The story I'm writing about is quite recent, but it's quite difficult to make an accurate and correct decision. I was abandoned by my wife after about four years of happy life. We had great experiences, we loved each other truly and unreservedly, we did not have conflicts and crises, and we paid a lot of attention to our child. But something cracked and after a period of alienation of a few months, he just moved in with someone else. Naturally, everything is born before that, gradually, after it has been obscured by loud promises of material benefits, prosperity, business, real estate, etc. of this type, who actually has two children and a wife, maybe divorced, but maybe not. For a long time I was thrown dust in my eyes, there were a lot of lies and tricks, which I later found out. Apparently a manifestation of weak character, will, but for a woman of almost thirty years. He says that he realizes this mistake, that he loves me, but we need this to subside in order for things to get better, but then he takes the other direction again. Frequent mood swings, clearly why, right. But as a more reasonable, sober person, I am looking for a constructive way out, but I do not know where the breaking point is between truth and falsehood, the value system and selfishness. A second chance, forgiveness that was asked of me, but if it is missed, it must be the last.
Answers 4
Hello, Mr. X. I am a woman and I will comment from my belfry. If a woman / man has looked away, then something in the relationship is lame. Think about where the problem is, what is the pebble that cracked the tile. If it's with you, remove it, if it's with her, it's almost pointless. Are you willing to forgive her? She replaced you with another! I would not forgive infidelity, no matter how much I love the other person. Think first of all about yourself and how you will feel. If you love her so much, forgive her, but she will break again. Trust me! I know female psychology better than you do. The last thing I want to tell you is don't listen to what people have to say, because you are the one who lives with her, not the people. The decision is yours alone.
To some extent I share the opinion of №1. Apparently there is some reason for all this to happen. What is more worrying, in my opinion, is that this is not a hobby. There is a sequence and a very well thought out strategy here. Maybe you need more time to make sense of your personal plan. Take a very good look at the details and you will judge whether it is worth continuing your life in a lie. But whatever the truth, you have to understand it. Otherwise you will bake on low heat, especially if you love your wife. When you drink the cup of bitterness to the end, then you will know for sure what you want and you will make the right decision. Try to get to know your wife very well and then you will surely know when it is worth compromising and when not. Good luck
Why don't you forgive her, I can't understand, people, you don't have a problem with communication, you're worried that you won't find anyone else, but if it's like this, why should she have it, she does it, because of the most the bad thing is that it kills complexes. And if you forgive her on the second day, she will go to another, without even thinking, she is selfish without knowing her, I will tell you for sure. If you want to forgive, if not, you forget her and it's only her fault that you're so worried.
If your heart speaks of forgiveness and if only then you will be calm, forgive her. If you do it for the sake of human opinion, it makes no sense. But anyway, you are already at a very advanced stage and your relationship is doomed - like a pot that will be glued, but anyway it is no longer whole.