Hello, I am a 27-year-old man, I am not married, but I have a serious girlfriend with whom we live together. To raise this topic, I was provoked by a conversation with my colleague, who was divorced due to infidelity on his part. We were gathering in a pub and the man relaxed. He is 41 years old and told me the following: "I am sorry that I broke up my family because of one sex, but if I had to start a family again, I would never do it with a woman who has cheated on her husband." I didn't ask him questions because it's not right to pick other people's wounds, but I was amazed. I understand that everything is strictly individual, but I am still interested: would a divorced woman who cheated on her ex-husband commit to a divorced man who cheated on his ex-wife? thanks
Answers 7
I will answer you directly - my husband had a brief affair with his colleague, which I learned about. We had a lot of quarrels and difficult conversations. I asked him to be honest and to answer me if he had anything to do with her and if he thought of divorcing me. I'll tell you exactly what he told me - "Can you hear me? So I just fucked a whore. He asked me to take her to the man and the villa and on the way he directly attacked me. Nothing, nothing justifies me, but only as her I saw how five minutes after she picked up her pants she took me to her husband - she ate no onions, she smelled no onions and started hugging and kissing him - I was told the game. Who would think of getting a divorce because of such rubbish? will bring a badjanak. No man takes a patch seriously. You can use it - but for family - never. I talked to her - I suspected that it was just justified. I pressed her - it turned out,that he told me the whole truth. Yes, author, this is your male thinking - when you fall - knock, and how do you hurt the person next to you - who is napping. But it is true that no one takes such a rift seriously and no one wants in his house.
In most societies, adultery committed by the wife is illegal and severely punished, while infidelity is tolerated or lightly punished. Until the 19th century, it was possible in England to file a civil lawsuit against the offended spouse for "criminal conversations." Even the inhabitants of Trobrian Island, praised by Bronislaw Malinowski in 1927 as sexually liberated people, punished women who committed adultery with death. It is generally accepted that this double standard is a typical example of the prejudices of society and nothing more. But the laws for other crimes are not like that. Women have never been punished more severely than men for theft or murder. The reason for this difference in the gravity of the offense, depending on whether he is cheating on the man or the woman, is that the law does not punish adultery as such, and only the possible introduction of foreign children into the family and even the insecurity that infidelity brings in this regard. Infidelity on the part of the husband does not lead to such consequences. Angel Clare from Thomas Hardy's novel "Tess of the D'Uberville", before his first wedding night, confesses to his new wife Tess that he sailed before marriage. Then, reassured, she tells him about her own seduction by Alec D'Uberville. She thinks their transgressions are equivalent. Here's a quote directly from the book and see what happens at the end: "Forgive me, as I forgive you, Angel! I forgive you." "You - yes, you forgive me." "And you don't forgive me?" in that case, it can't be forgiveness. You were one, now you're another. My God, what kind of forgiveness can there be for such tricks? Claire left her that night. "
I'm surprised you're a man and you still don't understand why. I've always looked at it that way. The woman is a support, the housewife, the person who supports you, looks after your children, helps you in everything, pays the bills with you, tries to keep the relationship. While the mistress is just fun, she has no real problems with the relationship and in life. She doesn't deal with bills (because most of them are paid by men), she doesn't deal with your children, she doesn't clean and cook for you every day, she just does what she wants and then goodbye to the next time. That is, life does not press her in any way at this moment and in the love part. That's why they are always smiling, slimy, they want to do everything your wife doesn't want, etc. And even if there are lovers who fall in love or claim it, I don't think you have the self-esteem to interfere in someone else's relationship, even in the end you stole the man. Because here, the mistress showed that the husband is not so loyal to his wife (as if it were the opposite case if the wife cheats). I have a girlfriend who cheated and I didn't hide my criticism and disapproval, as much as I wanted to, so I wanted to understand her and she tried to explain it to me like this: "It's easy to cheat on a person if you've done it before and not And if you have been caught and the other person has not shown emotion, you do it even more deliberately. But if you catch a new partner it will be harder to do it to him "and when you think about it, if in this situation You put up a fight, for example, there are many women and men who are beaten at home by their husbands, and if we give the example of a woman who is beaten by her husband, each of us knows that it will get worse and why? Because it becomes easier for him to beat her, as he has done before. But, regarding infidelity, I really believe that if a man or woman wants to change, he will do it, but no one else can make him / her, they have to ask for it themselves. And about this friend of mine who cheated, I can say that it happened about 5 years ago. God, she's not even the same person since then, of course she's changed, people change every day, as long as we want to! We cannot judge every person by the past, just as there are good people who have become good, so there are good people who have become bad! people change every day, as long as we want to! We cannot judge every person by the past, just as there are good people who have become good, so there are good people who have become bad! people change every day, as long as we want to! We cannot judge every person by the past, just as there are good people who have become good, so there are good people who have become bad!
It's like there are few families of ex-lovers? Even in most cases this happens, but someone has to scratch their tongue ...
Up to 4. Obviously you don't make the difference ... It's one thing for two people to divorce and reunite after being lovers, and it's completely different if they get divorced and don't live together, but have to look for new partners.
In my opinion, those who cheat should gather with the same type. Otherwise it is very selfish and one will always suffer. If it's not a problem for both of them to yell, then it will work.
Author who and where said that infidelity is a good thing?