My fiancé and I have been engaged for a year and a half, and I still can't tell his mother and father, "mother" and "father." Not that they don't deserve it, but I just can't turn my tongue and it doesn't come out of my mouth. People are very good and it probably hurts that I don't tell them. I am very much asking you for advice, if there is anyone who has experienced this, to write me how to start addressing them properly.
Answers 15
Well, let me tell you, I don't see the point in telling them, after all, you have a mother and a father. Besides, not telling them that has nothing to do with the respect you have for them. After all, we live in other times. I think it's best to address them by name, I also can't and don't want to call "mother" and "father" other than my own parents.
This is the easiest and most convenient option, or just with the names as I told you at the beginning, explain to them that you prefer the American style and you're so used to it or something like that. considering that they are my father's brother and my mother's sister, aren't they, and not some distant relative from the 6th or 7th generation. it's from me I hope I gave you some success guidelines.
I'm a little worried because I used to say "aunt -" and "uncle -" to them, and now suddenly "mom and dad" and they don't seem to expect to hear it from me anymore, but I hope I get used to it. Once or twice, I'll get used to it, but I don't know how it will be the first time.
This is not such a big problem, you will always solve it somehow. It is more important that things go smoothly between you and your future husband and then with the mothers-in-law. You can also tell little names if you think it's appropriate.
As long as they don't complain that you don't call them "mother" and "father", you have no problems. Things will fall into place on their own
You know, every girl who's shy feels that way. As long as your father-in-law and mother-in-law are aware and kind people, give it a try. I think you're more ashamed to say it! :) Get married, as they say with your gentleman law :) And then address them with "mother" and "father". To this day, my cousin's wife still addresses her aunt and uncle in the following way: "Mr. ....", "Mrs. ...." )))))))))))))))))))))
I had the same problem after 1 year of grief / I get up and tell myself today I will tell her mother, I go to bed and I think today I failed, but tomorrow I will succeed / finally I said it's not difficult at all, don't put feeling in the words a colleague I had which used to say when I say mother it's like saying a chair without love, without emotions. It works. Time passed and I spontaneously slept to say mother, we talk without a daughter or mother participating in the dialogue and we have no problems for 12 years. Now I think I was a big fool, that I was worried that I hadn't called them mother and father yet.
What age do you live in? They are not your mother and father, and if they are not angry, so what. Tell them by name or there as you are used to.
Ah, did you ask them what they wanted you to call them? Well, you're not even married to their son, after all! I have been married for a year. Even before the ceremony, my mother-in-law told me: "call me / us as you wish. We do not ask for the address" mother "and" father ". If you want, call us by name, if you want" aunt "and" uncle ". So ... I couldn't roll my tongue either, but they didn't push me. I call them aunt ... and uncle ..... And my husband tells ours by name. My mother had said years ago that she would not allow herself to be called "Grandma." "Grandma is his grandmother!" So don't worry! Talk to them! It doesn't matter how you tell them, it matters how you treat them and whether you understand each other.
English, Americans say about "mother" -mom, momma, mommy, mum, mamma, mater, mammy, mummy, mum, about father - "dad", the French respectively: maman, papa, and if you are modern people, just their say-mother and father are only relatives, I do not want to feel like a stranger when I turn to you and say to small names, something acceptable and already very common
Hello, she is the author again. I just want to tell you that we have been married for a year and a half and that is still a problem for me. Thank you very much for the advice, but I don't think I will turn to them at all.
Abe, tell people they deserve it, hey, hey! Do it, what so much already!
Say by name, this is the best possible. Mom and Dad are called to THEIR parents. Nor should your husband shout at your parents except by name. I am strongly opposed to calling mom and dad to strangers, no matter which country.
My mother-in-law made her own mouth. I am also of the opinion that mother and father are called only the native ones or possible adoptive parents. I hadn't even thought about what I would call her. I just didn't use references in the conversation. And this woman of mine is pushing and pushing twice - now what will you call me, mother, will you tell me and so on. At first I started to dodge, but then I recovered and talked to my husband, because they have a closer relationship, to explain to her that I am not a slave to such traditions and I can only call my mother my mother. She no longer raised the subject. I don't know why this whole exercise was, I can't understand what they put into it. There are 2 daughters besides my husband who would call her that ... Anyway, I wanted to note that I finally solved the problem with the address when I gave birth - from that moment on I kissed her in front of the child: ))) Baba Vili this, Baba Vili that, but the woman likes it, this is her first grandchild anyway. That's how my mother and I baboon her - they are both really happy.
What about your mother-in-law? Don't you have a mother, don't you have a surname, so you will take the strangers! As is Willy, so is Willy. Clean work. They are very impudent, but we women are ducks too, that we agree with these perversions.