Hello, I do not write often in this forum to say almost never, but I really like it, I think it is quite useful for people in general and it is wonderful that we help each other on certain issues. I will be very grateful if the admins publish my story. I'm a 19-year-old girl, when I was 18 I found out that I was adopted by my mother, my adoptive mother happened in a slightly rude way, but I didn't take it seriously, I was just shocked because it's been 18 years since they told me. After my shock passed, I talked to my mother and she told me that she did not know why my mother had abandoned me or where she was, but she knew that I had a brother and a sister and she did not know anything about my father. Then I really hated them because they left me, but now after a while I would just like ... to know, I want to know who I am and where I come from and the only way is to talk to my mother I understood, that without her I could not find my mother because it was illegal for the court to provide me with my real birth certificate unless the adoptive parent agreed with pure security it was created that everything was kept secret. Now you will wonder why I just don't ask her but I can't or more precisely I don't know how .. I don't want to hurt her or to think that I want to be with them there is no such thing .. so my question is how to find out, how to ask her and is there a way without asking her thanks in advance :) Regards.
Answers 5
I wonder why every adoptee wants to find his mother with the only reason to talk about why he was abandoned? Isn't it clear to everyone in this world why mothers abandon their children? There are two reasons, either a lack of money or a lack of understanding on the part of a young mother's parents. However, if you know that you have an abandoned brother and sister, then the reason for your abandonment is lack of money. I also don't understand why you expect the adoptive mother to tell you why you are abandoned or where your mother is, do you think that the adoptive parents when they adopt are aware of who the biological parent is and what is the reason for the abandonment? And even if you find your biological mother, do you think she will tell you another for an acceptable reason for abandoning three children? Do not seek advice, but accept the adoptive mother as a mother, she is a person who has given 18 years of her life to be so healthy, smart and good today.
Your real mother is the one who raised you, the other just gave birth to you. There is such a "policy" to keep everything secret precisely so that children do not reunite with old families when others have grown up.
This is the greatest human stupidity, to hide the true origin of a child! Sooner or later, he will learn that he has been adopted, why should the truth be hidden? It would be best if, on his 18th birthday, he was given the complete file, to know his true origin. That way, his parents won't have to wonder how to tell him he's adopted. At this age the child becomes independent and the parents are no longer indebted to him. Recently, a gypsy girl was adopted on television, adopted in Italy, but returned to live in the gypsy ghetto with her real family. Blood is not water, destiny is encoded in our soul. If the author does not learn the truth, what will happen if she accidentally falls in love with her brother, whom she does not know now? Then we wonder why there are abnormalities in newborns. As painful as it is, the truth must be known!
Dear author, you are not the only one - many adopted children are like you ... The important thing is that your adoptive parents have looked after you and loved you - that is, they are your real parents. When I have a family, I will gladly adopt a child! But really - a child of 13 years or older must have long ago understood if he was adopted. But obviously your parents had a hard time. What do you know about your brother and sister? Remember that your parents love you, even if you are not with their blood! One girl
My mind doesn't understand why the adopters are hiding. Just days ago, my 38-year-old husband found out he was adopted. I had suspicions for a long time and finally unexpectedly pressed my mother-in-law and she, after roaring an ocean of tears (I still wonder why!), Finally confirmed. I had suspicions because my husband is tall and dark-skinned, while his two younger brothers, as well as his mother and father, are short and blond. He is extremely smart and sociable, while his family as a whole is of average intelligence and finds it difficult to get along with people. I also noticed habits that no one had ever instilled in him. For example, he loves classical music, which has never been heard in his family. He also has a special innate delicacy, I would even describe it as aristocracy, which sharply distinguishes him from the environment in which he grew up, and by the Balkan man as a type. So, after I hugged his mother, it turned out that his biological father was an Arab student and his birth mother was a student. I can't dig anymore. My husband reacted completely calmly. He said, "I've actually always felt different, I suspected you couldn't be my biological parents, but I love you and I have no desire to rummage through my pedigree." But why they hid the truth from an old man for so long, I have no explanation. As for digging in the genealogy, there is no way without his desire, but I want to know where his roots come from. At least let's go on a trip there, see the culture whose genes it carries. I can't dig anymore. My husband reacted completely calmly. He said, "I've actually always felt different, I suspected you couldn't be my biological parents, but I love you and I have no desire to rummage through my pedigree." But why they hid the truth from an old man for so long, I have no explanation. As for digging in the genealogy, there is no way without his desire, but I want to know where his roots come from. At least let's go on a trip there, see the culture whose genes it carries. I can't dig anymore. My husband reacted completely calmly. He said, "I've actually always felt different, I suspected you couldn't be my biological parents, but I love you and I have no desire to rummage through my pedigree." But why they hid the truth from an old man for so long, I have no explanation. As for digging in the genealogy, there is no way without his desire, but I want to know where his roots come from. At least let's go on a trip there, see the culture whose genes it carries. As for digging in the pedigree, there is no way to do without his desire, but I want to know where his roots come from. At least let's go on a trip there, see the culture whose genes it carries. As for digging into the genealogy, there is no way to do without his desire, but I want to know where his roots come from. At least let's go on a trip there, see the culture whose genes it carries.