My last serious relationship was atypical. She is older than me, with self-confidence and liked by everyone, demonstrating independence and assertiveness. I decided it was my love. Is this my future? I can't expect a real family. I can't enter into a dialogue with her because she is unappealable in her reasoning and fills me with questions. I can't promise to be by her side because I'm not aware of myself. I miss her when she's away and I'm calm when I don't think about her. I find reasons to see her rarely, and when I see her I go back to the past, and the future is a fog. I miss sex, but that will be for a while. I don't know how she is. I accept that she still wants me. At least it doesn't repel me when we see each other. Isn't it time to orient myself to some typical relationship for which I am not so impersonal and unreliable? To her, I am someone. Is she for me?
Answers 16
Obviously here you are the passive and she the active, you are for each other. Try it, you have a chance.
It is a creature deeply confused in thought, in its social role and in its sexuality. You have NO future with her! What kind of "love" do you have since you don't speak the same language at all? You say yourself - there is no dialogue! What do you do together? Having sex will not make you a relationship, or a family, or children ... What will you do in 2-3 years, when your thrill passes? And why did she get caught with a smaller one, is this normal among women? Don't you think there's a deep problem that made her do that? For example, that no normal and true man would tolerate such dominant and unappealable behavior? She needs a BOY, without the relevant life experience, still exalted by the "modern" feminist and gender views on women's equality (which has long since ceased to be an aspiration for equality, but claims to superiority ...), etc. Tip: find a woman who feels like a woman and wants to be a woman - tender, feminine, loved and loving, who wants to have children and a normal family! My wife is also a professor and vice dean of a faculty. But MY WIFE is at home. We both take care of the children and the household, depending on who has how much time in addition to their current official duties. We walk hand in hand in the park - not because someone is driving us ... At a theater, cinema, dance party or party, she is my lady, and I am her gentleman. So it was and so it will be (I hope) for many years to come ... loved and loving who wants to have children and a normal family! My wife is also a professor and vice dean of a faculty. But MY WIFE is at home. We both take care of the children and the household, depending on who has how much time in addition to their current official duties. We walk hand in hand in the park - not because someone is driving us ... At a theater, cinema, dance party or party, she is my lady, and I am her gentleman. It has been and will be (I hope) for many years to come ... loved and loving who wants to have children and a normal family! My wife is also a professor and vice dean of a faculty. But MY WIFE is at home. We both take care of the children and the household, according to who has how much time in addition to their current official duties. We walk hand in hand in the park - not because someone is driving us ... At a theater, cinema, dance party or party, she is my lady, and I am her gentleman. So it was and so it will be (I hope) for many years to come ...
Dude, if there is no mutual respect and esteem, dump her this job. From now on, if they work this way, imagine what it will be like in 20 years. Besides, if you try to push something, you will immediately be nailed with a phrase like that you chose her and insisted on a relationship, not she to you. You may be dizzy now by the fact that you have entangled such an amazing woman in your nets, but believe me - you are currently playing the female role.
It's not her.
And you are stupid.
As a larger and more experienced, she is the stronger and more dominant person. You will always be a boy next to her, not to feel like a man. The relationship with such women depersonalizes men and makes them moldy, I think. And your future is what you build it for and it depends on your choice.
She is very aware of herself and in choosing a partner. But given that the choice is yours, so as not to confuse the lives of others, she has patiently given enough time and tactful withdrawal from you over the years to stop your hesitations and make the final decision yourself - Do you want to continue and share your life with Her, in anticipation of the best moments in the future or the time has come for me, we stop her and direct her to more promising relationships.
That's why you're the weaker sex, brother, that's why you never know what you want
It's not her.
No, it's not her.
Are you calm when you don't think about her ??? You don't love her, you're not even in love. What are you actually doing with her? You say you miss sex too. What are you wondering at all? !! It's not her - the answer to your question.
The lady is self-sufficient since she is the Alpha and has built this character does not need a man. All women are looking for a man who is stronger than them, both mentally and physically, but the lady in question is not looking for real men, but under a slipper!
If you don't look for her and postpone seeing her, as you ask yourself to look for a woman with your luggage. It is possible that the woman is attracted to the child in you and the opportunity to guide you. It looks like you're still a kid and she hopes you grow up properly. Maybe because of the age difference, to accept her as the mother you wanted to have and the feeling that when you go to bed with her you do something like incest. You may be struggling with your inherent submissiveness, imposed by your mother, which is reactivated by the woman's dominant behavior. In years to come, I believe you will overcome most of your fears and you will not be afraid of the woman you will be with then.
On the one hand, I also think that you are exactly for each other, from the point of view that you are both such people as intellectual snobs - you immediately caught my eye that you use a word as 'unappealable', and the woman in question also sounds very well-read as you presented her to us. So it's really awful to ask questions, for example, I can't stand people like that at all, regardless of gender or age. But I say it directly to myself, and I do not grumble behind the back of the exaggerators in question. I think you have a very serious problem with yourself - you are quite weak. That's why I believe that even with a more ordinary and insecure woman, you won't succeed either. In the beginning, while the chemistry is strong, it may elevate you a lot, but then it will start to see you as impersonal and unreliable, because you are like that and you broadcast it accordingly. Everyone has a character to show, even if he doesn't have much self-confidence - a lot of people don't understand that, especially men, they understand it, but a lot ahead of time (I can also explain why, but come on, it won't be now that I will deviate a lot). Instead of explaining to this woman, as a normal person, that she overdoes the questions, for example, you posted a topic on the net to complain to some strangers. It is best to stay alone with yourself and start analyzing yourself, and find out why you can enter into dialogue with some people and not with others. A self-aware person can enter into a dialogue with anyone who wishes. But with absolutely everyone. And you ... you don't love this woman. I also commented on the topic: 'Eight years difference and one more thing', that usually in all people, who have an attraction to older than them, whether they are women or men, there is something very immature. Otherwise, I realized, as I suppose many other people do, that this is now again a series of topics through which a bored person does some research. But good health. Let him be glad that we are commenting on a dozen people here and that he draws serious conclusions for the whole society .. :)
You shot me. She is not 10-15 years older to accept her as a mother! They are only 4 years old, but they are also important, because over time they will become more and more obvious. I know that I can't hope for children, and adopting is not my priority, as long as I can still have my own. I don't know why she has a penchant for younger men, but obviously she is attracted to them, and I will inevitably grow old and I will not fit into her ideas. It will happen that we both orient ourselves in different directions.
If he accepts you when you seek her, then he seeks her while passion holds you. There will come a time when one of you will orient yourself to another and your shared memories will fade. Then the question you ask yourself will be superfluous.