His Family

I never thought I would write my story here too! My story is very long. I am 18 years old and I have a friend for a year and a half. He is 21. He and his family are of Roma origin, but this has never been a problem for me. You know how perfect every relationship is in the beginning - so was ours. We went out, shared and talked about all sorts of topics. I'm not sure when the problems started. At the beginning of our relationship, I met his parents and he met mine. He and I were fascinated by our families, and everything seemed to be going well. The only difference that was with him is that he lives only with his grandparents - his mother has been abroad for 10 years and has not seen his father. They liked me, or so it seemed at first. Over time, our relationship became very emotional and we were inseparable. I stayed to sleep in them, but he did not stay at home. One day, as I was standing with his grandmother and we were talking, she asked me how long we had been with her grandson. Then I think only 3 months had passed. After I told her how much, she said, "Well, come on, my girl, it's time for you." I asked her what time it was for us and she said that we should get married now, because after having sex, I can get pregnant by someone else and say it's his. Hey, that buried me. I kept my composure and told her it was too early. She said nothing more.

My friend came and we went out somewhere, and I told him everything. He said he would talk to her and he really did, and she apologized to me. I told myself that everything on this topic was over. Time passed and I told him that I was tired of only me going to sleep in them, and he was not at home. And he started coming home too. It was like that for a month. One day after such an evening when he was at home, we went to them and his grandfather started shouting at us how this could not happen, because it was not in their tradition, how the man could not go to the woman and some of them. He was shouting and using ugly epithets, and my friend was silent. Then I left and said I would not return to this house. That's what I did. I went home, I wanted to dump my friend, but he promised me that everything would change and I trusted him. I didn't go to his house. I didn't hear from them like I used to. But one day his grandfather called me and asked me to call an ambulance because my friend's grandmother was very ill. I immediately helped, and later I went to the hospital and we got along. I was at her hospital every day and kept her company, and later I went to my friend to help there with women's work. His grandmother was discharged and everything seemed to be fine. Time passed and we were fine. One day, however, my friend also told me that it was time for us to get married. I told him that in the coming years he would not see me dusting and cooking for him. But I also decided to ask him if we ever decide to take this more serious step of where we will live. And he told me that we would live with his family. Then I realized that it was glued to them and that it just couldn't happen. He told me he couldn't even think of leaving them alone after they were that age and had been raised. And they, they are so cunning that they just blame him and take his money every month. He didn't even dare raise their voice. The marriage was over. One day I was waiting for him to come home, and he told me that his grandparents wanted to go to some village to visit and he had to take them. I was a little angry, but I didn't say anything. Three days later, a mutual friend of ours told me that he had gone to the village to ask for a girl to marry him. That was the end. At least that's what I thought. I dumped him and didn't look for him for a month until I heard he was in the ambulance because he was snorting and I felt sorry for him. I felt sorry for him and called him, and later we got together.

There seemed to be a change. He raised the tone of theirs, he came home and I didn't, but I can still feel the barrier they create. They keep telling him bad things about me and still explaining to him how I should follow him, not him after me. How should we get married, etc., because such were the traditions. I still walk in them, but I see the contempt and hypocrisy behind their smiles. I also feel light attacks. Why am I with him? I do not know either. I just always believed that there was something good in everyone. I believed that he too would change. I'm not even looking for advice. I just pour out my soul because I feel like I'm suffocating.