishly and is not ready to take on responsibilities .. and when I say that he can just go out for coffee or a normal place and not pubs, he said they are so simple, and I do not want to replace my friends and that I suffocate him. Every time I tell him to go out well, look at me, I don't bother him or call him, and he always comes back dead drunk in the end. Well ... what a family or a job he has and friends who constantly tell him that I control his life and stop him from going out in the evening. I don't know, I may be wrong, otherwise he helps me with everything and behaves terribly nice, but this is my only problem, please advice. Thanks :) Every time I tell him to go out well, look at me, I don't bother him or call him, and in the end he always comes back dead drunk. Well ... what a family or a job he has and friends who constantly tell him that I control his life and stop him from going out in the evening. I don't know, I may be wrong, otherwise he helps me with everything and behaves terribly nice, but this is my only problem, please advice. Thanks :) Every time I tell him to go out well, look at me, I don't bother him or call him, and he always comes back dead drunk in the end. Well ... what a family or a job he has and friends who constantly tell him that I control his life and stop him from going out in the evening. I don't know, I may be wrong, otherwise he helps me with everything and behaves terribly nice, but this is my only problem, please advice. Thanks :)
Answers 4
You seem serious and responsible to me. Firstly, it is big for you, secondly, it is inappropriate. My opinion if you want a family leave it and look for a serious person. If you are not looking for another family, maybe a few more months, but no more.
Up and down I understand you because I am in a similar situation. The relationship is based not only on trust, understanding, etc., but also on compromises. If he is not ready to reduce these gatherings and does not stop coming back drunk after he sees that you are not okay ... so what are you looking for in this man? You love him, okay, but why bother? Why does he have to torture you? Tell him how you feel.
Drop it, don't waste your life with this garbage
You are obviously more mature in your relationship. Age doesn't matter, this man just isn't right for you. He hasn't grown up yet. Instead of thinking about family, he wonders how to get together with a ram company and shake himself. And he's not serious at all if he doesn't want to work, just to hang out with losers. It will be best for you to leave him and look for a responsible man with whom you have the same goals for the future.