I'm Pregnant, And I Don't Know If I'll Be Able To Have A Second Child

   Life rarely goes according to our plans. Enjoy the "miracle", the rest will only be sorted out. And if you really want to achieve something, it will happen with hard work and perseverance, even though it will be at a later stage. In addition, things may not develop as in your first pregnancy and go much easier. (And you already have experience and you know that difficult periods are over).

   I also have a child of the same age. When beshv at 6m. I got pregnant again, I didn't think it was a second time, I wasn't ready, but I didn't think about abortion, later I had a spontaneous one. Children grow up fast, if you always wanted a second one it came. I want more now. You also have help, can you swear in absentia or spend one semester and the next in a year? What do you study. In our country, most of the women who studied to be midwives were pregnant and studying.

   Not graduating doesn't make you a "simple woman." My mother has a university degree, but she had to become a housewife because I fell ill from an early age, and she had to stay in care of me until I could start on my own, eventually becoming a housewife. I never once thought she was a "simple woman." I don't feel "proud" of her, because I don't think that children can be "proud" of their parents, for example, my father is an airplane pilot, but that doesn't make me "proud" of him. What I feel for her is endless gratitude. Your son will not care if his mother has a successful career, only you will care. Of course, I'm not trying to dissuade you from developing professionally, but you probably know that the biological clock ticks like that. On top of that, you have problems with the fallopian tubes. You are right to think that you may not have another chance of pregnancy. You can complete your higher education at any age, but female fertility has an expiration date. After 3 years it will not be too late to realize professionally, but with your health problems, it may be too late for pregnancy. Even if you start your professional realization at the age of 40, you still have at least 20 years to realize yourself. After all, your problem is rooted in your psychology. You think that professional realization is a high value, but at the same time you want to have more children, but at the same time you want to achieve professional realization first. This is of course impossible. Even if there were no problems with the fallopian tubes, it would still be impossible. You are approaching 30, your fertility will begin to decline even more. You can start your professional realization later and start it 10 years later, it would still not be a problem, but no one is waiting for the biological clock. With your health problems, it may be impossible to get pregnant in 5 years. You have to decide for yourself whether you would like to start developing professionally from now on and not be able to have more children or to have children now and start developing your career later.

   1. About studying - don't think about it at all. This is a waste of time for most people. It's good to finish it, but it's by no means "more important." 2. It is better to give up the manger. It is not a good idea to send your child to some aunts when they are too young to talk or explain exactly what is happening during the day. So drive your pregnancy and don't worry. You will cope and then you will wonder what you thought so much. If you say you're having an abortion, then you're going to pull your hair out for a stupid idea.

   Girl, give birth to your child! The more children, the healthier the woman. And you will have a third, and you will rejoice in it, but in four or five years.

   I recently started making our family tree. At the level of grandparents and great-grandparents, people had 5-6-7 children! They probably reached 10, but 1-2 died for various reasons ... You are fooling around with the second, and you have no financial problems! Let me tell you - my sister gave birth to twins! They are already 8 years old, but do you think what happened to her, both during pregnancy and after the birth? I advise you not to worry about anything! Let the child grow calmly. Even without that, enough worries and worries await him during his life ...

   Well, sorry if you used a condom. Since you want to get your life in order, finish, etc., why do you have sex without a condom, even with your husband? Thinking in perspective is necessary, and you did not think So now you will give birth and look after another child, then you will graduate, etc. But before the 3rd comes, you better use a condom!

   Provided that you have absolutely no serious preconditions that are a total obstacle to the normal upbringing of a child, I advise you to put aside your torments and enjoy the blessing of becoming a mother again. A person learns all his life and as long as he is healthy he can build a career all his life. But motherhood can't be postponed when you want and wait for everything to be okay. Try to think only about the positives - children will have a small difference, your motherhood is fresh, you are not the first and last to learn while pregnant, and you have help from grandmothers, this is not to be underestimated. We are with one child for now and when I think about why we postpone the next one I get angry with myself. We tighten the apartment, I started a stable job that allows me to take sick leave and leave when I need to,

   I think you are an ambitious woman. Everything in small steps. Do not push yourself unnecessarily, but make real plans slowly. Put your little one in the crib and start with the last year. Go to lectures, exercises and take as many exams as possible. It is not the end of the world, the important thing is that you have a desire for development. I was 7 months pregnant at one of my state exams, and I took the other two at the remedial session. Good luck and congratulations! Don't rush and don't blame yourself. Everyone draws their own future, comparison with others should not be a disease. It is only constructive competition.

   Number 7, read before you pour out your anger on people. The author was told that she had blocked tubes and could not get pregnant. In this case, I don't think anyone with a permanent partner would use a condom. But you didn't read that far, did you? You're just looking for a place to pick.

   The Mother of God has blessed you, and you are grumbling. That there are many two children in one family? My son has been struggling for 5-6 years, but they are not, and you are happy - just rejoice. Yes, it is difficult with a small difference, but you have someone to help you. My children are 10 years apart and it was still not easy for me. I will share something with you personally - my son was 10 when I got pregnant for the second time. The video area was not used then as it is now, and because I was quite big, they said I would have twins. Then, like you, I roared, wow, 3 children, like the gypsies, how will I manage, how will I secure them. When they finally watched me on video, it turned out to be a baby. Then over the years I have regretted millions of times that there were not 2 or three. Now everything would be multiplied by 3 instead of 2. You're lucky, enjoy the best thing that happened to you.

   As I read, I cried because I didn't have all these LUXURIES. - Private nursery for the child. -You have someone to rely on to; - take a driving course - take a language course - study - just go on holiday together - when you have a commitment to have someone to leave or just start. What will you not be able to handle? You have SUPPORT to do all of the above, just open your worldview and trust the people who are ready to help you and are behind you. After my birth, I dragged myself, taking on everything from the first day, alone. I was constantly sick, dizzy, vomiting from helplessness and fatigue. I had no relatives to support me. I remember with horror elementary situations, such as buying 1 loaf of bread next to the store, asking people to help me push the stroller in the snow or how I didn't have enough strength on some stairs and I dropped the stroller from the fall to hold it and I was seriously injured. I only dreamed of someone helping me a little and sleeping, I dreamed of going to courses, studying and developing. And for a vacation only the two of them didn't even get my dreams there. Second child in case of problems, good luck at the age of 29, quite normal, if you are still waiting for not only the problem you had but also age, it will be a factor, because it is getting harder, the eggs are shrinking, nothing that is no longer news "40- 50 year old star to give birth ". Good mothers don't make them in Isho, from our vomiting universities producing a jeep for a prize. Your husband is happy and loves you. And lastly, I'm writing to you about postpartum depression. When the child grew up, I saw that the way of life had ruined me, I met a psychologist. Sober me up even more, for the real situation in my life, due to lack of support we had hit rock bottom with my husband. Although he is a decent man, he could not help me, often he was not even there for days. And you know, the psychologist told me that no matter how bad I was, the circumstances were such that I couldn't afford to get depressed because I realized I was alone and there was no one. I hope that after what I have written, you will see your life with different eyes. You have no reason to be in this state. Life is the children, your husband, not a job in a company. After 40 years, would you regret slowing down your career? Or you would be sorry for things in your family. In fact, things are incomparable. due to the lack of support, my husband and I had hit rock bottom. Although he is a decent man, he could not help me, often he was not even there for days. And you know, the psychologist told me that no matter how bad I was, the circumstances were such that I couldn't afford to get depressed because I realized I was alone and there was no one. I hope that after what I have written, you will see your life with different eyes. You have no reason to be in this state. Life is the children, your husband, not a job in a company. After 40 years, would you regret slowing down your career? Or you would be sorry for things in your family. In fact, things are incomparable. due to the lack of support, my husband and I had hit rock bottom. Although he is a decent man, he could not help me, often he was not even there for days. And you know, the psychologist told me that no matter how bad I was, the circumstances were such that I couldn't afford to get depressed because I realized I was alone and there was no one. I hope that after what I have written, you will see your life with different eyes. You have no reason to be in this state. Life is the children, your husband, not a job in a company. After 40 years, would you regret slowing down your career? Or you would be sorry for things in your family. In fact, things are incomparable. the circumstances were such that I could not afford to become depressed because I realized that I was alone and there was no one. I hope that after what I have written, you will see your life with different eyes. You have no reason to be in this state. Life is the children, your husband, not a job in a company. After 40 years, would you regret slowing down your career? Or you would be sorry for things in your family. In fact, things are incomparable. the circumstances were such that I could not afford to become depressed because I realized that I was alone and there was no one. I hope that after what I have written, you will see your life with different eyes. You have no reason to be in this state. Life is the children, your husband, not a job in a company. After 40 years, would you regret slowing down your career? Or you would be sorry for things in your family. In fact, things are incomparable.

   From the Author Thanks to everyone who commented on my topic. I study pedagogy, half of my family are teachers, in general, if I do not graduate, I will be the first without higher education in the family. But that's not what motivates me to study. In fact, my child is my biggest motivator. If until 2 years ago for me pedagogy was just a pleasant job with great working hours, now I really feel it as a vocation, as a goal in life. Now I want big reforms in the education system and ... a good teacher is a student all his life, I want to have time for my personal development. My initial shock passed and I realized that my children were part of the road, not a brake. Unfortunately, I realized it quite painfully. I had pain on Monday night, now I will have to take medication for detention until the 3rd month, but everything is fine. I was terribly scared. I apologized to him that I have harassed him with bad thoughts and will now look forward to him with love. For the university, I decided to meet with the inspector, explain to her how things are and possibly come up with a program with exams and internships. Many thanks to number 13 for this sentence. You have SUPPORT to do everything, just open your worldview and trust the people who are ready to help you and are behind you. I write it down, read it and wish it became my nature.

   Don't make the mistake of getting rid of it, because you will regret it for the rest of your life, even if you think now that it won't

   Well, it is normal and people with "problems" who can not get pregnant and women who do not want pregnancy at the moment to protect themselves in some way, then when you do not expect it comes.

   The child is a gift that many people are deprived of. Its "removal" as a solution for some mothers is motivated by the misconception that they remove from their body a cell formation that does not feel pain. I advise you to look at pictures of abortions on the Internet and see that it is a small man, with his little hands, feet, head, who feels pain - they actually kill him with tools or a vacuum. The professional vocation is one, but the mother's is higher. Teachers - many, the mother is one. Accept this miracle, if you want you can handle everything. The difference between my children is 1 year and 10 months, I worked, we paid off a loan, I cooked, cleaned, did not sleep - I survived and I am happy, patient, loving and I do not blame them for the difficulties and unrealized career growth :)