My story is so trivial that you may find it boring, but still - please advice! I lead a very boring life - we don't go anywhere, we don't do anything interesting, it depresses me terribly. In addition, my daily life is terribly busy - from 6.00 to 23.00 I can not sit down to rest because I work, study and go around with my family. I am so fascinated by all my duties that I no longer know which day we are and which season. I have become an absolute robot. I can't stand it! Not to mention how many years I haven't spent time with myself ... except for going to the hairdresser from time to time. I go crazy because I realize that I'm changing for the worse and I can't think of anything to do so that both the wolf is full and the lamb is whole. Understand wolf = my husband, lamb = ... well, it's clear that it's me.
I came to my word - if you think "my dear" I have some support, you are very wrong. I don't even want him to help me as much as he doesn't bother me. Yes but no. At first I didn't pay attention to his words, but they come to me more. It is a matter of constant humiliation and insults, seeking an account for everything. In words, the most liberal man in the world comes out, and I can't take one step, say one thing without asking for an explanation and being told how much I'm "lost" (I soften things up a lot because I'm uncomfortable) . Things get pretty rough when I happen to refuse to have sex. This is my other harassment - every third sentence of his tome is related to this ... Believe me, I'm already vomiting! So if someone decides to advise me to look for a lover, let him give up... The problems with him are not just that, but in the end, I will not list them, that I will bore you completely. I'm seriously thinking of leaving him. It won't be easy for me, but at least I'll get rid of his complexity, which ruins me mentally. Please share with me your personal experience - how were things with you when you started from the beginning? It will help me a lot to make a decision because I am really almost powerless due to physical and mental fatigue ...... and I am only 30 ....... Thanks in advance!
Answers 11
Hello! I am your age and I have already overcome this problem. If you want, contact me on my skype nikita_vn.
Well leave it! I give you an example with my mother. My parents are divorced and my mother had a hard time alone and she caught up with a guy who behaved perfectly at first, but later started asking her for an explanation for everything she goes, what she does and kill her for no reason. Eventually I had to intervene and even got into a fight after which he left. Your real man is as he is now, not as he was in the beginning.
If you accept having sex as harassment, then you are wrong in your family - you cannot refuse to do the most natural thing in this world and expect admiration, that you are engaged and have arranged your life so that you feel like a slave. is your concern and no one is to blame for your condition except yourself!Think about what your partner sees in you and how it works. was rude because you are rude to yourself first and you admit that you do not tolerate but you want someone else to tolerate you - you just need a vision and a new model of social behavior above all to turn your life upside down because it whines and reproaches to the other are not possible - you have to help yourself to build your independence and the necessary authority above all!
As I read, you are an upright and ambitious woman and you do not need a man like yours not only to humiliate you, but also to hinder you. With a little more courage and forward, she divorced. It's hard to be alone, but you're still young and you'll meet a more suitable man, believe me. And so slowly and painfully your soul will perish. I stayed with my ex because of the child, but he did not give him any upbringing with his example of drunkenness and rudeness. I got divorced when my son turned 17 and I'm sorry I didn't do it in the fifth year of our marriage. Now I'm 45, my son died in an accident and I don't see who will stop by me and want to share his life with me. So act while you are still young.
4 - Thank you for the shared experience, I will keep it in mind. Our child (6 years old) is the other problem in the situation. I don't know if I have the right to deprive him of his father, even though they have almost no common language - he is looking for me for everything. I was very sad because of what happened to your child ... But who says that life is fair ... 3 - I agree with you that sex is the most natural thing. But it also has a moment of satiety - if you eat your favorite cake 10 times a day for years, in the end you will not want to look at it. For me, things are like that. And one more thing I want to tell you - I'm not "self-enslaved" - I just want to develop. And here is the problem - HE does not want. And that prevents him ...
Honey, I've been trying for years to live with a man I can't stand anymore, everything in him irritates me, even his very presence. I felt incredibly guilty and looked for the reason in myself. Now that I look back, I even wonder how I survived. For me, people don't change, they just don't know each other well enough before they decide to start a family, and when they get to know each other, they get disappointed in each other and hate each other. My advice is to look for happiness, and it comes as long as you know what you are looking for. So whether it will be difficult for you, I don't know, I am a mother of two children and only when I left my husband I mobilized I reached heights and I felt really alive
I know what the situation is about! I'm in a similar situation! It is not easy at all, our time passes waiting for something to change, and change does not happen. I wish you luck and success in solving the dilemma!
You are a young, cultured and intelligent young lady who knows perfectly well what the problems are and how to solve them. You just need a little more determination. You will get it sooner or later. It remains to be decided whether to waste more time of your life or to pursue your happiness.
I am still 16 years old but I want to express an opinion. No matter how little experience I have :) with my family the situation is the same ... I will not go to explain but the right choice is to divorce your husband :) Good luck!
Author, I lived like that, I have 2 children. Sex was harassment because I no longer loved my husband. I was sick of all men. When I got divorced, I was alone for a long time. After about 4 years, I got tired of that too. I registered on a dating site and there I met him - the most wonderful man in the world! It's been great for 3 years now! And sex, too, and everything else.
NUMBER 10 DON'T YOU REMEMBER WHAT IT WAS LIKE THEN THAT IT DIDN'T HAPPEN TO ANYTHING.