Hi, I know there are many similar topics about this. But in this topic, to make it easier for you to help me and give advice, I will try to build you a psycho profile of my partner to make it easier for you to guess why he is behaving this way. I am a 21-year-old boy, my girlfriend, who is 19, and I have been together for a year. My girlfriend is a virgin. I've never pressured her to do anything because I know perfectly well that for some girls it's a big step. My problem is not that we don't have sex. And that she lacks total desire and I'm starting to get complex. I touched her, I made French love a few times, apparently she liked it a lot, it got very wet, even too much. But that was a few months ago, and since then she has refused to do anything with her at all, or anything else. And I'm starting to think that I am not attracted to her. I want to talk to her about it, but when she started, she got angry and said she refused to talk about it and that she was just worried and the problem wasn't with me. I tend to believe her if there hadn't been any differences between us a few months ago, namely. We broke up, we argued about stupidity and goodbye, she told me that I had not attracted her sexually enough. Anyway, time passed and we got together again, and those words were the first thing I wanted to talk to her about. She told me that she said it because she was angry and didn't think about it, and that if she really thought about it, why should she reunite with me. From this moment on our reunion, there is no total desire for any caresses. There are 3 main excuses. 1st I'm tired and super tense and stressed I want to rest. 2nd I have not shaved and I am uncomfortable.
3rd I'm in a cycle. Since the 3rd month, she is eternally tired, there is no time to shave, and when these factors are gone, she is in a cycle. Believe me, I wholeheartedly want to believe her, but I can't. Let me share facts about her and her life that can help you build an idea of what kind of character she is, and whether these excuses are really bearable. For starters, she is a huge stubborn person and a person who thinks mainly about himself, over time has changed little in this regard. There are constant family problems, theirs are super nervous people and from the very least they make a problem and scold constantly. Her job is not very good, but she finds it very difficult because she works at night and sleeps during the day and is constantly sleepy, tired and nervous, the people she works with are also not flowers and also cause a lot of stress. And most importantly, she is very influenced by her parents, who watched her super sloppy but at the same time super stressful. 2, 3 times when she is tired, I start to touch her and massage her intimately to kiss her and I see that she just turns her eyes and says that she is super good and it works when she is tired, and at the same time it happens once in the month. I want to try to understand her. And I avoid the fact that the problem is in me, the sense that I don't attract it. Because if I emphasize this fact, I have to part with it. What matters to me is not sex, but the desire for it. And another thing, I see her that with her friends, sometimes when it comes to sex or some joke related to it, she is quite active and it's quite interesting, and at the same time she doesn't treat me like that when it comes to something like that. changes the subject and doesn't want to hear it at all, when I started talking about it, she gets angry and says she is not being talked to. I thought she was lying to me that she was a virgin, but several times I touched her insolently and she jumped all over and it was obvious that she was in a lot of pain. Pain is also something I understand that she may be afraid of. But she doesn't even want to touch me or fellatio. She touched me 2, 3 times as only one of them, she put her hand there without pushing it and I was fascinated. The whole problem is that I want to believe that those words about sexual attraction she really didn't mean. I will be glad to hear your opinion and advice :) 3 times as only one of them, I put my hand there myself without pushing it and I was absolutely fascinated. The whole problem is that I want to believe that those words about sexual attraction she really didn't mean. I will be glad to hear your opinion and advice :) 3 times as only one of them, I put my hand there myself without pushing it and I was absolutely fascinated. The whole problem is that I want to believe that those words about sexual attraction she really didn't mean. I will be glad to hear your opinion and advice :)
Answers 29
Have you been with a virgin? The fact that she jumps is not an indication that she is in pain, she may want to hide that she is not a virgin. Try to penetrate with 1 finger, if it enters without a problem - it is not a virgin. If you penetrate her with 1 finger and feel a barrier that you can no longer - she is a virgin. For a girl with no experience it is strange to tell you that you do not attract her sexually, as real naked men have not seen or erect penises.
You write a lot, boy, but let me ask you, where are you sure she's a virgin? and just say dumb that you are sure of that please :) women are dangerous work and we can turn naive men on the little finger. For me, she has someone else who arouses her more than you, it is not normal that she does not want sex or intimacy from her boyfriend and is 19 !! now you need a volcano of passions and desires. check both phone and facebook and mail if you can very delicately I'm sure you will find big surprises.
I am also a man, Sorry buddy, But my personal opinion is the following,. (Which you don't have to consider.) First, this girl, She doesn't love you, She can't be with a girl, and she can't even touch you in intimate parts. Second. I doubt she's a virgin, so she doesn't give it to you. Third. If it is influenced by your family, why don't you ask yourself - The next question - After a while, if she decides, she will give you children and children will be born to you tomorrow. . I understand you're madly in love with this one, but she doesn't deserve you. In my opinion, leave it while it's time, find a girl who loves you, loves you, and gradually, you will have sexual intercourse, and you will create a healthy and stable family. But right now with this girl where you are, even if you persuade her to have sex and have children. I think only you will suffer from all the work, and one day the children will suffer if divorces follow. She is now 19 years old. There is no desire for sex, and to become 40 years old. You will probably sleep in separate beds. The decision is yours, but if I am in your place, I abandon her and within a month I will find a good and decent girl, whose love will be mutual.
Don't waste your time, find a decent girl!
To comment 2. You say 'we women', then you write in the masculine 'I'm sure'. Lastly ... what are you? Woman or man. Let's say you're a woman, it's more convenient for me to catch you for the following. For naive men ... who you can turn on your little finger. I want to distract you a little, because you are obviously one of the women who spin the men ... that someone plays your whistle is not always naive, but is in love and people who are really in love would do more for the other than for themselves . From there comes your misunderstanding of this, from there comes the fact that men who don't play your whistle attract you more, and from there comes the fact that you remain the men who are ready for anything for you (your naive ) for people who are not so devoted to you and there is already the key to unsuccessful relationships in which most women get into and then roar, that men are not. The other is that if you are turned on your little finger, roar that you can even be heard in space. So far with the aversion to you and women like you. It just doesn't bother me that you have a husband, children, you're happy and so on. I'm absolutely sure that even if you have them physically ... on an emotional level (if you have a deep thought, not a superficial one), but you hardly have such a thought, you're probably just mistaken, so ... it's barely do you have something real. A person who thinks this way ... there is nothing real like love. Point and fact :) Yeah .... for the little man above, I'm sorry, but number 2 teased me a little. For you in a nutshell ... beat your whip, you're still young. You will recover in a few months. Stop thinking about her. This person is definitely not for you. Virgin, childless ... it doesn't matter. There is no way there is nothing sexual for so long. You endured a lot again and no, it's not because of the sex itself, but as some people know ... sex, especially the emotional one - brings people together and makes them feel open to each other. They share more, in general things are quite different. The sacrifice was not worth it, and he said nothing about himself. What are you, what are you? Work, what do you do and tnt. Some of you may be interested, even if you live for free, so as not to give money. As funny as it sounds ... there are some. In this world you should not be surprised by anything. Everything happens, even the unthinkable. This is from me in a nutshell. A young man with a lot of life and bitter experience. Realistic and firmly on the ground. M on 31 - Burgas. in general, things are quite different. The sacrifice was not worth it, and he said nothing about himself. What are you, what are you? Work, what do you do and tnt. Some of you may be interested, even if you live for free, so as not to give money. As funny as it sounds ... there are some. In this world you should not be surprised by anything. Everything happens, even the unthinkable. This is from me in a nutshell. A young man with a lot of life and bitter experience. Realistic and firmly on the ground. M on 31 - Burgas. in general, things are quite different. The sacrifice was not worth it, and he said nothing about himself. What are you, what are you? Work, what do you do and tnt. Some of you may be interested, even if you live for free, so as not to give money. As funny as it sounds ... there are some. In this world you should not be surprised by anything. Everything happens, even the unthinkable. This is from me in a nutshell. A young man with a lot of life and bitter experience. Realistic and firmly on the ground. M on 31 - Burgas. This is from me in a nutshell. A young man with a lot of life and bitter experience. Realistic and firmly on the ground. M on 31 - Burgas. This is from me in a nutshell. A young man with a lot of life and bitter experience. Realistic and firmly on the ground. M on 31 - Burgas.
Some women are so unconscious that I am ashamed of their behavior. I have quarreled dozens of times with my partners, but I have never, even in my greatest anger, and I would not say that I am not sexually attracted, because in the end, when I am with this man, it is assumed that I like him anyway. I wouldn't say it just to hurt him, because such words would deal such a blow to the ego of almost every man, and to the more sensitive to leave a complex. When I was a virgin, along with fear and anxiety, I had a great desire to go further with the man I was with then. However, entering into such a relationship, it is assumed that you like this person, and what could be more natural between two people who like each other, except to become intimate at some point. Not to mention that you are almost at the beginning of your relationship. Usually passion, desire, etc. are strongest just then. I guess it's exhausting to work at night, but she's not the only woman who works like that. And if there is a desire, it can be in 10 minutes, but she will pay attention to the person next to her. In my opinion, there is something that you (respectively we) do not know, but what and for what purpose it is hidden ...
Brother. Women of this type do not want you to touch lightly, but to grind their plums roughly and to the point of recoil! In the beginning you didn't break it when you should, and now you sit and wonder why it doesn't catch your cock. How can you catch him, dude? She's probably with you, either for money or for a screen.
There are such women. I had such a boyfriend just when I was 19-20. He was aroused, but he didn't want to penetrate. Now, almost 10 years later, she is 28 and dating a 55-year-old and explains to me that she has never had sex. She had sex with only one boy, and the 55-year-old did not arouse her, but she liked him very much as a person. Like your girlfriend, mine was from a super spoiled but stressful family. She says she does not know the reason for her behavior. Because I love psychology, I read that the fear of penetration is a manifestation typical of the complex of Electra and rigid characters. She is just such a character - as a little girl, a very exemplary perfectionist. Such people somehow unknowingly associate sexual pleasure with something that is taboo and because they are "perfect." they cannot break the taboo (which is unrealistic). That is, everything starts from childhood ... I will tell you what I would do in a situation like yours, but from my point of view as a 30-year-old. Since I couldn't be in a relationship and not have sex (what's the point of such a relationship just to make me angry and dissatisfied?), I would be a little more "rude", say. I wouldn't really rape her, but I would definitely go to undress her no matter how much she pulls, then I would penetrate with my finger and when I feel that she is well moistened, I will put it on her. Another option would be to just tell her that such a non-sexual relationship doesn't suit me and dump her. Better a poor horse than no horse at all. And besides the fact that she told you that you are unwanted to be this one, women think one thing, talk the second time, do the third ... She probably tried to burn you,
She's frigid. You don't need her. They get worse.
That relationship is probably gone, I'm telling you from experience. Even if there is no other, it appeared because she is not with you as a partner. You are like a brother and sister.
You've slept a lot, boy ... But there's time - life will open your eyes one way or another.
You don't turn her on. You have to separate. There is no sexual attraction.
Beat her jester and find another. Life is too short to waste it with some delusions.
At least if you pay half the rent - you are roommates!
So since you feel unwanted, what else do you do in this 'relationship'?
I am the author. I'm a virgin, I tried to penetrate with my finger and there was a barrier (God knows how stupid it sounds) And secondly, there is hardly another, we work in one place and we are non-stop together, we sleep together, to all the profiles on social networks, I did not and wanted them she gave them to me.
This girl is super weird. Either she's not a virgin or she's asexual, I think it's the latter ... What are you with her for ... I'm 19 too and I recently lost my virginity, but I don't think the whole thing comes from being "afraid" "or something .. Abnormal work: D
In my opinion, she has a problem with sexuality and her parents are to blame. If she was told that sex was a bad or shameful thing, she would never have a normal sexual relationship. The problem is not in you, sorry for the girl, and you found a normal girl. You look decent, good luck, boy!
What you have is not a real relationship. If it is frigid it will not get better. It seems to me like a comfortable waiting on her part for a better partner. I wouldn't waste my time in your place.
As a girl, I will try to give you some advice. If you really want to be with her, for example, try to take her somewhere, for example to the cinema, dinner, disco, it depends on what she likes and where she goes. Diversify. Massage her back, arms, shoulders, for example, do not touch her intimately. Make her relax physically and mentally, massage is a great way, for me, for example, it always works. She works on her own appearance, if you don't feel safe, for example clothes, train, put on perfumes ... but if these things don't work anymore, then you don't attract her and I don't see any sense in harassing her ...
People who have told you that the relationship is bye are right. At that age for so long .. but I wonder if she didn't cheat on you and now she can't hide it, because you think she's a virgin ..
To go to a monastery. Why torture good guys like you. In general, your girl is behaving very strangely, when I was a virgin at 19, it never occurred to me to grab my friend's tool, let alone let him lick me, I was worried about what came next. Somehow it doesn't seem adequate to me that she thinks it's fair to let you get hot and leave the emotion in half. I think she knows she's making a fool of you. To find someone impotent, don't you know what relationships are for, to support each other, to have fun, to love each other, to be intimate, that is, to have sex sooner or later. Not only children's stories and butterflies, you also need good sex!
There are only two dude options;). Both are not good. The first is that he makes you a total idiot and fucks another under your nose, which I believe 95%. The second option is that you do not arouse her enough because you are too gentle and careful. Dude women love tenderness and being considerate, but at times. If you are constantly kissing and touching, he will only consider you a pendarka or a friend and will not look at you with such eyes. I understand, you love her, you want her, but you are a very bad brother too. You haven't fucked her in a year? !! Well, if I were your boyfriend, I would be funny and even sorry. The first case is very nasty and has happened to me several times, but I came out of it with dignity and courage. All from serious relationships. The second one has never happened to me because I am like that by nature. I don't delay them at all and they feel it. 1, 2 meetings, come on 3 and are already in bed. From experience I tell you that they also know that it will happen the second, third time and if you do not do it they put in the column - female and complex type. If you don't win the woman and don't like you in the beginning, you are a runaway friend. And you already have a girl for a year and you stay like that. I advise you to become a MAN, change your tactics, take her out to dinner, give her something or flowers, compliment her, excite her first with your mind and then just catch her and fuck her like people. Even if you rebel, show character and don't give up easily. If even then he pushes you, pack your bags without explanation and say goodbye and leave. Believe me, this will shock her. Don't pick up her wire, don't call her. Women want thrill and drama, bro. If you do not receive your dose VERY quickly you become bored and predictable, and this kills the desire for sex. I tell you from experience. And if he doesn't look for you, I advise you to go with friends or alone to the bar or the disco the same evening and catch a cool babe and fix it. You'll see how fast you get along with this virgin, haha. Good luck
The comments here are always split, so ignore them. Otherwise, as you say, maybe she's really worried and more stressed at work, etc. I think it's nice to have a more serious conversation with her and share all your worries. After all, she's with you, so you're obviously attracted to her in some way.
As a woman, I guess there are two options. Either she doesn't want you enough, or she has a problem, something may have traumatized her psyche. If it's the latter, he has to sit down and tell you, you can't guess. And if so, help her overcome the problem. However, from what you have said, I see that you predispose and arouse her well enough ... But if a man doesn't attract me, I wouldn't let him lick me ... I think just sit down and ask her, press her a little, if necessary to tell you where the problem is. It is not normal at 19 to have no desire.
You are a good boy and you are obvious, and this one has caught you! As a woman I tell you this girl, there is a big problem! She is active with girls on sexual topics, have you ever thought that she could be a LESBIAN? But she hides it and she caught you by the screen. How long have you been with her? It's not normal for a 19-year-old to treat you like that. In my opinion, leave this girl, it is clear that there is a problem that the finger does not move to solve! If the problem is the job, let her change it, if there are problem parents, take her to live with you. Let's see what excuses he will find .... Seek the truth, do not waste your time and youth with this one. There are people all their lives who are ashamed and hide their real sexuality and catch their partners as screens. It's very sad very much ... check out the chats with the girls IF you can you can read some surprise ... :) Paris.
And what's wrong with frigidity? The desire for sex is a great weakness that makes us monkeys and a half. Sex fucks our nth degree mother, paragraph. Undeniable fact!
Like others, I think there is something hidden. Several options come to mind: 1. She is ashamed of her body. But given that you did French for her without a problem, it's unlikely. But you may be worried about another part of your body, your chest or something else. 2. She wants to remain a virgin. It may sound crazy to some people in the 21st century, but there are girls who have been told (most often from an early age) that they must remain virgins until their wedding. Even in my opinion, this is a very likely scenario in your case. 3. She is afraid, ashamed, or has some other complex or phobia of intimacy. But again, the fact that you came to French makes me doubt it. If she was happy, then she has sexual desire. It's just that some other barrier doesn't allow her to get to the end. I think he's talking to her seriously about this.
Drop it as soon as possible! You will only struggle with it to know. Nothing good awaits you if you still tolerate it.