Before I share my story, I want to thank the editors of this wonderful site and the people who took the time to read it. I am a 24-year-old girl, I am from a small town but I currently live in another larger one. At that fragile age, I came to know life as my peers might not even think it could be. My childhood was firmly normal. At the age of 6, I moved to another city because of my father's job. I had to say goodbye to all my friends and still find new ones in the other city. The bad thing was that I never succeeded .. I was a modest child, closed in on myself and living in my own world .. I emphasized the lessons and by the way I tried to make some other friendships but unfortunately I didn't succeed. Iiiiiiiiii so for 8 years my only friend was my little sister. Thank God she has it !! Everything was the same, each passing day was no different from the next .. One day we decided to visit relatives and old friends from the previous town. I will never forget how happy I was when my mom told me. Then I was 14, already a teenager I became more and more violent, nervous and depressed from everything. The next morning I got up very early and I started to pack my bags, I vaguely remember how mom and dad said that he would not be able to come because they do not let him go from work .. but then it was my least problem .. I I would see my friends, I would tell them how I am, what I saw and experienced, is there anything more important than that? !! .. Iiiiiiiiii we left like that, I had such a good time, I felt so strong, full of energy for new experiences .. Until one morning ..
I woke up screaming, shouts and cries. They were mom and grandma .. In the evening while my father came home from work, he was attacked by vandals and drug addicts, he fell, hit badly and that's how you stayed .. Here I lost another parent at the age of 14 .. I experienced it very hard as is assumed. Every night I stared at the front door and waited for him to come home from work to feel his father's shoulder. I was so desperate and disappointed with my fate that I didn't know what to do. After my father's death, everything became very difficult, my mother could barely cope with both of us, to be always full, well dressed, clean and tidy ready for school. Poor woman ... how did she manage everything? !! A few months later I met a boy. In the beginning, everything was fine, even perfect. I needed love, attention and tenderness, I needed someone to take care of me. I was just starting to recover, to face the storms of life and get into trouble again .. I was a victim of violence .. physical and mental, on the part of the boy I believed in and who I thought would take the place of my father's shoulder. For 2 years I was lied to, beaten, embarrassed, threatened, etc. I did not know what to do, I did not know how to react, I was small .. so timid and vulnerable .. After a while I gathered strength and fought against him. I managed to push him away and start another "new beginning" once again. Ehh, here is my happiness, I met the boy who changed my life ... who for 4 years has managed to show me the good side of life. We went through a lot ... a hell of a lot of difficulties with him, but nothing managed to separate us. And yet something in me still worries me, under the smile and the shell of the already happy woman hides a sad and injured child. Recently, my mother fell ill and can no longer work and cope with everything as before. Their income is barely enough to pay their bills, and sometimes that's not even enough. Now I take care of my mother and my little sister ... I work as hard as I can to cover my and their expenses so that my sister always has pocket money for school and my mother has medicine for the month. I admit it's hard for me .. damn hard !! Eee here is another obstacle .. I am recently unemployed, my friend and I moved to a bigger city to work more and for better money .. But for a month without a job ..
I am applying everywhere and I have no pretensions for work, I am a man girl I'll handle everything but alas, I'm still not doing well. One day I sat down and thought ... my friends are gone, maybe I drove them away with my constant negativity and my problems. I didn't even feel like I lost them, one day I just turned around and there was no one behind me. I feel lonely, I feel neglected, I repeat to myself "why me Lord? .. why me?" It's so hard for me, if only at the age of 24 he showed me how cruel he can be, what will he give me at 40 .. ? !! I don't have friends, I don't have time for fun, I don't have anyone to sit with and share this whole story with. My friend understands me, but he has his daily problems with work, etc. I want to start fresh, I want a really new beginning this time, I hope more successfully. What should I do? How to spend time on everything? How to deal with problems? How can I find a serious job to help my mother? !! I was thinking of enrolling to study but I can't afford it .. I have to work, I have to .. I need it .. Any advice from you .. is a piece of gold for me! Thanks in advance!
Answers 5
Thanks for sharing your story. You are a wonderful person. However, in my opinion, there is no one to give you advice - you are already doing great, and you will find a job. However, I advise you to look at the sea and go personally to ask hotels, restaurants, shops if they need staff. What qualification do you have? What profession? It's not fatal that you didn't go to college, but if you don't have a profession, it's time to take care of it. Craft is stolen, not learned. For example, chefs are in high demand and well paid. He just got a job in a kitchen as an assistant or a dishwasher, even on a plate - that's how Jamie Oliver started, for example. I feel sorry for your mother, grandmother and sister, but until you help yourself, you can't help them either. It's time to tell them how things are with you - your sister, for example, can take food from home and she doesn't need any pocket money (that's how I grew up), and your mother is a young woman and will just have to work - no way, at least until you get on your feet. Life is very cruel to the weak, but what does Christ say? "Love others as you love yourself." YOU MUST FIRST LOVE YOURSELF. That is, to put yourself first, because only in this way can you love others. For me, you are overwhelmed by the feeling of obligation to your mother, who has fulfilled only her duty as a mother and now thinks that you have a duty to her, but unfortunately that is not the nature. Parents have a debt to their children, and children have a debt to their children! This is the only way society works - the mother feeds the daughter in order for the daughter to feed her daughter .... With these souls on your shoulders, for example, how will you create a family and your children? If you don't, what's the point ??? And yet - I believe that you love this boy and everything, but I do not see her supporting you in your job search, and maybe he doesn't care - the money will go to strangers anyway, not for your family. How long will you live like this? Well, until he meets and LOVES a girl who has no other responsibilities! It is not by chance that the parents say goodbye and CRY at the girl's wedding - when you start a family with one man you become a FAMILY. He and you are a FAMILY, not you, your mother, your sister, etc. Yes, if you can - help. You are definitely a good person if you help, but if you can't? Christ says - if you have TWO shirts, give one to your neighbor. You don't have a shirt, you walk naked and want to give your skin to your neighbor and you even do people a disservice, because instead of your mother tightening up, your sister learning to live frugally - they rely on you, and you are not old enough to carry this burden . Good luck
from 1 again - I forgot to add to the topic with your friends. It is no coincidence that there is a saying "Share happiness with friends and keep the anxiety to yourself" Just as much as you think that your life is difficult, everyone has some problems and worries. Perception is subjective. For you, the problems of others may be small and yours may be big, but in the interest of truth, people with friends follow the above rule and you just don't know what they are struggling with at the moment. We meet with friends to share, but above all to experience something positive and to unload from problems and everyday life. You without realizing it have become a problem and a burden for your friends and they have separated from you out of a sense of self-preservation. Look around - which people have a lot of friends? Cheerful, interesting people.
Honey, you're a terribly strong young woman, so don't worry about your future. Whatever it is, you are ready to face any problem and any obstacle. So don't be afraid! And I am sure that your future will be much better than the present! Besides, you write that you are alone, but you are not! You have at least 3 very special people, your friend, your mother and your sister. Yes, your mother is not as strong and healthy as before, your sister is still young (you write that she goes to school), but all three of them love you and would do everything in their power to help you in a difficult time. So dear, be strong for them too! As for the job, I'm sure you'll find something, it's not easy, but it's not impossible, especially if you're not afraid of a lot of work and you don't have big salary claims. So head up, girl! And believe me that tomorrow will be a much more beautiful day! Success!
Friends. Only he who has encountered real difficulties, and has looked around, and next to him, if there is anyone left, then he can claim that he has a real friend. The others that disappear as soon as a problem arises, they are nothing and we better forget about them. As my mother-in-law used to say, light and finger: Friend-friend, green wreath not you. Because only the difficulties in our lives reveal whether we have friends. A true friend is just about that, isn't it - to extend a friendly hand at such a moment. And be with you in good and evil. But you are not sad. Anyone who knows you and knows your story can be proud to know you, you are wonderful, good and responsible. If you are already in a bigger city - you will find a job, believe in it. As there is a thought: And it will pass. And you are strong, there are no obstacles in front of you. I'm not reassuring you, your spirit is a little broken now, but raise your head, smile, give yourself courage. Everything will fall into place. It will not always be like this. Everyone has good and bad days. It's all a struggle.
Darling, I sympathize with you for what you have experienced. Like you, I lost a parent ... my mother at a much more fragile age. It is very hard and the loss is never overcome. Glad you have a wonderful family and friend who love and support you, that's the most important thing. And as for friends ... people come and go from our lives, there is nothing to do, but you never know what kind of people you will meet in the future and how your life will turn out. I wish you with all my heart to find a good and profitable job, to be able to help your family and most of all to feel satisfied with your life. It is obvious that you are a valuable person, continue to be like that and fight the difficulties, as you have done so far, and you will be appreciated wherever you go. I hope all the problems and failures remain in the past, to be happy, to create a wonderful family with the person next to you, to raise and educate your children to be combative and human just like you! Go ahead with a smile and a raised head, I hope only good things happen to you ... You deserve it! :)