Start Loving Yourself First

   Very well said! I know it's just like you say and I know that I will have to live a little longer to be able to forgive myself, accept my negative traits and the mistakes I made to love myself more and look for the best for me , and not all for others ... Bobby

   Admirations. You have found the right path. "first love yourself so that others will love you." THE NEW RELIGION OF THE 21ST CENTURY. Perfect selfishness. And will it help you to LOVE another?

   That is why Bulgarians are in this situation, because everyone is learning to love themselves and to recognize only themselves. That is why we have become a nation that everyone selfishly pulls towards itself and tries to satisfy their own desires. And that is why we are unhappy and depressed, because by loving ourselves, we become incapable of experiencing love, and love is about caring for the other more than you do. And that is why we have become a nation of selfish, self-loving. If it were so right, God would not say "Love your neighbor as yourself," because people are more inclined to love themselves, so this love must deviate from itself, in the name of the neighbor. I hope you understand what I'm trying to tell you, otherwise it doesn't make sense ..

   I support comment number 2.

   Nowadays, most people can't even realize what it's like to love yourself, which I'm sorry about. "Love your neighbor as yourself" - if you think about it, mean love the other as yourself, but how will you love your neighbor without having love for yourself, we direct love to the other from ourselves? !! This does not mean that I am selfish, on the contrary I have always been altruistic and believe me, then you spend except for those who deserve, but more! for those who don't need your help at all. It is necessary to first try to help themselves by not helping anything, then to turn to someone else for help. Nowadays, everyone is used to using the other ...

   I support the author. The position of others is hypocritical, because the indisputable fact is that one cares most for oneself. (Even the mentioned god from number 3 confirms it - "Because no one has ever hated his body, but feeds and cares for it ...") This means only one thing - that man loves himself the most, as much as not to realize it, not to admit it, or to feel love for others. Love is known by deeds - it is one thing to feel attracted or a long pleasant feeling to someone, it is quite another to sacrifice for the good of another, thus depriving yourself. Another reasonable reason to love yourself is that by taking care of yourself you will be able to develop and become more useful to others - you will be able to give them more both spiritually and materially, and you will not be a burden to them in case that you have prematurely distributed all your strength, health, money and the consequent lack of strength and conditions for intellectual and any development. Now you will say that you did not talk about full distribution, but about partial. How much in part? How will you weigh how much you care for yourself and how much for others? Did you feel the falsehood of your idealism? Of course, there are total egotists in this world, but critics of the author should note that he emphasizes personal development as a major factor in improving life in society. A bad tree cannot bear good fruit (according to the Bible), but what fruit will a tree left without care give? Who will take care of you if you don't take care of yourself? that you did not speak of a full distribution, but of a partial one. How much in part? How will you weigh how much you care for yourself and how much for others? Did you feel the falsehood of your idealism? Of course, there are total egotists in this world, but critics of the author should note that he emphasizes personal development as a major factor in improving life in society. A bad tree cannot bear good fruit (according to the Bible), but what fruit will a tree left without care give? Who will take care of you if you don't take care of yourself? that you did not speak of a full distribution, but of a partial one. How much in part? How will you weigh how much you care for yourself and how much for others? Did you feel the falsehood of your idealism? Of course, there are total egotists in this world, but critics of the author should note that he emphasizes personal development as a major factor in improving life in society. A bad tree cannot bear good fruit (according to the Bible), but what fruit will a tree left without care give? Who will take care of you if you don't take care of yourself? that he emphasizes personal development as a major factor in improving life in society. A bad tree cannot bear good fruit (according to the Bible), but what fruit will a tree left without care give? Who will take care of you if you don't take care of yourself? that he emphasizes personal development as a major factor in improving life in society. A bad tree cannot bear good fruit (according to the Bible), but what fruit will a tree left without care give? Who will take care of you if you don't take care of yourself?

   I support the №6 arguments are more than good. All you need is a person who can "see" behind ordinary sentences and read between the lines. By the way, I am 19 years old - a girl - and I came to this conclusion in my life, which I think is the truth ...

   Congratulations to the author! This is actually the right position, which does not mean selfishness at all, but it cannot be understood by people like №2 or №3. And it is not necessary. And I wish the author never to lose the connection with himself and to continue to develop spiritually!

   Thanks, comments №5 and №7 are actually mine, I forgot to write that they are from the Author. The author

   I don't think the author states that we should be selfish in a negative sense, everyone is selfish, whether they want to or not, to some degree. The problem is that some people only give a negative attitude to the word 'selfish'. And loving yourself requires selfishness to exist purely and simply. Having self-esteem, your own opinion, your own choice, your own vision, these are the things. This does not mean that you will not give love to someone else, but simply that you will give it if he / she deserves it. And that no one will get on your head.

   To the author. Being 19 explains a lot. Now I came back and read again both the topic and your comments later - 5 and 7. It seems to me that under the guise of life-affirming "to love myself to become a better person" - paraphrased, of course, is hidden a very great pain and disappointment. It seems to me that if I'm wrong, forgive me. Dear girl, it is true that one should love oneself, but the truth is rather different. One must first RESPECT oneself. It's a little different. Self-esteem includes pride, but not pride; self-improvement, but not ostentation of knowledge and skills; humility, but not obedience and subservience; care for the mind and body, but not creating a fixed idea of ​​beauty and perfection; ... many, many more things can be written. But, this is self-esteem, not SELF-LOVING. Perhaps my first comment was very short and sharp, and misunderstood. It is wonderful to respect yourself, it makes you a truly valuable and significant person, with self-confidence and at the same time pleasant, desired by others. But not to rise to a cult, as many do lately, because it will not take long and they will wake up alone and repulsed. This is what I meant by the NEW RELIGION OF THE 21ST CENTURY. It is a pity that we are seeing more and more people being deceived. Number 8 - people like us (I'm 2) may know and understand a lot more than you think. And they probably have a lot more life experience, not to mention that we are probably people who RESPECT themselves, but also LOVE the people around them. with self-confidence and at the same time pleasant, desired by others. But not to rise to a cult, as many do lately, because it will not take long and they will wake up alone and repulsed. This is what I meant by the NEW RELIGION OF THE 21ST CENTURY. It is a pity that we are seeing more and more people being deceived. Number 8 - people like us (I'm 2) may know and understand a lot more than you think. And they probably have a lot more life experience, not to mention that we are probably people who RESPECT themselves, but also LOVE the people around them. with self-confidence and at the same time pleasant, desired by others. But not to rise to a cult, as many do lately, because it will not take long and they will wake up alone and repulsed. This is what I meant by the NEW RELIGION OF THE 21ST CENTURY. It is a pity that we are seeing more and more people being deceived. Number 8 - people like us (I'm 2) may know and understand a lot more than you think. And they probably have a lot more life experience, not to mention that we are probably people who RESPECT themselves, but also LOVE the people around them. like us (I'm 2) maybe they know and understand a lot more than you think. And they probably have a lot more life experience, not to mention that we are probably people who RESPECT themselves, but also LOVE the people around them. like us (I'm 2) maybe they know and understand a lot more than you think. And they probably have a lot more life experience, not to mention that we are probably people who RESPECT themselves, but also LOVE the people around them.

   The fact that I wrote such a text says nothing about myself in real life ... It's just the author's idea

   №11, I don't argue that you know enough - this can't be done as a conclusion from 5 of your sentences. But in general, what you said is confirmed in your last comment. In what the author has written, there is no hint of the cult of egoism or how vital egoism is. That you love yourself does not exclude love for other people in the broadest sense of the word, but in fact it is a necessary condition to love at all. And for the life experience - mine is enough, considering the age I am. And once the author is 19 and has come to this way of thinking, he can only be greeted and encouraged. №8

   I did not read your story, it is true, but the title is a very true sentence that EVERYONE should read, understand and try to live by. Because when you don't respect yourself, you can't even respect your mother. When you don't love yourself, you can't love another. When you don't hate yourself, you can't hate another. When you are not honest with yourself, you cannot be honest with others. Examples ticking the white world about this as much as you want. And relationships are a hell of a thing. More precisely, the RIGHT relationship.

   You don't have to love yourself to be able to love others. For example: The doctor does not treat himself first and then others. I say it quite theoretically. On the contrary, when you get used to loving yourself, you get used to loving the other. You begin not to understand it, because you refract everything through the prism of your own desires. It is normal to have things in you that you love and others that you do not like. Here I am talking about selfish love, which conceals the fact that you are hurt or underestimated or neglected. Then man tends to build around himself a wall of selfishness in which he is perfect and much more than others. But it is this lack of love that isolates him and urges him to close his heart to himself. In other cases, this love of self is a manifestation of an inferiority complex, also instilled by people who have chosen to love and pay more attention to themselves and then to the other. Whether it was parents, friends or lovers, it doesn't matter. I try to say that self-love makes you feel good at one point, but the next time it makes you selfish, forgetting that others need love too. I'm number 3

   I am completely in the opinion of the author, 6 and 8 you also gave a good comment. :)) If you don't love and respect yourself, you can't love someone else. Selfishness? Watch more for others than for yourself? This is really hypocrisy and delusion - you look at the other out of fear, weakness, lack and need, in fact - you want to receive something, not to give. You want to get somewhere outside, from others, what you lack and lack. This is selfishness. You can't give something you don't have.

   And you number 15 do you get everything from yourself? You are completely built and perfect, and you never have to take anything from someone else? Here we move from selfishness to egocentrism :)

   to love yourself before you have shown the best in yourself is an elementary view of your own life. Difficulties, aspirations, risks, dreams are the things that can make you what you would love. To give the best of yourself, to believe in something invaluable, lofty - to have your own opinion, ideals and find the strength in yourself to stand up for them is the way to become a person, to show your uniqueness and then maybe one day you will say - I love myself.

   From the author: http://meditation.bg/2012/bozhestveno-kachestvo-lyubov/ This can be useful for you, by the way I accidentally found it :)

   One must first learn to love, first to begin with oneself and then to all

   Charlie Chaplin - Speech on his own Seventy Anniversary: ​​When I began to love myself, I realized how much you can hurt someone if you push them to fulfill their own desires before the time comes and the person is not ready, and this I am a man myself. Today I call this "confession." When I began to love myself, I stopped striving for another life and suddenly saw that everything around me invites me to grow. Today I call this "maturity." When I started to love myself, I realized that under any circumstances I am in the right place at the right time and everything happens at the right time, so I can be calm. Now I call this "self-confidence." When I started loving myself, I stopped robbing my own time and making spectacular projects for the future. Today I do just that, which brings me happiness and joy, what I love to do and brings pleasant feelings to my heart. I do this in my own way and at my own pace. Today I call this "simplicity". When I started loving myself, I got rid of everything that harms my health - food, people, things, situations. Everything that pulled me down and pushed me away from myself. In the beginning, I called this "the position of healthy selfishness." Now I call it "self-love." When I loved myself, I stopped always trying to be right and from that moment on I made fewer mistakes. Now I understand that this is "modesty". When I began to love myself, I stopped living with the past and worrying about the future. Today I live only for the present moment, when everything is happening. Now I experience every day for myself and I call this "realization." As I began to love myself, I realized that my mind could upset me and that I could get sick. But when I united it with my heart, my mind became a valuable ally. I now call this relationship "wisdom of the heart."

   I strongly agree! Learn to love and respect yourself, and then you can expect others to love and respect you. If you don't value yourself, how do you expect others to value you?

   Well, things are not black or white, there are other shades and not everything is written in a textbook. I thought that you have to love yourself to understand yourself first in order to be able to be in a relationship, this is never going to happen. A person would never get to know each other, always learn something new about himself all these years and would never he had to commit himself seriously. You can hate yourself for not liking yourself, but if your man shows up, he will make you forget your resentment towards yourself, and instead you will hug him very hard, he will give you a ray of light that sifts the darkness in you that you are. accepts as you are with its not so charming features.