Hello. I am 14 years old. I have a brother who soon turned 11. I have always guided him, I help him, I take care of him. Our parents are very ambitious, but they give us almost no time. For them, the evaluations are important - arts, etc. they are not interested, they consider it a complete waste of time. This year my brother entered my school (there is an admission after the fourth grade). He applied with great desire, he was happy. But everything has changed. I was also in 5th to 7th grade at this high school. At the entrance levels did not perform brilliantly. That's why stupid teachers put a label on him. They constantly compare him to me, how "I knew", how "you should be like your brother". It ruins it, I see it. After the first parent-teacher meeting, instead of reassuring him about these few bad grades, my parents shouted at him! Are these people, tell me ?? My brother, who is extremely intelligent now feels like a complete fool! I just hope he doesn't become an outsider in his new class.
Soon all this tension came to him more. As the whole family dined, my mother began to explain to him how to follow my example. "Your brother goes and wins math competitions, you go too!" WHAT NONSENSE? I myself do not see why she should follow some ideal she invented for a diligent child! He had tried several times, but races like these were not for him. Otherwise, he has a huge talent in writing short stories, but you know - it doesn't matter ... So when he told him how bad he was at school, he cried. It came to him a lot, really. And guess what they told him - my father was angry that he was "behaving like a woman", and my mother continued calmly. Then I got up and took him to our room. I'm tired of her, I don't care if they're my parents. He felt better without them. He told me how difficult it was for him to be compared to me. I feel bad about it. I explained to him that I never wanted this to happen, that he was actually very smart, and that I would ask my former teachers to stop comparing him to me.
For the first time in a month, he smiled. Since then, I have been helping him with the lessons every day, and little by little he is beginning to understand them. But ours continues. Please help me - what can I tell my parents to stop comparing him to me? and that I will ask my former teachers to stop comparing him to me. For the first time in a month, he smiled. Since then, I have been helping him with the lessons every day, and little by little he is beginning to understand them. But ours continues.
Please help me - what can I tell my parents to stop comparing him to me? and that I will ask my former teachers to stop comparing him to me. For the first time in a month, he smiled. Since then, I have been helping him with the lessons every day, and little by little he is beginning to understand them. But ours continues. Please help me - what can I tell my parents to stop comparing him to me?
Answers 13
Tell them exactly what you told us. How this comparison will not lead to anything good, but most of all make him experience complexes. It is very happy to have children like you ... It is very good that you take care of your brother like that. And to know that he appreciates it.
Good job son! There is a thought of Botev: "Brother does not feed his brother, but woe to him who does not have him!". If anyone is to blame for the situation, it's your parents and dumb teacher pieces. As I watch, you do your best to help your brother. Do not give up! Go out and firmly tell your parents what you think about it. Even if you are castrated, you will still show that you are beginning to become a man. Good luck. A 22-year-old boy
Good job son! congratulations! You care a lot about your brother and you love him very much, you understand him. This is commendable. As for the other, explain to them that if you were a mathematician, then he is a writer (I conclude from his gift for writing short stories). As a student myself, I loved to write. I even kept diaries all the time. Once he begins to understand the lessons, he will start to get better grades. eka show them to be calm. They are obviously worried about his future, but their approach is not right. Every child is unique and should not be compared to anyone else.
Say the same to your brother's teachers and your parents. It really shouldn't go on like this ... just because he had lower grades doesn't mean he's stupider than you or that Wings will have lower grades! Well done for realizing in time
You're a great boy, you're not really a Man anymore. I just wondered if your story wasn't made up. Thank you for making me smile. You have nothing to talk about with your parents, it is obvious that they have quite different views and are unlikely to get into a situation. Talk to his teachers, give him guidance. Be his mother and father, show him that it is not the grades that matter, but the knowledge and the personality. I would be happy if I had a brother like you. What a wonderful child you are. I wish you much success, both to you and to your little brother. Always love it and protect it this way, nowadays you are a flower among weeds. Bad
i don't think it's right for your parents to compare him to you after all no matter how much you are also a human being and you make mistakes you are hardly perfect in everything
If possible, talk to the school psychologist to talk to the parents, because sometimes such children make suicide attempts. It is right that you support your brother.
I was impressed - you have a wonderful attitude towards your brother and a very reasonable opinion on the subject. I think you should tell them in plain text not to compare you, because you are individuals and you have the right to develop in your own individual way. Always fight back when your parents or someone else starts comparing you, and they should stop. Also encourage your brother to participate in writing competitions, to express what he knows how to do, so that he can prove himself in his field and gain self-confidence that will not be related to you. Success! I loved it.
In my opinion, your parents don't think practically. It is true that up to 7th grade it is important to study to enter a good high school, but most of the subjects themselves are a huge waste of time and nerves. Physics, history, chemistry, biology, mathematics are full of unnecessary things. I can tell you from personal experience that in my specialties, nothing helped me from high school. What helped me was that I was learning some things outside of class. And especially if you go to a Bulgarian university and there is not much competition for high schools after 7th grade, there is no point in poisoning your nerves to study some crazy, meaningless material. And after 12th grade, they will take you to UNWE and Sofia without any problems, even with threes in everything. Honestly, I learned a lot more while playing computer games, because at least I improved my English skills. This could not be done by force in the teacher. The level of education in Bulgaria is so bad. Therefore, it is better for both of you to live your youth than to break your nerves and shorten your life. If you think that with good grades in school, you will open more chances for a university in Bulgaria, you are wrong. The best excellent student in my class is the same specialty as the weakest student at UNWE.
Thanks to everyone for the kind comments! I talked to his class on Friday, and she promised to talk to the other teachers. Then I explained to our people what my opinion was. Well, now I'm being punished because "it didn't work for me" and I "exposed my family." Not that I care. I hope they divert their attention from my brother to me. Apparently my parents will never change. Therefore, I will do as you advised me - I will guide and protect him as much as possible. Once again thank you!
Well done friend! Never give up! One day you and your brother will be alone in life. You have to help yourself. I have a brother 11 years older than me. Unfortunately, he is not like you - to protect his brother. But drive. So tell your parents that while they are harassing their son in this way (as I told your father what you are telling your brother, I'll just find him and drive him like a nail into yogurt - sorry for the expression) their son will stay such-invaluable. Sorry for the mistakes but I'm in a hurry and I'm on wire.
In my opinion, tell them that he is still a child and that he is more interested in the fact that they only quarrel over his grades and that there are children who are much worse than him. Not everyone is given math, English, etc.
What are these parents not to understand and not to listen to their children. If they do not listen to their problem, follow your path with your brother, support him and be his support in difficult moments. When you become an adult, if you can't stand it, you will find a job that you can combine with lectures, you will move out of it, you can take him with you, you will find him a job that combines learning or something seasonal and you will cope.