Hello! I'm a girl of 13, my brother is 17. I'm an absolutely normal girl, I fit wherever I go, but not him. My brother is something of an outsider, he is strange and our classmates constantly comment that he is different and I more or less started to be ashamed that he is my brother. For some unknown reason, he dresses from top to bottom in black, constantly wearing hoods and headphones. He listens mainly to thrash, metal and similar styles. He doesn't talk to anyone even when someone tries to strike up a conversation with him, he just turns up the music. He paints terribly well, but only some metallic or satanic things, I have no idea what to call them. Everyone calls him crazy, a psychopath and all sorts of things, but he doesn't care what they say. Some time ago he got a tattoo (with the knowledge of ours of course) some perverted version of Batman, which was again commented on by all my classmates. They tell me that they don't envy me that he is my brother and every time they see him they say "Look at this crazy guy". Some of the girls say it's very nice, but no girl would deal with it unless it's the same freak. The boys try to harass him, but he doesn't care about anything, even his ex-girlfriend comments on his strangeness. He hardly comes home after school, I have no idea where he goes, but he comes home late at night, and on rare occasions when he is at home he stays in his room and listens to music, doesn't even eat, eats about once a day. I told our people that I was a little ashamed of him, and they told me that he wanted to be like that and we have to accept him that way, but I want him to be normal, not like that. I want to have a normal brother, but he is not!
Answers 26
When the "normal" insult a lunatic and a psychopath, but do not realize that they are acting as such… Otherwise, the story seems fictional to me, if in fact these things happen to some people. Black Sabbath
Well, your classmates are not right to make fun of him like that. Otherwise, I suspect that your brother has some kind of depression, since he doesn't even have an appetite. It is for a therapist in my opinion. But most likely yours are to blame, and they do not know how to approach it ... In fact, the rule is that parents are always to blame in such cases, because they are responsible for the health of their children, including mental, emotional.
I will ask only one question: Who do you love more? Your friends or your brother? It is a moral duty to love your brother as he is. Beautiful or ugly, healthy or with a disability, different or like the others - just accept it! If your brother feels that even his closest people do not like him, he will feel like an abandoned nothing. In such conditions a person can make trouble with himself ... Friends are up to date, family is for life!
Your brother is not abnormal, he is your typical teenager. He is not the first to dress in black and listen to some music. I would advise you to take your brother's side and say a kind word about him to others. In 3 years, the classmates in question will have disappeared from your life, and your brother will still be your brother. The only thing that worries me is where you hang out until late at night and you can talk to your parents about it. But it's a matter of your parents, not you, who are 13 years old.
You can't tell him what to be and what not! This is him! Just as he can't tell you what to be, so you can't tell him what to be! This is the situation! Accept him as he is and support him! He needs your support!
If I had a sister like you, I would beat her! You are disgusting. What if all this was talked about? Advocate for your brother, as long as you are influenced by the "cool", and whoever supports you is a real friend, and whoever is not - so your company is just like you - elementary offspring. Friends come and go especially at your age, family is forever and I hope you understand and realize it. One day all your loved ones will die - parents, grandmothers, cousins, friends if you will and you will have only your brother from this family. You are too young to understand me, but try to get closer to him and protect him.
Your brother is a MEGA dude! I don't exactly listen to satanic metal - black and death, I'm more into heavy metal and classic rock. My appearance is either like a rebel or like the black carpet: D. I've always been commented on, I've looked like a whore, I've looked abnormal, I've been crazy. Instead of being ashamed, be proud of him for being brave, no matter what people say about him! F19
I'm sorry, but your brother is depressed! Since when is he like that? Did they insult him or lose a friend or boyfriend? One girl
I think he's pretty normal .. He just didn't choose to be disgusting like the others .. I think we'll get along very well .. I always see myself even though I'm a girl .. You shouldn't be ashamed of him .. he's as it is, but I think there is a problem that keeps it in and there is no one to share it with. You should be by his side and support him no matter who his brother is. Instead of being ashamed of him, try to understand him and talk to him.
I don't think it's your brother who's having a problem, it's you. If I were you, instead of listening to who said what about him, I would defend him. In general, the attitude of your friends is very nasty, and on top of that they feel comfortable commenting on it in front of you. Separately, yours is right, you have to accept it as it is. In my opinion, he is not a stranger, but he is excited about things that others at this age do not care about, and this sometimes turns out to be a really big obstacle. And in order not to want to communicate with anyone, there may be a reason - maybe he likes to be alone, he may not like the character of others, and he may have a problem. Have you tried to talk to him about this? ж14
It does not interfere in people's lives! It's very cool even!
He must be liked by everyone, right? !!
And what are you like to give labels? Normal or not, that's him. You have no right to interfere in his life, when you grow up you will understand.
Your brother is either more sensitive than you think, or he's so overwhelmed that he doesn't care what others think of him. Either way, it has the right to be different and you have no reason to be ashamed of it. Zulu
Instead of calling your brother "weird" and "outsider," get closer to him. People who listen to metal mainly want to escape from reality. Because their real life is lonely, boring and without friends. Imagine the following situation: Everyone around you laughs, insults you, your sister / brother is ashamed of you and avoids you, your parents don't care about you ... what would you listen to, what clothes would you wear , black, isn't it, a sweatshirt with a hood non-stop to hide from people who insult you and don't understand you, with headphones to escape from reality and not hear their insults ... how would you feel? Show a little understanding for each other was people, you are a family, and even if you are not ... that's why there is a high percentage of suicides. You just reject the different and lynch them ... even your own blood and flesh. Knight Rider
Whatever he is, he is your brother, you are one blood and you must be his support and accept him as he is, whether you like him or not! Do you live for yourself or do you live for human opinion girl? Put yourself in his place at least for a while before you judge him! Tomorrow your superficial friends may turn their backs on you, but a brother you are ashamed of will never do so. He would not hesitate to jump into the fire when you are in danger and will always try to comfort you in difficult times.
If the boy feels so good about you, what's your problem? He is free to dress as he wants, to listen to what he wants and you can't make him change! Why are you ashamed? Because it's not part of the statodo? Take an example from him and do not be like the other sheep!
Of course, I love my brother, I just want him to be like the others. He was always different, but at least before he was more normal - he wore different colors from black and talked to people. I haven't talked to him about any problems, because he doesn't even talk to us. His music never stops, even if he can't hear us, he increases it so much that when we are around him we can listen to it. How do I talk to him if he doesn't want to? (the author)
Instead of your parents, I would worry about YOUR development, not your brother's, I would talk to you seriously, and if necessary, I would take you to a psychologist. Read "The Two Kingdoms" by Katya Antonova and "Let me tell you" by Jorge Bucay. Good luck and smiles! :) F 30
I really like how you are ashamed of your brother, because society doesn't like him and you don't like him, end, period, he's not yours anymore. Well, you're not exactly like that, but who knows how far you'll get to fit in. My brother and I were "normal," but now that I think about it, I'm sad that we were part of the "normal." modern society (not that it is something new, and it has been so before) does not tolerate such individuality. Call it heresy, if you will (it has nothing to do with the true meaning of the word heresy). They, once you fit in, then you are at least a little popular. Try to change your mind about it (you don't have to change everyone's mind). One little tip - try girls first. If they think he's cute (or nice, I don't remember anymore) they'll still have some sympathy for him. And the boys, we are like that. And we had one who didn't fit in our class and we made fun of him .. Yeah .. In fact, children can be very bad, but not bad. So decide: - Risk your popularity and your status as a "normal" girl and help your brother. "Drop him, but what is he like to you?" He's your brother, by accident. That way they won't think you're crazy. Good luck with the delicate situation. PS - Your brother is completely normal. This is a phase.
I'm the same as your brother, so he looks super normal to me. And I don't like a lot of people around me and I prefer to be alone and listen or watch something I like. I also dress in black and with sweatshirts and a teacher thinks I'm a Satanist and even a dealer and a drug addict, but I don't care! Love your brother as he is, because this is his style and he cannot be like the others, rejoice that he is himself, he is not unhappy with that, on the contrary. I would be his friend right away, we have a lot in common, so I hope he finds his environment with people like him! Chris
"... He doesn't even talk to us ..." Sorry about the question, but do you live with Dad? I felt sorry for the boy - obviously his parents can't find a way to him and he feels completely alone. And the blame for this is not in the boy, but in them. Somewhere over the years, the relationship broke down, which they, as parents, were obliged to find ways to protect her, especially the FATHER. Please read my words to your parents
You can't change people. Your brother can only change if he wants to. In a year he will be an adult and now your parents will not be able to confuse him, and neither can you.
From experience I say that often the more closed and cold people from the outside are emotional and sensual from the inside. Of course, not all, but a significant part of them. I am almost 100% sure that your brother is like that, without having seen him in a photo. We're just a "breed" with him, and I know others like him. If you look into your brother's soul, you will probably see sensuality and emotionality that you have almost never encountered. Only that he hides his essence because he is afraid of how others will accept him and therefore does not allow people to himself. And don't do bad, because most people would make fun of him for that, because there are completely different qualities in fashion. He probably needs love and understanding, but he doesn't know from whom and how to ask for it, and for some reason he may feel inferior for it. For this, that he walks outside - probably walks and listens to music. So he relaxes and runs away from this world. Many metals are like that, including me. I guess he goes to more abandoned places, he can take pictures or collect ideas for new paintings, and he can paint in such places. I have already identified more than 10 of them and next week I will go to paint. Black Sabbath
25 - "I'm temerut, but inside, deep down I'm a nice and funny person. But it's so deep inside that no one will ever see it" Sorry, but I launched Google Translate, that it was a little difficult for me to translate it .
26, well, as much as you can understand, so much. As I look, you don't understand anything from my previous comment, maybe because Google Translate translates from foreign languages… Black Sabbath