Hi, I don't know how to start, but of course the title. I have a friend of 5 years, I know that it seems strange to you to be with someone for 5 years and not trust him, but it happens sometimes. The truth is that at first he lied to me about small things and I concluded that I did not trust him very much. I forgave him, I tried to forget about this little thing, everything was going well, but after 2 years he lied to me again for something like that. And from then until today I doubt his words. There was a time when I forgot about everything and we were happy, but until recently I stopped trusting him again. Just for no reason. I didn't believe where he was, if someone called him I didn't believe he was the person who said, I checked his phone (I know it's a stupid thing to do, but I felt he was lying to me and I wanted to know, otherwise I would live in delusion) . We quarreled very fiercely over my distrust of him, I told him I didn't trust him because he had lied to me before about small things, but lies are lies.
We got along because, despite everything, there is still thrill and love between us. But now one thing is bothering me and I feel like I need help. He didn't give me reason to doubt him, but I still don't believe him. I feel that there is something and I do not know what it is, there is nothing different in it to doubt, but I have a strange feeling. I don't know if it's paranoia anymore ... I want to be with him for many more years, but how can it happen when I constantly doubt him. I know that a relationship without trust does not work, but I do not believe it and it is. I torture him and myself. I'm sad, I want to believe him, but something stops me. If I leave him, I will die of grief, and when I am with him, I die internally again. I'm in a hole and there's no way out. Please advice, I am very sad ... because he lied to me before about small things, but lies are lies. We got along because, despite everything, there is still thrill and love between us. But now one thing is bothering me and I feel like I need help. He didn't give me reason to doubt him, but I still don't believe him. I feel that there is something and I do not know what it is, there is nothing different in it to doubt, but I have a strange feeling. I don't know if he's paranoid anymore ... I want to be with him for many more years, but how can it happen when I constantly doubt him. I know that a relationship without trust does not work, but I do not believe it and it is. I torture him and myself. I'm sad, I want to believe him, but something stops me.
If I leave him, I will die of grief, and when I am with him, I die internally again. I'm in a hole and there's no way out. Please advice, I am very sad ... because he lied to me before about small things, but lies are lies. We got along because, despite everything, there is still thrill and love between us. But now one thing is bothering me and I feel like I need help. He didn't give me reason to doubt him, but I still don't believe him. I feel that there is something and I do not know what it is, there is nothing different in it to doubt, but I have a strange feeling. I don't know if he's paranoid anymore ... I want to be with him for many more years, but how can it happen when I constantly doubt him. I know that a relationship without trust does not work, but I do not believe and it is. I torture him and myself. I'm sad, I want to believe him, but something stops me. If I leave him, I will die of grief, and when I am with him, I die internally again. I'm in a hole and there's no way out. Please advice, I am very sad ... We got along because, despite everything, there is still thrill and love between us.
But now one thing is bothering me and I feel like I need help. He didn't give me reason to doubt him, but I still don't believe him. I feel that there is something and I do not know what it is, there is nothing different in it to doubt, but I have a strange feeling. I don't know if he's paranoid anymore ... I want to be with him for many more years, but how can it happen when I constantly doubt him. I know that a relationship without trust does not work, but I do not believe it and it is. I torture him and myself. I'm sad, I want to believe him, but something stops me. If I leave him, I will die of grief, and when I am with him, I die internally again. I'm in a hole and there's no way out. Please advice, I am very sad ... We got along because, despite everything, there is still thrill and love between us. But now one thing is bothering me and I feel like I need help. He didn't give me reason to doubt him, but I still don't believe him. I feel that there is something and I do not know what it is, there is nothing different in it to doubt, but I have a strange feeling. I don't know if he's paranoid anymore ... I want to be with him for many more years, but how can it happen when I constantly doubt him. I know that a relationship without trust does not work, but I do not believe and it is. I torture him and myself. I'm sad, I want to believe him, but something stops me. If I leave him, I will die of grief, and when I am with him, I die internally again. I'm in a hole and there's no way out. Please advice, I am very sad ... that I need help. He didn't give me reason to doubt him, but I still don't believe him. I feel that there is something and I do not know what it is, there is nothing different in it to doubt, but I have a strange feeling. I don't know if he's paranoid anymore ... I want to be with him for many more years, but how can it happen when I constantly doubt him. I know that a relationship without trust does not work, but I do not believe and it is. I torture him and myself. I'm sad, I want to believe him, but something stops me. If I leave him, I will die of grief, and when I am with him, I die internally again. I'm in a hole and there's no way out. Please advice, I am very sad ... that I need help. He didn't give me reason to doubt him, but I still don't believe him. I feel that there is something and I do not know what it is, there is nothing different in it to doubt, but I have a strange feeling.
I don't know if it's paranoia anymore ... I want to be with him for many more years, but how can it happen when I constantly doubt him. I know that a relationship without trust does not work, but I do not believe and it is. I torture him and myself. I'm sad, I want to believe him, but something stops me. If I leave him, I will die of grief, and when I am with him, I die internally again. I'm in a hole and there's no way out. Please advice, I am very sad ... I want to be with him for many more years, but how can it happen when I constantly doubt him. I know that a relationship without trust does not work, but I do not believe and it is. I torture him and myself. I'm sad, I want to believe him, but something stops me. If I leave him, I will die of grief, and when I am with him, I die internally again. I'm in a hole and there's no way out. Please advice, I am very sad ... I want to be with him for many more years, but how can it happen when I constantly doubt him. I know that a relationship without trust does not work, but I do not believe and it is. I torture him and myself. I'm sad, I want to believe him, but something stops me. If I leave him, I will die of grief, and when I am with him, I die internally again. I'm in a hole and there's no way out. Please advice, I am very sad ...
Answers 18
The female instinct never lies! If in doubt, then there is a reason!
Female intuition never confuses. Events are in the air, even if they are not visible. Small small scars that are insignificant, but then it turns out differently.
You don't trust him right. Once he lied to you, he will do it again. It could be for small things, I'm not saying it's serious.
Author: I know there is something, but unfortunately I can't figure out what. There is simply no way and I am tormented ...
I don't think it matters anymore if he's lying, hiding something, etc. The point is, trust is gone and you're both tormented. Your doubts will not disappear, on the contrary. It's time for a frank conversation between you, but really frank, to the end. I'm not optimistic about the future of your relationship, sorry, darling. Ž
I would say that men have similar feelings and are very rarely wrong. He's lying to you about something, you don't know what. Probably another woman, nothing that is "in love" with you. You are safe for his family and wife, the other for entertainment. Get rid of it - once a person is used to lying, he will not change.
99% of men lie to their "halves" about small things. Usually the reason is that women never bother to accept them as such and react hysterically, especially to the fact that they are not the center of the world for their husbands. And no normal person wants to be fooled for nonsense. Of course, it is important to clarify what these "small" things are. For example, I have several acquaintances who invent a "necessary job" so that they can indulge in their hobby on a weekend. And they have to do it because if they say it in plain text, there are at least a few days of lamentation after how he did not care for her and did not love her because he did not want to spend time with her. No matter that she doesn't share this hobby, for example, and if she goes with him, she will be "dumb" all day and will grumble. That is. - I want to spend time together, but if we do what I want. So it would not be bad to first clarify what the situation is, because in many cases there should be no mistrust, but to be happy that you are tolerated at all. Now, if "trifle" is not a trifle, it is a separate issue.
What do you doubt? That there is another? Follow him and find out.
When there is a change in habits, daily life, etc., then something has happened. She may not be another woman, but she may simply not be on the same page with you. In general, I have strange long relationships, they run out. And there must be something to support the interest. is to make good things happen. He can do things that he hides from you. Have trouble he doesn't want to share. Gambling? Traces remain, especially with new technologies.
author, I think you can not build a relationship, let alone a family with this distrust of each other. I know it's hard, but it's best for both of you to split up. At least if you separate, you will not ruin a person's future life. If you really love him, let him be happy with another, things obviously don't work out with you. Don't be selfish, but think a little about the lives of the people you say you love
To numbers 1 and 2. Female intuition never confuses, but for some it is not intuition, but outright panic and stupidity. Of such "intuitive" ladies, I would run with three hundred, before their intuition had sharpened my last remaining nerves. And they will say, "if you see, intuition did not let me down, this one left, it turned out (what are you)".
Some women are swindlers - as the man escapes - he is guilty, when the woman escapes - again the man is guilty. So who is crazy to tolerate them like that?
Author: When we quarreled violently, he even cried and swore to me that there was no other. He thinks I don't trust him because I think there is another. No, I don't trust him because he lied to me about small things and all his friends cheat on their halves, and that's how a question arises in me - Is he like them? But he is too different from them. I don't think there's anyone else right now, but that he can do the same to me. There is nothing changed in his character, but there are thousands of paranoid questions in me. I want to continue our relationship, as he did. We had been apart for a week before and we were going crazy. I don't think I'm ready to end, I rather want to stop doubting and move on. I'm too jealous, and there are a lot of women who like him, I like men too, and I'm crazy about that.
Author: I don't believe there is another in that he even cried and said he was sorry for his lies before, he was honest, not that I didn't think so. But I hope that even one day I will find out, and not live in a lie and doubt as I do now.
By 13- As far as I know, men love to control. If a woman lies to them, even for trifles, they will literally go crazy. And just like women, they start coming back, "but now that she's lying to me about this, isn't she lying to me about something else?" And most of all "how does she allow ME to lie" With a lie the trust disappears. And it is not a question of how small and large it is, but this is a characteristic feature of the person in question. is to babble you every time you don't take him out. If you see that someone is lying and cheating on others, be sure that they will lie to you at the first need. Whether it's your friend, husband, wife, brother, etc. There are people who lie as they blink their eyelids - there is a neighboring topic. I call them "run-lies". For me, it is absolutely pointless to communicate with such people, so let them find someone else to lie to. I claim from great experience, that lies are felt in absolutely small and insignificant scars. Which, however, attract attention. This is exactly the intuition - that nothing special happened, but you know something is wrong. For example, many people, as they fuck, become very kind, caring, overly talkative, kind, helpful. Until, at some point, it became clear that they were hiding. And yes, indeed, in this case it no longer matters whether he is lying to her or not - their relationship is already poisoned and if he wants to walk on her hands she will not get better. And if she wants, let her stay with him to love him. Until, at some point, it became clear that they were hiding. And yes, indeed, in this case it no longer matters whether he is lying to her or not - their relationship is already poisoned and if he wants to walk on her hands she will not get better. And if she wants, let her stay with him to love him. Until, at some point, it became clear that they were hiding. And yes, indeed, in this case it no longer matters whether he is lying to her or not - their relationship is already poisoned and if he wants to walk on her hands it will not get better. And if she wants, let her stay with him to love him.
That's why I have a girlfriend who doesn't read in forums or magazines ... Our lives are devoid of any such dramas.
Author, try to rationalize your doubts. For example, if he is different from his friends, he may not really be cheating. But your doubts remain. Talk to him about your infidelity, maybe it will shed light on why you feel that way. Look for all such things that make you feel fear / doubt and think about the real root cause. Then discuss them. Little by little, you can clear up your relationship or gain a greater understanding of your friend's nature. Open communication is key to your relationship, and even the smallest details can be important.
Because of this feminine intuition, such films can be rotated, as No. 13 says, not directly. I would also run away from such a woman very quickly, even if she is a model in appearance. However, we do not know what is meant by a lying lie, he may have lied, for example, what he ate at lunch, when he went to bed, how much his new phone costs and the like. Such behavior of the author reminds me more of some psychological or even mental problem (I say it in good faith) such as obsessions or OCD. The author sought help from a psychologist and do not spoil your relationship for nonsense. The boy is holding on to you as long as he hasn't blown away with all these problems. Apparently you don't have much experience and you don't know what the person you are with is lying right in your eyes about almost everything he tells you. Then it really hurts ....