There Is A Kind Of Innate Masochism In The Bulgarian Married Woman With A Lover

   You don't care so much about your mistress, but look after your wife. Because as you left, it is possible that she will show you in time what is masochistic. Then you will answer many questions.

   Man, you're in such a big mistake you can't imagine. You must be thinking of a prince on a white horse rescuing poor Cinderella? This is a fairy tale. In real life, women are neither princesses nor cinderellas. It is normal for a woman, as a physically weak being, to look for a strong and dominant man as a partner. And strong and dominant men fight - it's no secret. She may not like beating her, but she won't like it even more if her husband is a weak mollusk and can't punch like a man. If you don't believe me, tell me - why didn't she leave her husband, the bad bully, and go with you, the good savior? Now women will start explaining to me how wrong I am, but they are just ashamed to admit it because then people like you will call them masochistic and insult them.

   Author, you just don't realize it. To such women, men are usually wonderful people. All the talk about how unhappy their marriage is, how they don't pay attention to them at all and the like, in 90% of cases have nothing to do with the truth. As you can see, she immediately found a new lover, and very often there are several lovers at the same time. Such women have absolutely no intention of divorcing and do not do so unless they are caught. Don't be fooled and don't think about it. You have a family, take care of it and enjoy life. There is nothing better than that.

   For many women with lovers, it is only an on-duty excuse for the lover, as men have that they no longer even sleep with their wives and it is only a matter of time before they divorce. They lie while they can, and when they can't, they change to the next one. Yes, you are lucky, you will get rid of it. He doesn't think of her, that's how he likes the situation. J.

   She may have considered various things - stability, financial situation, habit, open marriage, risks to take. Otherwise, you are right that if things are not going well, it is not a decision to have a lover. But that's how she chose. Maybe her husband has a mistress and they live like that ....

   See now here the case may be different, she does not love him, but probably he gives her money, supports the child and the whole household (you did not write if this woman has a job and educated) When he leaves the faucet will stop, will provide support around BGN 200-300 only for the child. She is not sure of you that you will support her and the child like her husband. This automatically means that she will have to work, realize, even save. These thoughts in a woman's mind are stronger and can prevail over any love. That's why she prefers to sit with her husband, spend his money and have a lover for fun.

   That's because they don't want to take risks. They want one chair to sit on the other and make sure they don't end up on the ground.

   Honey ... it's good that you found the strength and dumped her and got your life in order ... because I have news for you - she's NOT unhappy with her husband. Besides, I'm sure they have sex once a month / week. These are phrases and theater for you - you're just for fun. Wondering how I know? Because I played that game too. She did not abandon him because she feels good in her marriage. No woman is in a relationship if it does not cover at least 60% of her needs ... there are too many men.

   №8, your "needs", as you call them, differ from heaven to earth with the needs of the author. Author, you just got rid of it!

   Number 2, you say the biggest nonsense - strong men beat ... A strong man would never hit a woman, even if she reached out first! This is done by the complexes, larger birds than the mollusks you describe. Why do you give only the two extremes - a weak man and an animal? The golden mean is best, unfortunately it is rare in the Balkans. And the women who stand with such men are also complexes for me. A real lady will never tolerate this. Understand the meaning of the term "strong". I have no words. Very distorted thinking. As for the author, how can he be sure that he is not lying to him? Maybe she is to blame and that is her excuse. If she was a truly harassed woman, at least she wouldn't dare get a lover, let alone two. This woman is a hardened liar and selfish. Watch yours and forget about the past, author. Julian

   1. What makes your ex-mistress the exact representative sample of the "Bulgarian woman with a lover"! ?? 2. With what eyes does a man who goes with a married woman have the audacity to give moral recipes to women, even if he curses them on top of everything !?

   They became my brother. Men are much more likely to compromise than women. If a woman is with one man and he does not give her something, she will look for it from another. While if the man does not receive something from his wife it will last. It's because of marriage, it's because of feelings, it's because of the child.

   I am surprised by most of the comments. I have often asked myself the same questions as the author. Why, ajeba, when you are unhappy in your marriage and have met a person you love, do you not divorce and start a new family? I answer myself this way: these women do not believe in themselves, they do not believe in themselves out of fear. I know what I'm talking about because I was in a similar situation. My ex-husband and I had lost the spark, I felt lonely in my marriage, another man appeared, we fell in love, the relationship deepened and I faced a dilemma. I realized that I had no right to play with this person's feelings and future. Nor do I have the right to cheat on my husband. I had to choose between routine and security with a computer genius (my husband) and passionate love with a factory worker (the other man). I will share the moment I made the decision. I was walking on "Vitoshka" in Sofia and I stared at the shop windows. I liked a suit and aha to go in to measure it, I said to myself: "If I get divorced, I will never be able to set foot in this expensive store again." But then another thought came to me: "Abe, chick, are you so incompetent that you can't make money for one sex?" And the decision was made. I divorced and lived with my great love, without having any financial expectations for him. Rather, I tightened up: in addition to my permanent job, I started a second project and enrolled in a doctorate at the university. I work hard, but I feel completely satisfied with my life. Well, no one will take me to Paris for the New Year, as it was before, but the blazing fireplace at home is enough. Especially in the arms of a loved one. What is this masochism, author, and I wonder. If I knew, I would tell you, but I don't know.

   About two-thirds of women have been unfaithful and most divorces are because of it. The explanation is simple, a large percentage of them are self-centered and manic on the topic of control (as there are many jokes on this topic what, that is, what happens after marriage with a man), when mentally nervous about his absence, go to extremes, almost all mental extremes women end up with sexual arousal, men do not. Another fact is that gender inequality, which for some time now, the man is the second sex in a relationship and in society as a whole, as the only (in some professions) financially sit better. These mainly come from Western understandings. The incredible power of feminist organizations that hypnotize women on how everything should start from them, how monogamy does not exist, how women are on a pedestal and because of her empires fell. The area.

   At 27, a man from Sofia. Because I come from a poorer family, I have been in the role of a lover many times. At first I tied myself to the things that spoke to me, as the author did. Over time, you notice how the story is the same, how bad it is, but they sit with it. The truth is that there are many women who like to have more than 1 man in their life. That is why there is a constant search for lovers. In very few cases, even their main relationship has any obstacles, they just enjoy having something on the side. If the lover is richer and more generous to the woman in many cases she can abandon her main relationship and stay with the lover, but only the roles are exchanged and the search for a new lover begins soon. I have acquaintances with several married lovers. On the one hand it's cool,

   Sorry, but - they all have this software "defect". Although recently (last 4 months) I tied the knot with a committed woman, and until recently I was 8 years old. relationship, but I ended it because I could not lie and there were things that I missed there. In the same way, she - dissatisfied where she is, does not get what she needs, but her second word is "I am not aware of myself", "I do not know what I want" - otherwise a serious girl. I emphasize - neither I have a marriage or children, nor she, the conditions are easier to change than they could be - but she is pushing where she is despite the emotions we shared and despite the possibility of happiness between us. We often talk about this and the same answer and situation. I was told the game for the last. 2 months since we are intimate.

   Well, the husband is the security for the woman, and the lover is the emotion and the "breath of air" from the problems at home and the daily monotony. Women need both. They are predictable beings and know that leaving a wife with whom you have already built a home and family (even if it was not the best choice) is an extremely risky step and will be on the principle of "All or nothing", ie. If, after a while, the new chosen one turns out to be not at the level and cannot give you what you need as a mature woman, you will find yourself on two chairs on the ground, and then the situation becomes very difficult. One woman does not let go of one branch until she clings to another. It's just too risky.

   I am a woman and I somewhat agree with the author, but this condition has its psychological - mental dimensions. However, I want to say that a woman who is loved, wanted and feels at ease in her family does NOT betray her. If she does, she has serious emotional and mental disorders and needs help, not a lover. The comments on 1, 2 (especially) are absurd, and n 8. with these 60% shocks me. If the latter reads how many topics there are on this site of oversatisfied women who cheat will change their attitude. Good luck and happy holidays!

   Look now, from a man's point of view, things are clear, "you're not happy with him - you're throwing him away," but from a mother's point of view, the situation is quite different. As unhappy and ruined by her marriage as she is, she must think of her child and simply cannot afford to act guided only by her own feelings and desires. From there, the chance of divorcing a woman with a child becomes small, because before she says no, she has to consider and think about many things, how this will affect the child, what will be the future relationship with his father, etc. and etc. It is not easy to pack up, file for divorce and live with your lover. That's why most of these women just look for some comfort outside their home and decide to divorce only when their children are older. There are few who would leave their husband a child of 2-3-4-5 years. In order for a woman to do this, the situation must really be intolerable and she must be systematically subjected to physical or mental harassment. It's just that her mother's feeling tells her that in the name of the child she has to be silent and patient in order for her to grow up with both parents, in a normal family ... it's another matter that this family may not be "normal" for a long time. but she suggests to herself that once she returns to her husband's common home in the evening, they are still a "normal" family, nothing that they are sometimes about to kill. That's what happens. When a woman becomes a mother for her, everything changes fundamentally and her whole life revolves only around the child. Well, then the child grows up a little, but always remains the most important person in life and his needs and desires are the most important. the situation must indeed be intolerable and systematically subjected to physical or mental harassment. It's just that her mother's feeling tells her that in the name of the child she has to be silent and patient in order for her to grow up with both parents, in a normal family ... it's another matter that this family may not be "normal" for a long time. but she suggests to herself that once she returns to her husband's common home in the evening, they are still a "normal" family, nothing that they are sometimes about to kill. That's what happens. When a woman becomes a mother for her, everything changes fundamentally and her whole life revolves only around the child. Well, then the child grows a little, but always remains the most important person in life and his needs and desires are the most important. the situation must indeed be intolerable and systematically subjected to physical or mental harassment. It's just that her mother's feeling tells her that in the name of the child she has to be silent and patient in order for her to grow up with both parents, in a normal family ... it's another matter that this family may not be "normal" for a long time. but she suggests to herself that once she returns to her husband's common home in the evening, they are still a "normal" family, nothing that they are sometimes about to kill. That's what happens. When a woman becomes a mother for her, everything changes fundamentally and her whole life revolves only around the child. Well, then the child grows a little, but always remains the most important person in life and his needs and desires are the most important. that in the name of the child he must be silent and patient in order for him to grow up with both parents, in a normal family ... it is another matter that this family may not have been "normal" for a long time, but she suggests to herself that once in the evening she goes home to her husband in their common home, they are still a "normal" family, nothing that is sometimes on the verge of killing each other. That's what happens. When a woman becomes a mother for her, everything changes fundamentally and her whole life revolves only around the child. Well, then the child grows a little, but always remains the most important person in life and his needs and desires are the most important. that in the name of the child he must be silent and patient in order for him to grow up with both parents, in a normal family ... it is another matter that this family may not have been "normal" for a long time, but she suggests to herself that once in the evening she goes home to her husband in their common home, they are still a "normal" family, nothing that is sometimes on the verge of killing each other. That's what happens. When a woman becomes a mother for her, everything changes fundamentally and her whole life revolves only around the child. Well, then the child grows up a little, but always remains the most important person in life and his needs and desires are the most important. family, nothing that is sometimes on the verge of killing. That's what happens. When a woman becomes a mother for her, everything changes fundamentally and her whole life revolves only around the child. Well, then the child grows up a little, but always remains the most important person in life and his needs and desires are the most important. family, nothing that is sometimes on the verge of killing. That's what happens. When a woman becomes a mother for her, everything changes fundamentally and her whole life revolves only around the child. Well, then the child grows up a little, but always remains the most important person in life and his needs and desires are the most important.

   Number 19 is the most accurate! When there are children in the equation, you can't put things together so easily. I am a mother of 3 boys. Do you think they would accept another man as their father? Do you think that they will ever forgive me if I deprive them of their father, with whom they repair the car together, talk like men, go fishing, etc.? No, the answer is NO! If I remove my husband, I am left alone! Alone with three boys who will be teenagers and I have to master them so that they don't stumble. They will simply put up an unprecedented resistance and no other man will survive in my home. I know it, I'm not even mistaken. And yes, a good father, but a naughty husband with whom we are already quite cold. And yes, there is another man who makes me feel wonderful. And no, I will not beat my sons because he will not bear it. I know, I don't need to check if it would be otherwise. Masochism, no! It's just life with all its diversity and arrogant sense of humor. Will I manage, yes! I am a mother of 3 children, a man and a lover are not a problem! Watch your wife and don't forget to show her that you love her! Other destinies are not your concern.

   From 14 to 13, look at 13 and you will understand why. In general, I am a young man and I am battle-shocked by the extremely shoddy character of women over the age of 35, extremely extreme and striking scenes of extremely negative traits of the Bulgarian woman's character, and it is not even the oldest such mercantilism. displaces from some schizophrenic hysterical arrogance, independence from the woman's vision. This is also a big factor for infidelity, apart from the things quoted above. Even as a pattern from left to right, almost all people who have succeeded abroad say that they have almost completely left the country not because of the money, but because of the character of the Bulgarians.

   Everyone has the right to a personal opinion and no one can be blamed for setting a topic for discussion. Yes, masochism, humiliation and hypocrisy is living with someone you don't love, and you make all sorts of excuses. And even more masochism is to have a lover and not have any expectations from him .. In fact, the only winner in the whole situation is the lover, usually this is the man who fucks his mistress just because of some sweet stories that make her feel wonderful. How many lovers offer marriage and their heart to their married mistress? - The answer is visible - very little. Up to 20. Apparently you never assume that your husband can understand that you have a lover? If he understands, then the picture would be quite complicated in many respects and you would hardly be so confident that you will cope with the situation ... The conclusion is one:

   I also agree with number 19, but I have noticed something else - when some people become parents and the first few years, while they are with the baby (s) and young children (often for a long, indefinite period of time) begin to behave as if everything has to revolve around them, to clarify only that I do not mean around their children, but about the fact that they have become parents and this kind of work on them, because they have to combine it with work, etc. Well, about all the experiences there that they have to go through ... a lot of these people just don't think that the rest of us are somehow annoyed by their behavior. I think I'm right in what I'm saying because they became parents on their own, of their own free will - no one threatened them with a gun to say the least, and it's not right, nor is it fair to impose on them how difficult and difficult it is for them in life (when it is too heavy for them). In general, whether they are satisfied, dissatisfied - materially, sexually, whether they hinder them, weigh their children. whether they listen to them, whether they create problems for them, but all these things are high time to stop forcing them on others and to stop giving themselves so much importance and to think that everyone and everything should revolve around them ... then why do different people say: 'this child wants everything to revolve around him' - well, why - because he has absorbed the behavior (and genes) of his mother and father. Otherwise, another topic is (it could be opened) that this situation of / for the women described by n19 could have been avoided if initially the woman was not with the attitude: 'I will be with the one, because there is no better to find '. Put in a family trap, who digs for herself because of her complexes (it is of course not her fault that she has complexes, and her parents and the environment in which she grew up as a child in general) and after 3-5-7-10 years begins to see herself, people and the world in a different way, but she has already given birth to 1-2-3 children and as n19 says she should put them first. But as she says: 'another issue is that this family may not have been' normal 'for a long time, but she suggests to herself that once she returns to her husband's house in the evening, they are still a' normal 'family, nothing that sometimes they are about to kill themselves', which of course not in all cases (meaning such families is so), but in most. Also, in this way, little boys are taught that when they grow up, the woman who becomes their partner must be patient with them for everything, and to the little girls, that when they grow up they must endure their situation and reconcile as a mother. You are free to harass me if you do not agree with me. I am fully aware that my comment will create some degree of irritation. But this is my view.

   A 45-year-old woman. I agree with what the author wrote! Yes, masochism is to live by force with a person you do not love and does not love you. All sorts of excuses will be found - the children, the house, the parents, the public opinion, but these are excuses for indecisive, hypocritical and soulless people. Just imagine in the coming bright Christian holidays to celebrate with unloved people (wives, relatives, etc.), the birthdays of your children with an unloved person - a husband, to grow old with one. Imagine how much pretense and effort it takes to do all this and at the same time know that the one who loves you is somewhere with someone else or standing alone. Isn't all this madness! The excuse with the children is such a worn-out cliché that for a long time now no normal person accepts it as a normal argument, and lovers do not have to wait .... Until 20. I am a mother of 4 children - girls from two marriages (2 × 2), with a wonderful husband from her second marriage. My children are 22, 20, 9 and 7 years old. I can say that they are loved and supported a lot, even by different fathers. One cannot escape from one's past, but one can change one's present and future. I don't want to argue with you, but you will understand how wrong you are when your children grow up and go their own way. Then you will have to live alone with your chilled husband (whatever that means), grit your teeth and realize that this sacrifice was not worth it. And with a lover he can't last long for a number of reasons, either he likes it and sets conditions, or his wife understands and the drama becomes complete. Don't get me wrong - I'm not teaching you! I wish you happiness in your situation. For me, however, masochism is something else: stealing two hours a week of "happiness" with the lover and to deceive yourself that it is enough for you and makes you complete. No, I asked for complete happiness and I got it. I went out in front of the whole world, in front of all my relatives, in front of my husband, in front of my children, in front of my acquaintances and colleagues, I was spit on, I was stigmatized, I was a whore, I was ungrateful, I was bad, I was greedy (although I took nothing but my children). ), in a word, I was a freak. They prophesied my downfall and the soon-to-be inglorious return to the former, with a request for mercy. Well, I fought back, now all the omniscients either have my respect or envy my happiness. The condition for achieving this is one thing - your lover should not be a scumbag, but a person who loves you very much, and this is proved not only by sweet talk, but also by deeds. If, your lover is weak-tempered or cowardly, better without him. My late father used to say, "

   To number 20 - I don't believe your husband will continue to be part of the soap when he finds out about the deputy in bed. And yes, you will have to be a single mother with 3 or three children, and your lover will run away with 300.

   To number 24-Ma'am, I really liked your comment. This is exactly the right behavior of a woman - not to hide like a rat and cheat, but once she has decided that she loves another man to fight somehow for her love. whore-no, you are not a whore, with this ugly word I would call a woman who secretly fucks her lover and then hugs her children with these hands. And about male lovers you do not know how right you are - probably 99% of they really are scoundrels who pile up pieces to brag or knock on the avant-garde. It's hard for someone who falls in love with such a "man" to really fall painfully to the ground from two chairs. And you, author, if you harness this energy with which you are worried about your mistress for your wife, I am convinced that you will receive a proper treatment from her and you will feel far happier ...