Hello. I am writing this topic because I just want to share with someone how I feel. Eventually (rather than 1-2 years) I started blaming myself for the least and feeling bad. Here's an example: I'm walking down the street home, and I see an elderly woman selling flowers sitting in a small chair with a slightly tortured expression. She sits and hopes that someone will buy a flower from her, but this does not happen often. And just as I passed her, I felt sorry for her, but for some reason I didn't stop taking a flower from her, or just giving her some money. Then I must have been thinking about this all night. Here is another example: we are walking with friends around the city center and we see a girl, young, more or less like me (I am 18), sitting on the ground on a blanket and painting. We stopped and looked at what he had drawn, and dropped a few pennies, as we told her how beautiful her drawings were. Later in the evening I went home, recovered, and went to bed, but did not fall asleep. I thought of sitting there all day, hunched over on the ground, painting for some measly money. I don't know why I felt guilty for not helping more by helping as much as I could. And so I thought about it almost all night, and then I thought of the woman with the flowers and many other examples, and I felt mega guilty of not helping everyone as much as I could and had the opportunity.
And so it has happened to me super many times. To think about some such incidents, and start blaming myself. What advice would you give me so I don't feel that way? I don't know why I felt guilty for not helping more by helping as much as I could. And so I thought about it almost all night, and then I thought of the woman with the flowers and many other examples, and I felt mega guilty of not helping everyone as much as I could and had the opportunity. And so it has happened to me super many times. To think about some such incidents, and start blaming myself. What advice would you give me so I don't feel that way? I don't know why I felt guilty for not helping more by helping as much as I could. And so I thought about it almost all night, and then I thought of the woman with the flowers and many other examples, and I felt mega guilty of not helping everyone as much as I could and had the opportunity. And so it has happened to me super many times. To think about some such incidents, and start blaming myself. What advice would you give me so I don't feel that way? and start blaming myself. What advice would you give me so I don't feel that way? and start blaming myself. What advice would you give me so I don't feel that way?
Answers 5
In my opinion, you are actually afraid of falling into a situation similar to theirs - something that you find a failure. The grandmother probably has a pension and where to live, she does not sink into luxury, she earns a little on top, but how could you help her so much in the long run. The girl must be an artist in love with the craft, who likes to work outdoors.
This is some form of goodness. Looking for the problem in yourself, but it is wrong to do it constantly, because people are nasty and will take advantage every time you are good with them. Do not do it. It must be balanced.
I think you have an obsessive neurosis. It seems like compassion, but it's not good not to be able to switch off topic all night. You are not calm internally about something else and it kills you. It is subconscious. You are very worried about something that has nothing to do with them.
Congratulations .... most people are idiots who blame others and take no responsibility for anything ... YOU .. you know how to put yourself in the place of others and realize that someone still has to help the world and the only person for whom you remember ... so this is a good thing ... just the idea is to realize that you can't help everyone .... I'm basically the same ... when I see a beggar, for example, I feel sorry and he wanted me to be able to help him .... that's why my goal is to succeed, and he became rich and so on the one hand they will not fall into the same situation, and on the other hand I will be able to help such people ... but the first step to success is ... take the blame .... because that's how you realize that everything depends on YOU
I'm the same and I'll tell you over the years what I've discovered - it starts from early childhood and is related to guilt and excessive narcissism (to think of yourself as more important than you really are). I constantly have an internal conflict over whether to give money to beggars, for example. Another example: I once gave a cigar to a beggar because I didn't have a cigarette and told him that it was not inhaled in the lungs, but he was drunk and did not hear me and seemed to start smoking it. Then for 3 days I blamed myself that because cigars are more harmful than cigarettes, and he inhaled it, I contribute to his development of diseases related to smoking in him, and so on ... And the truth is that it practically does not matter. In reality, you will help the grandmother with 1-2 leva, but there will be hundreds of thousands of poor people in Bulgaria, and hundreds of millions around the world.