Skip to content
Family

Removal From Home (male)

By angry_bunny September 03, 2020 30 answers Last updated September 03, 2020

Hello, I am a 25-year-old man and I still do not live alone. Before I start with my warnings, I will share why my current situation is like this. Many times for a long time it has occurred to me to move out on my own, but after a lot of thinking, the bills don't work out. I live in a big city with my father and grandmother. My mother died when I was 4. I get a relatively good salary and I have always made up my mind when it comes to money and my future actions. As you know, everyone always says that we have to move out and live alone and I personally do not feel very ok as a man of 25 to live with us. But quite often people who give such advice do not take into account many factors. Well, I don't have a hereditary home, my only option is to go out. I haven't met a serious girl, so that I can go out with her and that's why I have to be alone .... According to my accounts in the city where I live (Plovdiv) for a single person to live normally in a dormitory, the minimum is about 1300 net monthly income. This is an absolute minimum if everything goes according to plan. In general, I take a little more, which would be considered a good income in my city, but I do not feel comfortable to be at a minimum. For now, however, this is the max I can achieve. My current situation is that I live with my father and grandmother (as I mentioned earlier) and of course I help financially. I cover about half of the household expenses and all my expenses, which I consider adequate, especially since I don't have a mother and I get a higher salary than my father. I need to live independently, but I am divided between two decisions: _Loving with us and being able to help them live a calmer life, at least until I catch a serious friend with whom I can eventually move out Or - to move out on my own, not being able to help our financially, not being able to save anything and living month by month Of course, household chores are also a factor. I have to do it myself after work without anyone to share them with. Let me mention that I don't have a roommate. All my friends in those more years don't even consider taking them out. I would be grateful for advice from personal experience and real examples. All my friends in those more years don't even consider taking them out. I would be grateful for advice from personal experience and real examples. All my friends in those more years don't even consider taking them out. I would be grateful for advice from personal experience and real examples.

Answers 30

1
hiroki.sakai_19 answered · September 03, 2020

   Brother, every second sentence you shout that there is no one to share expenses with - sorry but it's disgusting, no one owes you, it's hard for the one who will catch up with you, because this will not be a relationship, but a financial income

2
lannakoffi answered · September 03, 2020

   First, "ours" - there is no such word, there is - "ours" - this mistake is very annoying. Regarding the problem - I was faced with this dilemma years ago, with the difference that I do not know how I would deal with the bills at all. My mother just said - I do not want you to live with us, get well. I had no help from anywhere, a salary of about 500 leva net, my father and mother did not help me with anything, and I stayed with us. My mother deliberately made my life miserable, just to get away. He even told me that he would make my life "black" while I moved to Bulgaria. And I moved out and my friend supported me, I only paid my food and some bills. And those who are "independent" - mom and dad buy a house, pay bills, give jars, and children are beaten in the chest that they live alone. You are independent ONLY when you hear yours just by asking how you are. The other is addiction. Tip: raise money, look for more income and move out on time. Your life will become hell in time. He sits away from his parents. No one dug into mom's skirt, and in your case, grandma and dad. It sounds cruel, but it's true. I hope you are not convinced in a difficult way. There is no happy family living next to parents. There is no!!!

3
fifa answered · September 03, 2020

   In Plovdiv the prices of the rooms are very expensive. When you add the consumables, especially in the winter, you will sob that yours are next to you because they are used to your help. My advice is to find a mate and move out together. Staying in your hometown just so people don't tell you that you live with yours is nonsense. At least, the rooms are uncomfortable, old furniture, worn mattresses. Stay with you and save and most importantly - look around for a girl!

4
leahcapelle answered · September 03, 2020

   First look for affordable accommodation. Just look you find something at a great price. Second, to do the housework alone is not scary. Yes, your grandmother cooked and cleaned, but believe me, you have gathered 3 generations. How do you invite a girl for sex for example. Yes, it's easy for you at home now, but it's crippling. Go your own way.

5
caryelwes answered · September 03, 2020

   There is no way 1300 can be your minimum in Plovdiv. You go out to an apartment, but you take a room, not an entire apartment to expand. And I'm 25, but I've been living alone since I was 14 years old. Needless to say, how many rooms have I changed and how many people have I lived with, including foreigners. There is no way if you want to be independent you go out and think for him on the go. It is true that I have had moments that made me end my life. I'm serious, I haven't had money for weeks, but only I know how I managed. In the end, however, things work out. Go to the apartment, and everything else will be fine. Women will not take you very seriously if you still live with yours. The other plus is that you start to rely only on yourself, and that can only help you. The bills don't come out because you don't think right.

6
catalina_099 answered · September 03, 2020

   At 25, and it says "our"! ??

7
joanne_hudson answered · September 04, 2020

   Get out no matter how difficult it will be in the beginning. Housework should not scare you - it is not nuclear physics to cook and clean. Anyone can handle this. For the record - I have been in Sofia for 8 years and in the beginning I barely had enough money for bread and pate. I ate this for a whole month. Now I can afford things I never even dreamed of - vacations abroad, expensive food, bags, clothes ... I have long since exceeded the standard that my parents had. This would not have happened if I had not separated from them and moved to Sofia. My friends who stayed in my hometown are married with children, unemployed, huddled together for two generations and relying on their parents. As difficult as it is for you, try not to feel guilty about your grandmother and father, as well as the duty to help them financially. They get as much as they earn. Imagine your future family - wife, children, own home ... Your grandmother and father took care of you, you in turn have to take care of your own family. I guess they won't be happy with your decision and will start manipulating you to feel guilty that you want to live your own life by hinting at what they did for you, how they can't do without you or you can't do without them, but don't give up. It's weird that you call them ours - that's the name of mother and father, not grandmother and father. It is also strange that your father has not found another woman in 14 years, but instead lives with his mother. It's as if they have formed a family and you are their child and you are finishing the picture. This is not normal and it seems to me that there is something rotten in their relationship so run away while it's time. Don't stay single for the rest of your life. children, your own home ... Your grandmother and father took care of you, you in turn have to take care of your own family. I guess they won't be happy with your decision and will start manipulating you to feel guilty that you want to live your own life by hinting at what they did for you, how they can't do without you or you can't do without them, but don't give up. It's weird that you call them ours - that's the name of mother and father, not grandmother and father. It is also strange that your father has not found another woman in 14 years, but instead lives with his mother. It's as if they have formed a family and you are their child and you are finishing the picture. This is not normal and it seems to me that there is something rotten in their relationship so run away while it's time. Don't stay single for the rest of your life. children, your own home ... Your grandmother and father took care of you, you in turn have to take care of your own family. I guess they won't be happy with your decision and will start manipulating you to feel guilty that you want to live your own life by hinting at what they did for you, how they can't do without you or you can't do without them, but don't give up. It's weird that you call them ours - that's the name of mother and father, not grandmother and father. It is also strange that your father has not found another woman in 14 years, but instead lives with his mother. It's as if they have formed a family and you are their child and you are finishing the picture. This is not normal and it seems to me that there is something rotten in their relationship so run away while it's time. Don't stay single for the rest of your life. you in turn have to take care of your own family. I guess they won't be happy with your decision and will start manipulating you to feel guilty that you want to live your own life by hinting at what they did for you, how they can't do without you or you can't do without them, but don't give up. It's weird that you call them ours - that's the name of mother and father, not grandmother and father. It is also strange that your father has not found another woman in 14 years, but instead lives with his mother. It's as if they have formed a family and you are their child and you are finishing the picture. This is not normal and it seems to me that there is something rotten in their relationship so run away while it's time. Don't stay single for the rest of your life. you in turn have to take care of your own family. I guess they won't be happy with your decision and will start manipulating you to feel guilty that you want to live your own life by hinting at what they did for you, how they can't do without you or you can't do without them, but don't give up. It's weird that you call them ours - that's the name of mother and father, not grandmother and father. It is also strange that your father has not found another woman in 14 years, but instead lives with his mother. It's as if they have formed a family and you are their child and you are finishing the picture. This is not normal and it seems to me that there is something rotten in their relationship so run away while it's time. Don't stay single for the rest of your life. that they will not be happy with your decision and will start manipulating you to feel guilty, that you want to live your own life by hinting at what they did for you, how they can't do without you or you can't do without them, but you can't give in. It's weird that you call them ours - that's the name of mother and father, not grandmother and father. It is also strange that your father has not found another woman in 14 years, but instead lives with his mother. It's as if they have formed a family and you are their child and you are finishing the picture. This is not normal and it seems to me that there is something rotten in their relationship so run away while it's time. Don't stay single for the rest of your life. that they will not be happy with your decision and will start manipulating you to feel guilty, that you want to live your own life by hinting at what they did for you, how they can't do without you or you can't do without them, but you can't give in. It's weird that you call them ours - that's the name of mother and father, not grandmother and father. It is also strange that your father has not found another woman in 14 years, but instead lives with his mother. It's as if they have formed a family and you are their child and you are finishing the picture. This is not normal and it seems to me that there is something rotten in their relationship so run away while it's time. Don't stay single for the rest of your life. that you call them ours - that's what it's called to mother and father, not to grandmother and father. It is also strange that your father has not found another woman in 14 years, but instead lives with his mother. It's as if they have formed a family and you are their child and you are finishing the picture. This is not normal and it seems to me that there is something rotten in their relationship so run away while it's time. Don't stay single for the rest of your life. that you call them ours - that's what it's called to mother and father, not to grandmother and father. It is also strange that your father has not found another woman in 14 years, but instead lives with his mother. It's as if they have formed a family and you are their child and you are finishing the picture. This is not normal and it seems to me that there is something rotten in their relationship so run away while it's time. Don't stay single for the rest of your life.

8
basagka69xx answered · September 04, 2020

   The earlier you take it out, the better. I also lived with my father and grandmother. I was 18 when I left them, now I'm 22. Don't talk about your girlfriend. Young and old do not go together. There is nothing better than being individual.

9
keesbuijtelaar answered · September 04, 2020

   What is it like to live in a dormitory? A man himself, as far as I understand, reading between the lines, with a not very active social life ... You have a father and a grandmother who, I suppose, do not cause you problems. You don't have a friend, you won't have one, if the idea is to "catch" her, in a word - apart from watching TV alone, what is your accommodation for? You better give these 400 leva rent to your grandmother, the woman will spend them for something useful.

10
airbus answered · September 05, 2020

   You can live in an apartment with another person, you do not need to know him in advance. I went out like that at almost 24. It's not the most comfortable, but you'll have to do it someday. Better now that you're ripe.

11
daytonflyers answered · September 05, 2020

   Definitely - get out! I left home at 19 and it was the right decision in my life. I am now 32 and I see acquaintances and friends my age who have stayed to live with their parents (including my sister). Well, they are like children. I can't call them men and women. It's just that a person changes his thinking a lot. Taking care of your father and grandmother is not your responsibility - they are elderly people. If you can't afford to live alone, find roommates. You say you don't have friends looking for accommodation, but you can find strangers. It's not that scary, that's how I lived with mine. You meet once, you talk, you judge whether they are understood and whether you will like each other and you adjust over time. It's nice if you make friends over time, but it's not mandatory. It is important to have mutual respect and esteem for privacy. And if it turns out that you don't like it at all, it's easy to change accommodation. And another thing - without getting angry, living with yours can turn away many opportunities for a potential partner. I tried to go out with a woman my age who lived with her mother - well, there's no way. It was as if I had adopted her. How do you imagine - a third date, you take the girl to your house and introduce her to your grandmother. As much as one loves and respects one's family, one must take one's own path.

12
luisa_simpson answered · September 05, 2020

   In my opinion, if you don't have to and you feel comfortable at home, there is no point in going out. I also went that route. I could have moved out at 25, but I had to give myself almost all the money I made and decided it didn't make sense. Then I started earning well, but I decided to wait and buy my own property. I didn't have a serious girlfriend anyway. Now I have my own house and no loans weigh on me.

13
oliviabresffy answered · September 06, 2020

   Very topical topic, well done to the author for the analysis. In my opinion, finances are not the problem, because we live in Plovdiv with BGN 1,300, I am my wife and a small child, rather you are not psychologically ready to move out (you are used to it, easier you, etc.) Given that you do not have a girlfriend, it is more rational to stay with yours and try to save a certain amount. It is true that women are extremely impressed by this, but for me personally it is more -practically.

14
phatazzbabygirl answered · September 06, 2020

   From the author: I expected real advice, not to pretend to be Bulgarian teachers. You don't realize how unfortunate it is to be picky about a single word. There is no one here to say goodbye to grammar. To return to the topic. I don't want to catch a girlfriend to share accounts with her, but I think it's perfectly normal for her to contribute to the general accounts if she lives with me. I have never been attracted to women who cannot take responsibility. I hope to meet such a woman. Also, 1300 per month for a single person in Plovdiv is a normal expense just in case you don't throw yourself away. Your rent is the lowest cost, you have many others. I admit that I am uncomfortable talking about this topic with a woman and I am somewhat ashamed, but at the same time why should I take seriously a woman who lives with theirs, until a man takes her to him? Why should a man be ashamed of the fact that he did not go out alone, and a woman not? This is not about the two living with the man's family. I'm not saying it's normal, but I hardly know a person who has gone out alone in his own city. My question was different, and you simplified it to some pathetic level. As I stated at the beginning of the topic, I want and currently help my family a lot financially and in any other way, although I never asked for money from them, even when I was little. In case I went out, this would be impossible. I have to choose between me and them. But even then, I will be a hair's breadth every month, unlike now. As for looking for a higher income, I think I'm doing pretty well for my age and although finding something better is very difficult at this stage, I have not stopped searching and developing as much as I can. In this endeavor I have always been alone again, no one has found me a job or guided me in life. I wrote the above because you associate too much living alone in a dormitory with who a person is and whether he is capable of taking responsibility. Currently, the difference is that part of this responsibility is shared as in any normal family. The topic is based on my current situation and obligations to my family, not what may happen in the future. My hair was directed at those who had gone through these obstacles, as there was no one to ask. Obviously I have no friends my age to live alone, my father has never lived alone, I have no mother, and the older generation of them is even worse, they got married and relied on help and grew up in the villages.

15
charlotte_me answered · September 06, 2020

   Again from the author: Still, thank you to those who gave their advice. No, I'm not looking and I've never looked for the easier. I am looking for a better solution for myself in view of my situation. If I could get to him alone, I wouldn't be writing here

16
soloporteros answered · September 07, 2020

   As with everything, he weighed the pros and cons of the venture, the consequences of them, and came to a conclusion. We cannot do it for you because there are subjective factors that you are aware of. For me, the main reason for moving out of the house was an unbearable neighbor. Strange as it may seem. Then I was 17 years old, I agreed with our people to find a job and support myself, and she would provide me with their apartment near their house. Then the main reason I got out of there and went to the lodge was that they didn't let pets in, and I found a dog and a kitten in a week. However, I did not have the factor that they needed my financial support. They have made money and probably have it until the end of their days. But they have always adhered to the principle that when I'm not in their home - to take care of myself. If I can't handle myself, to return, but according to their habits and rules. For me, too, the question of living on the minimum or living in affluence has never been present. For me to live with 2 and 200 is a normal circumstance in Bulgaria. My whole environment is on this principle. Sometimes you are at a minimum, other times you wonder where to put the money. I was not intimidated by the thought of eating beans for a whole month or eating dry bread for days. I hadn't thought about housekeeping at all. And when it happened to me - I quickly learned how much can be delayed; which is unpleasant to abandon and which is subject to delay in case of great fatigue. You get in rhythm whether you want to or not. For me, the main factor for every move so far has been to feel good. If you see more disadvantages in moving out, what the hell are you going to do about it? Don't live for human opinion, seek your own happiness. PP But otherwise - in principle, I, as a free woman looking for a partner - would be very disappointed if I found out that you live with yours, and you have the opportunity to move out. But I can't explain exactly why. In principle, it would be easier to decide to come to me and not have to move luggage in such a case, but I do not think I would take such a step with you. In the meantime, however, I am not happy when someone has already bought a property (more often on credit), because then it seems that I have no choice whether to live with him or not and it goes without saying that we will be there ... In principle, it would be easier to decide to come to me and not have to move luggage in such a case, but I do not think I would take such a step with you. In the meantime, however, I am not happy when someone has already bought a property (more often on credit), because then it seems that I have no choice whether to live with him or not and it goes without saying that we will be there ... In principle, it would be easier to decide to come to me and not have to move luggage in such a case, but I do not think I would take such a step with you. In the meantime, however, I am not happy when someone has already bought a property (more often on credit), because then it seems that I have no choice whether to live with him or not and it goes without saying that we will be there ...

17
gennelivie answered · September 07, 2020

   Author, the problem is not the wrong word, but when you write it is sometimes difficult to understand. Look, "I've never been attracted to women who can't take responsibility. I hope I'm about to meet such a woman." So what kind of woman do you hope to meet? With one that cannot be held responsible ??? The other thing I want to tell you is that a man can take a woman who has lived with them, because she will not take care of them financially and physically and there is no dilemma "I have to choose between me and them". While with you and all men living with their adults, if you reunite with a woman and yours complain that it is difficult for them, they will easily arouse the dilemma in you again, but then the dilemma will be who to listen to "Woman or Grandma" or for what to spend money " The man is such an emotional structure that needs to take care of someone, it does not matter to him whether he will take care of mom, grandma, dad, grandpa, wife, child. While this is not the case with women, they are more easily detached and as soon as they give birth their whole being is given to the baby. For a woman who has given birth, there is no more important person on earth than her baby, and she will never have a dilemma in herself as to which one to choose the needs of the child or the needs of her grandmother, she will not even think of helping her grandmother. her child is not provided with everything. While a man who is not emotionally separated from his relatives will take to thinking who has a greater and more important need, his child, or his grandmother and of course will come to the logic that life-sustaining blood drugs for his grandmother are more important and his child's vitamins, which can be postponed until the next salary with which his wife will not agree or be satisfied. Yes, the real truth is that the child will live without vitamins, and the grandmother without blood drugs is unknown, but a man must learn to be further from his grandmother's problems and closer to his wife's problems to have a happy family. .

18
mingxia answered · September 07, 2020

   I'm number 7 again. You should not have a dilemma whether to help them or to look after yourself. You are the important one - move out to become independent, or they will always pull you back. Many people persuade them to stay with their parents while they raise money. How many of them do you know have collected. It starts - give for bills, give for food, give for repairs and in the end you can't move out for 10 years. Your grandmother and father are not your responsibility. Have you heard that a cow should not suckle from a calf? Read your weaknesses of Urine Dyer and you will find the answer to many of your questions and the courage to act.

19
iwantcock_2020 answered · September 07, 2020

   We don't pretend to be teachers in Bulgarian! We draw conclusions about who you are when you use teenage jargon in those years! And we decided not to waste our advice! Your last post proves it!

20
classybougierachet answered · September 08, 2020

   You post, if necessary on Facebook, that you are looking for a roommate or two, some students for example. There are many students from all over Bulgaria in Plovdiv. I think 100 percent will respond to you. Just look for some student topics for rooms and roommates in Plovdiv. They will respond to you, because they are much more in need of cheap accommodation, do you remember :) Along with your roommates, you may have the opportunity to meet new people, and why not a girl. Don't be tied to critical comments here. As long as you analyze, act.

21
madukes8384 answered · September 08, 2020

   Hello, until 30 years ago, people lived with their parents all their lives (the majority). Not only are there no fewer men and women, but on the contrary. Today's youth is at times more restless. Do not feel ashamed and guilty that you live with your parents. Live as you would be happier. It doesn't matter that you live with them. Be yourself, be healthy and happy!

22
best_box.kz answered · September 08, 2020

   GET OUT !! Give the money you will give for accommodation (eg BGN 500) to pay for a house that will eventually become yours. Yes, it will be difficult for you, but you know that you are investing in something safe that will remain for your children. I'm a boy of 27. Like you, I lived with my parents until 1 year ago, I'm from a small town. I got a relatively high salary there (1000-1200), but I gave more of my money to my parents, I supported them. And so until last year, when I did not start repaying a loan for an apartment. I don't give money to my parents right now; the money I have to give for accommodation, I give for the loan. It is difficult, but it will not always be so. Set aside money and don't think much about it for a few months, with or without a girlfriend, move away from your parents so that you can leave a hereditary home to your children in time.

23
ilovemybooos answered · September 08, 2020

   The idea of ​​†‹вЂ‹ a home loan is the worst possible. In those years, to earn a loan for at least 15 years, which automatically means not to change jobs during that time, even if you want to, not to change the city or the state. And in the end for what purpose? So that your children can live with you until you die and leave it to them?

24
nmmp123 answered · September 08, 2020

   Author, it is complete nonsense to leave you if you don't have to. By necessity I mean having a serious girlfriend or being in conflict with your family. You do not have such factors. As you said yourself, almost no one goes to their own city just like that. Yes, there are those who have moved out and live in the same city, but in 99% of cases it is their own property. To leave you just like that, because someone else did, is nonsense.

25
presidencebenin answered · September 09, 2020

   Don't export for now. You better save some money and get an apartment on credit. You can rent it out for the first few years until you get a foothold. I have been living in a dormitory alone for 14 years, ie since I became a student. If I were in your situation I would not pay rents, direct mortgage.

26
alektra_star answered · September 09, 2020

   No nonsense is the loan, but the best possible solution. If you can't handle the installments or you decide to change the city, you just rent it out and it pays for itself.

27
julievermeire answered · September 09, 2020

   Number 23, I turned around when I read your opinion - why does taking a loan automatically mean not changing jobs for 15 years? And the city and the state ??? Of course, you will change your job when you find a better paid or promising one, what stops you? It is not a problem to change the city or the state - it is easiest then to rent the house and pay it off only - many people do it, what are these rigid notions that a mortgage loan means not moving anywhere.

28
rosasweet02 answered · September 09, 2020

   If you listen to them not to go out - grandma and dad will always weigh you financially and you will never raise money. It's good that you don't have a mother, but why didn't your father find another one and live with his mother instead? The best thing for a young person is to go out and take care of himself when he turns 18. The boyfriend will come too. Be brave and do not listen to people who are crowded for three generations in one apartment to enslave relatives instead of the bank. We are very limited. History shows that whoever stuffed their money under the pillow or on deposit simply devalued their money. Better on a mortgage and in your apartment from day 1 than to hide and in the end it turns out that the square has gone up from 500 to 1000 euros, as it is in Sofia at the moment, and you can't buy anything. I personally pay the mortgage and only until I hear you, that you live with your grandmother and father and you feel obligated to help them, and I will run away. Usually such people are burdened - toxic relatives, who subsequently harass with intrigue and manipulation, you yourself are enslaved to guilt and duty, you are not able to break away and take responsibility for your own family. You were watched, in turn you had to watch your children. Otherwise the circuit closes ...

29
makarena18 answered · September 09, 2020

   Към 28 от автора. Не ми тежат финансово и в момента успявам да помагам на тях и да спестявам прилична сума всеки месец. Това е и цялата делема. Това е сегашното ми положение. Става въпрос че все пак имам желание да се изнесат и съм наясно че ако го направя няма да съм им от финансоа помощ, но по мои сметки няма да във финансова помощ и за себе си, тъй като с доходите ми, които споменах по-горе ще съм на границата всеки месец да не говорим за спестяване. Към всички останали, искам да уточня че не става въпрос за изпитване на някакъв дълг, за привързаност или подобни, а за избиране на по-практичният вариант предвид сегашното ми положение на необвързан и сегашният ми доход. Също така нямам особено добри отношения с родителите си и никога не съм имал, но все пак си ми остават семейство. Финансово биха се справили достатъчно добре и без мен. Аз финансово никога не съм бил напълно зависим от тях. Единствено до толкова, че разходите ни за домакинството са били споделени. Разходите свързани с мен съм ги покривал аз от съвсем малък. Разбира се че в случая играе роля и финансовата страна и моралната страна. Но цялата тема е с цел да наблегна на финансовата част и справянето сам що се касае до време, енергия също. От морална гледна точка не търся съвети предвид в каква деградация се намира обществото ни.

30
goddessbaby021 answered · September 10, 2020

   28, this is complete nonsense! My parents (God bless them) got married late and they both retired when I was 16. Besides, they were never rich and all their money went to food. However, they always gave kindness to me and tried to be well. Basically, I was able to move out about a year and a half after I finished and started working and let them take care of themselves. I didn't do it, but that doesn't stop me from currently having a detached house with a yard and a fairly stable career. It doesn't matter where a person lives, it matters how responsible and serious he is.