I Left Him Because He Is Addicted To Porn

Dear readers, I would like to share my story with you, because I know that I am not the only one and because it cost me a lot of effort and struggle to leave the man I love because of his passion for pornography. I will be as brief as possible.

We were together for about 5 years. In the first weeks of our relationship, I began to feel that something was wrong, but, I admit, I was blindly in love and did not pay much attention. It started to get unbearable when the "pink period" passed and we started looking at each other more soberly. Initially, it was the constant staring at random girls. Not just to look for a second or two, but to stare while I'm next to him. He rarely commented in front of me, but if we were in the company of his friends, he always found an occasion to mention some "pussy" or talk about "cool chicks", etc. I could see him getting excited, talking louder and louder with enthusiasm. The others were embarrassed, I had never heard such words and statements from his friends, even if they were without their halves. Needless to say, how I felt.

I had no idea how bad the porn situation was until a time came when we had to use a shared computer. It became clear from the story that he watched at least twice a day. Search for "beautiful porn actresses" in specialized topics, browse, choose, etc. There are folders full of women - models, actresses, art photographs, all kinds. View topics with nude photos, etc. He shows an increased interest in women who are artists, musicians, writers, and so on. At the university, almost all of his term papers and other work were related to female authors, whom I suspect he chose in appearance. Judging by the way he wrote and talked about them, he mentioned their naked bodies, their hair, and nonsense that had nothing to do with scientific work. I've also seen conversations with his friends that say, "Don't tell anyone, but I have a weakness for some women."

The icing on the cake was sex. It didn't work for him, he couldn't finish, he fell, which he told me to turn away until he "looked at something" on his phone. He told me that he often thought about the porn he watched while we had sex to get aroused. No sense in telling you now - I don't wanna ruin the surprise.
I decided to start behaving the same way - looking at men, talking about how cool he was and how funny he was. Ha, guess what! "Don't you like me anymore ?! Will you leave me now?" etc. There was grumbling, complaining. Hypocritical, isn't it?

I prayed, tried, raised scandals, cried, but to no avail. It had nothing to do with me, it's none of my business. I was driven crazy, complex, filmmaker, everything was denied, it wasn't true ... I must be blind and stupid. Emmy, I'm tired of trampling on my self-esteem and love. I understand it was sometimes, but it's too much and had a huge effect on the normalcy of our relationship. I refused him sex only during a cycle, I started drinking contraceptives to make him even better. No and no. To sit with his hand in his pants then, I hope he is satisfied.

Ladies, I want you to know that the problem is not in you - you are not ugly, you are not crazy, you have the right to feel rejected and unwanted if you are not one of those who always have a "headache". Don't let them blackmail you with words like, "Better that than cheating on you." Understand that if there was no porn, they would immediately go abroad. Don't let them shift the blame and explain how this is normal, just because all the ads, spies, videos, etc. revolve around nudity.

If you are interested, you can read this article and the comments below it. Even the most innocuous thing becomes a problem when it is abused.