I am 19 years old. I have a friend recently. We have been together for a month and if I continue like this I will lose it. My friend is polite, takes care of me, hardworking, smart, sex is okay, of course ... but I can't see him more than once a week (EVEN THAT IS A LOT). He wants us to see each other every day, to stay with them - and I don't want to. I can't imagine falling asleep next to him and ... not specifically with him at all, but in general - to fall asleep peacefully next to a man. When we are together for two days in a row, I don't feel well, the feeling is as if I'm suffocating, I get up, I want to get away from him. He is not my first boyfriend .. I did not have this problem with the first boy we had a relationship with .. now I don't know what is happening. I'm going crazy. From the side it looks like I'm pulling at him, I'm closed, he shares my freedom, he gives me time, and I ...
I behave inappropriately. When we both lie down and talk, for example, I get nervous, I want to go home sooner, I don't share anything with him, but I feel that he has something, I have so many thoughts and things that I want to share with him, but something it stops me. It's the same when we have sex - I'm still not completely calm and I don't relax. I would even say that I do not feel so much pleasure, but it is not because of him .. something emotional in me is wrong. I feel anxious and scared ... of being close to someone. I like my boyfriend. I do not want to separate, but if I continue like this, separation is inevitable. We talked about my behavior and he told me that I had to seriously change my behavior otherwise ... according to him, this way we have no future. Is this normal?
Did anyone else have the same fears? I don't share anything with him, but I feel that there is something, I have so many thoughts and things that I want to share with him, but something stops me. It's the same when we have sex - I'm still not completely calm and I don't relax. I would even say that I do not feel so much pleasure, but it is not because of him .. something emotional in me is wrong. I feel anxious and scared ... of being close to someone. I like my boyfriend. I do not want to separate, but if I continue like this, separation is inevitable. We talked about my behavior and he told me that I had to seriously change my behavior otherwise ... according to him, this way we have no future. Is this normal?
Did anyone else have the same fears? I don't share anything with him, but I feel that there is something, I have so many thoughts and things that I want to share with him, but something stops me. It's the same when we have sex - I'm still not completely calm and I don't relax. I would even say that I do not feel so much pleasure, but it is not because of him .. something emotional in me is wrong. I feel anxious and scared ... of being close to someone. I like my boyfriend. I do not want to separate, but if I continue like this, separation is inevitable. We talked about my behavior and he told me that I had to seriously change my behavior otherwise ... according to him, this way we have no future. Is this normal? Did anyone else have the same fears? It's the same when we have sex - I'm still not completely calm and I don't relax. I would even say that I do not feel so much pleasure, but it is not because of him .. something emotional in me is wrong.
I feel anxious and scared ... of being close to someone. I like my boyfriend. I do not want to separate, but if I continue like this, separation is inevitable. We talked about my behavior and he told me that I had to seriously change my behavior otherwise ... according to him, this way we have no future. Is this normal? Did anyone else have the same fears? It's the same when we have sex - I'm still not completely calm and I don't relax. I would even say that I do not feel so much pleasure, but it is not because of him .. something emotional in me is wrong. I feel anxious and scared ... of being close to someone. I like my boyfriend. I do not want to separate, but if I continue like this, separation is inevitable. We talked about my behavior and he told me that I had to seriously change my behavior otherwise ... according to him, this way we have no future. Is this normal?
Did anyone else have the same fears? We talked about my behavior and he told me that I had to seriously change my behavior otherwise ... according to him, this way we have no future. Is this normal? Did anyone else have the same fears? We talked about my behavior and he told me that I had to seriously change my behavior otherwise ... according to him, this way we have no future. Is this normal? Did anyone else have the same fears?
Answers 14
So how do you like him so much and still pull away from him? You look like that "privileged friends" only for sex and come on ... Get a little change, there's no point in making the guys fall in love with you and then fuck them. M 20
I don't know why you think you like him. Both your subconscious and your body reject it.
"My boyfriend is polite, takes care of me, hardworking, smart, sex is okay, of course." pleasure "- I have long been excited about this behavior of women, in one topic I asked a question, but no one answered, obviously women can not answer, what exactly are they looking for in a man? It is clear about the biological purpose of a man that in order for life to continue there must be insemination, but what else do women find attractive? The author herself says that sex is OK, but at the same time she suffocates from the man's closeness to her !? How does it happen, both to feel disgust and to enjoy the same person !? It turns out that when women are self-satisfied, they feel more pleasure, even in a topic I read,
I don't think it's very normal, because how will you one day live with a man and have a family? If you don't pursue this in your life, you won't have such a problem.
I don't think you really like this one, since you didn't have such a problem with the previous one. However, it is strange how you could force yourself to be with this one ... If he really liked you, he wouldn't tell you that you have to 'change your behavior' - it sounds as if he was said by some strict and egocentric parent ... or teacher.
The woman is the only creature to whom if you give her 10 bags she will choose the most expensive one, and if she has to choose 10 men she will choose the stupidest one. That's them. They love men who hurt them, and they call the right man "you're my friend."
What do you like about it, when you are sick of it. Your subconscious doesn't want it and it pushes you away. Or you don't want to be alone and cling to him.
Apparently you just don't really like him. If you really like someone, you will want to always be with them, you would always want to look for them, to see them, to share them. Maybe you're just under the illusion that you like him. I also had something similar with my ex-boyfriend, whom I gave a second chance to, but I had neither experienced my previous separation nor felt the same way. I didn't like him, I didn't want to share it with him. And then I broke up with him because I didn't really like him. The situation is similar with you. Although, as I said, something similar happened to me, but it's a sign that you don't like it. Maybe you have such an illusion because of certain features of it that you like. But so, I advise you to tell him what you really feel, because in this way you are unconsciously playing with his feelings. Success! :)
The problem may be caused by something side. For example, if you have any family problems or misunderstandings with your parents, it is perfectly normal to become more and more closed to the outside world. It may seem that one has nothing to do with the other, but all these problems inevitably affect personal life and relationships.
I did not see any adequate comments. I would recommend that you think about whether you really like it, and try to look back on whether something from your past relationship has traumatized you in such a way as to change the way you see boys ... I can't think of anything else is ...
He was polite and kind ... You appreciate him, but you don't like him. There is a difference. You force yourself to be with him because he's a good boy. Who knows how boring and crazy he is when he doesn't attract you. The woman's heart is looking for a womanizer, a plebeian, not Marino's son. I soon kissed a man like yours. The good boy, handsome. Egati dumb kiss. Zero passion, as if he doesn't know at 30 how to kiss. Mega annoys me that she talks about things like in a textbook. A terrible moralist, he is congested for me. His mother let him get married, and he thinks he has an opinion of his own. Let him think. When mom says women, she will immediately look for something serious. So it was with me. He didn't look for me for three years, he suddenly thought of me. Egati coincidence. I'm tired of morels.
Don't be fooled that you like it. If you don't enjoy being with him, there's no point in forcing yourself. It has happened to me as well, there is no other way out but separation.
Don't listen to the comments above. The problem is not that you don't like it. You have a fear of intimacy. This is a kind of phobia on a mental level. Search the internet for intimacy phobia or intimacy phobia. It's probably related to your family. For example, if yours treated you badly or treated you too short. Think about where it might come from. Find the root. If that doesn't help, see a psychologist. You'll be fine, calm down. Talk to your friend, tell him about it and if he really loves you, he will understand you and try to help you.
Incompatible pheromones.