I'm a 25-year-old boy, closed, uncommunicative, well, not heptane, but let's face it - congested. I'm tired - To feel like a punished child who can be scolded at any moment ... as very well described in one article. A more or less banal story: For example, from a good-looking non-direct colleague, 20 years above me - I'm so worried that I can barely breathe! ... Even recently, when I was close to her (dangerously close: D), my head started shaking left and right, I even had to stay in this state for a relatively long time. I think I blushed. Every second thought is mine, I even dreamed of it as far as I remember. Otherwise, we have "known" her for a long time, after all, since I have been working in this company, I left only at one time, but these are details. For more than a year I have been in a position in the squat that includes relatively frequent "meetings" with her. I've felt similarly in her presence before, but not so bad. Lately, however, I'm not sure what's happening to me, whenever I have to pass her or she comes, I worry a lot and tremble, but when, for example, my colleague and I talk about something and I don't focus so much on her, and maybe subconsciously or not - I accept that when I talk to someone, I don't think about her and she knows I have nothing to worry about. In fact, maybe I should just talk to her at least from time to time so that the situation is not awkward. I know it looks dull on the side, but put yourself in my place, at least for a moment. And, by the way, I'm on Abilify ...
I had at least two panic attacks years ago and other similar experiences. In general, I am ashamed of people and I am worried about what they are talking about and especially about whether something is related to me and whether I will be worried about the topic they will take up, even if it is not the conversation for me. Someone had said in another story that there was no greater shamelessness than shame ... to ask him if it would be nice for him to have literally blocked the whole thing, to look with such a face like a lamb and not dare to he moved his lips, to worry that they were stuck to each other and so on ... on top of everything and someone to blame him for being ashamed ??? Overall: I am hindered by many things, some of the biggest of which are that I strive to be at once neutral, serious and confident looking, in a word - like a robot! Alas, I'm not so confident.
Literally looking at each other and just for a moment face to face with this colleague, I shudder. When I hear her talking in the distance - again, and even if it's someone else, I imagine it's her. When someone comes to us with a colleague, often I do not even dare to look, if it is her! My stomach just goes crazy with anxiety. That's not all - I do the same in many other situations, for example, I turn somewhere to look at someone, yes - but - no - half action! I know, I know - it's absurd, but what can I do, do I have OCD ... in fact, I certainly have at least some of its symptoms. For those who do not know and are not looking for - "Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder" In the beginning, when I started in this company, I was again attracted to one or two colleagues (aunts), but then at least I talked to one, and the other just talked about her when she's gone, but anyway ... Then I had everything like a game. Everything was new and interesting to me.
Answers 7
Fuck, you don't see the two of you.
Investigate this colleague. There may be a husband and children, and even things may turn out between you and you may end up being used and breaking your heart.
You will not recover on your own! I am 39 and it was the same for me until 4-5 years ago. Things calmed down for me after I hated women and especially one of them. I came to this decision myself to hate her. I have not consulted anyone. I don't look a woman in the eye, not even the one in question. For me, they are the object of sexual desire until then. I know what they can do to me if I reveal myself to them. And the one I've been sighing at for over 15 years, quite openly and without worrying and still showing that I don't even want to talk to her. I'm sarcastic about her. Rough. If he still insists on talking to me, I'm short and uncomfortable to talk to. Friend; stop thinking that these squatting pees are a great thing. And they go to aka was a brother! For two fingers of meat is not worth making fun of you. If you don't tell yourself "fuck them", cant happen. Grandpa Tosho
One of your sets will give you or at least try to give you guidance. And I'm 25. First, you're not a boy, you're a man. You are a man of 25. And from now on, when you introduce yourself somewhere, you say that you are a man of 25. Stop feeling sorry for yourself, immerse yourself and humiliate yourself in any way. Your colleague has long smelled you having fun. Women understand even before you think about it. It is quite possible that he came to you on purpose for some reason. Women who have families after 30 and something start to look very seriously at something foreign, something younger, but also discreet. It's just that family life is getting bored, their husbands aren't exactly the men they really wanted to be with, they just had children to have someone to take care of them, but that's another topic. However, your social skills are very limited. And that, that you fall for dolls so much, and not for poop between 20-25-27, says that you were most likely raised with a feminist view of things. You were a good boy to mom, the father, even if he was there physically, did not show his true role as a man and the results are obvious. An insecure, weak man of 25, calling himself a boy. Fear of the slightest contact with women and general social anxiety about people. You think a lot, but a lot. Replace thinking with action. Maybe I shouldn't talk to them, but you go and talk, if you want to have the biggest stupidity to say that you can think of. But you have to work on your confidence first, so that you don't collapse mentally even more after a woman's refusal. You need to start working on yourself right away. May I ask if you have been with a woman? I think we both know the answer. Start training, start reading a lot, totally ignore women at this stage of your life and focus on yourself. Start going out a lot, go around all the clubs, get drunk and not because a real man does that, but just go through this thing. Later you will find out what a waste of time it is to go to discos, to throw money for alcohol there and to take down women in discos, but this will accumulate some additional emotions that will change you in some way. It's full of women who are ready for sex the same night in the clubs, I won't tell you how many times women have run into me without doing anything, just because they want to fuck someone. Download and watch movies like Fight Club if you haven't seen them. You tube is full of people who know what they are talking about and can help you improve. Write Coach red pill and listen to what he has to say. You will recognize yourself. Download No more mr nice guy and The Rational Male. It's been a long time, but you have a lot of work to do, listen to me at least a little so that I don't waste my time writing in vain.
I will tell you only one thing - grow up, you are 25 years old, and you define yourself as a "boy"! Understand that the world does not revolve around you, the woman does her job, like all your other colleagues, no one went with you to deal with and monitor your every action. If you are interested in it, and this is very clear from what has been written, this is already a separate issue. Then you need to know if she is married to begin with. The next and perhaps most important step would be to grow up and behave adequately for your age, because a mature woman who has seen a lot of life would not pay attention to a "boy" like you, women like confident men who can control their behavior according to the situation in which they find themselves. Even if you only meet for carnal pleasures, for what is a small doe with an apology, who will panic at the slightest glance at him or comment on his address? You have to mature first as a way of thinking, then you have to start taking things in stride and finally build confidence - that way you can turn your age into an advantage, because this woman will really be able to say to herself, “It's a young boy, confident, what's stopping me from trying? ”And not, as you would probably say at the moment,“ what do I care about this kid who looks from left to right and behaves inappropriately? ”. Think about my words! And he did it for himself, not for this woman or anyone. You yourself will feel calm and will not feel anxious when communicating! Don't diagnose yourself! Dr. B then you have to start taking things in stride and finally build confidence - that way you can turn your age into an advantage, because this woman will actually be able to say to herself, “He's a young boy, he's confident, what's stopping me from trying? ”And not, as you would probably say at the moment,“ what do I care about this kid who looks from left to right and behaves inappropriately? ”. Think about my words! And he did it for himself, not for this woman or anyone. You yourself will feel calm and will not feel anxious when communicating! Don't diagnose yourself! Dr. B then you have to start taking things in stride and finally build confidence - that way you can turn your age into an advantage, because this woman will actually be able to say to herself, “He's a young boy, he's confident, what's stopping me from trying? ”And not, as you would probably say at the moment,“ what do I care about this kid who looks from left to right and behaves inappropriately? ”. Think about my words! And he did it for himself, not for this woman or anyone. You yourself will feel calm and will not feel anxious when communicating! Don't diagnose yourself! Dr. B and not, as you would probably say to yourself at the moment, “what do I care about this kid who looks from left to right and behaves inappropriately? ”. Think about my words! And he did it for himself, not for this woman or anyone. You yourself will feel calm and will not feel anxious when communicating! Don't diagnose yourself! Dr. B and not, as you would probably say at the moment, “what do I care about this kid who looks from left to right and behaves inappropriately? ”. Think about my words! And he did it for himself, not for this woman or anyone. You yourself will feel calm and will not feel anxious when communicating! Don't diagnose yourself! Dr. B
There is a golden rule: "Where you make a living, don't make a living!"
I am the author. I apologize for the late answer, in fact I have only just decided to read the answers and honestly I expected them to be much sharper. "Boy" - that's how it fits more with the quotes, isn't it :) It's true that with these words I humiliate myself. My mother and father have been separated for a long time, I was in 6th grade ... if they weren't, maybe it would have been different. You remember that I lived with my mother ... I was constantly looking for support, I remember something else - I had obsessive thoughts, and not only then, but then I thought about my mother's death and roared in bed at night. I had various tics, and now I have some, rather habits - like shaking my shoulder or making various sounds when no one can hear them. I stopped taking the pills for almost 10 days and of course - I don't feel any difference. I will add that very often, not only at the sight of chicks - my face somehow relaxes, becomes such an inadequately responsive, worried and sometimes trembles, something like the beginnings of a smile, and sometimes a kiss or at least that's what I think ... I'm not just talking about the colleague in question. In fact, if I have to clarify, she is basically an extremely nice and relatively nice person, and I'm sensitive, and maybe that's why I was caught drowning in a straw.
My work at the moment is related to spending a long time mainly in a room with poor lighting and "interaction" with ... ironically or not - a robot machine :) It is clear to me that these things with the lack of sunlight and what not it's not just whining and that if I'm stable they won't bother me ... but I still think that this situation has greatly affected me ... the nervous system and the soul I would say. I have written on a note various things similar to these here, which I will share in a forum with specialists in the field of mental problems, whose name I think is not shared here to write. Thank you really for the openings! To everyone.