First I want to ask the moderators to add my story because I need advice. Hello to everyone who reads my story. I am a 19 year old girl. I live my life without parents and I have been at home since I was 5 years old. I have a mother who is abroad but she doesn't care about me at all. She didn't come to see me, she didn't look for me to hear how I was, or anything, I just didn't exist for her. But it hurts me a lot that he is not interested in me, but only in my brothers. She had told me before that she would send me enough money for people not to say anything. I try to cut it, but I can't. Although she doesn't look for me and doesn't care about me, I can't do without her. I try but I can't and that's it. I'd like some advice or something to tell me because I need help. The other problem I have is that I constantly argue with everyone. I try not to make conflicts, but I keep thinking that people think badly of me and I don't know how to help myself. I came here from a lot of mental and physical and sexual harassment. As a child I was an unwanted child and now it has an impact. It's just that when someone looks at me a little like that or some people talk to each other, I always think it's because of me, then I realize it's not because of me. Very difficult for me. I don't know how to fix it. How not to argue with people I just have not learned and do not know how to act in certain situations. I really sometimes think about what I exist for. I do not believe that everything will be fine because it has been so for a long time. Give me some advice, if you understand me. It's just that when someone looks at me a little like that or some people talk to each other, I always think it's because of me, then I realize it's not because of me. Very difficult for me. I don't know how to fix it. How not to quarrel with people I just have not learned and do not know how to act in certain situations. I really sometimes think about what I exist for. I do not believe that everything will be fine because it has been so for a long time. Give me some advice, if you understand me. It's just that when someone looks at me a little like that or some people talk to each other, I always think it's because of me, then I realize it's not because of me. Very difficult for me. I don't know how to fix it. How not to argue with people I just have not learned and do not know how to act in certain situations. I really sometimes think about what I exist for. I do not believe that everything will be fine because it has been so for a long time. Give me some advice, if you understand me.
Answers 5
You have taken the right path - you have realized things. You need time and even more bitter experience to learn on your own. Just try to learn from yourself and react the next time you think is right. At some point you will probably go to the other extreme, you will become a soft Mara and they will start trampling you, but that is how you will find your balance. Your mother dumped her. He obviously considers you a mistake. It is perfectly normal for the mother to be the brightest image of a person, but your longing is so strong because we tend to give special weight to the things we need but have never had. It is the same in love and in everything else. Try not to drink water. The more time passes, the more you need it. Fortunately, the need for another person, even a mother, is not vital. It's hard, but fight back. Build yourself as a self-sufficient person, so as not to transfer these deficits one day to your partner or children. Success! You're a smart girl, you can handle it!
Thanks. You helped me a lot.
Parental love, which some of us lack in most cases, affects ourselves - we look for it outside, and when we do not receive it, we behave badly with others, we feel angry .. Life is given to learn from our mistakes , to gain experience on our own, because there is no one to teach us. Don't let the thoughts of your mother bother you, she has chosen her path ... leave her as hard as it sounds and focus on your life! You are the most important at the moment, surround yourself only with people who need your presence and they appreciate you! These people will not replace your parents, but at least you will know that despite the huge lack you have people for whom you mean something!
Thank you for the advice.
I also grew up in homes. From the age of 4 I understand you completely and I always wanted my mother to be with me. I wish you a lot of luck. Talk to her honestly and tell her how you feel. Woman of 23