I don't want to go deeper, so I'll go through everything briefly - I'm 14 years old. My father has been getting drunk since I was born. He earns BGN 1,000 a month, and he never gave me BGN 2 to buy something to eat at school. Drunkenness + BGN 1,000 per month = betting (in his case.) He already owes at least BGN 15,000 to a bank, not to mention his debts to his friends and the like. My mother works for much less money and can't stand that my father wastes all his own. They have had quite a few midnight scandals since I was 3-4 years old. For a year now, my mother, probably because she no longer cares about my father, has been cheating on him. I checked her chats and the like in messenger / I know her password / and honestly I'm disgusted. As if my father is not enough for me. My aunt who lives with us, has seen and endured everything that has happened under our roof and is one of the few people I trust completely. Should I tell her about what my mother is doing I want to be relieved, to reveal everything to everyone in front of everyone and finally everything to end - even with a divorce, if necessary.
Answers 19
In your place, I would tell my aunt and give an ultimatum to expel my father or tell him. You have a chance with this information to get rid of the alcoholic at home. He does not give money, what is it for you? Otherwise, I support your mother in having a lover, but why not kick out the alcoholic?
Do not interfere in the affairs of adults. Such a scandal will only deepen your father's problems.
In my opinion, tell your aunt, as a more mature person, to decide what to do.
If you don't love or hate your mother - betray her ...
Honey, how are you sure your aunt doesn't know? And one more thing, if your mother wanted to keep it a secret, you wouldn't know her password or anything. If a woman has a lover - no problem, if there are many already a whore is different! If I were her, I would have a lover with drunks, nothing happens, no family, nothing. But still tell your aunt ... or tell your mother directly that you know how to react. But I think she WANTS you to know because if she didn't want to, you wouldn't know her password! But he definitely talks to his mother, his aunt ... I'm not sure some things should stay at home! SUCCESS! CT
Your aunt probably knows.
Your father is a complete alcoholic and gamblers, and you complain that your mother is cheating on him. This is perfectly normal.
Why do you think that by knocking it down, your problems will be solved? How do you think your mother feels with your father - she is neither her husband, nor her partner, nor her father? Isn't there a right to feel human? I'm not for infidelity at all, I haven't cheated myself, but your father deserves it. Instead of creating additional intrigues that are not known how they will end, focus your efforts on divorce, that your father will drag everyone to the bottom. He will burst one day and you will pay for his misery.
From the author To 5 - there is only one lover and she is not a whore in any way, she never was and I believe she never will be. Let me clarify this with the password: when I was younger, about 8-9 years old, I wanted to create a Facebook account, but they wouldn't let me. But I was quite cheeky and finally my mother agreed to give me her password. Now, she uses messenger with her Facebook account, she has never changed her password. Therefore, my mother did not want me to know about it. TO 4 - I have no reason not to love her! About 1 and 9 - many times she threatened him with divorce / once it almost happened / but it never happened. Probably because they can't just afford it. About 9 - I have an idea that if I tell anyone about it, it could get worse / and that's why I didn't do it And I wrote here about the situation./ But I, as their child, don't I have the right to have my own opinion on what my flesh and blood do? And just because I don't approve of it doesn't mean I can't understand it. And to clarify, I want to share with my aunt, because I'm afraid a new scandal will break out. She and I could decide what to do, peacefully and without complications (I know she would do that, I know her after all.) I may look like a bitch who can't figure out what's really going on, but I see it as an opportunity - a catalyst to end it all: my parents getting divorced, my father leaving, and my mother finally lighten up. But, of course, things can get worse. Let me repeat: that is why I wrote here about the situation. Thank you very much to all of you, you help me not to do stupid things don't I have the right to have my own opinion on what my flesh and blood do? And just because I don't approve of it doesn't mean I can't understand it. And to clarify, I want to share with my aunt, because I'm afraid a new scandal will break out. She and I could decide what to do, peacefully and without complications (I know she would do that, I know her after all.) Let me mention that I understand what you all want to say. I may look like a bitch who can't figure out what's really going on, but I see it as an opportunity - a catalyst to end everything: my parents getting divorced, my father leaving, and my mother finally lighten up. But, of course, things can get worse. Let me repeat: that is why I wrote here about the situation. Thank you very much to all of you, you help me not to do stupid things don't I have the right to have my own opinion on what my flesh and blood do? And just because I don't approve of it doesn't mean I can't understand it. And to clarify, I want to share with my aunt, because I'm afraid a new scandal will break out. She and I could decide what to do, peacefully and without complications (I know she would do that, I know her after all.) Let me mention that I understand what you all want to say. I may look like a bitch who can't figure out what's really going on, but I see it as an opportunity - a catalyst to end everything: my parents getting divorced, my father leaving, and my mother finally lighten up. But, of course, things can get worse. Let me repeat: that is why I wrote here about the situation. Thank you very much to all of you, you help me not to do stupid things
Why did she put up with it for so long and not kick it until now .... Neither she has a normal life, nor you as a child. What is this "man" holding her so far with so far? Unfortunately or some kind of addiction? I understand your mother, but I don't justify her. Not wanting a drunkard for a man to divorce. I personally do not approve of extramarital affairs and therefore I think it is right to divorce first and then have a relationship .... and she is a person and she wants to be loved, respected and happy. Otherwise, I think your aunt knows, most likely she shared it, but because she sees how her sister lives with her husband, she is silent about it ... You can talk to your aunt carefully so she can see what she has to say. You are no longer small and you understand things. In the situation you are describing, your mother should divorce sooner and live peacefully alone.
Or you can just talk to your mother :)
But still, tell the truth. The truth must always come to light. The rest are bad things.
I would tell my mother that I knew before taking any other action. You better talk to her, not your aunt, and tell her that your father is not a commodity, but divorce is better than infidelity. Ask her how far she will go and what she aims for.
Your mother has the right to privacy and her own secrets. You think it's good for your aunt to know, but your mother may want to hide it from her. Keep in mind that people can't keep secrets - your aunt will tell someone else close and in 1 week a whole village will whisper behind your back. There is no point in talking to your mother either. What she tells you will always be justified for some reason, and you know the reasons. I guess your mother isn't divorcing because she thinks she can't do it alone. That is, she is at a dead end. If you want, talk to her about divorce.
Tell your mother to divorce first, and then everything will fall into place
I think your mother is right. Put yourself in her shoes and think about how you would feel if your husband didn't respect you for anything, and even if his child didn't respect you ... they probably didn't get divorced from a financial point of view or because they don't label you. " child of divorced parents ''. Your aunt is unlikely to fix things, she can make them worse, or if she is a cultured woman, she won't even intervene because that's exactly how it should be. Why don't you talk to your mother but show understanding?
Do not boil your nose where you do not work, the mother also needs love and happiness. She doesn't read what is written, whether she will enjoy it if she reads your writings on the net. This is her personal space, you forced yourself not to go in there. This is a world of the great and you don't understand many things. This is the choice and right of your Vanka. Do not command anyone's life, look after yourself. Maybe he's still with your father just because of you. As married to him, she can pay his debts tomorrow, even if she has not signed a contract just because she is married to him.
It's not right to spy on your mother and she doesn't do it anymore. And when you tell your aunt and others that your mother has a lover, so what. Nothing will change. After you've learned, maybe your father knows and doesn't care that his mothers cheat on him - his love is alcohol and gambling. So the "secret" is unlikely to lead to divorce, if that's what you're aiming for, and even if your split up, that's how it could change and improve your life.
If your aunt is your mother's sister, talk to her, otherwise talk to your mother. In any case, you have considered the possible consequences soberly enough. If there is a discussion with your mother, explain to her frankly how bad you feel about the situation in your home. You are her daughter and she should put you first.