Hello! I need help, my son is 8 years old, and my brother-in-law has not had children for 5 years, except for my child, there is no other child in the house. But what happens he always makes noise and interferes, provided he is a very obedient child, but even if he passes through the room calmly he already makes a lot of noise. Remarks are made to him from the lower floor all the time, at first I didn't pay attention to them, but lately I've started to feel very crooked. I compare my son with his peers and find that he is a quiet and obedient child who does not know a bad word and there is no word in his dictionary to be rude to you, as only a child is used to spending his free time in front of the computer, TV or plays with his many toys, but still interferes. I don't have the money to move out, otherwise I would have done it a long time ago. Advise me how to react in future situations.
Answers 12
Speak delicately with your brother-in-law in a calm tone to reassure him that he does not have a child of his own and ask him when he is dissatisfied with something to talk to you and not to your child.
Hello. Here is one of my tips. Teach him to play quietly. When he makes no noise, don't make remarks to him, but play with him a bit and show him that you can live without a lot of noise. :) This way you will save yourself a lot of trouble.
I'm not very familiar with kinship, but my brother-in-law seemed to be the woman's husband's brother. Don't you have a husband in this connection? And can't you give this brother-in-law ... his mother? Will you think about him or your child's peace of mind? And what does "remarks from downstairs" mean? If you live on the top-more noise and that's it. But in general the story is not very clear to give advice.
You write on the websites that your brother-in-law has no children and you connect his remarks with this fact. I imagine them chattering in the neighborhood. You could share your problem and ask for advice without EMPHASIZING it. There are over 250,000 childless families in Bulgaria. They are damaged by fate. Be more generous and delicate. I wish your brother-in-law would pour two on him at once to show him how not to make remarks.
Wait ... I don't feel like it, but I will intervene as a professional. In my practice, after seeing a mother mistreat her child, after the case was finally closed, as therapy for angry, hurried, or annoyed parents, I introduced a code question. It is: "Are you listening to your child today?", Followed by an acclamation on my part to each parent or member of the child's family: "The law says: children do mischief, and adults enthusiastically buy them gifts or candy!" In your case, look for a person to work directly on the general and pedagogical culture of your brother-in-law. As a parent, you have no right to give in - your child needs a normal environment and normal activity, which includes activities that some adults call or define as mischief. Yes, but within certain limits, this is normal and necessary for child development. Just read, there are not bad publications about early and preschool education in children, experiment with your child positively, look for acceptable solutions for both adults and the child and if possible in time to include his brother-in-law in the process in good faith. A positive environment is important for both the child and you.
I try not to set the child against my brother-in-law, I maintain a good relationship, but I feel that I may soon explode. If he wants to run, he only weeds him outside, inside I don't let him, but still there are comments like: "You're going to keep quiet, Uncle is going to sleep", at a time when there is no noise from the little one, and and to us adults. We are watching TV in the kitchen at 4 pm and suddenly there is a shout from below for silence. The last time I made the little one go out in the yard for 2-3 hours so that he would not make noise / understand that he makes noise about them even if he only passes through the floor /. I have the feeling that we are hindering them, that there is just someone above them, but for now there is no way to change the situation. As for whether I have a husband - he is at work all day and when he comes home he is rotten and does not want to talk about any topic.
I understand you dear and I'm sorry for the naughty situation in which the child finds himself. I also did not have a child for 9 long years, but no child bothered me, I even enjoyed other people's children. Now I have a wonderful child who is my life and I would not allow anyone to keep his tone when he is not guilty, whether he is a brother, sister, brother-in-law or someone else. Take care of your child. Love him and don't care about anything or anyone. Kiss the child and may God protect you and your family.
Thanks :) I needed good words.
Dear parent, the comments of others are correct. My mother always stood behind me and defended me, and taught me to fight on my own. She always fought with teeth and nails for my happiness and defended my rights. Don't be offended that I give her as an example, but I am proud of her. Solve the problem so that your child is proud of his mother. A parent should not allow his or her child's rights to be violated. Be stronger and bolder. You can do it like any real parent. Deal with your brother-in-law by telling him that you may be annoyed by some factors. I tell you this from personal experience. I live in a block of flats and sometimes have to put up with and keep quiet about the nightclubs of the neighbors at the other entrance. However, when I have a reason to celebrate, they will not have the right to vote. I wish you health and good luck!
I don't want to be bad, but if his nephew can't stand the man, what will happen to his own children. It can't be that way. Wanting silence to go to the forest to live alone - his cane with a cane. Isn't the child a dog to tie? Don't harass him, ma'am, to please your brother-in-law. Let him know that it's not just him who lives in this house - others have rights too. The child is no exception. Protect your treasure and do not reprimand him for such things.
Years ago, when I lived in a house, my 9-year-old son and I were irreparable. Their behavior was irreparable. I put my daughter, who was 3-4 years old at the time, to sleep in the afternoon. Of course, my daughter was used to sleeping in the noise, but while she fell asleep she needed some silence. I went out to ask for silence. As a matter of course, they just looked at me and continued to make noise. - I turned to her and told her that when life and health the child appears. I will give it back to you no matter how ugly it sounds, I will make noise and you will understand what it is. It was very low on my part to say that. my simple words the kicking stopped. There is no dispute with the simplicity. I know that I did not help on the topic that I have to write something meaningful ...but with the author's problem I remembered before. There is also the fact that even with good words and to speak as if there is no humanity, everything is in vain.
№11 Explain to me what this means: “A parent should not allow his child's rights to be violated?” Yesterday morning at rush hour I was traveling in a crowded bus on public transport. And there a mother had got on the stroller and her child - about 2 years old. The child was not in the stroller, but was comfortably seated in a separate seat next to his mother, standing up all the time, cramming the seat with shoes, screaming and disturbing the passengers, and the mother just smiling at him.