Hello. I'm almost 18 years old, but I'm not happy at all. I don't have any self-confidence, I don't like myself when I walk the streets, I have the feeling that people are watching me and secretly laughing at me. I have no social life, I only go out to the store. When I do something, then I always worry about whether I did it right, I hope I didn't make a big mistake or something. I just can't stand it, I'm not doing well. However, I have dreams, I know what I want to learn. I want to work abroad, but as we Bulgarians do not like us, no wonder they crush me there. I'm also worried, especially when I meet new people. I'm just a wreck. I can't stand it mentally. When I was in 7th grade, there was a boy who harassed and humiliated me every break, well, we were in the same class for only one year - then I went to high school. Please, give me advice on how to boost my self-esteem and learn to like myself, at least a little. Thanks in advance!
Answers 10
It will not happen the first time .. Block the things that lower your self-confidence, ie stop thinking negatively. People don't pay as much attention to a person as you think. Why do you think you will be crushed abroad? I have been to Italy, where people are kinder than Bulgarians, however, each person is different, it does not matter if you are Bulgarian or American. Start repeating to yourself several times every day "I'm strong, I can", "I will succeed" and everything will be fine, it's not scary. I recommend you go to a psychologist (there is a free one at school), don't worry, he won't eat :) Do you know what's the worst? You agree with everyone, you do not say "your" opinion, but you try to please others - be yourself, even if you fail the first time. The time spent in Italy made me believe that there are good people. I was harassed - now no one can do anything to me, I will counter it. I'm sure that behind the monitor hides a wonderful, smart, good girl :) I wish you luck and I hope everything goes well :) 16-year-old boy
Hey, I'm just like you. I want to help you, and I can't even help myself. Whenever I go out, I think everyone looks at me strangely and laughs at me. When I enter the trolley I start imagining that they are speaking against me ... they can really do it, I can make it up. I don't have a gram of self-confidence, I always find flaws, and there are people who are really useless, but have too much self-confidence. Just look at things positively and think you're fine, because I'm convinced you're a beautiful girl without knowing you. Decent people usually don't have a good opinion of themselves, and it shouldn't be. Find activities such as sports, music, painting, reading books, watching movies. For example, I do this because I don't have many friends and it became clear to me that they are all users. I feel good staying alone and finding interests. Regarding this abroad, I also have such goals, but to work, not to study there. Emphasize the language and this will further distract your thoughts and you will not think so negatively. If you really don't like yourself, change something, but for yourself, not for others, just to like them. I think that when you finish everything will change. Don't make the same mistakes as before, make friends with new people and so on. F 17 made friends with new people and so on. F 17 made friends with new people and so on. F 17
I do not agree with comment number 1. I was also in Italy and I received Italians in our country and I spent a lot of time with them and I don't like them at all. I remember that when a group came here on exchange, led by my class and other people from school, we went to a restaurant, we rented it all and invited them to the big tables with us, and they only separated the Italians at another table and pretended, that they do not know who we are and because several people knew both languages and told me that they said that the Bulgarians are terrible and I hope we do not go to them, but to sit here. Finally we begged them and they came to us, but again they sat opposite us next to each other instead of moving between us and all the time they were on expensive phones and cameras and taking pictures of their food constantly, what they eat, what they watch, what they read, everything documented. They didn't even talk that much to each other. They made a very bad impression on me, it was the same when we went there. They thought of themselves as a great nation. I do not like them. Otherwise, regarding your self-confidence, find out exactly what you don't like about yourself, your hair color, your weight, your smile. I advise you to find a picture of a girl you like and find her beautiful and do something from day to day to get closer to her image, if she is blonde blush, if she is thin, lose weight, if she has straight teeth, and yours are curved then fix them, depending on how you look. Don't copy it, just make it beautiful. I am the same as you, everything you described to me is one to one. I have a favorite model and from day to day I buy like a garment, I changed my hairstyle like hers, so I already like myself. I'm also pretty weak,
You believed a lot and took your life too seriously. People on the streets only look at you for sure ... they have no other job. You are not the most important in the world. So ... let go of the notion of negative expectations. Let you have real expectations - do you look so hyper bad that everyone is watching you? Probably if you have an artificial wooden eye and half of your head is naked, they will look at you. But is that so?
You need a little more sex, go to 2 3s and you will see that everything will fall into place ... :)
Number 3, everyone is different, there is no need for unnecessary arguments. The topic is not directly related to what kind of people the Italians or the Americans are, I will tell you only 1 thing ... The school where I studied was full of positive people, there was no classmate who would say "hey, you are what you are". By the way, my 8th grade classmates in Italy invited me to my birthday :) Whatever you tell me, Italians as a nation are much better in every way, even the students are excellent. Still, everyone is different, don't talk like that "the American is nasty", I don't believe you would be happy to say "Bulgarians are the lowest", right? Before attacking a certain nation, you have to think about whether "everyone" or just "someone" anyway ... I basically wanted to give advice to the author, not to talk about people abroad;
I completely understand you because I have the same problem, which at times is unbearable :( Now I'm 19. As a child I was beautiful and had a happy childhood, but from the age of 13-14 I changed. I stopped liking myself. I have a horribly ugly face and I can't look like most girls who already have boyfriends at 15. Not that this is my biggest problem, especially when I compare myself to my classmates, who especially some of them have perfect faces and sometimes with tears in their eyes. I shout, "Why me? What did I do to deserve it?" Almost no one communicates with me like that. Over time, this has become a fear in me that I'm unlikely to be able to overcome. to raise one's self-esteem, but in fact it is much harder than they think, because they do not have this problem, for which they should be grateful!
Hey, I was like you at 18, I had exactly the same problems. The truth is that people very rarely look at someone, engrossed in their own affairs and insecurities. And if they look at you, they will forget you. And why does the opinion of someone on the street matter to you? You are now at that age, but in a few years your self-esteem will be much better, it usually comes with life experience. I also have some practical advice. As you walk down the street or enter a store, transportation, etc. you forced yourself to stare at people. You will see that no one is as scary as you imagine. I did it precisely because of my fear that someone was always watching and judging me and I noticed a lot of tired and bored people, no one cared about anyone else. No one was a super-man who thought he was above me.
Oh, I forgot to write something in the last comment. Please do NOT do what number 3 advises you to do - rely on appearance to improve your self-esteem. It is very wrong to base it on such a thing - it leads to even bigger problems in the future! I have a good friend who gets hysterical if someone sees her without makeup (and she's a nice girl). You are smart, I think you will guess that the value of people is not determined by clothes and how much they look like a model. True, supporting yourself gives you some confidence, but that's just the foundation. From personal experience I tell you that communication with people is the best for us, no matter how difficult it is for people like us. When you go to university, everyone will be more or less scared and then it's time to meet people. It helped me a lot - I took small steps, I was friendly and really people, with whom I communicated during my student years worked wonders for my self-esteem. And number 3, how can you draw a conclusion about a NATION just because of the behavior of a small group of people, what nonsense. As someone who has been abroad for years, I can tell you that there is not a single nation where people do not gather en masse in groups in a community with different nations. I don't like that either, but it's completely normal and understandable. The Bulgarians do the same, perhaps even more so than the Italians. I don't like that either, but it's completely normal and understandable. The Bulgarians do the same, perhaps even more so than the Italians. I don't like that either, but it's completely normal and understandable. The Bulgarians do the same, perhaps even more so than the Italians.
From the author: thank you for the comments! I am now more hopeful for my future.