Hello. I have a friend for almost a year, everything is going very well. We are happy and we love each other. But I decided to ask if you thought it was normal that he didn't invite me to his house. I went once at the beginning of our relationship, but that's it. I don't know his parents personally yet. I know he has serious intentions for me, at least that's what he says. But isn't that a little strange. It's not that it bothers me ... I don't care who knows what, it doesn't matter much to me, it's just a little weird. I guess it's not convenient for him, maybe because more people live in them, but we are still big people, 21 and 23 years old, there should be no problem. I invite him home from time to time, he knows ours. And in the summer, when I'm alone, I invite him to sleep. But isn't it right for him as a man to invite me once, or at least to introduce me to his parents?
Answers 17
Every family is different. I don't think he wants to embarrass you in front of theirs, they may have outdated understandings. The solution is one - you are great people, find a job and move into a room. Even as students you can work. I am ashamed of people your age living with their parents.
It could be like me. I explain - my former girlfriend, whom I loved and for whom I had serious intentions, I had introduced her to my parents, even to my father's colleagues (because they work next to our house). She later left me, and now I have no intention of introducing my current one to my parents, unless I am absolutely sure that the scenario will not happen again.
Number 1, It would be a shame if the minimum wage was BGN 1,000. One room is not 50 cents per month. :) Otherwise I agree with the parents, they may have a strange way of thinking.
Obviously, his serious intentions are still not so serious, since he does not consider it necessary to introduce you to your parents.
He may be worried about his parents or his home, for reasons much sooner, try to go out somewhere and live separately!
The boy has complexes related to his family. He may even be ashamed of their behavior. My husband introduced me to his parents two months before the wedding. I understand it because I was also ashamed of ours, they have their own understanding of their way of life and it was not easy to take him to ours. I have been living in a dormitory since I was 18 and I was very mentally abused by how he would adopt their way of life. I have been married to him for 12 years, without a wedding, and ours and theirs have seen each other twice / in our country / and for reasons / baptisms of children /. I avoid any contact, both with one and with the other parents. Our parents live their lives according to their understandings and have requirements for everyone who steps into their home to live their way. It is incomprehensible to my mother-in-law how I can not be too religious.
He's probably embarrassed to invite you over. The reasons can be many, some of them even insignificant or funny. Don't take it as a bad thing. I'm your age (22) and I don't have a girlfriend, but if I had I would definitely prefer to meet somewhere else, not at home. I would just feel better.
My parents have such an outdated understanding that when I brought my girlfriend to you for the first time, they almost married us. Separately, I am quite ashamed because all the furniture and appliances and what not are called 20 years. You understand what I mean.
It may not be nicely furnished, in 2 words it should be misery and the boy should be ashamed, you should predispose him to this conversation, but you say that you were in them, this may not be the problem, I had such a problem. .. and for almost a year and a half I had not invited my girlfriend home.
Are furniture and appliances most important in a home, or the souls of the people living in it? Unfortunately, young people have become great materialists. Whatever the understanding of the parents, they have created you and deserve at least a little attention. What if he takes his girlfriend to his parents more often? Of course, she is not materialistic (nothing says that she does not like something in the arrangement of their home), she is not interested in their understandings, she just wants to feel that there is a human, spiritual connection in this family, why not did she feel this connection too, if she has it of course? In my opinion, rather, her boyfriend has a problem communicating in this family and does not want to disappoint her. So he avoids taking her there. The author is a big and mature woman, she will inevitably understand the reason, but whatever it is, more important for her is how the man treats her, whether everything is fine with them. In the end, she will live with him, not with his parents, but even if the contact with them is good, it will complement their happiness. When the mother-in-law is interfering - bad, when the mother-in-law is on the side - still bad, what do you want women?
11, furniture and appliances are not the most important, but still the condition of the home is judged by the people in it. they do not have to be expensive and new, it is important that it is clean and cozy. unfortunately, not all people maintain their home so that they can invite someone to visit at any time. moreover, she worries that it may mean that the relationship is not serious enough for him. do not immediately declare people materialistic
Full support for number 3
Author: I don't think the problem is in the furniture. And I don't think he cares at all. After all, I went to them once and I know what his home is like. And that doesn't bother me, it doesn't matter. Besides, we've been together for a year now (and we've known each other for more than 2 years), we are supposed to be close, we shouldn't worry about that. This option is rejected. Maybe number 11 is the closest to the truth ... When I'm with him and everything is great, he even talked to me about family and children over time. Maybe this is indicative. But sometimes I feel weird and wonder if we're as emotionally "connected" as I want to be. Or I suggest different things because I find it hard to trust ... Thank you for the comments.
Your friend the author may have some worries about her home if you have shown that you did not like something or he is so ashamed to say something about them. Maybe from the presence of a parent or a grandparent, even from the neighbors he may be worried. And he may want your relationship not to be as represented by dating and firmly stated intimacy. They may make repairs and have nowhere to invite you, and even if it is not warm in them, I understand the boy. to share a room with a brother or sister, there may be many questions here. Once you went, you know. But he may have had some problems after your visit there. So wait, he may not have decided to meet or get acquainted with theirs, sometimes the boys have more superficial intentions, and we expect them to have already introduced us to theirs. Good luck and I believethat you will soon forget about your question here and everything will be smoothed out for you and him.
He may be married, so if he's generally secretive, burn your mind;)
Don't worry at all that he doesn't care about you. My friend also did not want to introduce me to theirs, I had not visited them, although I met him with my house and my family in the third month of our relationship. I thought he wasn't holding on to me. I later got into a conversation with him on FB with an old friend of his, in which he explained about me: he had initial doubts about me that I was not serious, that I was a "thief" and did not want to meet us until he was at least a little convinced that I had serious intentions towards him .... When our relationship deepened, we met ... But he had other motives, which he shared with me over time. Ours are very open and responsive people, while theirs are a little more closed. He was afraid they would scare me and think they were the Adams Family. And also that, that they are not much repaired. It's not all ideal petroff in us either;), but I'm above these everyday things and I didn't worry. His ex-girlfriend used to take her earlier, I remember, but she was a little wild girl - in the sense that they lived like dogs - misery, dirt, Turbo gum patches on furniture, ancestral chases, dog hair and beds with torn mattresses. which fed springs, so my friend's home for her was a five-star luxury. So, I started walking and he calmed down a bit, and now we love each other so much that we decided to work together and do everything ourselves - at home and at home, so that we like it and we are comfortable and one day we can say, "What we have done, we have achieved ourselves." His ex-girlfriend had taken her earlier, I remember, but she was a little wild girl - in the sense that they lived like dogs - misery, dirt, Turbo gum stickers on the furniture, grandparents' chaise, dog hair and beds with torn mattresses. which fed springs, so my friend's home for her was a five-star luxury. So, I started walking and he calmed down a bit, and now we love each other so much that we decided to work together and do everything ourselves - at home and at home, so that we like it and we are comfortable and one day we can say, "What we have done, we have achieved ourselves." His ex-girlfriend had taken her earlier, I remember, but she was a little wild girl - in the sense that they lived like dogs - misery, dirt, Turbo gum stickers on the furniture, grandparents' chaise, dog hair and beds with torn mattresses. which fed springs, so my friend's home for her was a five-star luxury. So, I started walking and he calmed down a bit, and now we love each other so much that we decided to work together and do everything ourselves - at home and at home, so that we like it and we are comfortable and one day we can say, "What we have done, we have achieved ourselves." from which springs are fed, so my friend's home was a five-star luxury for her. So, I started walking and he calmed down a bit, and now we love each other so much that we decided to work together and do everything ourselves - at home and at home, so that we like it and we are comfortable and one day we can say, "What we have done, we have achieved ourselves." from which springs are fed, so my friend's home was a five-star luxury for her. So, I started walking and he calmed down a bit, and now we love each other so much that we decided to work together and do everything ourselves - at home and at home, so that we like it and we are comfortable and one day we can say, "What we have done, we have achieved ourselves."
Author, if your alarm goes red, then it's RED - he's just not serious enough with you, all the other nonsense that he is overwhelmed by his parents and his home are the result of self-deceived individuals. He's not serious about you and hides something from you the two factors - the only factors, you don't have others. How can you not bother to invite him - but it's so very nice and comfortable for him, don't you think