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Love and affairs

The Confused Thoughts Of A Monster

By LonelyAttHome October 20, 2020 50 answers Last updated October 20, 2020

I don't know why, but I looked at my relationship a little deeper, feeling that I was somehow empty and lonely, and I had a loved one by my side. I have a man who hugs me, kisses me, gives me love. My parents adore him, for them he is the son they would like to have; my brother is amazed at him and imitates him; my friends can't find a bad word for him. Great, isn't it His parents treat me wonderfully, his sister became very close to me, his friends became my friends all at once, very cool people. My partner and I live in his own apartment, he works and is financially stable, but he always finds time for me. We have been together for 4 years. I go back to the time when we met. I was just graduating from high school and went to Sofia for preparatory courses at the university. As he moved to the capital, he did not stop coming to my city. True, he was not far away, but the fact is that he spent a lot of money on the road, and a lot of time. He was the first person I could introduce to my family and friends without worrying that they would not accept him. There was no way they wouldn't approve of him, because he's great in every way. He had settled down since we met, and he wasn't very old - 23 years old. An ambitious young man, on his feet, pushing forward, polite, kind, without arrests behind his back, without a file and without tattoos, with excellent diplomas, with diplomas from different courses, loving sports. Everyone was fascinated by him. Everything went slowly with him, little by little. At first we were friends with prospects for a relationship, and when he actually offered me a reunion, I knew I didn't like him. But he was in love. However, I thought that it just takes time and intimate moments, I decided that in time it will enter my heart and, of course, I accepted the offer. Our people sent me to Sofia, knowing that I was not alone there and there was almost no one to take care of me. They were right. I only spent a month in dormitories. All the while, my friend begged me to move in with him, and I thought it was too fast at the expense of the beginning. I accepted though. I thought I would love it, really. This should happen if you come across a person like him. He was a strong support to me at all times. He stayed up all night with me to study for exams, and he would interrogate me from time to time to make sure I knew everything. He struggled with me in writing reports on topics about which there is so little information, that every sentence found is like 1 kg of gold. He showed great patience and understanding when I first combined learning with work and was so nervous that even if I smoked two packs of cigarettes, I would not calm down. He knows how to act in any situation so that he makes me feel good. How much he gave me, what I gave him - there is no basis for comparison. He gave himself to me in every way, and I didn't fall in love or love him. I don't even love him as a friend, you know ?! And it doesn't occur to me how this is possible. Why don't I fall in love with him? Why didn't he deserve my heart? He is perfect, everyone adores him, I don't remember hearing a bad word about him. A bad word from him did not reach me either. If we separate, as we should in this situation, it will hurt me too. But not because I love him, but because I could not fall in love with such a good man. It won't hurt so much that he won't hug me anymore, I won't feel him next to me, but simply because I never managed to rejoice at his gestures. What am I? Am I a freak? Am I a monster? Can I feel at all? Do you know how I imagine the future? I break up with him, I catch up with someone at least twice as low, my environment spits out the new one all the time, my parents react as if C is their son and they want to kill me for abandoning him, no one approves of the new one my relationship, but I stubbornly stay with the new boy. But I'm unhappy anyway, because I know what I drove away, because I don't have support, because we have problems with my new friend. I can choose the other option. To stay with C, one day to get married, to start a family, to be the perfect family and to deceive him for a long time that yes - I love him too. Is it fair to him? No way! Here we come to the point where I clearly realize that I will not fall in love with him simply because 4 years have passed since the beginning. Four years! Not 4 months, but years. He is happy, he does not feel the lack of love on my part. He's happy to be with me, and I give him so little, so little, that I even want to kill myself when he doesn't want to. Once I realize the truth really clearly, how can I be by his side without feeling like a liar? Is there a chance? How do I marry him when I know I love him only in words? How to deal with it at all? And what if, say, we get married? Won't I suddenly meet the "love of my life"? Will I not leave it after we put on the rings. When will the separation hurt him more? Isn't it better to leave him now and hope that one day he will find a woman who loves him? Will he be happy? He gave me so much, I want him to be happy. Do you understand me? I want him to be happy and I would doom to him if I am sure I will never leave him. I would maintain the illusion. But I don't believe I can do it my whole life. One day I will break away from him simply because I am not in love, I will run after some other happiness. This often happens in May. He will be an ideal husband, a good father. I know it. I'm so mad at myself! I'm angry that I've been playing it for so long. We live in an illusion. Getting out of it hurts, but isn't that a good solution? Don't I have to do something good for this person after all? He will suffer without me, but he will probably suffer more with me. So the choice is clear, I guess. We are heading for separation. We have to go there, we have to. Otherwise, I doom him to a false life, and he shouldn't. He's a good man, really. It's just that I'm not.

Answers 50

1
prettygiirl420 answered · October 20, 2020

   I think that if your boyfriend was not so good to you, but mysterious and bad, when she should have fallen in love with him. Meaning, if you don't like the look ... you wouldn't be able to last so many years with him. But you've been together for 4 years ... so you still like it .... but something is missing to fall in love. Maybe you miss the "bad boy". He's too kind to you ... and we women, frankly, look for him ourselves, looking for bad boys ... and in the end we keep suffering. I would break up with him if I were you. There is no point in continuing to be with someone you don't love. There is no love, no passion ... why the hell are you doomed to such suffering? Love is a wonderful feeling - I wish you to experience it soon!

2
orianamartinez answered · October 20, 2020

   Make a firm decision and don't look back. What will happen if you split up is not clear. But what will happen if not - that's clear. You have nothing to think about this and that what he says, what he will think. The future will tell. And that you will meet love one day - that's for sure. Will it be so perfect? Probably not. Is it? D.

3
imjanedeleon answered · October 20, 2020

   You don't have to be in love with someone to start loving them. In any case, falling in love lasts for a maximum of 3 years.

4
HINAovo answered · October 20, 2020

   It would be better for both of you to separate now. You do not love him - this will not change, and without love life is empty. You deceive yourself if you think that's how you live - yes you can, but for a while. In an instant you will see everything you are missing here in the face of another. And then? It may be too late if you have started a family, children ... The injured will always be innocent souls. Think, then you will not make the decisions only for yourself, but it hurts endlessly when your heart wants one thing and you have to do another. I tell you from my own experience. That's not how you live, he thinks now. I hope you are happy. Good luck. R.

5
mlodzinapaleni11 answered · October 20, 2020

   Something similar has happened to me. The boy was amazing, he did everything for me, he was in love, but I was not in love at all. And I think I did the right thing - I broke up with him. It hurt, yes, he avoided me, but over time it passed and he met a beautiful girl who really loved him. For me, this is the right decision. Because if you don't leave now, you doom both of you to misfortune. You say that he does not feel the lack of your love, but it will not always be so. You will get tired of pretending and the truth will come out. Then it will hurt him more than if you don't end the relationship now. Good luck. F22

6
tanisha_banks answered · October 20, 2020

   Strange. And do you realize that what you are looking for exists only for 2-3 months? And then you get back into the routine of the relationship, the feelings subside, the habit and respect remain - supposedly what you have for the boy you are with at the moment. When you lose it, when you get lost between this and that, when you collide with real relationships, when you feel like the next one doesn't care that you're sick or that you can't handle something or even the smallest thing - yes let's say you want to eat ice cream, then you will realize what you have lost and you will feel hellishly bad, because you will have done it yourself. I think you're just in a hole right now and you need that shocking feeling of being in love, of having butterflies and all the accompanying emotions. But know that they are very transient and temporary. Be careful what decision you make. Think about it well. Vicki

7
jakey147 answered · October 20, 2020

   Sometimes we ourselves can not explain our behavior .. nor understand ourselves .. everyone wants to have a safe haven, to feel loved, cared for, attached, it is difficult to abandon your safe lifestyle and chase the vaguely led from uncertain thoughts and confused feelings ... what exactly is love? can she exist until the end of our days with someone ... I doubt that only when you break up with this person .. and when you are scalded by someone else you will realize what you have lost ..

8
jordan.fa answered · October 20, 2020

   Break up with him and you will love him. _g;

9
ivicazubac answered · October 20, 2020

   The boy is ideal according to public understandings - according to your parents, your friends, but more importantly, he is NOT PERFECT FOR YOU. It's not your fault, you're just subconsciously looking for something else. The choice you have to make is very difficult. Carefully read the comments above again, because they are very correct. Is it worth?

10
fatemeh_khavari answered · October 20, 2020

   I take a stand on the issue just because of the title - you don't have to think of yourself that way. When you say that about yourself, it means to me that you have a deep inner contradiction combined with a sense of guilt. No one is to blame for not being able to fall in love with someone - it's just that falling in love doesn't happen the way you imagine it. Otherwise, I agree with number 6, as long as the person doesn't hate you - you say you don't like him even as a friend - for me this is an inescapable relationship. You are not indebted to friends or parents on this issue - you are indebted to your future - you have made the right decision.

11
susanmartins answered · October 20, 2020

   From the author: Number 1, you are right that women sometimes look for it themselves. But I can't say that my life with him is suffering. Not so. She just doesn't have the thrill. Life doesn't seem interesting to me in any way, how can I say it ... We don't have nerves. Maybe this is the right expression. He always knows how to act, what to do, how to get out, which is wonderful. But when you think about it, everything is too smooth. Everything is decided until it emerges or is in its infancy. Stupid of me not to like that, isn't it? Really, I'm looking for the bad myself. Number 7, and I'm afraid of that. But I also think boldly to step there. I know that one day I will probably regret breaking up with him. I know that in all probability I will one day think that I have lost the ideal man. But what to do? It's good for me to stay with him, because he gives me security, and at the moment I'm not in love with another, I don't want to break up with him for another, but for himself. Because I'm lying to him, I'm lying to him right now. Maybe during these 4 years I slowly realized things, it became clear to me that I was not in love and this is unlikely to happen, but I had not yet reached the general conclusion. And now I'm at this station, which tells me that it doesn't work, that I'm just not the woman for him. I can't give him love, and that's all he wants. You know? He just wants a woman next to him to give his world to himself, and what does he want in return? Just tenderness, dedication, loyalty, love. I can't give him the last one. This is the problem, it doesn't work. How can I continue to live with him by lying to him and feeling inferior about it? In this case, he is blinded by love. After I'm with him, after I kiss him, since I do not shy away from his hands, after listening to his words - then everything is fine. He doesn't feel that I'm not as dedicated as he does, he doesn't notice that he always wants tenderness, and I just give it to him. It doesn't impress him that I don't reach out to kiss him, that I don't put myself in his arms, that I don't hug him when we fall asleep. But since he doesn't feel it, and I do - it's time for me to end all this so that he can have time to shake off the relationship, find a new partner and start a family with someone who loves him. I know that for me the right choice, if I think about my future, is to stay with him, but he really deserves a woman to long for him. I feel like a user right now, to be honest. He gives, gives, gives, and I take, take, take as if without giving anything. I'm just next to him. E, and? And I'm not talking about him giving me money. I also work, I earn less than him, but I still work and I can manage on my own, go out to my apartment and cover my expenses. The thing is, he gives me more than the material, he gives himself to me, and I don't give myself completely to him. I just had a feeling of inferiority, I have the feeling that I'm not doing anything for our relationship - he takes care of everything. Number 10, I like him as a friend. But I don't love him. I think I take him for granted in my life, I know that he is next to me and if I do not withdraw him from myself, he will not leave alone. It's like I own it. It sucks to say that, but he gives me so much security, he shows me so clearly that it's just me and ... I'm not afraid I might lose him. That is why it is a given. Maybe it affected my feelings. From the very beginning I did not have to fight for him, for his attention, for his time, for something. He didn't have the time to put on make-up for 5 hours and choose a toilet, he didn't have to worry about whether he would like me if I behaved like myself. With him, I never worried about how I looked at a given moment, because he was more interested in human behavior. And when we met, I had just come to the conclusion that one should not pretend and it is better to be oneself. So I was who I was and I didn't care if he liked it. I didn't put a gram of effort into the beginning of this relationship, I don't think I'm doing anything now - it goes smoothly by itself, and if there is an obstacle - he immediately removes it. I have already decided, I will talk to him. I know it's going to hurt him, but I'm going to tell him up and down, which I said here too. I have to explain to him how things are, because otherwise there is no way forward. After I tell him everything I have in mind, we will part. Since I suspect that he will find some way to continue, that is, he will look for an option, I will ask him for at least a month not to see or hear each other at all. Let me miss you, maybe I'll realize. And if he finds his soulmate in this period, let him be happy. I don't know what exactly will happen, but I will definitely tell him how things are with my feelings. I can't use it, it just doesn't deserve it. I'm thinking of having a conversation tomorrow night or Saturday. Then I will write what happened, I may want advice. THANK YOU heartily to all who wrote. I like that you don't know him and you don't approach the issue emotionally. That's why I'm writing here.

12
angelcutexxx answered · October 20, 2020

   Good evening to the author! She wrote an interesting topic! The title catches the eye, but is not true - with the exception of a few serial killers, no one deserves to be compared to a monster! I really want to help the victim with advice, but for this purpose I want to ask her a few clarifying questions! You don't mind, do you? Did she feel love before her relationship with the boy in question? She and her current partner have been together for 4 years - is there sex in the relationship? Does it lead to pleasure? Is there passion? Is there any reaction to physical hostility to him? Many personal questions ... I know ..... but they are important to get a clear idea ..... I apologize! As I read the story, I remembered a real case with an acquaintance of mine years ago! She had a relationship with a man who carried her in his arms, adored her, was ready for anything for her! They were colleagues, he was capable, smart and enjoyed great respect from everyone! They went for almost 5 years and it smelled like marriage! Her parents adored him! But my acquaintance obviously lacked something and decided to break up! He took it very hard, he wanted at least to remain friends, but she refused because he thought he was just looking for reasons to see her and annoy her! And the chick wanted to start fresh! She was cool, radiant, partying, provocative ..... and quickly met love and passion, ... it was for a short time ..... then another ..... and again .... and again ... !! I don't remember how many men she changed in less than 3-4 years and when I saw her she was always different and she looked happy! Let me clarify, though, that I'm not the man she dumped initially! And I didn't have a relationship with her and I didn't want to have one! Just in case! ; ))) And after a while I met her and she was unhappy and lonely - the man from her first relationship, who loved her and she had abandoned .... he was married and expecting a child! I saw her crying and I was amazed! For me, she was always an example of a successful and positive person and advised me in my difficult moments! She told me that after she changed a lot of men, with whom she had fun and had fun, she still realized that only he really cared about her ....! All the others were superficial types for hahohiho! But only when he got married and lost him did she realize her cruel mistake! The worst thing is that he told mutual acquaintances that he still loves her, but he already has a child and he would not ruin his marriage for the sake of the child! But if she had looked for him some time ago, he would have accepted her again, despite the many men she had changed! and so far I feel sorry for her! Because she's a class girl, but she had to marry an absolute woodpecker and pumpkin and her life is quite difficult .......! But every mistake pays off and there is no forgiveness! Author, such things happen in the world! I will wait for you to write in more detail about my questions! do not rush your decision in any case! Remember from me - there are few truly decent people! Most are done in a month or two, but in 4 or more years .... with a candle to look for them! ;)))

13
kociulek answered · October 20, 2020

   he is very kind, kind, caring and loves you: HORROR, some loser has found her where there is no BGN 2 in her pocket, she doesn't notice you, she breaks you, she slaps you like that for the sport to see if there will be a topic How to bring back the man of my life who I didn't appreciate before I lost :) I hope you make the right choice

14
peter_seitnap answered · October 21, 2020

   The author is a little quick to work, but finds time to write two lines to answer the questions that await her. I haven't fallen in love before, or at least I can't define my old relationships as such. They were children's work. He was my first man in bed and we are still active there. We lead a regular intimate life. I don't think he has any complaints, neither do I. Sex leads to pleasure for both of us, and passion on my part ... Well, not always, but it's not uncommon. Sometimes there is, sometimes I am with him just to be happy. I guess that's normal. There was never any physical dislike for him. . The story told in the twelfth commentary does not serve as a great inspiration for the separation, but I think it is necessary. At the very least, he needs to understand what I don't feel, because he's thinking more and more about marriage and children. Doesn't he have to know what kind of woman he's going to be engaged to? As I said in my previous comment, I am aware that I am making a mistake in my life, but after 4 years I more or less want this person to be happy. Now he is happy, I will give birth and he will be unearthly happy, and then? And I want children, I know that if he is his, they will never miss anything - he is very dedicated. At the moment I do not crave love, I do not know why, but it is not my goal in life. However, I am afraid that one day I will ask for her and then I will hurt him and our children. I think we need a serious conversation with him, after which it would be good to part at least temporarily so that I can come to my senses. Maybe if I feel like I'm likely to lose it, I'll really appreciate it. Now I tell you that I appreciate the things he does for me, but only mentally - not mentally, not through my heart. I know it gives me a lot, but somehow I don't feel inner gratitude. I don't know exactly how to describe this. Okay, I'm going to work. Have a nice day! :)

15
GoddessDoll answered · October 21, 2020

   Number 8 has hit exactly in the top ten ... It's always like that, we evaluate something only when we lose it. But there is something I do not understand. Why did you stay with him for 4 years, when you could have realized after the first one that ... um ... obviously you won't fall in love with him? I guess you felt safe with him, he was comfortable with you in terms of everyone liking him and being able to count on him for everything. But I think you waited too long to "fall in love." I don't know, I don't want to judge, because no one is insured against anything, but it's just not fair ... Quickly admit everything, whatever happens ... Good luck! :)

16
AgaMotylek answered · October 21, 2020

   I will allow myself to give you two pieces of advice, I add that I am a man and I do not understand anything about relationships: - tell him how you feel, and the most important thing is not to distort the truth. Reveal everything to him, from what you wrote I do not see that you have done anything wrong, just now is the time to talk seriously. And don't put off talking for tomorrow, the best time is now. - Stop blaming yourself, you find problems yourself. There is no way to command something to your heart on command.

17
star0212 answered · October 21, 2020

   Apparently you have decided to use it, but you still have a conscience in you and now you are sick. You will find your master. Grab some rubbish, some brazier, hit 2-3 children and dump you. I know girls like you.

18
cnblueofficial answered · October 21, 2020

   The most interesting thing for me is how you can lie to him for 4 years, because you ruined his life.

19
mariannasantosoficial answered · October 21, 2020

   I think it all stems from being your first man and you haven't really even had a flirtation with other guys / men. You have no basis for comparison, you have no experience. In my opinion, the ideal option for starting a family is when they have both lived, experienced some shaking love, a little grief, a little disappointment, this or that ... Believe me, in time you will look for such a man and hopefully you will find him. If you do not feel happy, it is clear that something needs to change. Unfortunately, the thrill is not enough for a stable relationship, marriage, children, etc. Why did you decide only now that you don't love him? Did another appear? Did you experience with another what you failed with? You know, the way you described him leads me to think that he will understand you and leave you alone to decide what you want. And you will be chess again.

20
romanreigns answered · October 22, 2020

   From number 1: Author, I understand you. He's too good, that's the problem. There are no quarrels, there is nothing ... there is nothing to hold on to, there is a thrill ... It would be nice to have someone to be jealous of, to increase the thrill a little ... If he is such a good boy in sex , tell him you want to be rude. Or you may start to like it ... but generally change your behavior a bit. He and we women don't know what we want ... but I definitely don't like good boys either, I've always been attracted to bad guys: D

21
livye69 answered · October 22, 2020

   And I like you, if I read correctly. Finally, while I saw a void and imagined how much I could choose - it so happened that he went with another and stabbed me - just when I wasn't expecting. He even fell in love with her. Then my intention for separation and emptiness turned into suffering and glasses broken in my eyes, the pain is indescribable. Suddenly, from being alone and bored, I became the victim who had been cruelly cheated on.

22
miss_riss answered · October 22, 2020

   Hello Dear Author! I'm number 12. Thanks. that you answered my questions! They tie the intrigue of your film even more! ;))) You say that you have never experienced love and happiness with a man? And do you know exactly what love is? don't get me wrong, but sometimes we ourselves have high expectations for things in life! Almost - a strong glow around the beloved, ringing in the ears when it appears! This is not the case, this is not the case at all! You are a young girl and you have no experience ... it is normal! I am very afraid of disappointing you, but it is not necessary for a person to meet the great love in his life! Things change very dynamically, moral values ​​are devalued at the expense of things and objects, great compromises have to be made! People have become great imitators, manipulators and artists! From my experience, I'll tell you that I've often come across women, who play roles and adjust to my requirements, guided by some benefit! Things are very complicated and complex! I'm telling you quite seriously - do not rush to act! You say you have sex and it's good! That it doesn't always work out is normal for a young couple, you need time to adjust! Look in this area you can always share who likes what and things will get better! many advise you to talk to the boy and leave him immediately! I'm not sure it's right! It is not clear how he will react! You say he's good, kind, perfect! But think for yourself - he loves you and you have been together for more than 4 years and he thinks everything is fine, right? Imagine the stress and surprise she will experience! I would hardly predict his reaction! It's dangerous! Even if he immediately agrees with you and accepts things, it is not clear where he will go in the future! I'm not saying to scare you, and to be prepared for everything! I'm a good psychologist (it's not my profession), I read a lot of books, I've watched movies, I know about specific cases! Judging by myself - I pass for chrisim and good, but I have had extreme situations in my life when I was on the verge of losing control and doing stupid things that I regret and pay for until the end of my earthly days! The line between good and evil is very thin, between passivity and violence! Be careful and beware! I sincerely wish you success! for which to regret and pay until the end of my earthly days! The line between good and evil is very thin, between passivity and violence! Be careful and beware! I sincerely wish you success! for which to regret and pay until the end of my earthly days! The line between good and evil is very thin, between passivity and violence! Be careful and beware! I sincerely wish you success!

23
sweetie_kittie answered · October 22, 2020

   You are both to blame for this situation, not just you. Every man can judge whether the woman next to him is experiencing something or not. If he was as good as you say, he wouldn't think only of himself and want to have you because he loves you, but he would leave you for his and your good. I would do so after a few tries like his. I would not allow myself to have a person next to me who does not love me and does not want me.

24
lady_sofi answered · October 22, 2020

   Obviously you live a different life. And you will not forgive him if you miss him - it is worse to marry him and then start cheating.

25
quite_pervert_shorthairgirl05 answered · October 22, 2020

   number 24 .. are you aware that this man loves her .. who crazy will give up what he loves? he is hardly a masochist and he would cause himself pain and pain because he felt and suspected that she did not love him .. he feels safe with her .. and no one runs away from it!

26
keekeeme answered · October 23, 2020

   I liked the story of number 22 - a classic! :-) Author, and I advise you - leave it for now, and then whatever the sword shows. As number 20 said, I think at least part of the problem is that he is your first man and you have no basis for comparison. If one does not see the bad, one cannot appreciate the good. As someone has already said, I think he is partly to blame for the situation. Excessive dedication can't be a good thing, and the fact that you're writing here proves it. It is good for a person to be responsible and serious, to give, but he should not allow himself to be blinded by this. In no case should one allow oneself to be taken for granted, for two reasons: First, because it is not a given, everyone has a limit above which he takes his hat and leaves, and second, because when they take it for granted and for "possession" as she put it, they stop appreciating you. They stop fighting for you. And one needs struggle, challenges and difficulties to deal with. The spirit is like a muscle, if you don't train it, if you don't overcome any resistance, it atrophies. When everything is too easy, when someone else solves the problems, there is apathy and lack of motivation, which is deadly. This is what you miss. I just think your man is too naive, in terms of life. It is not normal and not fair in a relationship to always take care of everything, and as we see it is not healthy for the relationship itself. I don't know if you've talked to him before, but if you want just send him a link to this topic. You can hardly do better than you described it here, because in person you often miss important moments, especially when he's worried - and I don't think it's very easy and pleasant for you to have this conversation. I wish you both success!

27
justlook11 answered · October 23, 2020

   Hi, I totally agree with number 1 ... Maybe you've never encountered so-called "bad boys" and other bad boys ... Believe me, if you were with 1 of the two types of men, you would really fall in love with this nice and caring man ... Years ago I, like you, had a great boy, but I didn't appreciate him ... Then I went through the 2nd type, one in "" because he is secretive, you are jealous of him, he is cold with you, and you keep running after him .... The other is really bad, insults you, encroaches on you, makes you feel insignificant and undeserved love, and finally you start believing ... Well, a few years later I met a man like yours , for me he is everything and if I had not gone through hell, I would not have been able to appreciate him ... You will not love him, leave him, but so that he keeps this goodness for another .... Do not deceive him , somewhere,there is a girl who is ready to give him all the love she is capable of .... vvv

28
passcodeofficial answered · October 23, 2020

   I talked to him last night, explained everything to him - I don't even know how I managed to say things in a smooth tone. I was convulsing inwardly, my thoughts seemed to rage, but I still thought I had told him everything as the situation required. However, his reaction was not very expected, I have never seen him like that. I expected him to talk, to dissuade me from parting, or to get angry, to shout, or to hit something, but he looked like a lost child in a huge park full of people. He just looked at me in disbelief, amazement, and somehow blankly, and when I finished and asked him what we were going to do, what he thought, what he wanted, he said he didn't know and left. He's at work today, and he didn't come back to get dressed or at least get a suit, but he may have bought it, he didn't want to go home. I don't know if I need to worry about him. I think he blocked my number, he's busy, and in general, when I call him, even if he talks to someone else, he gives me a free signal. That's his phone. And I don't know if I should call him at all. I don't know whether to wait for him to come home and talk or leave while he's gone. I don't know, I just didn't expect that. The author

29
cute_babies answered · October 23, 2020

   Just spit on your heels, dear author! I'm number 23 and there I described in detail that his reaction would be unpredictable and I was right, right !? The worst thing is that in practice he has not yet reacted - in my opinion he is currently in shock! Once you've exposed things to him ... get out and don't take meetings with him and in uninhabited places! beware girl, no kidding! Believe in a man boiling and boiling in life and seeing all the filth and meanness of people! Remember from me - there are no good and bad people .... it's all a matter of good or bad deeds! Depending on the situation, everyone can do good or bad! It is relative! I hope you understand me ... and I hope it's not what I think ... that you pulled the Devil by the tail!

30
russforyou answered · October 23, 2020

   Eh ... he did a bad job, he obviously really loves you. But darling ... you have the right to be happy and to seek your happiness! Give him time to understand you ... just don't come back to him out of pity. If you really don't love him, there's no point in continuing to be with him. One day you will get tired and you will start cheating on him, because maybe then you will find someone to fall in love with ... then the situation will be even worse. So, you better split up now. It will pass. He's used to you. I am also one of those people who take the divisions VERY hard and roar for months ... even years, but in the end, I can say with all my heart that time really has its influence! Even if he asks you to return to him or threatens you, he does not do so out of regret, so you will both suffer. One day he will get tired and overcome you - let him allow time to do his job. Yes, at first it is difficult, especially since he is used to you, it may take years to overcome you ... but in the end he wants or does not want to - he will do it, even if it seems impossible to him :). I speak from personal experience. Given how much I'm in love and how much I love ....

31
para30slaskbi answered · October 23, 2020

   Let the boy find a good girl.

32
lagerthaa answered · October 24, 2020

   You are too elementary, people like you - under the road and over the road. The man deserves something better, definitely ...

33
sapo answered · October 24, 2020

   I decided to express my opinion - I'm sorry, but I'll be a little more direct, but the author will excuse me for that. You just can't appreciate what you've found. So now you are looking for him, you are worried about him - so you just LOVE him. Obviously you don't know what you want - you are probably one of the spoiled girls who always have what they want, and do not appreciate what is given to them. There are very few men like yours, probably quite rare. Some other woman will rejoice at this "treasure" that you have missed. He offered you everything, and you just left him. Honey, what normal person runs away from his happiness? You just don't deserve a good man like him. You should have met someone who doesn't pay attention to you at all, someone who doesn't want to hug you for a good morning, someone who won't give you a flower on any occasion. Then you will appreciate what you had. Then you will understand that this was the man for you. But the old people say, "The bird once said on his shoulder," I'm sorry I was so direct, don't take offense, but I just wanted to tell you. It would just be foolish not to do your best to go back to him and make everything normal again. But your life is yours and We have no right to interfere in it, but this is just my advice. And once again I apologize, there is nothing personal in what is written, I just think this is the truth. if you do not do everything possible to return to him and again everything will be normal as before. But your life is yours and We have no right to interfere in it, but this is just my advice. And once again I apologize, there is nothing personal in what is written, I just think this is the truth. if you do not do everything possible to return to him and again everything will be normal as before. But your life is yours and We have no right to interfere in it, but this is just my advice. And once again I apologize, there is nothing personal in what is written, I just think this is the truth.

34
_lindaa answered · October 24, 2020

   At least after this happens to him, he will come to his senses that not everything is under his control to come down to earth now ...

35
nika_lodge answered · October 24, 2020

   I have a question for the author ... I am interested in whether she communicates with other men in her daily life ... colleagues or friends?

36
aimeemorakot answered · October 24, 2020

   Authorkeeeee, you acted stupidly :( You'll be sorry one day, very soon .. And I did like you, I left a man who would carry me in his arms, who everyone would like and I went back to my ex, who shortened my life with 10 years, continues to shorten it ... If there is an option fix things quickly! All the nonsense with emotion, passion is up to time .. every day I think about my mistake and I feel like hitting my head somewhere, really, so much me is angry with myself how I fucked up, you screw up your life, you screw up is the right word!

37
yg_kplus answered · October 24, 2020

   37, but since it shortens your life, why don't you go looking for another one like the first one? You probably can't go back to him, but you'll still find another ...

38
fredives84 answered · October 24, 2020

   to 38 out of 37 - I will leave very soon .. I still hope for a miracle, but it's still for a while and then the same thing again ... but I really lost a lot of nerves :( and only because of that I will leave .. otherwise my self-esteem is I've been kicking for a long time ... it's all the same for him now

39
peaceloveecstazy answered · October 24, 2020

   37 people like you "almost" serve to be alone for life. And what a great image says, "Women are the worst flaw of a man who can leave you alone" is absolutely true. First you were with your ex, for some reason you left him, then Mr. Perfect appeared. You later regretted that you were with this "supposedly good" and returned with feelings to your ex. Now you're sorry you're back again. In time, maybe you'll reunite with that one and you'll still feel sorry for your ex or, who knows, for someone else. Don't you feel that you define every action as a mistake, and you blame another person for it :) I know that I am not the person to tell you such things, but even if you have a misterly world to carry you in your arms, one day you will be dissatisfied and you will not respect him.

40
hornylatina21 answered · October 24, 2020

   40, I don't see 37 somewhere blaming someone else for their mistakes? And the fact that a person sometimes wanders back and forth, looks stupid from the side, but it happens ... The important thing is not to become a habit, but to draw the right conclusions. 37, tell me, after all, what is it about, what shortens your life?

41
KatherinaK answered · October 25, 2020

   You argue with each other, and no one wonders where the author disappeared? Time has passed and her disappearance is embarrassing!

42
cple1234 answered · October 25, 2020

   I've been through this on both sides for 41 years, that's why I'm telling you that this condition is a real pain, it's really sick :) I had one many, many years ago, but I remember everything, because such stories are a great teacher and life experience. He came and went, he came again, he left again and so on for 5 years. She felt something, she came and she didn't like it, from there I was immediately beaten by a jester, then in the third month she caught up with someone else. After half a year she came again, told me a bunch of love things again, and then she couldn't stand it, she couldn't do that, etc. And to say that I beat her, slapped or cursed her, no! Everything was within normal limits. And so, after 200 departures and returns, he caught one, and then decided to look for me again in a year or so. But then I "could not stand it" or got smarter to know that a bad person does not please. Then it was a song, I forgot it quickly, because it wasn't easy to go zigzag for 5 years and wonder where your mistake is and why someone swears at you so much and both hates you and comes back to you :) And one day like Today, for example, I remember with a smile what a fool I was then and how much this behavior of hers helped me in my life experience. The same as 37, confused, always looking for problems in others, whether former or unfulfilled dreams and what not. And the truth about such people is that they are mostly very ankle, very but very disoriented, today they decide one thing, tomorrow they decide another, they always envy and think about what would happen if ... something is there and so they always miss the moment to live exactly now, right today. You see the result, always dissatisfied, always grumbling and not for talking at all :) because it wasn't easy for 5 years to go in a zigzag and wonder where your mistake is and why someone swears at you so much and both hates you and comes back to you :) And one day like today, for example, I remember with a smile what I was a fool then and how much this behavior of hers helped me in my life experience. The same as 37, confused, always looking for problems in others, whether former or unfulfilled dreams and what not. And the truth about such people is that they are mostly very ankle, very but very disoriented, today they decide one thing, tomorrow they decide another, they always envy and think about what would happen if ... something is there and so they always miss the moment to live exactly now, right today. You see the result, always dissatisfied, always grumbling and not for talking at all :) because it wasn't easy for 5 years to go in a zigzag and wonder where your mistake is and why someone swears at you so much and both hates you and comes back to you :) And one day like today, for example, I remember with a smile what I was a fool then and how much this behavior of hers helped me in my life experience. The same as 37, confused, always looking for problems in others, whether former or unfulfilled dreams and what not. And the truth about such people is that they are mostly very ankle, very but very disoriented, today they decide one thing, tomorrow they decide another, they always envy and think about what would happen if ... something is there and so they always miss the moment to live exactly now, right today. You see the result, always dissatisfied, always grumbling and not for talking at all :) I remember with a smile what a fool I was then and how much this behavior of hers helped me in my life experience. The same as 37, confused, always looking for problems in others, whether former or unfulfilled dreams and what not. And the truth about such people is that they are mostly very ankle, very but very disoriented, today they decide one thing, tomorrow they decide another, they always envy and think about what would happen if ... something is there and so they always miss the moment to live exactly now, right today. You see the result, always dissatisfied, always grumbling and not for talking at all :) I remember with a smile what a fool I was then and how much this behavior of hers helped me in my life experience. The same as 37, confused, always looking for problems in others, whether former or unfulfilled dreams and what not. And the truth about such people is that they are mostly very ankle, very but very disoriented, today they decide one thing, tomorrow they decide another, they always envy and think about what would happen if ... something is there and so they always miss the moment to live exactly now, right today. You see the result, always dissatisfied, always grumbling and not for talking at all :) today they decide one thing, tomorrow they decide another, they always envy and think about what it would be like if ... something is there and so they always miss the moment to live right now, right today. You see the result, always dissatisfied, always grumbling and not for talking at all :) today they decide one thing, tomorrow they decide another, they always envy and think about what it would be like if ... something is there and so they always miss the moment to live right now, right today. You see the result, always dissatisfied, always grumbling and not for talking at all :)

43
ronaldocaiado answered · October 25, 2020

   I hope you will excuse me for the delayed continuation of my story, but the circumstances came together this way. On Saturday, as I was advised by number 29 (thank you for all the writings), I packed my bags and no smoke. Of course, I didn't have the opportunity to take everything, but I took the most necessary things with me. I rented a room, which is paid for in the evening. In the evening Sasho called me, he had come home and his every word was filled with anger. He wanted to see me, to go home, but he scared me because he was too aggressive. Later he called me again, this time he was calmer and more balanced, we arranged a meeting in a restaurant and saw each other there. I made sure he had no intention of showing strength, and we went home to speak calmly. Well, we've had much more civilized conversations, but I have nothing to complain about. At dawn we were completely drained, we decided to part forever, but honestly I was so tired that I could not walk to the place where I had rented a room. He offered to take me, I accepted. When we fell asleep, however, we both looked at the situation from a different angle. I felt that this was the end and I wanted my old one back. However, there was nowhere to go. I went to collect the rest of the rags, and he got angry. There was another scandal. We generally chewed the same thing. Until we finally came to the conclusion that apparently none of us really wanted this separation. We may need to change our relationship in some way, but we don't want to separate. We talked a lot, but we can't predict the future. We've both been on vacation since yesterday. We decided to spend the first half separately and the second part together. We'll see what happens, we are both insecure. I'm completely confused by myself and I literally don't know what I feel, what I want, or why. One moment I want to be together, the next I'm afraid I don't love him, and then I think I'm in some kind of crisis, depression or pit. And he doesn't know what to do, how to act and what to say, it's unknown to him and I'm sure he feels disgusting. In fact, he said it himself. He loves me, but he knows if it makes sense to be together if I don't have the same feelings, and he's naturally afraid that it will fade away now, only to happen again in five years. I'm leaving today, he left for his point yesterday. I'll see you in a week and maybe make a final decision. But even if we get together, we don't know if things will work out again. To number 36 - yes, I communicate with many men in general. Colleagues, friends, customers. I wonder what caused this question? To number 37: I'm sorry you're suffering. I hope that things will change for the better for you soon. Success! About 42 (/ 29/23/12), I'm sorry for the embarrassment and thank you again for your attention on this topic. I've read everything, you know. It just seems unnecessary to respond to everyone, so I will only thank you for your attention and opinion. The author so I will only thank you for your attention and opinion. The author so I will only thank you for your attention and opinion. The author

44
b1b1w1 answered · October 25, 2020

   Author, it is normal to be confused and disoriented at the moment. And it's normal to break even the nastiest relationship, to want to go back at first, because you're afraid of the insecurity in front of you, and the relationship, no matter how nasty, at least you know it. So don't turn the shovel so soon, you're just fooling yourself and him. For the week you will be separated, nothing will change except that you miss each other. You will only count the days and hours until this week is over and see you again. That is why I advise you not to be like 95% of your colleagues by gender, who are still "come to me, come to me", but to take responsibility for your decision and to suffer the consequences. At least one woman to defend her position, no matter how difficult. Since you're not sure if he's for you, you've made the right decision to split up, but separate truly - for 6 months, a year, as much as you came and as much as you need to clarify things for yourself. But don't expect to clarify them tomorrow. Just accept that you have to go through this phase of suffering, and the more you try to avoid it, the more you delay the agony. 43, what can I tell you, since you needed so many "departures and returns" to understand what a woman is, then you really needed a lesson :-) Once or twice it is normal for a man not to be able to choose, after it's just a pampering and nothing more.

45
conny_milf_ answered · October 25, 2020

   Hello, dear author! I'm glad you're okay! I am 12/23/30/42. Yes. I am interested in your topic and I follow it daily! ;)) I am flattered that this has not gone unnoticed! To some extent, I was in the situation in which your friend put you, so it was not difficult to predict the events! There are differences, of course ... Let's not get carried away. Now you're on vacation and you won't see each other for a week. My advice is to try to relax and not think about the past or the future! Give yourself completely to the holiday! Do things that are your favorite and bring you pleasure and pleasure! Communicate with nature, with people you love and love you! Do not discuss with anyone what happened to your relationship during your vacation! I know it's easy to say and hard to do, but get completely out of the complicated case! I also will not analyze now according to your last comment! So as not to burden you further! When you see your friend again in a week ... it may be that you have an answer on how to proceed - your subconscious will tell you - trust him! Fate never poses problems for us that we cannot deal with! You have the resources (it is obvious that you are a very smart and nice girl;)))) and you will not have any difficulties! Easy vacation! ;))

46
dreameronthescreen answered · October 25, 2020

   from number 36 ... I asked you the question because when we communicate with many people we realize and make comparisons and see differences for the people we have next to us .. I don't know if you have thought about what you have next to you and if you have seen in your environment something better or worse ...

47
_sammy_taylor answered · October 25, 2020

   I support 45! It is perfectly normal to be confused at the moment and to be insecure. Just please don't feel guilty and don't go back to your relationship because it won't make sense. You have to separate to seek your happiness with another!

48
smmspa answered · October 25, 2020

   I suggest that in about a year a TV "soap" series based on this story be made. I am also interested in the development of your relationship, so I give the idea to film this life "joke".

49
bigbootyfreak77 answered · October 26, 2020

   Author: I think I will listen to comment 46 and stop thinking about the topic. It just doesn't make sense, I revolve around the same thing, I chew everything over and over, and nothing comes out of all this head banging. I really hope that when I see S. it becomes clear to me what I want, because at the moment I have no idea. You may be right that I should not return to this relationship, but I find it foolish to do so in order to keep my original intention, not because I really want to. I will see S. on Monday and we will find out what will happen ... up and down. Because even if we get back together, I'm not sure if things will be okay. However, we are now experiencing a turmoil in our relationship. Number 47, I may have made some comparisons, but I haven't seen a more stable (at first glance) connection than ours, but for most others there are more emotional (even stressful) situations. To number 46: I suspected you had experienced something like that. How did you survive the separation?

50
bulletformyvalentine answered · October 26, 2020

   Dear Author! I am 46. You think and act correctly! Congratulations! Thank you for trusting my judgment! As people say - Ask a patillo! ;))) You ask how to experience separation? Well, when I was in such a situation and I was shaking in front of more experienced friends in life, they told me a Serbian joke - "It takes time to pass!" ....;))) In Bulgarian it means - Time heals! I was really unhappy for a while, but I overcame it and now even in a funny and wondering why I was talking nonsense - life is colorful and offered me a lot of complicated puzzles to solve and the grief of separation melted like May snow! My advice, if it comes to separation is: Find active activities, new challenges, learn something, develop your career, travel, enjoy the beautiful nature ...! ; ))) Just beware of a common mistake - do not rush into a new relationship on the principle of "wedge wedge kills!";))) In such moments, looking for a quick replacement, one lowers his criteria and can be very disappointed! I tell you because I did it and the effect was unpleasant - after parting with one type of woman, I quickly met another and after a while I found out that she is an absolute copy of my ex-girlfriend ....;))) they were terribly similar and of appearance and character and the way they treated me .... they were even of the same zodiac sign ....! You understand me, don't you? ;))) The good thing about you is that you do not comply with the opinions of others (everyone liked your current friend), you are ready to pursue your own happiness (another question is whether at this fragile age you know exactly what you are looking for;)))) , you are rebellious, smart and polite .... but you also listen to advice when you are in unfamiliar waters! Abe has a great future ahead of you ... I'm sure! ;))) Now rest fully! ;))))