Hi, I'm a girl of 16, a few days later (April 12) is my brother's birthday. He would have turned 24, but a year ago the whole family experienced a great tragedy. Ever since I was little, my brother had a strong passion for high speeds, initially riding a cross-country bike and then replacing it with a track. He went to fairs and participated in competitions. With a wide smile he said that the feeling of flying his bike is indescribable and worth every lev he has invested in its maintenance. He loved what he did and even thought of turning his hobby into a professional one. One day, however, he got off his bike and never came back. He was driving at high speed (as always) on one of the boulevards, on a bend, probably afraid that he would not take it, lost control of the car and hit a crash, died on the spot. He was taken for an autopsy, doctors said. that most of his bones were broken because the motorcycle had pressed him and he was somewhat lucky that he had died on the spot so as not to suffer. Since then, my mother has forgotten about everyone else, crying almost constantly, especially now that his birthday is approaching. He spends most of his time in his room, not allowing anything to be touched, everything is as he left it. My father started doing everything, trying to talk to her all the time, and she started crying even more and yelling at him that she would never be able to replace him. He tells her that she has another child, and she replies that she wants the other. When I try to talk to her, she tells me that she is not up to my nonsense at the moment and goes either to his room or to her bedroom. My father and I took care of everything - we cook, clean, wash and only he works. She doesn't even go out, when her friends invite her, she refuses because they would tell about their children and their successes, and she no longer has a child to tell. I'm also terribly sad for my brother, but I'm sadder for my mother. I am sad that she forgot me, that she thinks she no longer has children. I want my mother back, but she seems to have gone with my brother and I don't know how to get her back!
Answers 10
Unfortunately, there is no going back, the only solution is for a specialist to work with her and eventually after a long time she will change for the better but she will never be the same one you know. Take action before it's too late. My condolences to your brother :(
Your mother needs to get out of this state. The grief is great, but it was his choice, unfortunately. And she needs to understand that. She must work and be engaged in something. Consultation with a psychologist is not postponed. There is an association for crash victims, maybe they will help you.
Take her to a psychologist - this grief is not normal.
Give your mother time. One year is very little time to experience such a tragedy. She will never fully experience it, but now she still feels like it happened yesterday. Don't blame her, this is the scariest thing for any parent. Let him experience the pain. I am very sorry for your loss! It seems that now you have to be stronger and support your mother until we recover. In time, you will appreciate it.
I wish you good health and happiness for your birthday - it was mine yesterday and I turned 25. Condolences to your brother - sorry for his death
ops -Your brother's birthday
Why do you send her to a psychologist immediately? She lost her child. No psychologist in the world will be able to help her. Give me more time. She will never forget it, but in time she will get used to it somehow.
Time heals all wounds - this is the folk wisdom. In time, perhaps a long time, your mother's grief for her lost son will not be so strong and devastating. If your mother is young enough, she may want to have another child to replace her lost son - I have an acquaintance who lost her son in a tragic accident, now she has a new son. An option is to eventually adopt a boy who needs a mother and family. My advice is to wait patiently for your mother to overcome the loss and mental suffering and to start enjoying life despite the absence of your brother. Then he will pay more attention to you.
Bubi, look now. Your mother is deeply depressed. Take her and your father first to a psychiatrist - go to a health insurance fund, then to a psychologist. What it is in is a hole. I know you feel lost too, but it is total damage in the hole of self-pity. With your father, you need to show her that you care, despite the screams and outbursts. This is your mother again, she's just in a hole, she hasn't forgotten you, she has forgotten who she is. Help it to emerge. Good luck
Your mother is really a mentally ill person, I understand that she suffers for your brother, but it is not normal for her to roar and forget you. My mother, if she was like that, I would throw myself from somewhere. If my mother had 2 children and had forgotten me as is your case, I would not have been in this world for a long time. A 25-year-old man who is the only child in the family tells you