Hello, in short, I suffer a lot because of my painfully developed perfectionism. Can anyone give advice on how to deal with this problem? Recommend a book to read or something else. I will be grateful to you. :( Please administrators post this because I really need to share.
Answers 7
If you have the opportunity, consult a specialist, a good psychologist helped me a lot. The key is to understand that there are no perfect people, there is no way, because perfection is an illusion created to deceive and irritate people, to make them angry, to make them compete with each other. Sometimes you don't have to be better, the best, because you are already good enough ... Change the negative attitude with a positive one. Here is what I took out for you: Every day you make a choice what to see: - the positive qualities of people or their shortcomings; - what you miss or what you have; - disappointments or fulfilled wishes; - the obstacles that stand in your way, or the gifts of life; - the small details or the whole picture; - good or evil. Remember: nothing in this world is perfect, including you. But it is the combination of small flaws and the beauty of the whole that makes the world different, interesting, valuable. Really. Open your eyes. Open your heart. Life is wonderful!
Answer the question, why do you want everything to be perfect, where is this desire rooted, if it is not perfect, what will happen, does it make sense for everything to be perfect, nature is beautiful, but is everything perfect?
I am very impressed that you are asking for a book to read. That's how I started working on my emotional problems 5 years ago - through books. Then I went to psychotherapy. I can offer you two books: "Basic Forms of Fear" by Fritz Riemann - search for it on the Internet because it is exhausted; and Madeleine Algafari's "I Have Faith" - look it up in bookstores. These books are not entirely focused on perfectionism, but there is a lot on the subject in both.
This is not a disease state .. This is a good thing .. Almost all geniuses and successful people in life are perfectionists! And you should be glad that you think as such .. Everyone can do nothing and die like an idiot without achieving anything ..
It hurts me more than it helps. For example, cleaning 12 hours a day and even time for work not to leave you is not a good thing. I feel unhappy :(
And are you like that to yourself?
I am like that only to myself.