How Do You Learn To Receive From Men?

   I pay for everything myself, I work, I keep myself in perfect shape and when men see that they can't be useful to me, they become more complex and start spitting on feminism ... Drummers.

   Well, you give birth to 2-3-4 children and you fix the balance. As it has been since the dawn of time. It's very simple...

   In our family there is no money, no money. That's why it's a family. The money is common, it doesn't matter who earns how much. Some families with separate money are very funny to me ... but the selfish ones of all kinds.

   Well done girl, good topic! Now the feminists will jump against you - one category will say that the payments are the duties of the man and have nothing to do with the independence of women in the family and in society, and the other category will clearly emphasize that she does not allow a single lev received from a man. Both categories are unmarried feminist, only after they marry and have children do they see some truths, but not all of course. My wife was a feminist before she married me, and even after a while. I will not describe. We now have three children and have been married for 15 years. Well, she's a normal woman. It's okay to be a university lecturer, etc. Just look at life realistically, not with pink glasses.

   I do not see anything wrong with paying, they have the opportunity. If it's on the bill, let her pay, it doesn't mean the woman doesn't pay anything.

   As a man, I tell you that it would be a compliment for me to pay the woman's bill. Don't feel uncomfortable, just allow the man to feel like a man by pampering you with something small, but to be a woman and to be symbolically cared for. Do not take away the role of the man. It's like feeling uncomfortable that your husband changed the light bulb in the living room for you. Well, of course, he will change her - he has female and male roles. Would you like him to feel uncomfortable that he can't give birth to your future child instead of you? Of course, I specify that I do not tolerate exploitation and mercantilism, but a treat is not something special. At least in my family, my respect for my wife does not come from whether or not I give her money, but from her qualities and her attitude towards me. And as long as we have trust and love, I don't feel it as a burden.

   Your observations, author, are on the sidelines. The fact that, purely technically, the man took out his wallet does not mean that his content was won only by him. In most families, the budget is formed by both. Before the man paid at the gas station, the woman bought products and cooked. He will pay in the restaurant, but she chose him and bought him a new winter coat. He will pay for her bag at the mall, but she has taken curtains for the living room and a dining set. In this spirit. The line cannot be drawn.

   Come out with me, author, I have no money and I can't pay anything, so you will never feel ashamed!

   Unlike you, I've never seen men pay for everything. Maybe that's my environment. In all my relationships I have paid for everything myself, including this one. I almost never received any gifts. Apparently these men really love their wives and are men in place, they have and they pay. I don't see anything wrong with that. It is not right to compete with men for money, because you will lose your role as a woman and this will not lead to anything. When they make you gifts or gestures, when they want to pay, leave them.

   In our family we keep our money together, discuss what to buy, go out together and buy - food, clothes, etc. whatever it takes, our bank account is one - in my husband's name and he pays with the card, if something is busy, I take it, I withdraw, if the amount is small, no matter who will pay - me or him. We have no quarrels over money. I don't know how it is with others and I don't care. Let everyone look at his plate. When you don't like someone drawing on you, you tell the person in advance that you want to take your share of the bill and that's it. Not finally presenting the receipt to start an argument in front of the waiter.

   First, nowadays most women work, without their salary few households can support themselves comfortably. Second, when you become pregnant and give birth, much of the care will be on your shoulders, and if the man cannot adequately support you financially, he will be a burden. So you have nothing to feel uncomfortable with, everyone is given something to contribute.

   In our family, the money is in me, I'm a woman, he makes more money, but they all stay in me and when we go to the gas station I give him money to refuel. The fact that the author will see him at the box office does not mean that he has money in his wallet. It's just that in the family we decided to have the money with me because I'm more careful with thieves, more frugal, and I manage the family budget myself and so on for over 24 years. Do I have respect, my word is heard in the family, but I always listen to his, because I think he is smarter, and in most cases we are of the same opinion.

   This is typical for the Bulgarian woman, who wants a man who is old-fashioned - to pay all the bills, to be responsible for everything, to pledge allegiance to her, to offer her marriage and all these things from the past ... But at the same time he also wants to follow the propaganda of feminism that she is completely free, and can do whatever she wants ... unlike him. This, in combination with the proverbial invertebrateness of today's Baltic men, leads to this effect that you describe. Also, if you are impressed, usually the man is more supported, and the woman - "round" and with a very questionable fashion taste. Otherwise, according to your question, there are 2 options: a) People live traditionally, and as in the past the man takes the responsibilities, takes the finances. The woman sits on her ass, does not break, does not go to make a career. That is, the man pays, because the woman has agreed to make and maintain the family. This was the idea at the time - the man works outside, the woman inside. Read, for example, what Jung says on the subject. b) The woman and the man are free to do whatever they want. Everyone pays the bill equally, there are children, there are none, according to how they understand each other. They also do not have common property. They live with the idea that something better can come tomorrow and the other can break. In this case, no one owes anyone and everything is 50-50. Medium option NO. Many of both sexes try to play it, usually at the expense of the other. Just as it is not right for a man to tie a woman to look after his children, and for him to hunt and give his money for prostitutes ... It is also not right for a woman to suck a man's resources, given that he is just having fun, and she is not his wife in the true sense of the word. In both cases it is a whore. Both are a common situation, because in the end they have few principles, and indulge in their natural instincts.

   I have been married for 15 years. It is important for your own self-esteem not to become economically dependent. There are men who feel like men when they bear the costs. Mine is like that. At first I was pushing to share the bills for the apartment. He couldn't stand it well and I stopped. But I didn't stop making money. You never know what will happen. In addition, there are other costs, not just bills. How will a woman take them, will she ask her husband for money, as if she were his child? Absurd. We unite for great things. It turns out that we have more or less equal savings. When we buy a house, the down payment will be equal to both. Besides, when the children come, it somehow happens that their wife picks up the bagel, including paying them for sports and music from her own pocket, clothes, notebooks, trips, everything. Somehow the man is never in class what number of clothes the child is wearing and when he has a trip to pay for on time. It is easier for a woman to pay for herself than to explain everything to him. So when you draw the line there is an alignment. Now, if you're not ok to get paid, say so at the beginning. That way you will find a suitable person. For example, with my husband you would not fit, but with another for sure. But she still left him something masculine. To refuel or drive a car for repairs, something like that. And beware of users. To refuel or drive a car for repairs, something like that. And beware of users. To refuel or drive a car for repairs, something like that. And beware of users.

   It doesn't matter who earns how much, as long as the man earns and pays more, right, number 3.

   Yes, symbiosis. A parasitic symbiosis. The woman is a parasite on the sexual desire of the man, and the man in turn is so strongly interested in having anything. That is, he is ready for anything, even the biggest jokes and humiliations on the part of his wife, if only he had a place to melt his balls.

   Purely as a woman's time and she needs a lot more to achieve the equality you are talking about. For example, a woman with manual labor cannot earn as much as a man. Unless he practices the ancient profession. Unfortunately, women with education also receive lower pay than men worldwide, according to statistics. A woman's appearance also costs more time and money than a man's. I was personally and inherited, at the expense of my brother. After all, time is an irreversible resource, so it is the most valuable thing we have. So, even before they sit in the restaurant, the woman has already invested more resources than the man. He is privileged to share your valuable time and pleasant company and to pay for a dinner is perfectly fine (not to mention buying you cars and apartments). The other, in my opinion, is low self-esteem on both sides. Believe me, even just rummaging for the wallet in your bag is a blow to the dignity of a quality man.

   I explain. If you are a family, then you have a common budget - there is no money for you and mine. In reality, in this situation, it does not matter which of the two will rush to pay - you take them from one box office anyway. However, it is socially acceptable to pay the man - he himself feels better that way, this is his role. There is no man who does not feel proud that he can provide financially for his family and cover his needs. My husband is happy to pay the bills in a restaurant or a shop - he says to himself that if he hasn't taken money with him and I have to pay somewhere for both of them, he feels dumb and out of place. In such cases, if we have gone out somewhere and I have taken money, and he does not happen to be, I give it to him before we enter the store / restaurant so that he can finally pay. We both feel good that way. Before I started a serious relationship and got married, I usually insisted on paying for myself, especially if it was a first date or the relationship was unsettled. I just didn't want to put myself in a dependent position. However, when you have complete trust in the person next to you and share everything anyway, it is nice to feel like a woman and let your partner pay. Not bad if someone wants to make a gesture and it gives him pleasure, and you do not mind to let him. However, to feel ashamed because someone has asked to pay the bill or that you are not equal to him, rather speaks of some kind of displacement and inferiority complex. By the way, it is always clear whether a man is happy to pay the bill, whether he is annoyed and likes or thinks, that by paying the bill he acquires almost rights over the woman - a woman must be a full horse with caps, so as not to find out if this is unpleasant for the partner and or he expects another kind of retribution. To your question whether an eja woman will receive respect if the man brings the money home, I will answer that it depends only on the woman. If a woman belittles herself and does not value herself, then it is only a matter of time before the man next to her starts looking at her that way. Similarly, if a woman voluntarily puts herself in a vulnerable position, but clearly outlines the boundaries, what attitude is acceptable and what is not - then the man, if he sees that she is serious and that he will not really tolerate certain manifestations, or will comply with it , or just won't be together. If the woman shows that no matter what the other party does, she will always be there and available, it is natural that her partner will play her horse as he wants. I have seen examples of men who treat their girlfriend / wife ugly, but not only have respect for another friend or next wife, but also behave literally as different people, as if someone has replaced them - that is, the woman determines itself limits its attitude and behavior to them.

   The complexes came together and began spitting on feminism. No matter how much you spit, gentlemen, you can't stop us. Feminism is gaining more and more popularity, worldwide. Swallow this fact at last. Otherwise, you will be sitting alone, as before. And from so much spitting, do not drip. Remember that hatred does not come from feminism, but from you and your boundless complexes. It's so obvious, it's funny. Remember also that hatred poisons the hater, not the hated, and there is nothing you can do to us. You destroy yourself, then your feminism is to blame ... There is no pleasure for you. You call women either gold diggers (which isn't always the case), or whores, or feminists, phaha. Get used to the fact that nowadays it is difficult to find such a stupid woman to make a maid, a breeding cow and a sex doll. No way. :)

   If he washes and irons himself, if he cooks and cleans himself, if we take turns changing the sheets and washing the toilet, I'm ok to share the costs. But will he go out of work for every 2, 4, 6 diapers? Or will he drive the night shift with the baby? And if the child is sick, will he be absent from work for a week every month? Or will we alternate 3 years of motherhood, 3 years of fatherhood? And pregnancy, childbirth and breastfeeding, how will we divide them equally? Will we pay a surrogate mother or an hour?

   The author. Thank you very much, dear people. I wish happiness to all. Greetings

   If you still want to understand, author, get married, create a home and children, take care of them and you will understand. Life teaches us everything. And in order to receive, you must always give.

   Number 21, obviously just how much you have no idea about feminism. Some people are not capable of objective analysis. And you are obviously pathetic ...

   If I have to analyze the opinion of number 7 (I quote it): "Your observations, author, are aside. The fact that purely technically the man took out his wallet does not mean that its contents were won only by him. In most families The budget is formed by both.Before the man paid at the gas station, the woman bought products and cooked.He will pay in the restaurant, but she chose and bought him a new winter coat.He will pay for her bag in the mall, but she took the curtains for the living room and the dining set. In that spirit. The line cannot be drawn. "- In most families, only the man brings money home and the woman households. In the case of older families who were active during communism and at the beginning of the transition after the 1990s, there was greater equality between the number of working men and women, but then the state policy was simply that there should be no unemployment and that everyone should be engaged in some activity. But in the vast majority of families aged 30-40, working men predominate and women are at home. The same thing happens with young families aged 18-25 with children, as many women who are in a hurry to catch a man and give birth to a child purposefully strive for the role of "mother profession", which will provide them with at least 10 years. standing at home or walking outside, under the pretext that otherwise there is no one to raise the child while the man is at work. These mothers conveniently avoid the fact that as long as their child is in kindergarten (all year round) or school (9 months a year), they could easily work. And if they want to be at home all day, they can find work from home. I have such acquaintances - the mother after a one-month course became a freelance graphic designer and works from home, looking after their young child, while the father works in the same profession, but in the service of a company and is paid more. - If the woman bought food from the store, there is no mention of whose money she spends, but we all know that in 99% of cases this money is given in advance by the man or the woman uses his bank card for payment. I witness this every day in a number of grocery stores, clothing stores, cinemas, restaurants, etc .. For cooking, I agree that in most families it is done by the woman (precisely because they have divided their roles in the beginning and the man brings the money home). In more modern young families, both sometimes cook, but the woman rarely works if she is also a mother at the time. - How often does a woman buy a man's winter coat? And not with his, but with her money? Once every 5 years? Or rather never? And how often will the man pay the restaurant bills? How many times do they go to a restaurant. And this can be every day, every other day, at least once a week ... But it is not once every 5 years or never, as is the case with the covenant coat. Number 7 did not even say how often the man pays for the woman's clothes, as well as for countless other expenses. We conveniently skip this truth, don't we? - He paid for her bag in the RUM (it is certainly one of the many purchases he makes for her, and women like to change their bags quite often because they are still not happy with the current one they have; therefore, many women have several bags), while she would buy curtains (which can last 10 years or more) and a dining set (which is enough to use 10-30 years in advance if not broken by clumsy hands). Both the curtains and the tableware are for common use, but number 7 gives them as an example, as if the woman pays for them and is supposedly a gain of the man! - Also, it is convenient to remain silent about who bought the car, whose fuel (along with tax, insurance, vignettes and parking fees) the man pays out of pocket. Let's not forget the home, which is almost always owned by the man and not the woman. If it is common (mostly for young families), then both pay it, and in almost all such cases the man pays a much larger share than the woman. An acquaintance recently found a husband and is already pregnant by him, not stopping to brag about how they pay for their common home. The truth is, that he accepted her in his home when he had already repaid BGN 10,000 from the housing loan, and in addition took her to work with his own car. Their salaries are almost the same, as they work in a company, but the difference is that while in recent years she spent money on clothes, phones, jewelry, bags, traveling with friends, etc., he lived modestly and collected money to invest in your future! Against the background of the many men with their own homes who have taken a woman homeless, I have so far met only four women who have their own home and have taken a man with them. And here's the interesting thing! Three of them had been bought by their parents, and the third by her ex-wealthy boyfriend because she let him cum in it several times a day and fulfilled all his fantasies in bed. In other words, none of these four women had given a lev for the purchase of these homes, but had received it as a gift. To be technically honest, at least one of them worked with all her holes against the acquisition of the apartment, so she still made some effort and deserved it because of the deal. I agree with number 7 that "the line cannot be drawn" when comparing who pays how much, as it is to the detriment of the man. Kifloprizemitel

   Once again I am convinced that Bulgarian pigs (men) are complete villains, drummers, complexes and hate women. Absolutely nothing happens to you. I bet that everyone who has commented so far is a jerk. Your opinions are not valid. Number 21 / female, 22 years old.

   Number 26, a pretty Jesuit analysis of my opinion. I have no idea what your social environment is like, but for a man to whine about the fact that, poor thing, he is forced to take care of his family is a pity. Here men are constantly contradicting each other. If a woman works, goes home and goes to bed on the couch, she is a careerist and a nasty feminist. If she sits at home, embroiders and relies on her husband, then she is mercantile. Understand that the real horror is the creature you dream of, who is on his feet from dark to dark, earns the family money, keeps the house like a magazine, cooks like a master chef, dundurka children, is madly in love with you, looks like a model and is always hooked on sex. So, if you happen to run into a woman like that, get ready for a real nightmare, because all these roles are completely incompatible, and if a mentally healthy woman decides to combine them somehow, she will not stay that way for long. My husband saw himself in a miracle precisely because I try to be all this. He told me a hundred times to slow down because I had nervous breakdowns at least twice a month; I even got to the hospital. And why? Because it was suggested by such "men" as 26 that it should be so. Yes, the mothers of my generation are also to blame, because they also put it in our heads. Otherwise, for the record, number 26, both our apartment in Sofia and our villa are mine. My Sofia apartment is inherited from my parents, but I bought the villa myself. My husband has no part but to mow the lawn with the lawn mower I bought again. I also bought the car. I work in three places, he's nine to five at work, our salaries are the same. The household is entirely my concern. He didn't buy any socks himself and he doesn't even know where the pants are sold. I really want to be normal. I want to relax on the man's shoulder, to feel protected and protected, but if I don't pay for electricity this month, we'll just stay in the dark and cold. I don't respect people's laziness, but what do you really want from us? How are you different from muffins, which expect gifts and privileges without moving a finger? Aren't you ashamed to grumble about having to take care of your families? Have you heard your grandfather complain that he bought a delicacy for your grandmother? And the great bills you pay us! For a normal man, it is a public disgrace for a lady to take out her purse in a public place - I know that from my father (I have never seen my mother even punch a ticket in a tram when they were together). I also observe my friends: they would rather postpone the meeting if they have financial difficulties than blush while counting the pennies in half. Personally, I have no material problems, no housing, no emotional, no professional, no social, no problems. Only my independence creates problems for me, because my husband shared that sometimes he feels unnecessary and says: "What am I for you?" I am reasonable enough to give him the opportunity to appear as a man, asking him for small services such as "Change the light bulb", "Make me a cocktail", etc., so that he feels useful. Otherwise it will become quite complex. And so the circle closes. You want us alone, but then you feel unnecessary. You want us meek slaves, but you will not support us. You want us to share the costs, but somehow, if we can, we don't work. I really don't understand what this is about ...

   Yes, he will receive respect. Because the more men invest time and money in a woman, the more they accept her and it would be difficult to part with her. The man gives material things and the woman gives immaterial things, such as love, attention and home comfort.

   Wait, people, when the whole family is somewhere, I almost always carry the money for the simple reason that I have a bag and a purse. My husband rarely carries a bag, he prefers to put his phone and keys in his pocket. This does not mean that I necessarily took them out, they are common with us, as everyone puts a certain amount for the monthly budget. We didn't think it was a humiliation for him :-) Besides, I don't care about public opinion. In fact, over the years there was a period in which we took more or less equal salaries, then he received more, then he was out of work, now for some time I receive more. If he was complex, he didn't show it. You made it so humiliating, my things change, sometimes a person is up, then down, life is a wheel. That's why we are a team, to support each other

   To number 7/28 from number 26. You make the huge mistake of complaining here about your husband transferring responsibilities to you, and at the same time you attribute this softness of his (or cunning, because you still consciously tolerate him) to all other men. With these generalizations you only show how far you are from objectivity! Even if we assume in theory that your words are not a fabrication and that you actually bought the villa, not your husband, you are one of the extremely rare exceptions, which are probably one thousandth of women. Because in the other 999 cases in the families with a villa, the man is the one who bought it, or they bought it together. As for the "equal" (in your opinion) expenses, will they still seem so equal to you, if we turn the examples given by you personally !? The woman should be the sole or main bearer of money at home. The man should not work or work and receive a low salary. The man should buy a woman's winter coat (once every 5 years, and maybe never), and the woman should pay the bill every time she goes out to a restaurant. The woman should pay at the gas station (including the one she bought the car; she also pays all taxes and fees, service, inspections, etc.), and the man should buy food (most likely with the woman's money) and cook . The woman should buy a bag for the man, and he should buy a tableware and curtains for common use from both of them, but try them on as a gift for her! Now do you see how your examples make you bitter, because I will not export this kind of "sharing" of expenses to any woman !? When you want to show how the two sexes share the costs equally, give unbiased examples, not as uneven as yours! It is also impressive how you try to twist an honestly shared opinion like "whining". You will not succeed! Every sensible man is aware of these vile female tricks very clearly. My opinion is not convenient for you and for those women who want to be in a better position than men and for them equality should be there only when they want rights (man and woman should be equal, but the woman should be more equal), but when it comes to obligations, they abruptly change the plate and transfer the responsibility to the man. Kifloprizemitel who in every way want to be in a better position than the man and for them equality should be there only when they want rights (the man and the woman are equal, but the woman is more equal), but when it comes to obligations, sharply they change the plate and transfer the responsibility to the man. Kifloprizemitel who in every way want to be in a better position than the man and for them equality should exist only when they want rights (the man and the woman are equal, but the woman is more equal), but when it comes to obligations, sharply they change the plate and transfer the responsibility to the man. Kifloprizemitel

   I know for myself that I can't be with a man who has less money than me, I just don't respect him enough and I can't take him seriously. It seems to me dependent, insecure, unstable. I had a neighbor who got a high-paying job and started calling her favorite sex toy, she thought she was very funny, but it was quite unpleasant. My husband tells me to collect money and have it, he incurs a lot of expenses. I gladly participate in various purchases when I can. There were times when I didn't have a job, it didn't cause a problem, but I felt bad.

   Absolutely right, number 31. That's exactly the way it is with us. The "inverted" examples you are, in fact, are completely true. Everything you write is the truth itself. And it really made me cringe because I turned to something like a man in a skirt. The only thing that contradicts your assumptions is that my husband cooks. No, he can't and doesn't do it, I buy the products and prepare them. I agree with you that such families are unpopular, but there are - I know a bunch of other women who do the same thing because their partner is doing worse. Just last night, before I read your post, my husband (who I don't complain about because he has other qualities) complained that he was tired of the car hanging out at service stations forever (I was tired of paying for these repairs, too). ), so he bought a Citroen, which he will buy on Saturday, so that I can withdraw money until then. From my account, of course, his is always empty. And I will do it because we need a car. And yes, the other day he bought me a knife for cutting meat and gave it to me as a gift, but I took the steaks for his friends' barbecue, and he bought sunglasses for 160 leva. Don't get me wrong - I can, I do. The bad thing is when it becomes a stereotype of behavior. Of the type: everything that is mine is mine, everything that belongs to my wife is common. I bought the villa in question cheaply from a relative who moved to the United States, renovated it and it became beautiful. My husband was involved in personal labor - he replaced the electrical installation and took care of the garden structures. But the materials, the work of the masters, the very observation of the reconstruction process - was my concern. My husband just put on his slippers, sat on the terrace under the umbrella, poured himself a drink and said, "Well,

   From number 26/31 to number 7/28/33. I quote you: "It's bad when it becomes a stereotype of behavior. Like: everything mine is mine, everything my wife has is common." I completely agree with you here, and that is exactly what I meant in my previous opinion. Leaving aside some very, very rare exceptions like you (and if your statements are true), as well as older women, who to some extent at least invest from themselves, most Bulgarian women of childbearing age everywhere consider the man's money for common and keep him paying for everything or almost everything, while for their money they want to remain their own.

   Abe, are you crazy, what do you fight only for money, who gave how much, who ate what, who paid where ... crazy work! And where is the love left? If this is the real people in Bulgaria, I'm just happy that I don't live there! I hope there are others, more normal! I am happy when I buy things for the woman next to me, I enjoy bringing her breakfast in bed, making her coffee, cooking for her, making her happy with a gift or dinner in some cool place, it makes me happy! I never counted how much I gave, I make money to spend on it in the end, she also took me on vacations and made me great gifts, we never shared money or anything! You better stay alone when you are annoyed to spend on someone else, you do not become a family, you are selfish thinking!

   Complexers are like that because they are brought up by complexion women. You know, the men you're complaining about are MOM'S sons. They didn't have fathers, their fathers were under a slipper, or they were abused by complex fathers ... or all that together. So that the role of the woman in the family can take over. It's very funny to me when you start with artificial eyelashes, tits and 2 tons of putty and oil paint on top of you to start complaining about the "complex men", even if you put them under one denominator. No men dear ladies yes, fact. We disappeared. You killed us. We prefer not to deal with you at all and to die quietly and peacefully. Only you and your vain feminist egocentrism remain in this world. As for the author. I will only give you one piece of advice. Learn to be a woman BEFORE everything! Men need to give, to feel wanted, useful and needed. Do not displace them from their role.

   People, the question in the title is different, let's not move the topic. The girl asks experienced women "HOW DID THEY LEARN TO RECEIVE FROM MEN". Pay attention to the word "GET". She wants to receive, you know, to consume frantically and indefinitely, not even for her child, but for nbeya herself, she wants to RECEIVE you understand, she does not want advice on family planning, budgets, finances and distribution, she wants to RECEIVE, do you understand the greatness and tragedy of her issue? She wants to RECEIVE, dear people .... for God's sake, she wants to RECEIVE .......