Hello. I am a boy of 20 years. My childhood story may sound like you, but it's really important to me, because friendship, especially male friendship, has always been more than sacred. The people I call best friends are people I love more than brothers. But lately, I don't know what happened and the collar we moved away, they started to ignore me and isolate me. I'll start with the fact that my two best friends, whom I met, became much closer to each other.
This is not a problem for me, I'm even happy for them, but when we go out, they constantly ignore me and start their topic, which I can't get involved in. It makes me very dumb, I've told me a million times, even in a higher tone, that they're starting to annoy me and if they have a problem and don't want to communicate with me, they say it in my face like men, not to make me an idiot. But they keep saying that I'm filming and there are no such things. For example, yesterday, one was talking about whether to suggest to a girl to go or hurry. I didn't know what it was about at all, because he didn't tell me anything, and the other friend knew everything. Although I ask them every day how their daily life is going if there is news to share, they are silent to me, but they tell each other everything, they obviously go out without me often, but they hide. I don't understand what I challenged them with, as I have always been a good listener, I keep secrets to the grave, I have helped them countless times without insinuating it to them (and they have helped me), I am not a rusk and I always try to have fun but I haven't offended them with my gossip or anything. It's just that at one point they started ignoring me to the max without telling me why.
This is something very small, but I've also noticed it - if we go to a restaurant somewhere or get in a taxi, they always line up next to each other and start talking, and they leave me aside and think of rain and wind. What can I do to finally be told what their problem is and why they are so downright neglecting me? !!
Answers 15
Hi, I recently had a similar problem with "ex" friends. They ignored me, talked about me behind my back and went out together all the time, and "supposedly" they were my best friends. For me, friendship is something very important and that's why I stopped looking for them and calling them and they don't irritate me at all anymore. I have a friend with whom we were not very close before, we went out from time to time, but one day after another date without me (about 30 minutes after I asked them if they were going out, and they refused), I was very bored and I called this girl, she came to us, I told her about the situation, and she turned out to be very understanding and now we are very close, we have fun and share EVERYTHING. I know I wrote a novel, but I want to tell you that sometimes people you don't trust can help you a lot. If you have other friends, just ask them if they've been through the same thing and if they can help you, and these two just dump them. Good luck from me and share what happened
Find decent friends. These do not happen. Start ignoring them when they look for you anyway. To blow it, fuck their mother. What are you male gossips about, you can also tell them in plain text that you do not like their behavior and that you dump them forever.
And I get into the same movies sometimes. But I'm 16 and I'm a girl. Think what you look like from the side ..
Don't you think that if they avoid, don't share and even hide from you, there's a reason for that? Maybe they just like each other more and are kindred spirits, accept him and be their friend again, without setting conditions. Trust between men is won, not negotiated. No bad feelings, The Wishmaster
Your friendship is over. This has happened ...
Most likely they just like it more. There is nothing to do. Look for other friends, and look at these as acquaintances you date.
Emmy, you're the third wheel brother. What do you care about them when they like to get married, get them a Bulgarian one and who is from where. Find a girlfriend if you don't have one and deal with her the way they do it ... do you know what your problem is that you are a mollusk, you are too much good and responsive. Today's world is so structured that the better your heart, the more they humiliate, trample and exploit. Change, I did it and I was not happier!
Girl 13 years old. For me, the situation is similar. Sorry I can't help it. I am told that in high school I will find real and better friends, but I can't believe it. write what's going on :)
Apparently they fit me better, as characters, and maybe as sexual attraction. The latter does not have to be realized, but just some resemblance to a desired visual model, pheromones or other similar nonsense. :) And when you think about the time when I had friends, and it happened to me - it's just hard and annoying to retell what excites you and what happened to all your friends. Not that on purpose, but one can't shine everywhere. It's easier for women because they are gossips by nature and this is one of the things they wake up to in the morning. :)
It happened to me too. Get away from them, start dating your other friends. Find activities and entertainment. He doesn't look for them first at all. They are not "begged" to pay attention to you. Pretend you're fine once you've told them, and they haven't changed. And you will see that in time they will get bored or quarrel and then they will look for you, but you will decide for yourself whether to go out with them again.
Thanks everyone, I think you are absolutely right. As for number 4, I don't think I'm filming in any way. These are people I have accepted as brothers, I have done them bear services, I have given them girls in whom I have been IN LOVE just so that they can be happy, my family has accepted them as their children next to me! Sometimes it happens that your friends (even when you met them as in my case) like each other more, that's life. But then why do they pretend to be my closest friends and invite me with them at all - to stand aside like a cheeky moron? Well, I'm offended, yes, but maybe it's because I've always been an altruistic person who sacrifices for others, and they are self-sufficient. I don't know, but I'm going to end this friendship now. I have many other friends who are supposedly more distant to me, but I realized that I can count on them much more. Now I'm just wondering if I should tell these two directly that I don't want to be friends with them anymore or just ignore them and explain nothing?
Well, what can I tell you, I've been in that position too. We were a company of three people, but they were always somehow closer. Over time, different things took us away. I noticed that they told me very little and asked me more about my things. When I ask something, they confuse me with general talk or things that are impossible to verify if they are true. For example, in order to get closer to the other, one of them made fun of me, trying to pick on me. So light, thin, but always at my expense, never against the other. In general, two people get along best when they are against a common enemy. Finally, it dawned on me that they were similar in character and therefore had each other. It was partly my fault, because I didn't have many other friends and I exaggerated the importance of our friendship a bit. I was not offended by this, I understand that I cannot expect or require someone to be my friend and respect me. I just stopped contacting them. One did not look for me anymore, the other we see by chance very rarely, but he still only shows curiosity to find out with whom what is happening, we have no real things in common with him. As advice, I can only say not to regret and limit your contact with them. If I look for you, fine, but you don't waste yourself. That is, success in the future.
At this age, it is proven that friendships fall apart, a big difference in interests begins to appear, and thus the friendship is exhausted, at the same time you make new friendships. This is because you move mentally, emotionally from one period in your life to another, you change yourself and therefore you have to start choosing the people who will be an important part of your life for the future. I recently had a similar problem with my best friend, I wondered for a long time what to do, if it's just temporary and we can improve our relationship again, but no ... Obviously we both already have different views, on me I wanted to keep our friendship, but there was clearly no such desire on his part. In the end, I decided to just tell him some truths I was silent about and tell you a stone fell from my heart. We clarified that we can no longer be friends as before, but at least keep our good memories and all the dramas, problems, secrets over the years remain between us. I advise you to do the same, say what you feel and think and it's over. There comes a time when you have to choose the people in your life carefully, don't try to force someone, nothing good ever comes of it. The past remains the past, no one has said you won't make new friends. M, 19 The past remains the past, no one has said you won't make new friends. M, 19 The past remains the past, no one has said you won't make new friends. M, 19
Author, to know that 'bear service' means a service that brings not benefit but harm to the one to whom you do it. ;) Otherwise, in your place, I would discreetly withdraw. There is no point in confronting them.
My story is the same, even worse. I did 18 days ago. 4 years ago I moved to a new teacher to find new friends, to meet new people, to change the situation. I found a group of about 4-5 people who seemed like nice people to me and I liked to communicate with them, so I was closer to them. At the beginning it was as if I was accepted in the group, we communicated, we shared, everything was fine. Subsequently, the group increased by a few more people, I was somehow left in the background, on the periphery. Although I felt neglected and deliberately ignored, I swallowed. Over time, the group began to divide, intrigues began (mostly by the girls, because we were 6 boys and 4 girls), the group split, everyone began to rejoice for the others and I was a direct witness to that, because, I was the only person, who was still in touch with everyone. Last year this group came together, they started to behave better with me, we went to parties, pubs, birthdays, etc. together. I just decided, things will really get better, these people have already accepted me completely. and everything was fine when a few days ago they stabbed me in the back with the biggest knife. I started organizing my birthday and invited each of them another friend (my best one, with whom we grew up together and are like brothers). Everyone was rolled up for the party, everyone said yes. I thought -ok so now I have to think of options to organize my rdto. I invited them to my father's apartment in the neighboring town where I live. In the last 3 hours, half, and more than 10 of the invited guests, write to me that they will not come because they are at work, go to hell, etc. n. In the end, the only people who respected me were my best friend from childhood and 1-2 more boys from the unfortunate group. Then I realized that this is the end, I cross out these people from my thoughts. As immature and baby as it sounds for a birthday to quarrel with more than half of my "friends", this rd proved to me who really had me for something and who didn't care. I quarreled with all this rubbish, which on the happiest day of my life saddened me, I removed them from my life, I blocked them wherever I could, that was with them, END !!! I don't care about these "people" anymore (if they can be called people at all), the only thing that bothers me now is how I will endure them for another year as a teacher (I will be in 12th grade). Therefore, in my opinion, if you no longer feel good with certain people, just get away from them, fuck them, let them live without you, and you give yourself a new chance with other people, another company. After all, these are not the last people on earth, are they? And it is useful when you are young to meet different people and come across the wrong ones, so that you can distinguish the real from the false friends.