Good morning, good day or good evening. Let's say my name is Dancho (but I don't say that) or person X is 27 years old and I haven't had a girlfriend for 6 years. I don't know how this came about. They say that finding a girlfriend is like finding a job. I am a professional in my job search, I can even give advice. Several things are important in job search. The employer wants to hire a person who will perform well and who is a professional in his field. Like buying the perfect product. From there, my job is to create this product and present it to him in the best possible way. I created the perfect CV with the perfect photo to it. Overall, my resume says one thing: "I'm the person you're looking for." Then I look at all the ads, choose the best ones and the next day I have a schedule with over 20 job interviews. I research information about each company and leave the next day. At the interview, I dress so that my appearance radiates seriousness and responsibility. During the interview, my behavior said, "I'm the perfect person for you, if you hire me you'll make the best decision." So out of 20 jobs they offer me a job in 10, at the end of the day I make a list, I look mathematically at the bigger number. Where there was a better attitude towards me. I compare and choose the best place. So ... I wanted to say that I have commercial skills and I'm not stupid. 3naya that in the search for a girlfriend things are similar, but if I have not had a girlfriend for 6 years, then I have flaws. In general, I know the shortcomings in my appearance and I'm working on it. I look much younger than my age. I'm pretty weak and now I'm in the gym. I started training, and I've never done it before. I plan to persevere in this. My other drawback is that I'm a little anxious, not in my talking to people, when I start talking I get up, but in my gait itself, as if I'm some kind of stiff one. My face is beautiful, but one so tender, a little gay, I don't look smeared. For a year now, I've been talking to everyone I meet on the street. Without expecting anything, just to make contact with the opposite sex, so as not to lose my ability to flirt. In general, there is some tension in me, because of the lack of sex for sure. Should I start going to prostitutes ... I don't know anymore. Obviously, that in order to change I have to realize all my negatives and work on them. I have a plan to enter a fairly fresh environment soon, in general I work on my transformation every day, but I will not need any other advice.
Answers 40
Hello ~~~ I want to tell you something important ... I read your story and I see that there is nothing wrong with you except one .. you do not look at life the way a person who knows his thoughts and feelings would look . So ... what do I mean? You know how to analyze situations, you know how to manage it from the outside, but you don't meet this one from the inside. You don't have a girlfriend because you weren't made for a superficial relationship. It is in your nature to be a seeker with a specific purpose. This means knowing the reasons behind your thoughts, feelings and desires. When you begin to live with a clear consciousness, then you become a unit with a charge, and that charge begins to be attracted and make its way to find what it needs to create a unit with each other. This is nature. Do you understand what I mean? You need clarity, you look at things too childishly and think it's a hop-trope and you're going to mess it up with a muscle or a smile, but it doesn't work. First find out what you want and what qualities you are looking for. Second - keep in touch with women of all ages, with all jobs and interests. Third - notice the one that brings the qualities you are looking for. Fourth, be yourself with her. Be honest and fair. He also makes small gestures of respect and good manners. Fifth, keep her close to you and show her that she can trust you. By the end of step five, it shouldn't be about sex unless it gives you signs. Live in the present and don't worry about anything. The world does not end if they cut. And now I notice another feature of yours - you are afraid of losing. Keep in mind that you are looking for a woman who is the mother of your children. ;) Second - keep in touch with women of all ages, with all jobs and interests. Third - notice the one that brings the qualities you are looking for. Fourth, be yourself with her. Be honest and fair. He also makes small gestures of respect and good manners. Fifth, keep her close to you and show her that she can trust you. By the end of step five, it shouldn't be about sex unless it gives you signs. Live in the present and don't worry about anything. The world does not end if they cut. And now I notice another feature of yours - you are afraid of losing. Keep in mind that you are looking for a woman who is the mother of your children. ;) Second - keep in touch with women of all ages, with all jobs and interests. Third - notice the one that brings the qualities you are looking for. Fourth, be yourself with her. Be honest and fair. He also makes small gestures of respect and good manners. Fifth, keep her close to you and show her that she can trust you. By the end of step five, it shouldn't be about sex unless it gives you signs. Live in the present and don't worry about anything. The world does not end if they cut. And now I notice another feature of yours - you are afraid of losing. Keep in mind that you are looking for a woman who is the mother of your children. ;) Fifth, keep her close to you and show her that she can trust you. By the end of step five, it shouldn't be about sex unless it gives you signs. Live in the present and don't worry about anything. The world does not end if they cut. And now I notice another feature of yours - you are afraid of losing. Keep in mind that you are looking for a woman who is the mother of your children. ;) Fifth, keep her close to you and show her that she can trust you. By the end of step five, it shouldn't be about sex unless it gives you signs. Live in the present and don't worry about anything. The world does not end if they cut. And now I notice another feature of yours - you are afraid of losing. Keep in mind that you are looking for a woman who is the mother of your children. ;)
Dancho, from what you have written it is clear that you are a great perfectionist and pedant. You lack spontaneity. You are calculating. These are all things that may be good for a serious relationship, but at a later stage. In the beginning, all women need laughter, pleasant emotions and spontaneity, ease of communication. Don't tighten up so much and you will get lucky.
'Finding a girlfriend is like finding a job' - with this attitude you will not find a girlfriend.
Tip: Feelings have nothing to do with playing chess or a strategy to get a job, you think a lot and in the wrong way. Yes, you will build a perfect image, you will probably find a woman, and then what ... we will play roles all our lives?
"I am the man you are looking for" - women are looking for men, not footmen. You received 10 out of 20 job offers (which, believe me, is not a great achievement) because you are comfortable. Because you can't chase your goals. The goal of a man is to be ok, to find the most suitable job for him, a woman and whatever else you can think of. Your goal is to please yourself, to be comfortable. For starters, get that out of your head. Fitness, environment, face, but prom, it all doesn't matter until you change your inner world. In other words, stop being an AFC (Average Frustrated Chump).
From the comments, I understand that appearance almost didn't matter. Appearance has a huge, cosmic significance. The people have said it on the clothes they meet in the mind they send. Yes, but if you only have a mind, they will not welcome you at all. No matter what the ladies say, they are attracted to people first by their appearance, and they do not pay attention to others at all. I used to be smart, but I dressed in a clean and ordinary way and nobody paid attention to me. Then I started dressing in fashion, I put on an earring, tattoos, some torn jeans, I bought from those fashion jackets with fluffy hoods. I wanted a modern hairstyle and now the interest in me has jumped to 200%. Then let them tell me that they were chosen by their inner qualities. They choose them by appearance, internal qualities are then needed to maintain the relationship and are still less important compared to appearance.
What can I tell you brother, women value only self-confidence and nothing else. Even if this self-confidence is uncovered. You can be rich, beautiful, tidy, if they see that you don't have self-confidence, their birds dry up and they go to fuck someone with half of your IQ and monthly income. I'm worse than you - I'm chasing 25 and I haven't even kissed. In the last 1 year I lost 20 kilos, I found a good job too, but alas. Everyone yells at me, "Give me a bucket.", "What's so bad about you?" And everyone who yells at me has fucked 5-10 chicks and has no idea what it's like to be crushed. Where can I get this self-confidence like me, no one loved me, no one showed me tenderness, and when I walk on the road, women look straight at me. And when they see an inspired pickle, whose parents will not survive for 15 minutes without them, they start looking at him, to fall in love with him and just wait for him to invite them. And this same bastard thinks that he is very big, that he enchants them and that he did everything himself. Authors like us are "useful" at 35-40, when everyone has done well and is looking for someone desperate to fool him. If you find a solution to your self-esteem problem, share it here. I can't find one at the moment.
Imagine you are in a store. You have two cheeses, one with a torn package, but inside it is uniquely tasty and high quality, and the other has a perfect shiny package, the TV has stuck the brand 100 times in your head. How will you know that the first cheese is stronger than the second, let me tell you - you will take the second and I am 100% sure of that. And then, if it turns out to be tasty, you will always take from it. So it is with people, if they are not shiny, attractive, sexy and passionate you will not give them a chance at all.
"They say finding a girlfriend is like finding a job." Who says that? Slap him ... I've been working since I was 18, I'm already 30, I've never had a problem finding a job. But finding a girlfriend is similar to yours. So the two have nothing in common. About maturity (spelling you a little lame): start doing something sports - whether fitness, martial arts or games of some kind. Something to move the body and increase, at least a little, the volume of the muscles. More muscle leads to more testosterone (testosterone is needed to maintain muscle). If you are fat or thin - get into the norm for height (which is more or less height in centimeters minus 100). If you do not leave - leave. Sunlight is needed for vitamin D, which controls many hormones. And stop talking to everyone - you look like a loser. Build your life, have interests.
I don't think women can give advice on such a case because they themselves don't know what they want. They talk nonsense, but in fact they want passionate sex, muscle and money. Although they do not acknowledge it directly on a subconscious basis, they are looking for just that
Women are guided by their emotions. It's all about provoking emotions in a woman, whether they are good or bad. It is advisable to be positive, but many women are soaked with men who beat them, because it causes strong emotions in them. Your options are either to be super funny and witty or super ass, if you are a "normal" type in the middle, your chances are small. I speak from personal experience and observations.
9 and author, what can I tell you, the decision for you is the ONLY one to replace the plural in your thinking with the only one! Not the women, but the woman! Otherwise your chance is close to zero ... I hope you understand me ... G44
It will not happen if other people have to help better give up.
You don't have to look desperate, author, because despair is repulsive. For starters, try to become self-sufficient. You did it well with sports, but you do it for yourself, so that you have a tone and feel and look good. Find your hobbies, do not stare so much in search of a girlfriend and you will find her. And hobbies can help - sign up for salsa, for example, a lot of women go there, some without a partner. But if you look nervous and searching, it will not shine on you. Give it more casually, more confidently (but not impudently, to be precise). And stop talking to women on the streets, it won't help.
Number 16 is miserable, don't listen to him. Watch RSD on YouTube.
I am the author ... I want to tell others that I focused mostly on meeting new women and not expecting anything from them. The trick is not to find a boyfriend in every girl you communicate with. And just to communicate, to make female friends, so after a while you start to get to know their nature and know what to do. :) But still the appearance is an appearance and it is very, very important ... So far I am very happy with myself, I managed to progress a lot in 1 month. I wish the same to all who have the same goal.
It was an impossible task for me to get out of this shell of despair, but at one point I felt it happening and even exceeded my own expectations. In fact, I was selfless and cheerful only in front of certain people. I did not release my potential. My experience was gained after the age of 25, when my first girlfriend was one I had only dreamed of for years before. I am now 32 and I have realized a lot of things. They advised you correctly on the vision. Hairstyle, clothes, sports and jokes. More or less it happens with almost every woman by the same mechanism. Just never say that you are inexperienced, because Bulgarian women have reservations about such men, even without giving them a chance to prove that they can do it. Two didn't let me because of my confessions, don't do it! Then I became a player and changed tactics. I got drunk one drink at a time, I relaxed and things happened on the first night. After this case, they tied two more, and after them I had a serious relationship for several months, but serious relationships in BG are a big farce, I assure you. It's all bills. Women do not have the sense to know a decent and capable man, they only recognize his financial capabilities. With me in particular, to be honest, those who cut me can only regret it. Because I'm a good lover and the others liked it. For me, women are another puzzle. Don't tell anyone "I love you" it's a huge mistake. Don't be polite and kind! Be a mystery! Don't get bored, don't share your secrets, be committed to your relationship, because they will make fun of your feelings. I have experienced this, others have experienced it. One more thing! Always run with 300 if he asks you what you do when you meet him. These are already the plans for him to use you, to see what money you make and how you get along with your parents. When a woman is attracted to you, she will want you to be with her and get out of prison. Don't get attached to the materialists. Once I felt one and answered every question "secret" and so I intensified her curiosity even more, I fucked her at home and ran away. Her expectations were high. Read and enchant when talking with jokes and quotes from funny books. Be fun and energetic. Makes imitations and sketches. Humor is a shortcut to almost every woman's bed. Pretend to be smart and touch on scientific topics. They will say to themselves "Oh how smart he is" they like you to lead them and be proactive. Don't complain and don't talk about politics. Your indignation at the simplicity around us can only give you a grumbling and boring look. And now the most important thing! Sports !!! Do not go to the gym and take supplements, as the temporary of the walking boobies have passed 10 years ago. Train in the mountains, levers, push-ups, running. Don't take anything. Persistence leads to fast results. Squat every day. I have been squatting for three years and my body has shaped like a swimmer - strong legs, narrow hips and waist, wide chest and shoulders, I have become a gladiator from ancient Rome. Don't lose your hair! Women like a masculine look. Squatting helps to accumulate material in the testicles and so you become attractive. Testosterone attracts women just like a bee hive. I've experienced it all and I know how things work. Women don't like their spouses, many of them have children from men with bellies and traveling from the block to the store downstairs by car. They want real matchmakers. They are sexually dissatisfied. I enjoyed a short-lived relationship much more than anyone else. I met a married woman at the age of 23 with a 4-year-old child. and a man in computer programming. The man earns good money, but is a bit of a nerd type and this predisposes to the emergence of horny growths on his head. From the relationship with his wife, I learned that only the money he brings is important, and there is no time for her and the child. I can write you a big firman, but time is pressing me a lot. Keep these things in mind. In this way, I have made progress in dealing with people in general. I no longer want women for sexual purposes because I'm tired. Many do not even relax during sex and do things mechanically. Only she and the child were fucking hard. It's generally not worth sacrificing for one hole. It's not the pinnacle of sex, it's prestige. Don't think that you will have a lot of fans if you go to bed with 10 for example. Everything depends on the vision and the ability to keep it longer.
<22> - I died laughing as I read the instructions. Honestly, if I have to pretend to be a monkey for a duck, I'd better be alone. Author: This: "They say that finding a girlfriend is like finding a job." not true. The one who told you you won't ask him about ANYTHING anymore. Finding a girlfriend is like finding a friend (not a beer buddy), but a friend. A person to whom you call at 2 o'clock at night and tell him that you need help to get up and come to help you. And this is not done with "what others like", but with revelation. Be direct. If you like someone, tell her. If she likes you too, she will give a damn. If you don't like it, it will crack. A woman knows in 10 minutes whether she will sleep with you or not so you lose nothing, but we do it in private. In front of friends, friends;) - no. If you pretend to be rich, many women will decide to use you for a wallet and will do it even without liking you. Then you know what's going on;) Oh, yes - beware of those lonely with children. They will turn your head with sex and pots and then all your life you will have to do other people's children, made by former "thrills". In other words - smart .... then the blonde;)
Ah, here's number 23 - the hater of single women with children. He did not fail to register. Won't you post a new topic? When looking for a boyfriend, not to look for a woman with a child alone? How elementary you are. Nobody forces you to do anything, does it? !!
22. You are very right. But from sex to friendship the difference is huge. Yes, I know if I should go to bed with someone after ten minutes of talking and I did, but I got up at two in the middle of the night because of men I didn't have an intimate relationship with or had already ended. It is good for the author to understand for himself what he is looking for.
Until 23-22 he expressed himself a little strangely, but the idea is not to be a monkey, but to be funny and look good human, but not "tree".
From 22 to 23, the boy is not obliged to listen to the "instructions". I share personal experience. I just recognize the different types of women and treat each one differently. Behavior is important if you want not only to have a relationship, but to keep you in bed. It is stupid to pretend to be others, but we live in a matrix. I have seen and I know. Aetore, be careful with these friendly relations with different women, because instead of a female companion in life you will have many girlfriends with whom you will talk all sorts of nonsense while walking in the parks and the center. First you look for intimacy, then you think about getting to know each other. Things have to happen fast. It's kind of Lechman to walk with a chick, and not be intimate but just listen to her sweet stories ... it's not masculine. Women feel who won't follow their bagpipes, that's why they have to take on roles. I've been in this movie. But the most important thing is a strong energetic body and oratory, it makes them become emotional and you can benefit from their weakness. At least that's what the characters I've been betting on. To be sweet-spoken and sexy physically. Otherwise, if you decide to bet on money and a profession and catch one, it will put its horns on you. Good luck knowing that you are a blacksmith of happiness
Both 22 and 23 are very wrong.
27, lol, you give great advice. I would not sleep with a man who is on the principle "first pass her, then I will get to know her." Why are you afraid that if you don't sleep with a woman right away, she won't let you go at all? Apparently you think that apart from a nice body and sweet talk you have nothing else to offer. It is true that a woman in 10 minutes of dating knows if she would sleep with someone. But this is at the primary level, and that's why so many women suffer after men dump them. They just don't give themselves time to judge him, jump in his bed and then bang their heads. I was like that too, I'm in love and when I liked someone, I went to bed with them. What a big mistake. It wasn't until a year ago that I realized it wasn't done that way. A man has to prove himself to me before we have sex. If I like him very much, I let him understand, I flirt, but if he asks for something more, I pull away. When he bonds emotionally enough with me, then I let him go. I have suffered enough from my own spontaneity, sincerity and pure feelings. I'm not like that anymore. In life, you either turn people around, or they turn you around.
Wow, it was very difficult. And our grandfathers once just waited for the girl to come to the water tap, they drank the mints and that's it. ;) And then - oh life hello hello!
Until 29 - no, there will always be something she will not like and it will be a reason not to let you go. You don't realize that there are men who are healthy and do it at the age of 35, who haven't had sex because they are being cut for nonsense. Because they are not with all the qualities in one - beautiful, intelligent, wealthy, funny, etc. One is missing and will tell you "well, we are not for each other" Do you know how many times I watched this movie with me and other boys? And if I can radiate attractiveness with sweet talk and aura, why not take advantage of it. And I may be wrong according to 28, but let me tell you, I still want to be wrong. Wrong but I succeed. And without these understandings with the same women I would not have succeeded ..
29, so until yesterday you played like that, and now suddenly the men have to prove themselves. Why should anyone pay dearly for something that was cheap until yesterday, when they can find it elsewhere at the real price?
Until 29, haha, you call it different is to understand that you don't like one thing and you can cut it or hang it for a long time with hopes. I never reveal myself to women, because when I reveal myself and find out that I am average and I like to read books and learn languages and ride a bike or walk, they laugh, but if you are a qualified person with a good salary, they don't laugh. So how could you be in a hurry to fuck them? Otherwise you have to sit a virgin or be scared. Not to mention that if you go and tell them about your troubles, they don't support you, but they call you boring, grumbling and they dump you ... but they don't get into your situation at all. You walk along the alley - they don't notice you, you walk well dressed with a nice dog breed - and they already consider you cool. You know how many dogs it took to get up ..
32, I didn't play "like that". Once I fell in love with a man, I was ready to sleep with him - out of love, out of naivety - without him showing that he was responding to my feelings. I was stupid and strongly attached, but sex for me then was not a bargaining chip, but a shared experience. I've never used sex to get anything. You define me as a commodity that someone has to pay for. I'm not a commodity. I just don't let anyone play me anymore and make fun of my feelings. I do not force anyone to prove myself to me. Whoever wants and thinks it's worth it, does it. For the record, the men I slept with are counted on one hand.
I do not agree with 22 that if someone asks you what you do, then she is directly mercantile. She can ask you to check if you are at her level. For example, I am a doctor, but you will never recognize my appearance - everyone thinks of me as a student, a secretary, etc. And what, I meet someone and I ask him- "What are you doing?", And he tells me, for example, "I work at McDonald's ..." Amy, I'm not going to get caught up with such a nerd very clearly. If you don't have a serious profession, you have no chance with a woman who is firmly on her feet. Don't pretend to be smarter than yourself - everything shines right away and you just become a laughing stock. And get hairless, for sure!
One thing I'll tell you, don't go after prostitutes. After a long relationship (6 years) I struggled, and I continue to fight depression with paid sex. How much money I broke in 18 months, I'm sick ..
Ahahhh brother, you have already found a girlfriend - do you see her in the mirror? In your "story" you talk only about yourself, "how beautiful I am, how smart I am and no one ties me" ... In your sphere you are the perfect product, why is she a girl at all? You can have the perfect sex with yourself, you know how perfect! I have the feeling that you are one of the bison in my class who was so crazy that he went to the girls to explain that if they went out with him he would let them copy .. the joke of the class ... with that thinking you will not find a girlfriend, and a friend! Are there really more such people ...: ??
Number 34, do twenty-eight fingers have one hand?
I agree with number 31. There are many, many women who say they want a funny, gentle, understanding, gentleman, patient man. However, even if it is only 1% more fun than their idealized ideas, they think of him as a clown. Even if he is only 1% gentler, they think he is less of a man. Even if he is only 1% more understanding of them, they think of him as a friend. Even if he's only 1% more gentlemanly, they think he's a fool. Even if he is only 1% more patient, he is thought to be desperately waiting indefinitely for fear of being abandoned. Deny as much as you want, but the facts are just that.
Number 35, what do you mind working at McDonald's? What about the fact that you are a doctor? Didn't you grab the raincoat? I had a classmate who worked at McDonald's as a regular salesman, and for several years has been a manager for the same company with an income of 15 vouchers a month. And what do you think is wrong with him working in this company? To have your prejudices ...
H 38, yes, and men like it a lot, because I can hit their chicks with 10 fingers, with the other 10 - to stimulate their anus, and with the other eight to touch myself. Now you understand why they pay dearly for something that was cheap until yesterday, don't you?
Do you have a car? I guess you don't - buy. A 20-year-old BMW will do the work for you on your problem, although you will sink with money, but the goal justifies the means. This is not good for talking on the street. You will be known to be bitten by a dog. You talk 3, they tell 10 girlfriends each and finally 30 women in the area know you. 6 years ago when she had a girlfriend, did she fuck her a lot or did she not know she was your girlfriend? Tell details. Number 40 - your friend lied to you about the money. The director of McDonald's in Bulgaria may take 15,000, but as a "district manager" you have not agreed on one zero.
Up to 35, Ah, yes, hair removal .. I forgot. The second type of women, after the one who falls for men and bad boys, who is gaining more and more popularity with his attraction to gentle natures with shaved legs and arms. Interestingly, even if you are a doctor, you can still be attached to my sleep and my sweet talk, without knowing who I am and what I do, thanks to my intelligent and serious appearance.
Enroll in a course for folk dances, you will meet new people, you will learn new movements, you will feel comfortable in your body, this is a forgotten therapy of the Bulgarian people.
Number 40, the fact that he earns 15 vouchers a month, what makes me happy? They and the drug bosses make millions, and I still wouldn't do that. And why do you think it's all about the money? Nowadays, women make enough money. Don't you think there are other more meaningful things in life that impress women?