Hello! This year I will be in 10th grade, I am 16 years old, I have few but good friends, my grades are good, and my experience with boys is zero. I myself feel alone and unloved, most of my acquaintances for years have been whirling with their boyfriends, falling in love, falling out of love, suffering and all the other normal things. I'm beautiful, or so the others convince me. And the boys like me, but ... only up to that point. When it comes time for something more serious, nothing ever happens. I've never kissed in my life, I haven't even "dated" someone that we're boyfriends. There were a few teen outings that didn't work out, of course. But the problem is mainly in me - I can't fall in love. Even if someone becomes nice to me in a few days, it quickly stops being interesting to me. I have not felt for anyone that I can be in touch with him. I don't know if this is normal. Sometimes I think it's possible to be asexual because I've always thought about a relationship on an emotional level and I've never looked at someone with any sexual desire. I can say that boys are rather good friends for me, and when I like someone it's just that way. I know there is time for me. Still, I wonder if, at 16, I am still unable to experience normal human feelings, such as falling in love and having sexual attraction to someone, that there is no problem in myself. I will be happy to know if there is anyone else who feels or has felt the same way and then found their man. I can say that boys are rather good friends for me, and when I like someone it's just that way. I know there is time for me. Still, I wonder if, at 16, I am still unable to experience normal human feelings, such as falling in love and having a sexual attraction to someone, that there is no problem in myself. I will be happy to know if there is anyone else who feels or has felt the same way and then found their man. I can say that boys are rather good friends for me, and when I like someone it's just that way. I know there is time for me. Still, I wonder if, at 16, I am still unable to experience normal human feelings, such as falling in love and having a sexual attraction to someone, that there is no problem in myself. I will be happy to know if there is anyone else who feels or has felt the same way and then found their man.
Answers 7
I (boy) can be impressed by a girl very much .. VERY quickly .. and at the moment to like her .. Some attract me only sexually and others only emotionally .. preferably the latter * I am easily in love just .. I. I can't explain why this happens to you but .. you can really be asexual .. I like that .. that means I guess .. you don't wear provocative clothes .. you don't take pictures half naked .. you don't upload all the time photos for attention and in general all these banal things .. I hope ??? Which will be very good .. and you will hellishly torture the boys after a while at the end of puberty - when you are already awake - in all their beauty .. they will want you .. but this is their problem .. To you if you are well and you do not have problems with this .. everything is OK .. Even in front of me is preferably a girl with whom I can behave naturally ..
Откъде идва дискомфортът? Смяташ, че трябва да се влюбиш? Че си ненормална ако не си хлътнала по някого? Недей смята, че има нещо нередно ако не изпитваш някакво влечение или не си до момента. Това е въпрос на характер - твоя и на този, който търсиш. Редно е да се замислиш какво би искала да притежава такъв човек. Качествата на характера определят въпросния - сдържаност, възпитание, импулс, енергия, спонтанност, каквото ще да е. Ще е твоя задача да знаеш какво търсиш. Така или иначе, момчетата на тази възраст са инфантилни - личността им дори още не се е отделила от пубертета. Това се променя, но иска време. Не е изключено твоят интерес да лежи по-нататък (това не е покана да гониш 30-годишните обаче). Но ето я по-добрата новина: не е нужно да хлътваш. Любовните захласи са забавни, но опъват нервите. Без претенции да те познавам, не звучиш като емоционално мъртва. Изказът ти е сдържан, нямаш недостиг на самочувствие, възпитанието е налице, убеден съм че имаш и тон други качества. До момента (и това е мое мнение, приемай го както щеш) звучиш просто като корав характер - силна, но "дървена" и трудно повлиявана от социални норми (не си хлътвала още, факт). И това е добре. Има цената си, но мисля че в дългосрочен план ще ти е повече от полза. Сега, нещо което бих желал да те помоля: моля те, не се чувствай сама и необичана. Знам, че звучи наставнически и подозрително, но съществуват хора по интернет, които не са пропаднали тролове. Имаш семейство и приятели, те ще те опровергаят. Хората, които са по-сдържани и нямат тази екстраверсия, която други притежават, същите редовно са самотни. Това не е трагедия, има си дори предимства. За моемента мога да ти пожелая да живееш живота си и да не се тревожиш за излишни глупости. Любовта не е нужно да идва с гръм и трясък. Някои хора с времето се научават да оценяват други. Може при тебе да се окаже така. Но просто с времето ще трябва да видиш.
Falling in love as shown in movies and described in love novels is rare ... never to say. If it works, it's for a while. If you live a year or two with someone, you already see him as an ordinary person with whom you go in the same direction. These thrills from the beginning of your relationship disappear, but that does not mean that you are uncomfortable;) In short. When you enjoy communicating with someone, you complement each other, you want to be with him - this is the relationship. Then comes falling in love (maybe the opposite). Sex (you highly praise this sex) will come on its own, especially since it is a kind of pleasant communication;) To be precise, you can do the opposite - to read .... someone with someone and then start a relationship . And it was complicated, but not so much. Success!
I feel the same way. You don't have to start liking someone at first sight, it's even quite superficial. Find a boy whose character you like and go out on dates to get to know him. Then, if you think you like him, you can start a relationship with him.
Okay, can't you build a normal relationship with someone without being in love? Do you have to "handle" something inside to be nice to someone, to kiss them, etc.? In my opinion, there is a love relationship without falling in love - just friendship, a great time together, kisses, caresses, sex ... It is even preferable sometimes - it does not lead to severe suffering, to dramatic divisions, if at some point your paths diverge. .. Think about it!
Wait for your tits to grow and then try. Apparently you're still in your teens. And at 16, he thinks others have been doing something "for years." For how many years - from 3-4? There is one important detail - you have no idea how many lies and embellishments there are around you. Someone liked someone and tells how she is in love, has a friend, etc. And she just looked at it 5 times and decided she liked it. Say you fucked three and you can be sure that almost everyone believes you.
Don't worry unnecessarily! The right time is when you feel ready, not forced! Be honest with yourself and follow your heart. Not you, but your peers are in a hurry to develop and so betray themselves!