Hello. I share my story because I really need opinions and help in the situation I am in. I am a man of about 40 years of age and despite my life experience I am in a situation to choose the safe or to take risks. I had a 3 year relationship with a girl from whom I came out very hurt. I won't go into details, but I was used to money, an awful lot of money for every standard. After this scald in my life, it is very difficult to trust a woman again. Don't think that I am a commercial type who thinks only about money and ambitions, I always thought that in order to be truly happy, one must have everything. After this incident I did not let anyone near me for 4 years. Six months ago, I renewed my friendship with the best friend of the girl X, from whom I was injured. Fate had decided to meet me with her, and we saw each other as friends without either of us thinking of anything more. I was surprised that a 26-year-old girl had the mindset of a 40-year-old woman and was struggling with life to achieve something and most importantly she knew what she wanted from life plus a good heart.
He was graduating with a master's degree and at the same time making plans for his own business. After daily conversations and acquaintances, she told me that she feels something more towards me and wants us to be together as a couple, because I have built trust in her and she knows how much I was hurt before and she herself only came across men who took advantage. from her. I replied that I also have sympathy for her, but it is difficult for me to admit someone to me, because I pursue goals and I am about to achieve them. I add that I live abroad and she is in Bulgaria. Summer, the business idea she had failed and she was left with a loan to a non-banking institution in the amount of BGN 10,000. I also helped with one or two installments for the loan, because I saw that it was difficult for her and her entire salary went to the loan, which amounted to BGN 1,000 per month. I myself could not postpone my things and I said that I did not want her to rely on me but to rely mainly on herself, because we have no connection and no one owes anyone. Whereupon she replied that it was stupid for some money not to start a relationship and that she herself wanted a person in her life with whom to help and build something. I am about to return to Bulgaria in 25 days and we are currently looking for an option how to fix this loan faster so that we can be together.
She works and lives and the only option to get together in my home is to fix this loan first, because I do not want to live in Sofia for rent, given that I have my own home that I acquired completely on my own. I also told her that we both had to give up some things if we wanted a good life. I emphasize that there has never been intimacy between us and a completely friendly relationship and that is exactly what she wants us to build a future together. The positive things I see in her - ambitious, knows what she wants, good, educated and has shown that she thinks about me. Appearance has long been a criterion for me, because I realized that the beautiful apples are rotten inside. The negatives that made me back off - she relies too much on me, maybe because she grew up without a father's support. The age limit is 15 years, which over time will have an impact on starting a family. I tried twice to tell her her address to which to send her something but I received a silent answer and I told her that trust is not built and everyone can want to be my friend. She got very angry with me and told me that I had offended her a lot by thinking of her that way. Should I risk arranging half of her loan and the other half of her by selling her car and being together or breaking off contact? I apologize, if there are spelling mistakes for 7 years I do not live in Bulgaria.
Answers 26
Hello! It says a 26-year-old girl. In the way he described the girl, I think he uses you for money. It's just that the tact with which she acts does not allow you to see the similarity in this respect with your ex-girlfriend. She used the opportunity to find someone to pay off her loan. You are not boyfriends, family or lovers. As far as I understand, it was not even a question of ever returning your money. Even so, she wouldn't give them back to you. Maybe she's hiding her address so you don't ever look for her for money. If the girl is smart, be careful because of that. It is not wise for me to do my own business that fails and then someone else pays the loan. You are quite naive towards women. Step away from your ex's acquaintances, she and the people around her are obviously finding a way for someone else to pay for them.
It's not true how naive you are, then women were materialistic hahahaha. Understand that no one takes anything from you or uses you, they just accept what you give / give yourself and you may think that you will buy gratitude .... Do what you know.
Cathy is a friend of your ex, she knows about your financial opportunities and wants to take advantage. She plays in front of you as an adult, so that you can trust her, you will fix her bucks, and you will not even be intimate with her, because she will have already lost you. Stop all contact with her so that you are not hurt five times, do not trust anyone and do not be naive.
This one only uses you. You say she's a friend of the other one who used you. She knows how you bonded with your friend and she thinks the number will work for her too. And I don't believe he'll sell his car. He will ask for all the money for the loan from you. Women are like that. You say that you have lost trust in women, and now you are attached to the most inappropriate one.
Man, why do you step on the same hoe twice? This is a scheme! Break, disappear. She milks you for money, this can be seen from a helicopter !!! She does not give an address - in order for her to be undetectable, you will pay her the loan and she will disappear - I guarantee you that. Can you be so naive at 40 ?! You can't build a relationship with a person you don't know well, with whom you haven't had sex, etc. She's a friend of the one you forgot !!! Then they will laugh at you together. I was dumbfounded by your stupidity. Tighten up!
Brother, you're 40, and you're more naive than a teenager. This is not a reproach, but a call to come to your senses. You are a good person, but you do not recognize who deserves to show your good side. This one is hardly one of them.
It really sounds like she is ready for anything just to help her with the loan and then ...
40 years is not small. You are an old man and you behave like a child. Complete ignore this user! And not a penny more for her! A man with opportunities, but he is attached to some k ... i. Brother, tighten up!
If he doesn't give you his address, then he lives with another man there. Don't get attached to her lies and stop giving her money. Stop giving money to women at all. She took the loan, she paid it. Moreover, there is probably another man next to her. Look for a woman with whom you have a smaller age difference. Even if it is already materially stable. This one watched you pour money on your ex and decided to repeat her trick. Don't be naive.
There is simply nothing to add to the above comments, only that seven years abroad is no excuse for your illiteracy. If we say his fuck on spelling, you are illiterate in life as well, and the "bitches" smell the illiterates very well and milk them until their knees soften. Man, the puzzle is in front of you, you just have to arrange it and the picture will light up. A 26-year-old girl graduating with a master's degree - if she really was so smart, assertive, ambitious, a master's degree would have been a fact 2 years ago. Again, for the same reasons, she would never take a loan from a non-banking institution in such an amount. Again, for the same reasons, she would not maintain a car - she would sew it and pay off at least some of the nonsense, not mutter to someone for money. I guess you heard the story. " you will immediately see the running boars - such prostitutes are more expensive than the standard ones. I hope you listen to the advice given to you before me, and if you still have free funds, it is better to help the forum - at least it will make sense, rather than pouring water into a bottomless bucket!
I am a woman, this job is not clean for her. As a woman who has had her own business since the age of 19, I deal with serous things on my own from an early age and I have often had relationships with older men, I can say that they use. I've never taken money from a boyfriend! Ambitious and smart women manage without taking advantage of the men we value and want in our lives! Deny her, let her find a solution on her own, and then get together. If her only goal is money, she will cut you off after you refuse. Get out delicately. Test me. Surprisingly, you come home, call her from the airport and say, "I'm in the cab, give me the address, I'm coming to see you!" I think she's living with another man who doesn't know you exist. Unfortunately, it will probably turn out to be a big farce and a game in which you are unpleasantly played. We are not all like that! Do not give up! Just looking for a wife,
Oh, I've been abroad not 7, but 27 years. Where I am, BGN 5,000 is a salary slightly above the minimum, in the sense that it is not a lot of money. But of course this is not the subject of discussion. The author seems to me a very confused man, perhaps due to the lack of a wife ... he knows best. But in my opinion, problems that are not solved with money, he somehow neither locates nor is able to overcome. Correct me, if I am wrong...
Number 10 you have a very sharp tongue. Looking at your spelling is not 100% correct. Because I am illiterate, we can meet and talk in 5-6 languages that you dream of learning. Once again, I come across people who think more about the spelling of others. And you all know you're wrong with your life experience. We fixed the girl's problem and now she is sending money to my family to help me and is waiting for me to go home. She was never with me for the money, there was simply no one to help her with the expenses until she got better and got back on her feet. Number 12 I wonder at 19 years old how you had your own business from mom and dad.
Author: Zubrachi, zubrachi, apart from sitting all day and measuring people's spelling mistakes, I have no words for anything else. Especially for number 10, I would be happy to meet you and close your mouth on any topic.
From number 12 I'm glad we're wrong! My business is not from mom and dad. I took a student loan. I paid for it myself, no one gave me a button.
* As all commentators are wrong, why in the section "love and infidelity" you wrote 1, 2 more topics about your same problem? * All the comments are very true, but you are a "horse with lids" sir. * "To some the Lord has given much, to others nothing," so it is with you, without offending. * Keep being naive, after 40 there is no one to take you because you have a heart, but they will "want" you because of the wallet in your pocket. You don't surprise me, because I personally know people like you, and one of them is even a virgin for over 30 years. -Maryan
Even if she doesn't want to use you - she is forced by the circumstances, she has no one to rely on. Look at it this way: there are many desperate people who will gladly take an outstretched hand for help, and this is not a typical use, but a real survival. One thing is for sure - she feels trust, gratitude, admiration and from there certainly something more.
Author, I'm number 10 - you read selectively, more precisely you have not learned to sift through useful information and ignore unnecessary. I'm far from apologizing or apologizing to you - you apologized for your spelling, I just noted it without hinting at it and without saying that's why you're alone at 40. I understand and your resentment towards the "toothpicks", but this is another topic, and it may be exactly on the topic, but it is unnecessary to comment on it at the moment. I will tell you once again in good faith - a man of 40, who is considered to have achieved something in life, succeeded in the goals he has set, gathers with his peers, and does not rub his hips in front of girls of 26 who are just entering life and naturally move at the slightest resistance. Unfortunately (yours and mine) the terms of the site are as follows, that there is no way we can meet and show me your muscular brain, the only thing we can talk about here, but we won't go back years with a chatter. I do not speak 5 languages, but only 3, but if your knowledge of foreign languages is at the level of mother tongue, we feel sorry for our mother. I don't know what huge incomes you have and at the cost of what you have, I only know that mine are enough for me, I can afford almost everything, but most of all I have managed to raise my two children and I don't feel the need to commit to "pickle" my daughter's age. If necessary, I help financially not one person, but never because someone has pushed himself with loans and now wonders where to get others to fix the first. I hope you already understand why I told you that your grammar will swallow it, but the other illiteracy is a little puzzling to me - think about yourself, you're already 40, and you still think that you will create a stable relationship, family and children by pouring water into buckets. In conclusion I will say (again in good faith) - I do not know if you want to be like me, but I definitely do not want to be like you, not that it is bad to learn 2 more languages, but I do not need, I get along with my children and to one. I wish you success in your search for love, keep believing that money can buy it - I, the "toothpick" believe in other things, but you are on the other side of the barrier and there is no way to understand me. but I definitely don't want to be like you, not that it's bad to learn 2 more languages, but I don't need them, I get along with my children in one. I wish you success in your search for love, keep believing that money can buy it - I, the "toothpick" believe in other things, but you are on the other side of the barrier and there is no way to understand me. but I definitely don't want to be like you, not that it's bad to learn 2 more languages, but I don't need them, I get along with my children in one. I wish you success in your search for love, keep believing that money can buy it - I, the "toothpick" believe in other things, but you are on the other side of the barrier and there is no way to understand me.
I'm sorry to say this, but in order to have a relationship with a woman, is one of your conditions to be 25-26 years old? Because obviously you only stagger on such. And these two girls are not successful and fighting girls, but some ready-made girls, baked lies. And you really are a naive person! Drop her - and if you succeed, look for a SUCCESSFUL or at least a good woman. And I don't mind the age difference, but I hope as a 40-year-old you look at 40-year-old women, not just 20-year-old girls, because it just doesn't suit you. Julian
Author, I also don't see you as a successful man. At least if you had succeeded, you wouldn't be tied to everything that some anonymous people write to you. Good luck with the girl, but don't expect much, because it seems to me that she perceives you as something temporary, not as a partner. I understand that you want a young and beautiful woman, but do not make illusions.
The author wrote that he was around 40, which could mean 49 years of deduction from his way of speaking.
Always take risks, always!
20 Juliane - at the age of 25-6 I have been staggering since my beard grew and I will stagger until it stops growing.
Well, 24 (author) will pull you out like that and even without letting you go, it is obvious that you are not wanted for the second one.
My author, then why are you writing here for advice? You don't like our experience, you don't like what we tell you - ok, well, it's your job. But you are the one who let a small muffin milk him, now you are following the exact same path, there is simply nothing else to tell you. I don't know how serious your current chick is, but to take out 10 vouchers for a quick loan, where you will repay 15 in one year and do it to do business, then fail it for a few months, then yell at someone else to fix it. the buckets ... This is a recipe for a new catastrophe. You know, you're the one who gives your money and then suffers. When you are so fond of 25-year-olds, there are paid girls for this job, believe me they are much cheaper than these muffins you deal with, they are professional separately and the service is much better ....
The classic is a classic, the uncle and the young mercantile young lady. I wonder how this scenario does not go out of fashion. How exactly can we imagine a young and smart girl that any young man can have, to deal with a mature one, without having any second thoughts! I don't attack the author, there have always been men who pay, but it's comical to explain that she falls for him. Author on what exactly to fall for, on your aging za * nik or on the dome, which is certainly shiny, like a helicopter pad. No problem, give your money, some give it for dogs, others for families, others for shoes, but please don't tell 20 commenters that it's about feelings. You're just disguising something that a fifth-grader can see. Reconcile yourself, you're fighting for sex you haven't even smelled, which makes you in an even more ridiculous situation. To be alive and healthy to earn, because you will have to pay hard all your life and the fee will double with the years you accumulate. The 26-year-olds won't end, so will the payers.