Hello. The story is too long. I started working, I met a man. We became friends very quickly, we were just friends, everyone was with a different person. After a few months, everyone broke up with their partner and we started a relationship. I was very scared, it was all at times and although we both loved each other like crazy, we broke up. I went out of town for 5 months. We kept in touch all the time, we were as close as before. I came home and we were both ready to be together again because we wanted to. A month before I returned, however, a girl appeared. A girl who has a boyfriend. Older, financially capable, but he is madly in love with her. She lies to him that she has feelings for him, that she wants to be with him, that she will dump the gentleman in question, but for half a year she has not done so under the pretext that they have been together for a very long time and there was no way but she still loves him and wants to be with him. In the end, the young lady spins two people to run after her, to please her and for her to live her life. I supported him, despite everything, because I love him too much to lose him. I was with him at all times, the bad thing is that we maintained other relationships. The girl's friend lives calmly without suspecting anything, she lives calmly thinking that there is everyone who asks. Only he and I are aware of this whole situation. After a while he got tired of waiting and hoping, we started spending more time together, he told me that he has feelings for me and maybe things will work out between us, maybe we should start over. But the young lady in question fascinates him again, and because he is naive, insecure and cowardly and susceptible to manipulation.
Now he is faced with a dilemma of which one to choose. I don't know what to do. He knows I'm waiting for him and I want to be with him. He also wants to be with me, but he is afraid, and he wants her too, even though he knows she won't leave her boyfriend. I didn't think I could be in that situation. Can't a man of 30 decide what he wants? Am I his best friend first and foremost? What should I do? Should I keep waiting and support him even though I feel terribly hurt, or should I just leave? He has a week to decide what to do? But rather the question is what should I do? Can't a man of 30 decide what he wants?
Am I his best friend first and foremost? What should I do? Should I keep waiting and support him even though I feel terribly hurt, or should I just leave? He has a week to decide what to do? But rather the question is what should I do? Can't a man of 30 decide what he wants? Am I his best friend first and foremost? What should I do? Should I keep waiting and support him even though I feel terribly hurt, or should I just leave? He has a week to decide what to do? But rather the question is what should I do?
Answers 7
Retreat. If he hesitates, then he is not sure of his feelings or his aspirations for you. This friend of yours sounds very stupid to me. What do you like so much that you love. Sounds better woman. I think he's with you because he's lonely, there's no one to be tied to his stupidity. He is not a man on the spot, you don't need one. Preserve yourself - nerves, dignity, self-esteem.
I'll write you directly what I think - he loves the other. Do not believe such nonsense - that she enchants him, that he is subject to manipulation. Try to enchant and manipulate someone who doesn't care about you. After all, we're talking about a 30-year-old man, not a teenager. You are just a backup option for him. I know you don't like what I'm writing, but listen to a woman more mature than you - the truth hurts once .... The lie - a thousand times ...
Even if he "chooses" you, he will continue to see her. But this time he will hide it! Is that what you want? F28
Well, you are the first reserve - act as such. If on one reserve and offer a titular place in another team what does? !! Either he changes the team where he is a starter, or he stands first reserve in the hope of playing.
I think the person who doesn't know what he wants is you, I saw a lot of questions in your post. I don't know how you tolerate this situation, for him to explain to you how it is with another, and for you to sit and wait, this is not love, but masochism. This lollo, just kick his jester, full p. That's right, the other option is to sit, wait and write anonymous posts.
He has you as a spare tire. He is in love with her and wants to be with her, but he keeps you for only if nothing happens to her, then it's your turn, so he won't stay dry. He doesn't care about you and you only suffer. On this one kick in the ass and find someone else for whom you will be №1 and will not hang you.
I'll tell you what I think, though it'll probably hurt. Your opponent is probably more beautiful than you. For many men, this is the most important thing. Don't get attached to all the talk of manipulation, etc. There are two manipulators in the polygon - the other woman and your man. If you really want it, I can advise you how to become a manipulator and what to do. Of course, you risk losing it forever, but it's better to get sick once now than more after a while. This tactic is well tested, the point is to be strong enough to do everything I will write to you. First, stop being always available. Human nature works in the following way - the harder it is to achieve something (in this case - a relationship with you), the greater its value (your value) in his eyes. In other words, the other woman may not be more beautiful, but is less accessible. She makes him wait for her. She meets him when she wants and when she is comfortable. He shudders in anticipation of her. He knows you're available, so he doesn't care. The question is - how to change this? How to increase your self-worth in his eyes? The answer - by stopping being available. I know from personal experience that men are very shocked when you change your behavior. If you were very kind and good, and then you ignore them, at first they don't even believe that you really do. My advice is to start answering his calls and messages for a few days, preferably 3 days. Or if it's your turn to call him, don't call him. You just ignore him until he finds you himself. I know it's hard, but do it. After he calls you, you wait 3 days. If he wrote you some excuses why he didn't look for you, ignore them and on the third day write him something like: Hello, how are you? I've been very busy lately, let's talk these days. It is important to sound light, carefree, neutral. Let him wonder what is going on. If you decide to follow this tactic, write and I will give you advice on how to proceed. The question is, do you really think such a man is worth it? Again, from personal experience, I dare say that such people are difficult to change. If he spins two now, he can do it again in time. that such a man is worth it? Again, from personal experience, I dare say that such people are difficult to change. If he spins two now, he can do it again in time. that such a man is worth it? Again, from personal experience, I dare say that such people are difficult to change. If he spins two now, he can do it again in time.