Hello! For the first time I am writing on a website. I hope to get some advice from you. I will be grateful to express your own opinion on the matter :) Well, I'm starting with the substance. I am an 18-year-old girl. About a year ago I met a man of 32. We started to communicate quite often, most often we talked about things related to art, be it music, painting, etc. After a while, he offered to see me live. (We are from different cities) I was quite hesitant at the beginning because for the first time I would go out with a person 14 years older than me, but in the end I agreed. The day came when we saw each other, had a good time, listened to music, walked around the city. After our meeting he went to his city. We kept in touch. One night while we were writing, he told me he wanted to talk. He was quite tense and then he told me that for the first time he liked a girl 14 years younger than him. Honestly, I wasn't surprised, but then I started asking myself questions like, "What if I was with him?" , "What do I feel for him?". So far, I may have had some minimal sympathy. After a while I had a trip to his city. He was looking forward to seeing me. It had been about 4-5 months since we had seen each other. So I arrived in the city and we went to a music concert. I was sitting next to him and at one point I felt him take my hand lightly. We sat like that throughout the concert.
We had a great time. The next night we went out to a park. We sat on a bench, but for some reason we just kept quiet and looked at one point, but the moment came when he just grabbed me and hugged me very tightly. I admit ..I didn't want to let him go. We just sat huddled and he played with my hair. It was already quite late and I told him that I had to go back to the hotel ... but he took my hand and pulled me to him and kissed me. After the kiss, he sent me to the hotel, and in the morning I went back to my city. Since then, I've started to think a lot about what's going on. He's still in my head. We had other meetings after that, but in the end there was always a kiss. To this day, we keep in touch, but there is a sense of attraction. I would honestly say that I am a little scared of our age difference, but this person has become a very important part of my life. I want to ask for advice on whether to have a serious conversation with him about something more serious or whether it is better to maintain a normal relationship. Thanks in advance! :)
Answers 6
What is written sounds like a beautiful, pink, romantic story. Everyone has had such moments and they are very beautiful and memorable. I'm sure that despite your hesitations, you feel in heaven as you write, but if you think you have something serious with him, it would at least mean moving to his city and having children soon. The person is old enough to want to be serious and will either ask for it with you or will only use you and break your heart. If you are willing to take a risk - try it, if you do not leave it and you will soon meet another. Just for advice - the closer the person is to you, the more often you will meet and get to know his bad sides and you will be able to decide if it is for you. So from a distance it is not good ... you risk coming across a completely different person than what you imagine him to be. Success!
14 g difference nowadays are not so much. Rather, I am worried that you are small, only 18 years old and you will definitely go through more periods of development until you become 25-28 years old, and these periods will definitely not be children, family, etc. until for him The time has come for him at the age of 32. More precisely, he thought about that, and not about the age difference itself. If you were, say, at 24, he at 38, things are connected, but 18 ......
But. 1, did you throw beans that you know all these things? You wrote complete nonsense. That's how you take women men and have straight children I don't know. Author, I was in a relationship with a girl 17 years younger than me, 2.5 years. However, she didn't like me so much and used me a little. After all, it was the best relationship I've ever had in my life. While I was with her, two others her age (girls she didn't know) took me down. That is, I was not and still am not to be discarded. Now I imagine what it would be like if I was with one of them. In one of the girls, her father was 17 years older than her mother. I guess that explains why she was attracted only to older men. People, understand that there are such connections and they are no more abnormal than the others.
My advice is to look for a boy from your city and your age. Considerations: 1. From different cities, it is difficult to maintain such a relationship and you can not get to know the man like that. 2-3 meetings in a few months is nothing. You do not have the opportunity to communicate often live and judge. 2. The difference in the years -14 years is smaller. You do not need it! You're only 18, and he's a 32-year-old man, and I guess he's ready for marriage. To get married at the age of 18, child ... You hardly want that - maybe you want to study, to have fun ... He has been on this path for a long time. You will simply deprive yourself of things you have to experience. And when years pass you will be 40 years old, and he will be 54 years old. It will be great for him to have a young woman-nurse, to look after his children and then to look after him as well. The difference in age is felt when the children are small, one is a child of 3 years and another of 17 years, as well as when the years go by - one is 50 years old, another is 64 years old. Think correctly! If you want flirting, fun - ok, but do not forget that a person is attracted, and you are 18 years old, so you better be careful and do not deal with it. And for a serious relationship - you do not need! In my opinion, you are a young girl and do not waste your time with older men! Time flies and use your youth.
You described it very beautifully. I believe that everything in the future between you will be just as beautiful! The fact that he is more mature is a big plus - he will not tease you, play with you as a young man, he will be more responsible and more adequate as a partner and, God willing, as a husband. Believe me, everything will be fine. And don't take faith in guilds. They always want to make someone unhappy for life, but everything should be done only according to their smelly understandings.
Continue with him, then you will watch your girlfriends have fun with boyfriends at discos, while your loved one watches a game on the couch, and you bring him a salad, for example. The best and most exciting years are ahead of you, youth passes so quickly! Don't you want to study, to build a better future with a more prestigious and respected profession than a waitress or a saleswoman? To see something more than your city? For him, the priorities are different - marriage, child, family life with all its difficulties, monotony, thoughts about money and bills. And when you are a woman in the prime of her sexuality, a tired uncle will snore next to you, not to be caressed by a young lover.