Hello, everyone! A young girl is writing to you. I am writing this topic because I recently read a man complaining about so-called "jerks" with big bellies and other silly descriptions of how they went with young women and young women went with them only for the money. People's attitudes toward others and the world have changed dramatically. Everyone insults and criticizes without putting themselves in the place of the other and without insulting him. First of all, men of 40-50-60 do not fall into the category of "jerks" at all. Not everyone has bare heads, big bellies, disgusting, etc. Of course, there are those who are not maintained and are not so attractive, but there are men who even at 70 look great. A matter of personal choice and preferences. Some women or girls (like me) like mature and big men. I don't know why, but I've been like this since I was little. Maybe because of my father or just because I'm older. Now, let me guess, some professors will start telling me that I was like a gold digger and the like. Well, I'm not like that, I won't get up. I have dignity and will that I will keep. I am not at all interested in money, the car (the car is needed only for work), the property, the profession, etc. The profession is important, as long as you do not sweep the streets. The strangest thing for me is this - because when they see a mature man with a young girl, the thought flashes in everyone's mind - "He's the one with her for sex, and she for the money." And when they see a young boy with a mature woman - "This is love."
Why are most people now so superficial and complex, hateful and unsupportive? Yes, there are such girls and men, but why do you put everyone under a common denominator? Is it wrong that I love and am in love with a man much older than me ..? There are pros and cons in such a relationship, but the love between the two people is the most important. How are gays accepted, and people like me and others with a big age difference in the relationship - no? Taboo or something else ...? Author, one day you will become a "jerk" and you will look younger, and they will say the same about you. I'm sure you won't like it .. I continue .. A mature man knows how to behave with a girl. He knows what he wants and doesn't fool you. Let me add that I'm not talking about sex, gifts, caresses and pampering. Yes, we have different values because of the times in which he lived and in which I, a different generation with different views. However, we still understand each other. He doesn't look at you as a little girl but as a woman. He believes in your success and helps you realize your dreams. They are supportive and dedicated. Care and stealth also play a role. I repeat - not everyone is like that. It's one thing to see "paws" at 18 (I call them paws because they behave like that) with poor vocabulary and knowledge, they smoke and drink like they haven't seen and a bunch of other things that repel me, it's another to see a mature man, intelligent , good looking, with rich vocabulary and knowledge. Personally, I'm glad I don't like kids my age.
To be honest, I don't understand you. I don't understand what his problem is, what do you see wrong? Please, people who will offend me or are against these connections, just save your comment. Have a nice day / evening! they smoke and drink like unseen and a bunch of other things that repel me, it's different to see a mature man, intelligent, good-looking, with a rich vocabulary and knowledge. Personally, I'm glad I don't like kids my age. To be honest, I don't understand you. I don't understand what his problem is, what do you see wrong? Please, people who will offend me or are against these connections, just save your comment. Have a nice day / evening! they smoke and drink like unseen and a bunch of other things that repel me, it's different to see a mature man, intelligent, good-looking, with a rich vocabulary and knowledge. Personally, I'm glad I don't like kids my age. To be honest, I don't understand you. I don't understand what his problem is, what do you see wrong? Please, people who will offend me or are against these connections, just save your comment. Have a nice day / evening!
Answers 32
Thank you I support you! A woman of 22 years.
In my opinion, a mature man, raised and educated in some much more difficult and harsh times, can give you much more both in attitude and life experience than a broiler from the current Liglians. Years ago I had such a relationship, and I am terribly sorry. that I stopped her precisely because of such prejudices ... Now the man is happy, again with a much younger woman than him, they have a child. And I .. from relationship to relationship, so for 10 years, always looking for Him .. No one has ever loved me like that, has not been so direct and honest with me. He didn't carry me like that. And I broke his heart with stupidity. And from listening to "advice" from friends and parents.
Reuniting with someone with whom you have a very big age difference speaks of some hidden problems, and beyond that there are many objective factors that make such relationships inappropriate. I will give an example to make it clear. You are young now, yours at 40-50-60. In 20 years you will be at his funeral, and you will no longer be so young for many things, including children. Or you will have made them, they will be left without a father early on, and in recent years you will have to watch both him and them, instead of him being your support. Women live longer, but we rarely get together with younger ones. That is, you doom yourself to loneliness when yours leaves, because the older men will already die or very little, and those of your age will be younger. You will be at the peak of your sexuality in 10 years, and he will barely lift the plane and go to treat the prostate. Etc. Here I will add something subjective, but for me personally, the body and vision of a person who is 10 years old can not be compared with that of someone my age, no matter how well maintained. So, you have the right to like what you want, but there is nothing to be surprised when others do not accept it. You don't have to think of a woman as a gold digger to look down on such a relationship. Otherwise, it is clear why a man will want to be with a young girl, we have nothing to comment on. when others do not perceive it. You don't have to think of a woman as a gold digger to look down on such a relationship. Otherwise, it is clear why a man will want to be with a young girl, we have nothing to comment on. when others do not perceive it. You don't have to think of a woman as a gold digger to look down on such a relationship. Otherwise, it is clear why a man will want to be with a young girl, we have nothing to comment on.
What you wrote is great. And I always wonder about the negativity that people vomit on one occasion or another in the comments, in the case of relationships between people with a greater age difference, whether the man or woman is older. Both options have been criticized. Not that they shouldn't express opinions, they shouldn't accept something, they shouldn't agree, they shouldn't like something, but I don't understand why there should be insults and malice in their comments. It is normal to have a different opinion, a different perception of things.
An article on Facebook invited me to be positive instead of cynical and I said that I would try not to write something sarcastic but to recall chronologically what some women wrote here before and now. The first was that the older men had settled down and not like their peers, and so on. Then, years later, women misled by these judgments complained about how these "settled" men smelled of old men, had no desire for sex, did not go out anywhere, and were not treated for anything. Now came a new generation of "intellectuals" who decided to find hot water and would biohack life by catching someone "settled" to shake themselves in the same situation and then complain about their lives. Without being too cynical and sarcastic, ladies, consider a situation from all sides before embarking on another nonsense, okay?
not
I saw that topic and I was indignant because it was written by a man and not by a mother, for example ... then I would understand somewhere. I have a relationship with a 16 year old man. bigger than me. I've always liked people bigger than me. This figure was big for me too, but when I saw it I was not interested in anything else. Everyone at home was against it and that's normal. But if you feel love and want yourself, what does it matter? I am fully aware that one day it will be evident both externally and in sex (because everyone is excited about it), but nothing is known.
In 90% of the cases it is because of the money, you can constantly see rotten uncles (sorry mature) with young girls. In the rare cases when this is not the case, it is due to some paternal syndrome in the girl. I do not know what else you dig this topic.
Up to №5 - why everyone should agree to unify their position. And one more thing, the opinion is something that can change. I'm sure you see life differently now than when you were in first grade, for example. I'm a man.
He laughed, snorting. I am writing this topic because I recently read a man complaining about so-called "jerks" with big bellies and other silly descriptions of how they went with young women, and young women went with them only because of the money. to the world it has changed radically. Everyone insults and criticizes without putting themselves in the place of the other and without insulting him. " And the last sentence of the boy's subject: "One thing is for sure: it's not about the money, because you're dragging whatever geeks and bastards you fall for, otherwise it would only be Donald Trump. Then why are you doing it?" Honey, why do you judge and criticize the boy without reading him and understanding the topic?
It's especially strange to me that people comparing age to intelligence ... get paid attention. Be with 90 years, there the experience is even greater. There will even be stories about WWII, about our army, etc. : д.
So if I express my opinion (and it does not coincide with your views) I am a negativist, right? You want to be accepted with your different opinion (that you like older men), but you don't want to accept the others who don't think like you ... Well, that's your problem ... Who wants to go with who wants. But I have the right to speak. And my opinion is that it is good that there is no huge difference in age ... Women in 80 percent of cases give in "for a moment", "for a moment" .. Let's face it because "tomorrow" may not come. I'm fine, but what are you talking about? For pleasure or for marriage to such a person. If you like having sex with men at 60 - do it. But if you have decided to marry one, it is good to think when you are 30 and at the peak of your sexuality whether he will be able to retaliate. And who will look after the children if, God forbid, something happens from a purely age point of view. Your writings are thoughtless.
I am 22. I had a relationship with a man 16 years older than me and 2-3 times dating and courtship with men again over 10 years older than me. Of these, I only had sex with the one I had an affair with. Commendable flexibility and endurance, many 20 year olds will put them in their back pocket. But that doesn't change things. Yes, these men are more playful, calmer, more responsible and have polished themselves enough to know when and how to behave. But the difference is there. Every time you feel that this person wants to start a family and you are not at this stage of your life, the difference is there. Every time you go out with his friends, the difference is there. Yes, they may be punctual, talk to you and accept you as an intelligent girl, but for them you will always be the "little one". To you, they will be good acquaintances, not your friends. Every time, in which you want those childish little jokes, in which you get a little childish, the difference will be there, in the way he looks at you. Every time he tells you how to behave, talk, etc., because he has lived longer and knows better, your difference will be there. Because he may see you as a woman, but with such a difference he will secretly or obviously try to re-educate. He will instinctively do so, even if it is not intentional. She's there all the time. You can't be angry that people don't deny it. She is there. It's between you. Even when you pretend you don't see her. And when you build such a relationship, you voluntarily accept this black hole, the age difference that will take away some of your experiences. And you accept that there will be people who are against. My friends joked a lot with me at first, then stopped. If you really want this connection, you accept this shortcoming. I can say for myself that in all my relationships I was the youngest. My smallest difference was 4 years. Now I want someone my age with a maximum of 4 years difference. Only the younger ones have been circling me lately, I don't know if it's karma haha, if the younger ones have the courage. It will be strange to be honest and I can't just try. I went through the connections with the bigger ones, I tried different things. Now I want the person with whom we will share interests, we will have common or overlapping circles of people. We will walk together on the path of life. We will feel in the right place with each other. I have observations of couples who are the same age. Some of them build such a connection with each other, which I never built. I want her! In almost all couples with a big difference, because I have such acquaintances, the younger one thinks it at a certain moment. Believe it or not, you will think about it. You will ask one day. So don't offend your peers. It is true that most are caught one, hit the other, but the big ones are not perfect. And yet they are still learning.
Yes, it is much easier for the opposite couples: mockery, discrimination in adoption, blasphemy from the church, threats from skinheads. Pink. Dude, gerontophilia may not be banned by law like pedophilia, but that doesn't mean society will tolerate it. If you want to start a family with a person whose age is like your father's and whose semen will soon become a varnish thinner, go ahead. But to claim nonsense and grumble that people with a different opinion should not express themselves is quite pathetic hypocrisy.
I support such relationships because I have witnessed my mother's relationship with her boyfriend, they are 18 years apart, they have been together for 7 years. The man is not old at all, he looks extremely good for his age, he is a professional athlete and trains regularly. Not to mention the attitude - he accepts me and my sister as his own children and has never treated my mother badly, unlike my own father. Yes, my mother is not one of the young 20-year-olds, who according to some are gold diggers, but the fact is that their difference is big. And yet they love, understand and support each other. Don't judge such relationships in a hurry, because everything is up to the person, there are blown and untangled at 30 and cool and maintained at 60. And just to add that their sex is great without Viagra (yes, my mother and I discussed it because we are close and I'm not ashamed). Point. F18
To 2-B Many things you are right-indeed a mature man can give much more to a woman, but do not regret so much for the missed chance with your older friend. .You are still very young and you can't appreciate them. I have a girlfriend with a big age difference with her husband. Yes, they live, she respects her but on the one hand he no longer wants entertainment, but peace at home. She is still young and Not to mention sex, he can't do anything for a long time. To cover them, a young family, who are quite noisy in their bed performances, moved in. So she constantly went to argue with them, that they prevented her from sleeping, in fact, he is jealous because they don't have sex. Don't feel sorry for this man, you just weren't meant to be with him.You broke his heart - a man with a broken heart will not change you so quickly, marry, have a child. Your parents and friends hardly thought badly of you by advising you to leave him. These are simply the inexorable laws. of life.Not all young men are rubbish, and you will meet your man.
Not that I blame relationships with a striking age difference (for me personally Max 10 years), but my daily life is filled with communication with people of all ages and I fully understand why many girls already go and start families with older people. I'm sorry, but pishlems at the age of 20-26 behave like children, bragging about who's who, what kind of car he drove, who drove and more and more ... Well, what can a decent girl of their age like who thinks about serious relationship and up to 2-3 years will require a child, family. In their face he does not see a partner with whom to grow old, to be a father by example, etc. Of course, there are decent boys at this age as there is garbage at 30-40 years, but this is my observation, because I communicate every day and I meet people aged 16 to 40 and I see the difference.
Congratulations dear, thank you!
No, it's not wrong and I don't understand why you are influenced by other people's opinions. Especially from strangers who are not a factor in your life. People who like to stigmatize and spit on everything and anyone who does not follow their way of life are unhappy, dissatisfied with their own lives. If they weren't, they wouldn't have time to vent their anger on others. Opinion is one thing, spitting and imposing is quite another, it is a pity for them that they do not realize it.
In fact, what is the criterion and who determines whether it is wrong? People or participants in the relationship? If it suits both of them, there is no violence, infidelity and pedophilia, what is the problem? He went to die early. There is no perfect person. If he's not old, he'll be a drunk. If she's not a drunk, she'll be different. There are no perfect people. Either way, something has to be compromised. Do you think that young anabolic dudes or young drunks will live long?
Number 14, just to get along. It is statistically proven that 90-96% of pedophiles are the opposite. Indicative percentage.
Haha, here all the losers click one star, because they know that they have no chance to catch a boyfriend against mature men :)
Some young people are very busy tickling singles, because it does not shine on them with women.
I take off your hat not only because you think like a mature person, but also because you explain exactly, clearly and in detail to the "broilers" how they should behave. I'm 39 and I can't see such girls in their 20s and 25s who explain in public how "mom" bought her an epilator and depilated her triangle. Hugs and kisses between two girls and a violent giggle when a "broiler" spoke to them. Most are that type. How would you attract attention from a man? Not from gender. Grandpa Tosho
Yes, 22 23, I also do not know how I provoked the anger of someone, given that in my comment there is not even half an insulting word - I am №16. So I guess this site was created - to share open opinions, to help someone with advice if you can of course. I just wanted to advise the young lady not to look to the past, not to regret anything, to look only forward. But drive ...
I am very annoyed when I see a young girl walking with an old man aged 40-45. For me this is not normal, it is also not normal when a young man walks with a much older woman than him. Are there not so many young people with whom young men and women can be together? Why should you go with a man of your mother's and father's age? I don't envy such couples, but it's annoying non-stop to flaunt it and play the same topics 5,000 times. Okay, make love to your uncles and aunts, but you don't have to and you shouldn't force that.
Your reasoning is great! It's like you wrote my words.
They started to think about what would happen in 20 years ... Look around you, the relationships and marriages of your acquaintances with peers, how many of them last 10 years? Under 20%, right? Well, what are you going to worry about in 20 years, then ... And life expectancy is slowly but surely increasing. This means that where until recently 10 years of cohabitation was possible with a large age difference, now 20 years is possible, ie. enough time to raise children and make them adults.
17, not that you rebuke them, but you rebuke them.
17, but no. I have been alone for 5 years. At first he called me for a while to ask if there was a chance we could get together. A woman around my age appeared in his life. She must have been courting him for at least a year ... Let me not go on, it hurts. Now they have a 2-year-old son, and he is not yet 50. He plays sports. He is already very successful in what he does professionally. For almost 10 years I have been looking for some of his peers, albeit a bit similar. They are no longer my peers, in a sense compared to that time. We seem to be approaching his age then, but no chance. Apparently the next generations are terribly of poor quality. Or at least they are not of high quality, I don't know.
№29, even if he spends enough years for the children to grow up, the last 10-20 years will not be in bloom and the young woman and the children will have to look after him instead of the other way around. And this in good cases, most people nowadays crash early. And even if she pushes to look after the children, in the end she will still leave a woman alone, who is no longer old enough to be glued to men. The fact that many young people divorce early does not guarantee a long-term marriage for couples with a large age difference, nor does it compensate for the obvious disadvantages, many of which have not even been mentioned yet. So, get together with whomever you want, but at least be objective and don't grumble that others aren't turning a blind eye to you.
Is it wrong to be with a centenarian who is already measuring his coffin and smearing his joints with machine oil? No. It is wrong to ask others for their opinion on the condition that they persist if they do not agree. It is wrong to say to whom it is easy without knowing the reality. It is wrong to make a conscious choice against a social norm and to grumble about the expected consequences. If the taste of plastic chin excites you and the creaking (not from the bed) in bed makes you wet, great. However, society may not be obliged to support your particular subspecies of perversion. Maybe your hurt feelings are your problem, not a collective one. Maybe your actions are tolerated (ie, they charge patience), not encouraged. You do what you want. You are not obliged to even breathe, it is provided that you want to live. You make your choice, you endure the consequences.