Hello! I came here by chance hoping to find something like a psychologist - a Google advisor :))) I guess it's funny, but sometimes I feel like I'm falling into a hole. I try to keep my thoughts awake, but it seems like at times I just sink without knowing where to go, what to do .... I will describe here briefly what bothers me and I hope you will be good and give me advice !! I am 24 years old and consider myself an active and active person. I have a profession, I graduated 2 universities ... I am engaged in public activities, etc. I have a relationship with a boy who soon returned from another country. Very intelligent, and it seemed to draw me to him. After we met, we realized that we had actually met before and even our loved ones had points of contact in the past. Of course I decided it was our destiny and we should be together, and he is convinced of this :)) Unfortunately we live in different cities because, he studies and I work and I am rarely seen. Honestly, I miss him, but in general I'm worried about something else ... I realized that he was very depressed before he came back here. When he returns, things get worse, along with family quarrels. Gradually I realized that he had a difficult childhood - along with school quarrels, etc. Then I realized that his father had a less positive influence in the family. It turned out that my friend had been taking sedatives for a year now and according to his doctor's prescription he had to drink them for another 1-2 years !!! In my opinion, it is difficult for him to express himself and to fight ... It is difficult for him to find the way and he is left to the easier option to take drugs that will make him sick and ... I am against these drugs, but in no way can I convince him of my rightness. I don't know how our relationship was born in between, but at times I feel quite worried. The night before, his father had caused a major scandal after getting drunk at home. I was a witness in part because we talked on Skype ... My friend hung up and disappeared (he turned off his phone, and that's all for me because I have no other contact, we're in different cities.) In the evening he called me very upset and he told me a lot of unpleasant things that happened systematically .... And today the family went to a psychologist and for a walk ... I don't know about me it's very confusing. It seems to me that he is too attached to his family and I don't know if I have the right to be annoyed, and I am annoyed .... I always thought that one should strive for independence, because otherwise it is a very busy environment. ... What should I do What to do? Please give me advice because I want to know if I'm wrong?
Answers 9
Out of sheer curiosity, I would like to know where do these higher educations distribute them? !? It was only at the age of 23 that I managed to get my university diploma, given that I was accepted as a student at the age of 19 (after the barracks). Come on, when we make up stories, let's think about them a little bit, eh !? !!
:) I graduated from the National Academy of Arts and completed both educations at the same time :))) Painting and pedagogy :)) This is an opportunity not to be missed and if you enter the website of the Academy you will see! It is difficult to be accepted there, but if you succeed you have many opportunities!
It may have occurred to you that he does not enjoy living with his family under constant stress, but if he has no other choice ... where to go?
What you describe happening to your boyfriend is not easy to fix. Unfortunately, in Bulgaria you are immediately given anti-depressant drugs, which often have terrible side effects. But what else to do? If I were a millionaire, I would send him on a mountain vacation in Switzerland for a year and forget what he went through and where he went. But at the moment, he probably won't even be able to rest without these drugs. I do not know. I'm not a doctor, I'm just thinking.
The bad thing is that young people are really dependent on their parents, which is a big problem, apart from the fact that parents are always interfering in their children's lives, ostensibly for good and literally hindering them, the fact that your friend is taking medication is not at all Well, I don't want to be a prophet, but if you love each other and you don't have the opportunity to separate independently, it can cost you the relationship, as often happens. Good luck to the author.
Yes, that's right ... I am convinced that without them you will not be able to relax! I'm just very angry that I can't give him the peace of mind or the support he needs in a way that can really help. He is a wonderful person and I suffer a lot from spinning in this circle. I understand that he is currently living with his parents because he wants to rest, but things are getting worse than before, because they also have their own experiences and do not pay attention to the other ...
I absolutely agree with number 3. Such situations are not uncommon. Many families have some internal problems and scandals. It is normal that such a situation does not affect people well. It's good that the boy is at least taking medication, because most people just put up with all this stress! * Syndrome
He's coming to see me today, and he'll probably prefer to break up. What to do...? I love him, I know that he loves me too and I don't want the difficulties to stop us ... What can I do to leave him?
Personally, if he has the opportunity (mostly financially), it is best to move out and go to live in an apartment, with a friend or something, as long as he is far from the place that works so badly for him. I had a similar problem, similar to my parents. Ever since I live apart from them, I have been reborn !!!