Since it has never happened to me before, I want to ask you something. I will please mostly women. How do you show a man that he hurt you because you loved him and he didn't respond to your feelings. Do you try not to show yourself? What methods do you use to present the situation in such a way that you don't really care about this person at all? If you then meet him somewhere, how do you behave? I ask these questions because I think I disappointed a girl in this way and realized that it crushed her. It wasn't intentional, but I just didn't want a relationship with her. It would not be bad to throw in some other element of your experience about how you show interest in a man and stimulate him to act. It will be very useful for me if you take a few minutes. Thanks in advance.
Answers 41
I was crazy about a man, he was crazy about me too. We had that weird feeling like you've known this man for 20 years. Our love was real and very painful. We were 15 years apart and he decided that when I was younger than him I deserved happiness but without him. Decide for me to continue alone. One day he just left without explanation. It hurt me terribly - for deciding what was best for me without asking me, because it destroyed a true love. We did not keep in touch for many years. Then we met again - he kissed me so passionately, as if he saw me for the first time / and ex-boyfriends do not kiss like that /. We talked about the old days, who did what all these years. What did I do? I knocked him out and left - no explanations, no phone calls, no contacts and no more meetings. He wanted to see me again — only I didn't want to.
"I fucked him and left - no explanations, no phone calls, no contacts and no more meetings." - ha, ha, you tilted him to k. ра. Here, we are looking for this fucking and the fools give it voluntarily, and then they want respect !? This makes you dumb muffins and that's why the boys dump you, and then roar on forums, abandoned and forgotten.
№1, the only thing I can tell you for sure is that you did NOT learn the lesson! And since you have not learned it, you will experience the same thing once more, and once more, until you learn it. Whether it will be in this life or in one of the next - these are details. The bad thing is that you won't remember this post for long and you will wonder where the heat came from ...
I also feel very sad about avoiding one person and the only thing I do is avoid him and avoid any meeting with him. I don't want to see him, because if I used to long and happily expected and wanted to see him at least from afar, now when I see him I want to cry. And I don't want him to be happy that he hurt me and even more to make fun of my feelings. Being in love is awful, why this should happen to people I don't know. Why some men are so fake and only nurture false hopes, but I'm also guilty of being a deluded goose not recognizing a fake, I was very well misled
As a child, it was very obvious to me if a boy hurt me - I cried for him, I explained myself, I wanted him back. A year later, I regret this behavior, because it seems like a lack of dignity, and after a while everything passes and you see that this guy was not worth it at all, but ... love. :) At the moment I would not allow such behavior in any way. Yes, I will suffer, it will hurt me, but I will not show it to him. My very attitude towards the relationship has changed - I don't have high expectations, I let everything happen and I don't put all my work to heart. I just have one thing in mind. When I see an ex, I behave quite normally and friendly. He has nothing to think so much about.
Number 3 - I learned my lesson very well. And for the lives I have only this one.
Author, since you didn't want a relationship with her, why are you now tormented that you hurt her? It is simply a thing of the past. Keep going. Or did you later realize that you have feelings and are not indifferent and now you want to be with her and she does not feel the same? M30
Number 1 is absolutely right. I have experienced a similar moment in my life. We women are patient and use the strength of our character just when we need it, for the right person, in the right place !!! I do not accept the author's question as a question, because situations hurt women of all kinds, and the details are too important.
It has happened to me several times to like a man and he does not feel the same way about me. Very disappointing, especially if the likes are great and we hope that maybe something good can come out of it. In short, you're starting to make a movie. However, when it doesn't work out and the person pushes you away, for whatever reason, the feeling is very nasty. When you are younger, you seem to experience things very badly, you start shaking, asking questions, and when you are already middle-aged, as I am in this case, you try to be more realistic. You say to yourself, well, it's not possible, what can I do now, I won't die, how many men are there on this earth? However, in order to answer your question specifically, how does a woman behave in such cases, I, for example, cool down. I get very reserved, apathetic and my whole behavior screams, that I am not happy with what has happened and that I no longer want to deal with it. It's very obvious to me, I've tried to hide it, but I know that everything in me betrays me. You can't be an ultra-smiling and friendly person and suddenly become as cold as an iceberg. That's how I behave. At a distance, I avoid any contact with the person until I pass. Then I don't care anymore. There is one exception in my life that makes me think that this rule is not written after all. Some time ago, in 2011, I met a new company, and I fell in love with a man in it. How could I not try to get his attention, I always somehow mentioned things that he liked, I always dressed in a way that he likes to see women dressed, I hung I remember quite often in front of the mirror every time I knew that we will be detected. Nothing happened to me. But we became hellishly good friends. After months of trying to tell him I liked him, he didn't respond in any way, and it became clear to me that I wasn't his type. It was good that summer had come and I went to the sea and there I shook off the thoughts about him and when we met again in the autumn, things were different. I even started teasing him that he was a horse with caps and that he hadn't even made the effort to poke around and understand what kind of person I was. And he answered me with humor and now I have one of the closest men in my life, who from a platonic model has become a major element of male presence in my life. And that's enough for me, beauty is not possible by force and one should accept these things not as a fall, but as an opportunity to meet another more suitable ... Woman of 30 But we became hellishly good friends. After months of trying to tell him I liked him, he didn't respond in any way, and it became clear to me that I wasn't his type. It was good that summer had come and I went to the sea and there I shook off the thoughts about him and when we met again in the autumn, things were different. I even started teasing him that he was a horse with caps and that he hadn't even made the effort to poke around and understand what kind of person I was. And he answered me with humor and now I have one of the closest men in my life, who from a platonic model has become a major element of male presence in my life. And that's enough for me, beauty is not possible by force and one should accept these things not as a fall, but as an opportunity to meet another more suitable ... Woman of 30 But we became hellishly good friends. After months of trying to tell him I liked him, he didn't respond in any way, and it became clear to me that I wasn't his type. It was good that summer had come and I went to the sea and there I shook off the thoughts of him and when the autumn we met again, things were different. I even started teasing him that he was a horse with caps and that he hadn't even made the effort to poke around and understand what kind of person I was. And he answered me with humor and now I have one of the closest men in my life, who from a platonic model has become a major element of male presence in my life. And that's enough for me, beauty is not possible by force and one should accept these things not as a fall, but as an opportunity to meet another more suitable ... Woman of 30 After months of trying to tell him I liked him, he didn't respond in any way, and it became clear to me that I wasn't his type. It was good that summer had come and I went to the sea and there I shook off the thoughts about him and when we met again in the autumn, things were different. I even started teasing him that he was a horse with caps and that he hadn't even made the effort to poke around and understand what kind of person I was. And he answered me with humor and now I have one of the closest men in my life, who from a platonic model has become a major element of male presence in my life. And that's enough for me, beauty is not possible by force and one should accept these things not as a fall, but as an opportunity to meet another more suitable ... Woman of 30 After months of trying to tell him I liked him, he didn't respond in any way, and it became clear to me that I wasn't his type. It was good that summer had come and I went to the sea and there I shook off the thoughts about him and when we met again in the autumn, things were different. I even started teasing him that he was a horse with caps and that he hadn't even made the effort to poke around and understand what kind of person I was. And he answered me with humor and now I have one of the closest men in my life, who from a platonic model has become a major element of male presence in my life. And that's enough for me, beauty is not possible by force and one should accept these things not as a fall, but as an opportunity to meet another more suitable ... Woman of 30 that summer had come and I went to the sea and there I shook off the thoughts of him and when the autumn we met again things were different. I even started teasing him that he was a horse with caps and that he hadn't even made the effort to poke around and understand what kind of person I was. And he answered me with humor and now I have one of the closest men in my life, who from a platonic model has become a major element of male presence in my life. And that's enough for me, beauty is not possible by force and one should accept these things not as a fall, but as an opportunity to meet another more suitable ... Woman of 30 that summer had come and I went to the sea and there I shook off the thoughts of him and when the autumn we met again things were different. I even started teasing him that he was a horse with caps and that he hadn't even made the effort to poke around and understand what kind of person I was. And he answered me with humor and now I have one of the closest men in my life, who from a platonic model has become a major element of male presence in my life. And that's enough for me, beauty is not possible by force and one should accept these things not as a fall, but as an opportunity to meet another more suitable ... Woman of 30 And he answered me with humor and now I have one of the closest men in my life, who from a platonic model has become a major element of male presence in my life. And that's enough for me, beauty does not happen by force and one should accept these things not as a fall, but as an opportunity to meet another more suitable ... Woman of 30 And he answered me with humor and now I have one of the closest men in my life, who from a platonic model has become a major element of male presence in my life. And that's enough for me, beauty is not possible by force and one should accept these things not as a fall, but as an opportunity to meet another more suitable ... Woman of 30
Something similar happened to me recently, only we had a relationship with the man and he dumped me! What did I do ... well, first I tried to pretend I didn't care, I wanted him to think that I had overcome him, I hoped he would look for me and get together, but he didn't. Then I thought that another man liked me, maybe I was trying to make him jealous, I hoped he would be jealous, but he didn't react at all, it even seemed to get worse. I realized that he would not look for me anymore because I learned some things that made our relationship difficult and even impossible in the future, I realized that I had lost him and it became very hard for me, I cried every day even sometimes thinking about his voice, in general his presence that is absent from my life ... I'm crying again. I wanted him to know how I felt and I was wrong, I said and did various things that I now regret, but I would not dare to tell him now because he will think me crazy that I am bothering him again. I didn't use any methods or anything like that, just everything I felt inside and anger and pain I tried to show them in words because I thought that even though he didn't want us to be together he was still feeling something for me, I hoped until the end that maybe things will turn around. Now I don't bother him in any way, but I still love him, I even think that if another one appears I will remember him again and I will torment myself internally, I don't know how long this torture will last! If I meet him I don't know what to tell him, but I will certainly greet him, I won't pretend I don't know him, this is life, sometimes we just have to live with such pain!
When someone has hurt you and you have felt betrayed, hurt and lied to all at once ... He becomes indifferent to you. Between love and hate the thread is very thin. And it is not even hatred, you do not feel hatred - you do not feel anything, just indifference. After a while, when you see a person from whom you felt hurt, he is indifferent to you.
Author, tell us more about how you disappointed her and how do you know that this crushed her?
Number 2-dumb muffin you will tell your mother. Apparently you haven't read anything I've written. I haven't wiped it in a bar overnight !!!! We had a CONNECTION !!!! As I wrote, I went forward and he was still wandering. But I don't care anymore - is it good, is it bad, where and with whom is it !!! The past is past Number 1
14, it showed what you are. With this malice you will stay that way ... She was ahead. Haha! Does he dream of this on Christmas Eve? !!
The good thing about me is that when someone loses interest in me, I lose because it makes me feel good, it has a mutual interest and mutual nourishment of feelings. If I like someone, but I feel that there is no interest, I do not care at all, I am not one of the women who try to force someone to impress. For example, even if I start a relationship with someone and we see that it doesn't work out, I wouldn't be angry with the person if he wants us to break up. Like me, I have the right to leave if I don't like something. But there is one condition - pure relationships - that is, the man comes and tells you - it will not work, and that's it. The men I can't stand are the ones who give you empty hopes, they tell you how you will be together, at one point the woman sinks and he disappears. This behavior hurts me a lot. I know there are a lot of complexes, who just want to turn the woman's head and then move on to the next one, but that's very ugly. One case I remember, I only took revenge for such behavior once, in other cases I just cut off contact and I don't want to see this person. So this case - a man gave me empty hopes, hung me, lied to me and hurt me a lot. He was just inflating his ego. So things went well that I put all my charm into action and at one point he fell in love, and I had already lost interest. After he was in love, I just dumped him most unceremoniously and without explanation. I'm glad I did it, because I know he's done a lot of women before me. I hope he's rethought his behavior, but I don't care. He was looking for me years later, I didn't pick up his phone and that's it. Such men deserve it. I generally don't like revenge, but in this case I rejoice, because someone has to show them where such people belong and to understand that they have a human being with feelings against them, and not a soulless physical body. Unfortunately, they begin to understand it after they hurt them in the same way.
I would just like him to understand that love is something that is more than sex and does not prevent me from being with me. But if he insults me, and accuses me unreasonably, and if his new one laughs at me, then I will write letters to him telling him that he is wrong and that he is wrong with their ugly attitude. Still, I won't want anything from him, just to be ethical to people.
Hey ... How is it going to love someone who hasn't responded to your feelings? I can be deceived and fall in love with some false geek and follow complete ignorance and diligence to forget! Personally, I am one of the most difficult lovers. I am now about 30 years old. and I have 3 unique and completely different cases of falling in love, 2 of which have grown into love. Case 1 - At puberty, a boy and I loved each other very much, but we were too small for commitment and other reasons that I will not bother you. Now he is happily married and I am very happy for him, I wish him all the happiness and I feel only pure love for him without platonic elements. Hello, hello, and that's enough for me. Case 2 - Nasty period! I fell in love with a geek who explained to me for several years in love, how I was special and unique to him, how he wanted marriage and children only from me and the like. I didn't bond with him, but I fell in love. Then he started annoying me on purpose, he didn't call me for months. Then he told me that he did it to annoy me because he had feelings for me, but he always wanted to be with me. I'm tired of his toys. He showed indifference for a long time and then it was as if I was the only one. He just drove me crazy! I still can't shake it off - it's as if I've been left with a mental scar for the rest of my life. Case 3 - This is the only person I've roared about like crazy. I both fell in love and loved him forever. And there is no release;). I'm with him now, even though number 2 can't get out of my head. Love is a crazy thing! I'm tired of his toys. He showed indifference for a long time and then it was as if I was the only one. He just drove me crazy! I still can't shake it off - it's as if I've been left with a mental scar for the rest of my life. Case 3 - This is the only person I've roared about like crazy. I both fell in love and loved him forever. And there is no release;). I'm with him now, even though number 2 can't get out of my head. Love is a crazy thing! I'm tired of his toys. He showed indifference for a long time and then it was as if I was the only one. He just drove me crazy! I still can't shake it off - it's as if I've been left with a mental scar for the rest of my life. Case 3 - This is the only person I've roared about like crazy. I both fell in love and loved him forever. And there is no release;). I'm with him now, even though number 2 can't get out of my head. Love is a crazy thing!
I am never interested in such men again, I don't even say hello to them, I don't care what they do, or who they want to show themselves to me, or that they come to say hello to me, or whatever About me books have been read and I am done with them forever, no matter that they still keep my phone, for example, and from time to time try to see if the number will be G32
as long as you hurt her, you want advice on how women behaved - each one experiences the pain individually. What can I tell you that it is very nice? How we tell men that we love them - so different. There are some girls who do not even suggest and still really love. In general, I personally think that the man should be the leader, he should suggest to the woman. Personally, when I like someone and run away from him .., which is not good for me, but this is for me personally .. If I like him, I run away to my meetings, it makes sense to make our meetings shorter, otherwise it can to write him letters in 100 lines .. It's a bit childish, but I can't overcome it ..
I replace casual friendship with politeness. The kind of protocol courtesy we demonstrate when communicating with little-known people. This is my way of maintaining my dignity when I am hurt.
Number 1, the dog with the salami scared her :) It could have been even more heartbreaking. For example, to leave him contemptuously a ball of banknotes to eat with friends in the neighborhood pub after the humiliation. And if she had invited a friend to join in the fun, little by little, half a year of going to psychoanalysts would have cost the man his recovery.
Different girls experience it differently. Some shut themselves in and don't talk to anyone, others chirp and complain to friends, others seek revenge on how to get him back to make him feel bad, others pretend that everything is fine, fifth - it's just them indifferent, sixth - they catch someone else in spite of the one who hurt them.
If you gave her vain hopes for a long time, if you lied that you loved her, if she believed you, it crushed her ... definitely. And if you see yourself, he will definitely not look at you with confidence. Although true love forgives everything, hopes for everything, it is merciful and good. My friend dumped me for 3 months with another, and I was studying for a state exam and I was the busiest then, I was very sad .. that his betrayal was just then .. BUT after he dumped the new one and he came back with me, talking about how he could do this to me, how he got caught on the other side of the lies and how I, while I was struggling, believed in someone who was not even at my level .. Well, I forgave him, but it's hard it was 1 month for me to give him the necessary trust from before .. but it is not impossible .. The important thing for me was that he had realized the mistake, even though I had suffered ..
If I feel that my feelings are not shared and I am not wanted, I immediately distance myself from the person. The last thing I would do in such a situation is to seek contact or to impose my feelings - for me it is a matter of dignity. Where I am not wanted, I have no job. And yes - I immediately become cooler and withdrawn. I guess inside I am somehow disappointed and cold towards the person, especially if I had any expectations. But definitely my romantic attitude evaporates the moment he indicates that, for example, he does not perceive me as a woman or as something other than a friend, and for a while I purposefully dilute the contacts until he passes me by.
I go through different phases. The latter case is relatively recent. We quarreled, he told me there was no point in continuing. I left him alone for a week or two, after which I allowed myself to write to him and apologize for some of my actions, to explain to him that he really meant a lot to me, and if he thought it was worth it, he had time to look for me. And for me, this is not a trampling but a dignity, you are just revealing the cards to a person you think you love. However, preserving dignity is exactly what you can withdraw from when you see that the person is not sure of their feelings. So I explained myself to my man and left him alone. It's still going on, but I don't plan to do anything more. Whatever I had to say to him, I said it and I was here. If he decides, he will look for me, if not, good health. It means a lot to me, but that doesn't mean I would wait for him forever, and that if someone else showed up, I wouldn't try to make a connection with him. And usually this happens to me - another just appeared and the old man remembers that he realized some things. But still, every chance has an expiration date!
Abe, why do you all think that a woman can't fuck an ex-boyfriend like number 1 just so easy, for sex, especially if he was good at it? Maybe you think this is a male patent? Yes, but no, we women can do it without a problem, so don't get upset as moralists and don't attack the girl. I notice that especially men find it difficult to swallow behavior like theirs. And on the topic - I keep cool and distant and I try not to be noticed much.
I will only tell the author that he is one of the few successful men in this world to feel or understand that they have hurt a girl who sighed at them. We are usually very secretive and try not to betray ourselves, because firstly it is terribly humiliating and secondly, we give great pleasure to the one who has spoiled our feelings. Something like this has happened to me only once in my life, but my scar has remained forever. I didn't betray myself and he didn't even suspect it. I spotted him with his boyfriend a few times and I wanted to scream, but I smiled and greeted them most kindly, even though it took me a few days to recover. The truth is that it is terribly painful and I advise you not to deal with it anymore, because if you did not want a relationship with her, it means that you took her for granted. I think you've screwed her up enough. To be calm in front of you, don't show her anything, that you guess or know, because it will deepen her wound even more. I hope I was useful.
Depends, what was between you !? !! If there was any intimacy and you used it in some way, don't pretend that nothing happened, show her that you're sorry, apologize to her, because if you meet a lot of naughty people, it will happen if you pretend you don't care, if she still think of you and love you soon will feel bad !!!
The author dropped the bomb and covered himself. Tell us a little more about your story. So many comments, and nothing from you ... Aren't you afraid that when you tell details you will hear a lot of negative comments? You look like the author of another topic, where he liked the girl but just wanted to sleep with him, and now he has a guilty conscience if she wasn't the right person for him, only too late.
I left. I'm sorry I didn't do it earlier. It just wasn't worth it.
When someone hurts me internally, I suffer a lot, but outwardly I can't see. In the evening I go to bed crying alone, and during the day I keep laughing among the people as if nothing had happened to me, but in fact this person is constantly in my thoughts and at any moment I hope that he will look for me again. But as hard as it is, I try to forget it, and over time, albeit slowly, it happens. One day I open my eyes and realize that this man is somewhere far in the past. And these people come back sooner or later, but there is no second chance for them and there never should be, because no matter what they do for me, they can no longer be the same as before ...
You left, or maybe you should have done it earlier. Did you go too far with her to leave her and run away because she fell in love with you, and if you had to do that at all, maybe you would have saved a lot of her tears if you had acted humanely! Do you feel anything for her, what will you feel if you see her ... think ... and then talk if it was worth it !?
yes, he cares a lot that someone suffers, he pretends to be great..with someone else who knows what..Insensitive people, hey ..
I avoid any contact with him. Only when I see him and I feel sick, definitely not contacting someone makes it easier to forget, the rest is deliberate torture ..
If you have feelings for her, try to show it, it is possible that she still has, but hides it. If not, just stay friends or nothing. Observing myself, my friends, etc., I noticed various things. When a girl is hurt, she can behave viciously and angrily towards the person, ignore her, pretend to be disinterested, behave indifferently and coldly, behave normally, laugh, flirt with others, show pain you are. And he can do these actions, but they mean nothing. That is, if she flirts with someone else or laughs, maybe she really likes him or is happy.
Number 19, number 19 ... Just look at how many lines you have dedicated to the "geek" and how many to your current "love". It is most unpleasant when we have to lie to ourselves. And it always weighs like that ... And rather, it can't come out of your head, but out of your heart, and that bothers you so much. It is very obvious.
And why do you ask? Are you sorry and now you have decided to try to be with her or just to raise your ego? I hope it's not the second. If you hurt her once, you are very unlikely to be with her again, if she has dignity of course :)
Love is stronger than anything. At least that's what those who believe in it think.
There are many ways, in fact, the best way is to show someone that you don't care. If you're annoyed that she did something ... or that she's been with someone, it actually means you have feelings. Therefore, what you do will just let your feelings die ... but don't let them go! Maybe you are not guided by your heart but by your mind, which is not bad, but when it comes to love you have nothing to think about!
I'm about to tell a boy I like him! I'm actually in love with him, but I can't tell him that! He's a complete idiot, but he doesn't ask! In fact, we can say that we do not know each other! And now I know he will cut me off, but I can't stand having to share it with him! I want him to know that a fool has fallen in love with him and is somewhere alone with her feelings! And how will I behave after he cuts me off I will retire! I will do my best not to run into each other at school!
Well, how do they react, most are vindictive. They are looking for some trick to bring him back. They are rarely broadly cut. But this is their biology. They have to take care of the offspring, whether they exist or not - female characteristics. I hope your case is not such a woman, but cool. There are some. M40