Hello! We were together for 9 months with him and we separated, because after 2 months I am leaving to live in another city and we decided that we would only struggle to be together. We keep in touch, we broke up a month ago, we write to each other often, today he offered me to have sex. We talked and he was like "At least we can do it, it was very nice" and he's right, it was very nice, I really want to have sex with him, but on the other hand I haven't experienced it yet it will be super hard for me when he saw it. We haven't seen each other since we broke up, the first few days were hard for me - I cried for hours, I didn't sleep, I didn't eat, I realize it's better for both of us, but I really don't know what to do about sex. On the other hand, I offered him literally everything and he, if he found sense to "fight" and he loved me really wouldn't leave me just because of my departure, I'm on this principle, I would struggle for a man if I think it's worth it. I felt underestimated in this regard, I do not know whether it is right or not to have sex.
Answers 6
It's not right, he wants you sex so it's not dry. For you it will be making love, for him it will satisfy the urge. He tells you these things to manipulate your feelings. You will feel drained after sex.
The very fact that he is willing to offer you such a thing with a clear mind and a presumed judgment that it is certainly difficult for you, you loved him and still love him, speaks well enough about what kind of person you have been with during these months. Do not accept this offer - it is easy for men to have sex without feelings, they do not care about the female emotional state before, during and after. He is currently just looking for a way to satisfy a physical need, nothing more. Apparently, the parachute and hop did not open for him on the "market of the unattached" - with the former. In the end, you will come out very hurt if you agree. However, let the fact that he mentioned how good it was for you to be disgusted not flatter you - from the side it seems like a method and approach by which he can achieve what he wants, namely: just sex. Men often use this learned strategy. They think that with their compliments they would immediately conquer territory. Well, yes, but in front of more sensible and smart this trick does not work. Do you want to be that kind of person? Used only to satisfy needs? And do you want to be like that? Remembering you when it's dry? You deserve much better. Do not deceive yourself or delude yourself that behind his words are sparks of love. If he didn't want to try it from a distance (he even mentioned it to you as an idea), that means it's not for you. I wish you luck and success! I hope you find a person who deserves your attention and love more than this hidden (at least in my opinion) user! :) when it is dry? You deserve much better. Do not deceive yourself or delude yourself that behind his words are sparks of love. If he didn't want to try it from a distance (he even mentioned it to you as an idea), that means it's not for you. I wish you luck and success! I hope you find a person who deserves your attention and love more than this hidden (at least in my opinion) user! :) when it is dry? You deserve much better. Do not deceive yourself or delude yourself that behind his words are sparks of love. If he didn't want to try it from a distance (he even mentioned it to you as an idea), that means it's not for you. I wish you luck and success! I hope you find a person who deserves your attention and love more than this hidden (at least in my opinion) user! :)
If you do not learn to control yourself, you will be controlled by others. Point.
This is called "friends with extras". You are not officially a couple, but you see each other from time to time for sex. Not bad, but the problem is that you still love him and suffer that you are not together, and on the other hand he does not want to fight for you and your relationship and for that he chose to separate. So the situation is a bit naughty. It's not a problem to see each other sometimes for sex, but the problem is that it's not enough for you, so it's best to find out who expects what from your relationship and make a decision. There are three options. 1. You break up permanently and no more sex. 2. You drive her like that, with meetings for a quick sex from time to time. 3. You fight for your relationship and become a traditional couple. Only you can decide, but obviously this situation suits him much more than you, which clearly speaks, that his feelings are not so strong and it is enough for him that he sleeps with you from time to time. I don't know if it's worth maintaining such a relationship.
There is a saying: "Whatever a man does to himself, a whole village cannot do to him!". So do you - the masochistic. Knock your balls with stones and then cry that it hurts! :)
I'll hang around while he's alone. If you find another one, it will stop like magic. It's as if he hasn't bothered you for days, writing, calling and still looking in love and wanting you. It will just evaporate. Even if you look for it, it will cut you and tell you not to look for it. That he already has a girlfriend, and she is perfect. He will say that his girlfriend is against talking to you, and he will not cheat on her. If something doesn't work out with the other one, it will look for you again with all kinds of excuses. Well, any contacts with exes are not recommended. Only annoyances and unnecessary headaches. Don't go for less that your full potential.